Tuesday, August 01, 2006

True Wife Confession 35 -Eligible to be elected President

Confession #341

When I say that I think you're the most wonderful guy on the planet, I mean it literally. I love you

Confession #342

I hate how you belittle everything I say by making it seem like all or nothing. I told you I need a break. I need some help. I can't take you coming home at 8 p.m. every night. I asked you to come home early a couple of nights a week. But all you do is tell me, well you either want the money or you me at home. I want to tell you that one night when you get home so late, you will think every is in bed asleep. But we will be gone

Confession #343

aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!! you are driving me nuts, you are such a pussy! get a back bone and start making decisions for yourself. I don't ask you if I can go out for lunch, why must you call me first - I am NOT YOUR MOTHER!!!!! she can't even stand to listen to you either. If you aren't going to use your dick, then by all means cut it off and give it to someone who will. you fucking pussy man.

Confession #344

When I "OOPS" got pregnant with our second baby when our first was only a few months old...I did that on purpose. I knew then that we probably were not going to make it. I wanted another child, for myself and so our daughter would not be an only child. I did not want to have to take any biological clock issues into account later.

Confession #345

I am not losing weight on purpose. I need you to love me the way I am. If I lost 50 lbs. and you bacame a better husband I would hate you for it because I would know for a fact how shallow you are. Now, I only suspect it. When you are gone I will loose the weight because I hate it even more than you do

Confession #346

When you go into the bathroom, lock the door and spend like 30 minutes..every day. I know you are jacking off in there. I guess it is good that you know how to make SOMEBODY come.

You have never given me an orgasm. Ever.

Confession #347

I think your parents are ignorant morons. Always have. Always will. I used to wonder how you turned out so normal. Now, after 10 years, I know you didn't.

Confession #348

Remember when I found out my father was terminally ill and you just gave me a quick hug and said "Sorry. But if anybody can beat this it is your Dad." And then left the house to do some stupid, unimportant thing with your buddies? I lost more respect and love for you at that moment than at any other single time during our marriage.

When you told me you were leaving and I cried. It was for our children. For my own sake I felt only relief.

You said you felt my father had forgiven you for leaving me and the kids before he died. You were wrong. If he hadn't been so sick he would have kicked your ass.

Confession #349

your nasty feet make me want to vomit

Confession #350

No matter whether you get 4 hours or 14 hours of sleep, you are the crankiest SOB when you wake up. You wake up all mopey and refuse to speak and do nothing but heave these ultra heavy sighs. Grow up. By the time you decide to open your eyes, I've been up for 2 hours with the baby and have the laundry done for the day.

When you whine all day about how exhausted you are, and then choose to come home and stay up to 2:00 a.m. to watch movies or toy around online, don't expect sympathy.


Jaelithe said...

Ah, #350, I have so been there . . . thankfully my man shaped up after I said pretty much all of that to his face.

Kelly said...

I tell my husband #350 ALL THE TIME. He was just bitching about not getting enough sleep Sunday night, and he went to bed at midnight. Moron. Grownups go to bed earlier when they are tired.

Benticore said...

Is it even okay for me to post here, being a husband? Well, here goes.

#350 - I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. Usually I'm the bouncy, upbeat one no matter how much or how little sleep I get while my wonderful, loving, beautiful, creative, independant, powerful black...no Black Woman of a wife, is a bit of a grumpy-gus in the mornings, no matter the amount of sleep achieved. I'm just waiting for the one that says...

#442 - My husband is so cheery in the morning, even though Im Not a morning person. Next time he tries to sing to me in the car, or tell me one of his ridiculously intricate, zany ideas about cyborg dogs ruling the earth, I'm going...glue his buttcheeks together...

Hopefully it will never happen.

*hides the superglue*


Anonymous said...

#343--I feel the same way many times. Please don't ask if its ok to stay after work and play sports with the guys...go for it. Don't make me go to every outing with your buddies too, please go by yourself sometimes. Really its ok to be apart from me!!!

Anonymous said...

i wish so many women would stop itching about not getting enough/good enough sex. maybe you are part of the problem. ever thought of that or do you just like blaming other people for things that you might have something to do with. suck it up, stop your bitching whiners.

Anonymous said...

Hahaha....gotta love the hubby's post...

Awesome Mom said...

My husband is so #350. I hate it!

Anonymous said...

Why would anyone who is tired of hearing women bitch about anything be here? If ya can't stand the heat.....

Anonymous said...

Anon husband, or possible mistress to a married man, who is bitching that women are bitching about their sex life:

Take it from me. My husband has NEVER lasted more than 1 minute in the twenty years we've been together. He always has to do other stuff to "help" me, and that's if he's in the mood to do that. I have tried every trick in the book and nothing works. It's not me. It's him.

Anonymous said...

#347 - Yes, my parents are thundering fucking morons. However, they are the only parents I have - I don't have wonderful (supportive) parents like yours. I wish they were.

Yes, I know that I am not 'normal'... I always thought I was, but alas and alack. I do promise to make an effort towards patience when you show me places where I need improvement.

I love you, and sometimes (kind of a lot) feel that I don't deserve a woman as wonderful as you in my life.

Anonymous said...

Okay, I see what is going on here. Can't handle the truth, huh? I see a post had to be deleted from August 2nd and I think the jilted, insecure, narcissistic, selfish, pussy, mean, absolutely clueless, and idiotic should not actually bother to comment. It just shows how absolutely immature you are not to mention that you have extreme difficulty living in reality. If it strikes a chord so perfectly maybe you shouldn't get angry. Maybe you should step back, look at your relationship and WONDER IF ANY OF THESE POSTS ARE ABOUT YOU! And maybe if they could be about you, you oughtta do something to make it better! And Yes! I am talking about the men who feel the need to post here negatively and pessimistically.

Anonymous said...

aeshema the fury's comment cracked me up. I hope the superglue thing never happens as well, you seem like a nice guy. :-D

Anonymous said...

If aeshema the fury was my man, I wouldn't be here!! I think your butt is safe sweetie!

Anonymous said...

aeshema the fury made me laugh, I hope more husbands will come out of hiding and post comments for us!

Anonymous said...

#347 - ditto. Except I'm fortunate in that my husband really is normal. I still can't figure out how.

kevin black said...

Dear 346,

By your own admission, your husband spends a full half-hour every morning giving you an orgasm. Now, please be a good girl, get the Comet and wipe it off the bathroom counter.


Anonymous said...

Dear Kevin,

Read it again. My husband spends 30 minutes every evening giving HIMSELF an orgasm. I can't figure out why it takes 30 minutes since it only takes 3 minutes for him to have one with me.

Oh, and clean it up yourself, Babe.


Anonymous said...

Kevin, you sad douche. why are you even on this website. you feel the need to read every confession and torment women here because in reality you are the weak little pussy-boy noone even looks at when they walk by your 2x2 cubicle next to the men's room, you geek. Now go get me a coffee, bitch.