Monday, March 30, 2009

True Wife Confessions 286 Intel

Confession #2851

I wish my husband would die in a car accident so I could get my paycheck already. There. I said it. Its the truth and I don't care how painful it is!

Confession #2852

I love you so much it hurts. I cherish every moment we spend together. As cliche as it sounds you are my best friend. I am so lucky to have you in my life. I may not always show it but you mean everything to me :) Thank you for being my husband

Confession #2853

You say that you want more children, that you love them and are really good with them.

Well, you’re not. And you and I will never have any more.

You can’t be bothered to help with homework. I usually attend school functions by myself because you are “busy” (aka playing computer games). I buy him Christmas and birthday presents because if I left it to you he would not get anything. I sit with him when he’s sick and comfort him when he’s sad. He talks to me about anything and everything because I actually listen. When it comes to our son I do everything.

You know nothing about him. You don’t know what he’s allergic to, who his friends are, who his teacher is or even what his favorite color is. Bellowing orders from your office is not effective parenting.

I just think it is a bit ironic that the woman who in the beginning never wanted children is a better parent than the man who wanted lots of children.

Confession #2854

my husband came home 4 hours late. i look at his phone. i see a picture of his penis and he had a hard on when he took it at work. i will like to know some info about it. I'm thinking that he is cheating. can you tell me something?

Confession #2855

Let me just say that you are wonderful. I am so grateful to have met you. You completely saved me from a-hole after a-hole. You're my best friend, a wonderful father, an excellent provider, a devoted husband, and a fantastic lover. I love you to the bottom and depth of my soul. It's been the greatest 18 years of my life and I would not trade you for George Clooney. I am now and forever yours as you are the best man I have ever known. We have a beautiful child and life is as good as it should ever be.

Confession #2856

I love that you took a Friday off so we could reconnect. Yes, we had fabulous sex, but more than that - we swept away the stress of the past month and lay in bed, laughing and kissing and simply being together. This is why you are MY man.

Confession #2857

Well so I did some nosing around and check some phone records and see a ton of strange numbers on there. There are all girls when I call to find out who they are. I don't ask him because of the fear that something is going on. I don't want to start another huge fight. I just want some dam honesty in our relationship. I don't know how to approach the issue anymore. We have talked about it before about the female friends that he has that he talks to and how I don't talk to male friends because it bothers him but he doesn't do the same for me. I just don't know what to do.

Confession #2858

Why can't you come look at the bathroom I just painted, but I can look at the trailer you built? It drives me crazy! I am doing some thing for us the house, you are doing something for yourself. All I want is an acknowledgment. Maybe I expect too much... yeah right...

Confession #2859

When you listen to me - and laugh at my jokes - I fall in love with you over and over again.

Confession #2860

I know you are married. And you love your husband. In fact, I love your husband - he is such a great guy, funny, smart, sometimes a little selfish but overall, really a good person. One of my closest friends. But I can't stop thinking about what happened between us or when it will happen again. I know he claims not to care because I'm a woman, but I still feel like we have to be discreet. And it makes me feel like my veins are on fire. My heart sort of leaps when you walk into a room. I know this is going to end badly and we might end up damaging our friendship and work relationship but I sort of don't care. Stop being so damn sexy and maybe I will be able to think about something else.

Monday, March 23, 2009

True Wife Confessions E-Lev-En

Confession #101

Your inane, incessant questions are not only annoying to me, but also to
your children. I have coached them into just nodding and responding with, "I
have no idea." Shut up, already.

Confession #102

I hate you when you ask the question, "What's for dinner?" It makes me want
to punch you in the mouth. Why should it matter? You are going to eat it,
whatever it is, because you know that it would be a cold day in hell before
you cooked your own dinner or missed a meal.

Confession #103

It was really not fun when your dad came to visit and, instead of "Hello", the first thing he said to me was "What's for dinner?", at 9 pm, as I was just stepping in after a day of work, school and being pregnant. Did I mention I hate him?

Confession #104

Since I have to drive you to work and pick you up (as you refuse to get a driver's license while we are overseas), and since your workday starts at varying times, and since sometimes you want to get to work earlier than other times, when I ask what time you want to leave the house, tell me what time we want to LEAVE THE F*CKING HOUSE, not what time you are expected to report for duty. If I say "what time do you want to LEAVE tomorrow morning?" and you say "7:00," don't freak out on me at 5:45am when you are ready to leave for the 15 minute drive to work and I'm not even dressed yet.

Confession #105

If you want help, Ask for help. Staring at me from across the room does not communicate that you need help. I don't read your mind. I don't even WANT to read your mind. Open you mouth and say "Can you help me?" The child gets it, you should too.

Confession #106

If I work all day and you've played video games all day, and I come home and cook dinner, and you say "leave the dishes, I'll get them" and then they are still in the sink when I start trying to cook breakfast, and you say "I'll do the dishes after breakfast," don't be surprised if I'm slamming around and washing dishes and being curt with you. I can't make your damn breakfast if the pan I need is still dirty and in the sink under a pile of dinner dishes.

Confession #107

Do not ask me questions when I am half asleep and then act surprised when I get pissy about them. I was ALMOST asleep. Now I am not. I am not happy. If you see me in the "International position for being asleep" I suggest you leave me alone.

Confession #108

Giving me "the look" at bedtime isn't ever going to put me in the mood. I get up at dawn after going to bed at 11 p.m., then spend all day trying to get work done while our kids tug at me, demanding my time and attention. Then you come home and want something from me as well. Want to know the most effective foreplay in the world? You cleaning up after dinner, feeding the dogs, bathing the kids, picking up the their mess and putting the them to bed instead of me doing it.

Confession #109

Dear husband, I am so tired & sleepy by the time you get home from work
around 11:30 at night, I really wish you'd just go to bed when you get
home, and go to sleep instead of turning on that damn television and
letting it blare to all hours of the night and early morning.

Don't you know a girl needs her beauty sleep and believe me honey, it
wouldn't hurt you to get a little of it too, you're starting to get bags
under your eyes and I've noticed a bit of yawning when I wake you up for
work at 4:00 in the morning. Please sugar face, honey bunch... just keep
the damn television OFF!

Confession #110

The largest part of your ego, personality, and relationship with others is based on the knowledge that you are “hung”. If you ever lost your penis, you would probably cease to exist.
And I hate having sex with you because it hurts.

Monday, March 16, 2009

True Wife Confession Base 10

Confession #091

I am still having a hard time forgiving you for having what I consider
to be an emotional affair with your old coworker. The fact that you don't
think there was anything wrong with it (and it was me being too sensitive)
doesn't help. It's turned me into the cell phone checking, email snooping
wife I never wanted to be.

Confession #092

I hate when people ask us if/when we are having more kids. I tell them "I don't know" even though I know the answer is "never." Sure, I'd love to have another child, give our daughter a sibling, and quite possibly give you a son to carry on your family name. But I know our marriage would not survive. More specifically, I would not survive as your wife knowing again you'll be lazy, selfish, and unhelpful. Congratulations, Fun Daddy, your family name ends with you

Confession #093

I am in love with someone else.

Confession #094

I purposefully waited until your butt touched the chair before asking you to get me something to drink because you seem to do it to me all the time. Didn't like it very much did ya?

Confession #095

No matter what anyone says ... an IOU is not a birthday gift or a mother's day gift. It is a piece of paper that means nothing - especially if you don't follow through

Confession #096

If you text me again asking me to transfer money to your account so you can
buy shit for yourself, I will throw away your cell phone.

Confession #097

I truly, truly hate that every time you think you are paying me a compliment
you end it with a but....dinner was good, but... You look nice, but....
You are an asshole. No but.

Confession #098

I hate how you complained that you had to do the dishes again last
night. I am eight months pregnant with your first born child and you
will never understand how I'm feeling right now.

Confession #099

You are the LAZIEST of lovers. You lay there on your back and do nothing. You used to do magical things with your fingers - what happened? My signal for sex is an arm around my neck. Gross. You have no clue how hard I can orgasm if you would get off your fat ass

Confession #100

I resent paying for Head and Shoulders shampoo so much that I have been
buying generic shampoo and putting it into the same Head and Shoulders
bottle for over two years. Honey, you're bald and you don't need shampoo
anymore. You especially don't need one that controls dandruff. You have
more hair on your ass than you do on your head and you use soap on your ass.
Enough already!

Monday, March 09, 2009

True Wife Confessions 285 Humanities

Confession #2841

My life is completely fucked up. I have just been through a terrible trauma and what do I get? You telling me that your sister is more important then me to you. And I cant believe you have resorted to name calling. How did I get here? I thought I was marrying someone who loved me and was prince charming. You wont fuck me, its driving me crazy. Yes I have put on a few lbs since we met, but for fucking crying out loud Im still wearing a size 8! I feel so alone. That guy that I used to see everyday was the bright spot in my day. He was so good looking, and just my type. Bastard is devoted to his wife so he wont cheat, I know cause I tried to get with him. I have tried to tell you but you wont listen, if you wont give me what I want in bed I am going to find some big hunky guy that does p90x to give it to me good! Cause I need it! Ugh. What happened to that guy that couldn’t keep his hands off of me and thought I was the sexiest thing around. Remember him? He was horny all the time, I want him back! I understand people that cheat now, I never did before. I promise you that I will be married to you until the day I die, but I will probably have an affair or two….I just need a lot of male attention. I would be more than happy if it came from you, but you wont give me any attention. Wanna know how I remember the day our child was conceived? Because that day we woke up early for sex and it was really good, then on my way out the door you whistled at me. Made me feel like a million bucks all day. Why cant you do that all the time?! Dammit! I do that for you, I am always checking out your ass cause hot damn you have a great body and a spectacular ass….I want you just thinking about it. But of course I will get nothing cause you are too tired or have a cold or have a headache tonight. If you only knew how many times I have watched the p90x infomercials and……of course you wouldn’t know cause you sleep in the guest room everynight. Come to bed at the same time I do everynight and I'll rock your socks off. Wow, did I ever get off the topic here, I came here to complain about my sil but the post took a different direction…..she's a selfish bitch and her actions over the last 2 weeks have shown me her true colors. She cant even be bothered to give me a quick email to check on me to make sure Im ok. I thought we were friends and almost sisters, but I guess not. Of course this is the same woman that told me a few years ago that if it werent for my child her and the rest of the family would never want to see me again..guess I should have put the pieces together then….

Confession #2842

I don't know if its your or these pregnancy hormones, but you make me feel absolutely miserable. I mean some moments I honestly believe I HATE you. I want to scream and yell and throw things at you. But instead I go sit alone and cry and think if we made a mistake to have this baby. I feel so pathetic when our 9 year old son comes and hugs me and tells me that its ok and you sit on your lazy ass and watch tv with the damn dog. Its not his job and I feel like a bad mom because he knows this happens even when I try to hide it. Its funny how you can turn this all around to be my fault.What have I done.

Confession #2843

I can't believe that after almost 17 years, I can still love him the same, maybe because I never stopped loving him.I t was like we had never been apart a single day of our lives.Spending those 6 days with him were amazing and yes completely selfish of me. But I have dedicated my life to you and the children for the last 16 years and never once have I been selfish its' always been about what you want and need. I relive each and every moment them everyday in my mind. I can't for us to have our happily ever after. I am leaving you at the beginning of next year, He understands that it has to be on my terms, when I leave I am not taking a damn thing with me, it is going to be a fresh start for me and the children

Confession #2844

When I was 18, I met a married man. He seemed to be nice, mannerable, helping me out--I was new to the military, he had been in the game for several years. Young and naive as I was, I didn't know that this man's being nice to me was to recruit a swing partner for him and his wife. Having been badly abused all my life, I was starved for love, starved for any form of affection, and I took it and ran with it, even though dealing with another woman on that level had never appealed to me at all before this. This went on for two years. I broke away from it, never looked back. That was twelve years ago.

Since both our jobs in the service was personnel records, he managed to find me after I'd gotten out of the service--he remained in. You can't be friends with someone you've once slept with--they'll always want it again, even if you don't. And I'll be damned, he sure tried. However, I had grown up in that time, knowing that if you truly LOVE someone like you say, number one you wouldn't cheat on your spouse, or make promises you don't intend to keep to hold onto a young, naive girl.

Now I'm getting married myself to a wonderful man here later on this year. Needless to say, I've been being stalked by the same jerk from the service. I AM NOT that naive and dumb 18 year old girl anymore. I'm 31, almost, and happy with the man I have. He treats me like a queen, gives me everything I want--the type of love you read about, but seldom find. I am NOT giving that up to go back to the bullstuff I left in the service. I refuse to allow my husband to invite others to our bed, like his current wife does--he even got a child from the current swing buddy they have! Do you honestly think I want to go through that?! Hell no! I LIKE being the center of my fiancee's world. I am his ONLY woman, and he is my ONLY man. I love him, and will walk through fire for him, and do anything to keep him. I'm not giving that up, to go back and visit a shameful part in my life because YOU can't let go. I'm not doing it.

PLEASE STOP TRYING TO FIND ME. I DON'T WANT YOU. PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE. You are NOT going to snatch my happiness away from me. You are NOT going to ruin my future marriage. I was a fool once before. I won't be that fool again.

Confession #2845

Yea, I can do everything you think I should be able to and more. But yes, it's easier with your help. You whine when I ask you for help and then wonder why I don't ask you for help. hmmm

Confession #2846

Well, I don't know about you, but when someone calls me a moron because he is frustrated he didn't find the registration to the car in the place I said it was, it doesn't help to put me in the mood. I don't know, is it just me???? LOL Seriously, it's called think before you speak, idiot.
Love??? Me

Confession #2847

I know you are lying to me about our money situation.

Confession #2848

Do you think it is a coincidence that you run off to Yoga for 6 p.m .... just when the hellish triangle of dinner, homework and evening meltdowns occur? Especially when I know of at least three other classes at the same studio at different times you could attend. But No. Always the 6 o clock class. Your selfishness amazes me.

Confession #2849

To the women of the Ohio Valley - Did you get an unexpected bouquet of lovely red roses for Valentines Day - something your partner would NEVER have bought for you and was completely unexpected? Well, that is because he stole them off of my grandmothers grave. We buried her on Feb 13th, and when my mom went back on the 14th, the three dozen roses in the arrangement were gone - plucked out. All I can say is that if this sounds like your guy, don't marry him. Please.

Confession #2850

We barely speak most days. We almost never sleep in the same bed. The sex - if we have it - is at your insistence because I have no interest in you sexually. I just want you to be done as soon as possible. Your irrational anger at small things has killed any feeling I ever had. I have endured this for nearly 20 years, and you have exhausted me. On the day of our wedding I would have never believed that I could feel nothing but irritation towards you. I loved you so much. This is what all of these small slights and hurtful words, threats and looks have led to. I don't love you anymore.

Monday, March 02, 2009

True Wife Confessions 284 Poetic Licenses

Confession #2831

this weekend was everything I wanted and more. As I told you before I went to see you, my relationship with the husband is not all that great we are friendly but over friendly to each other, the whole time I was with you he called a total of 4 times.
I am so unhappy by his side, and with you, I am complete. I have decided to move back home, but I have to do it on my conditions, I will not take a dime from him.

THANK YOU AMOR for this weekend it was the best but I know that the rest of our lives will be even better

Confession #2832

I never expected that falling out of love would be so fucking painful. It isn't as if we didn't see it coming. Two decades we have been together and the indifference of that past 4 years has simply grown. I thought that the feeling of just not wanting to be with you, not wanting you to touch me WAS the painful part. No. It seems that for the past two weeks, the pain I am feeling must be part of the ending of our marriage. I feel like I am hacking off a limb to save the rest of me. There will be no dramatic fight to end it between us. Just me trying to find enough energy to do the humane thing.

Confession #2833

I've finally gotten an offer for a better job - a much, much better job, with a large raise, better working conditions, and a chance to advance - and I'm scared to death to take it. The main reason is because of you. We've worked the same hours since we've been together - five years - which allows us to spend lots of time together. Now we will have at least 2 or 3 fewer hours per day to be together, which I hate. I think you fee the same way I do - you want me to take the job, but you don't like the change in schedule. It also means our daughter will be at daycare an extra hour every day, which makes me feel extremely sad and guilty. I'm afraid that mine and your relationship will suffer, and that our daughter will suffer as well. So what do I do? Take the job and pray everything goes well and we all adjust? Or stay in this dead-end, low-paying job I have now?

Confession #2834

I made out with a guy I work with this weekend. I wanted to do alot more than that with him, but didn't. I secretly wanted to fuck you yesterday just so I could pretend it was him.

Confession #2835

Dearest co-irker,

I am done with you stealing my ideas, taking credit for my work and trying to make me look bad in front of our principal. As a result, I will now be spitting in your coffee mug and water bottle every available chance I get. While I realize this is neither mature nor professional, it makes me feel so much better. This may be the only time in my life that I hope I get a horrendous stomach bug so that I can pass it on to you.


Your T.A.

Confession #2836

At first, it was good but now it just sucks. I wait a month for you to come home from work and when you do, it is all about you! I hate it when your fat ass climbs on top of me! Your panting sickens me! You come home from work and when you do you stay gone and visit and help everyone else. You say you are outside “working” but for some reason nothing ever gets done! Why is it that I do everything to get your attention and I am always doing what YOU want to do just so I can spend time with you! I take a bath every night, shave my legs and get my hair done to look good for you. I worry if I turn you on like those sluts in your porn videos! When it comes to sex, you expect me to suck your dick and for me to get on top to do all the work! You do nothing for me! I just moan and fake it so I can just get it over. Have I ever had an orgasm with you??? You were drunk for all of our marriage and now that you have “quit” for 6 months, you expect me to fall deep in love with you again…. Ha, that is a load of bullshit! Everything that you put me through with your drunken ass is ridiculous. Well who cares that you finally quit. How about that time you knocked me around when you were drunk or all the times you had sex with me when you were so drunk you couldn’t even find where to put it or get it up! Yes, I know… you have changed and you are now sober and you are a great father! Our kids always come first but I am alone! ! We have two beautiful kids that need their father so I stay. I am sorry for my feeling. You still do not see me! You have pushed me aside for too long. If you have to pick up around the house, you bitch and whine that you work and make the money. I may not work for money but keeping house and two kids IS work asshole! You try cooking, cleaning, ironing, changing diapers, and driving our son to soccer practice everyday! Why can’t you just pay attention to me as much as you do everything and everyone else! I need to have an orgasm with a man that wants to have sex with me! I want to fuck someone else SOOOO bad and I have and I am sorry! He makes me feel beautiful. He looks at me like I am perfect and he wants me! He actually wants to pleasure me and touch me, and NOT only spit on his dick to get it wet so he can get off. As you have pointed out before I have no money so how would I take care of myself! You stupid bastard! I actually do love you deep down and I can’t leave you can I? Damn why can’t it just be different!

Confession #2837

Dear Husband,

So I come yesterday and things are weird around the house, shelve in closet total mess, my drawers are messed up, your drawer is falling out of track. Then when I ask you about all these things you say you have no idea. You are the only one home besides the animals. You were looking for something and won’t tell me what. It totally pissed me off to no end that you won’t just admit that you were. Not to mention we haven’t had sex in two weeks from today. I need it, I want it. What is wrong with you stupid? Don’t you understand that after like day four of now having I am become a bitch because I want it that much. SO….. all the little annoying things you do become that much more annoying to me and I want to kill you. Get a clue and figure out what your wife wants before you drive her totally crazy.

The ocd bitch

Confession #2838

Our son couldn't sit in your lap at the circus, because your belly was sitting there instead. He sat in my lap instead. He had his own seat... he just wanted to snuggle close for a minute and share his excitement and wonder with someone. He was practically thrumming with the overwhelming joy of a four-year-old at his first circus, and I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tight while I cried for you, very quietly, into his hair. You missed that, and you will never have another chance. I know the decades of overeating, overcompensating, and neglect of self have not given you the joy that that moment would have...but I don't know how to help you let it go. I feel so much sadness and despair for you, but I don't know how to help. I think you're the only one who can fix it. Until you can, it will sit in your lap instead of your little boy.

Confession #2839

My beloved child asked me...Mom just how much longer are you going to put up with this.....I told her I didn't know.

When I first met you, you were so healthy and robust,loving and caring, then things happened and you got sick, I moved my family to a new city and proceeded to care for you regardless how ugly it got, you lost your limb and I still stuck by you, I explained that love was unconditional,and I was going to love you regardless, We have been together for a few years now and you have turned 180 degrees, Your moods change, you started getting angry over little thing,you instigate arguments with me or the kids, You know these kids are awesome! they all make straight A's they are very generous with their time and their heart,they aren't hanging out in the streets,they aren't in any gangs, they even have their futures planned, but you look for their faults,you dig until you find something they forgot to do or left out, its just so sad.
Your family welcomed us with open arms and included us in all the family activities when we first arrived, I felt so blessed to have a new family, it was wonderful,then when we started arguing and fighting you started complaining to your family and now they treat us differently, no more family activities, we are pretty much ignored, I miss our get together's, I miss seeing them, I know you call them when you feel I have somehow mistreated you, But you know some women can only take so much and now I'm tired, I'm tired of our arguments, I'm tired of having to defend my kids with you, I'm tired of you calling me selfish and ugly, if things don't change and you start treating me and the kids differently its all going to end, I'm going to ask you to leave, and not come back .Maybe I am better off by myself with my kids, I'll keep going to work, I'll keep coming home and cooking dinner,I'll keep doing the laundry and keeping the house clean, but this time it will be for me and the kids and not for you. Maybe you won't care if you lose your "family" but the kids have grown to love you and they are going to care, they are going to miss you, and they are going to hurt, and it will be because of you.

Confession #2840

Hey.....we need to talk. Here we are,married 23 years,
two great kids away at college,this should be OUR time
to enjoy each other........but you don't even notice me.
Your too busy with Nascar and football, hockey, and
even GOLF for crying outloud !!! That and most of
a twelve pack everynite. When I told you I needed a
little company, you started bringing your idiot friends
home to drink beer and watch the game.

So I started going upstairs to read and play on the
computer. I found all of your porn.....Why won't
you do these things with your wife?? I come down-
stairs tuesday. and your helper is on the couch. He
lost his license, and you are too drunk to take him
home after monday night football. It was driving
me crazy,but you kept bringing him.
Well,I don't care if Carl spends Monday nights
on our couch anymore.Because when you stagger
up to bed and start snoring,I sneak down to the
family room and suck his cock. He don't mind at all........
I've done this 8 or 9 times !!! You don't have a
I bought you a fishing pole for your birthday.The
next day, you bring Carl home to see it. While I
was doing the dishes, you went to the basement
to play with your pole.I got on my knees in front
of the sink and played with Carl's......when you
called up the steps for him to bring you a beer,
he said, 'hold on, I'm coming....' And he was....
The next time you pass out on the recliner,
I am goin to let him fuck me.....right in front
you.....Maybe THEN you'll wake up and pay
attention to me.........