Tuesday, June 30, 2009

True Wife Confessions 294 Facebook friends

Confession #2931

On the day we were married in Niagara Falls, you held an umbrella over me while I took pictures of the edge of the waterfall. It wasn't until the thunder boomed that I realized that there was a thunderstorm on top of the mist coming from the falls... you stood there, getting completely soaked, keeping myself and the camera dry and didn't say a word because you know how much I love taking pictures and this was my last chance before we left and I would have stopped if I knew you were getting wet.... thank you my love, for being extraordinary on that day and every other day.

Confession #2932

I filed for divorce. You know it and even had to sign papers that you are aware of it. So, why are you acting like it isn’t happening? You have suddenly decided that you are going to be a super dad and an amazing husband. Sorry honey, after six years, I just don’t believe you are capable. Sure you’ll do well for a week or two or maybe even a month, but you’ll go right back to your drinking. This time, I am TRULY done. The only reason that I am not pointing this out to you is that your denial makes the divorce process easier. Plus, it is nice to actually get help with the kids.

Confession #2933

I don't understand why I am not enough for you, why you need to watch
porn. You say you are bisexual and you're definitely not gay; I have
no problem with homosexuality or bisexuality but I am terrified that
one day you will wake up and realize you need to be with a man. And
that will kill me. We have great, regular sex. Can't you get rid of
the porn and show me that I am enough to fulfill you? You say that you
should be allowed to embrace your sexuality and that it hurts you that
I can't love that part of you, but you don't seem to understand that I
feel invisible in our relationship when I have to acknowledge that you
watch porn and masturbate. It reinforces all my fear and insecurity.
You talk and talk about how this has no bearing on how you feel about
me, you love me, you want to be with me. But you won't put that into
action by doing this one thing that I ask of you, by giving up
pornography. It is a horrible, nagging feeling. The rest of our
marriage is so wonderful; I hate that this cloud hangs over us. I
worry it will be our undoing.

Confession #2934

When you try to handle something on your own, like a job application
or renewing your mother's Green Card, the number of questions you ask
me makes me wonder: how on earth do you get anything done at work? DO
you get anything done at work?

Confession #2935

We committed ourselves to one another a long time ago...18 years. You are my soulmate and I know that you feel the same way about me. Until death do us part baby.

Confession #2936

All I want to do is sell this house and get out of here before you blow it for me. I am afraid you are going to have another episode or self implode, and I will be here with the kids. Moving closer to my family will help me to feel safe, soooooo lets just price the house right, not like you have a chalet, and get me the fuck out of here.
thank you

Confession #2937

I am so proud of you for taking a chance and going back to school. Yes, I know you won't have much free time or spare cash for a while, but we're keeping our eye on a better life. You're daring to think that life is more than slaving away at a soul-sucking job in return for a lousy pay-check. I see how tired you are after working in the morning, studying in the afternoon, and then going to school at night, and then notice that you washed the dishes and swept the floor before you left. You're awesome. Totally a "keeper". Good luck, sweetie. I'll be there when you need me.

Confession #2938

I love you very much, you are the father of my child, and I would love to be with you for the rest of my life. However I need you to decide what you want, and I mean what you really really want. Not what you think you have to do, not what other people think you should do, but what will make you happy. If that means being a family and doing the things that familys do then great, that would make me beyond happy. If that means spending all your time with your friends or at the gym then so be it, I can handle that too.
You also need to learn how to express yourself. How do you think it makes me feel when I can see the wheels turning and you having to work just to tell me I look nice? Or the holidays I have to buy my own gift or wait until the day has passed to get it? Being away for 4 weeks and you not saying once that you missed me without provocation? Having you mumble something because you panic when I say I love you?
It doesn't feel good and honestly I am done, I knew that trying to make this work could turn out really badly for me, that you didn't feel as strongly as I did, and that I had to try anyway. I've believed that you can be the father and man I deserve but it's time for you to prove it.

Confession #2939

I hate my sister. I've never admitted it, even to myself, but I think I've hated her for a long time. We never got along growing up, but that's normal, right? Now we're grown....I married a black man (I'm white) against my family's wishes. Before I told any of them, I told my sister. I thought that if she could stand behind me, then maybe eventually the rest of them would come around. I told her that he was the first man I'd ever been in love with, the first man I'd ever loved period. She said, "You should do what you want to do. You should be happy." I'd have married him anyway, even if she had said she would never speak to me again. But just her saying that gave me some comfort because the rest of my family basically disowned me once I told them. My brother hasn't spoken to me in four years, and we were best friends for so long. Anyway, my sister got married about a year and a half later. She told another family member that I could attend her wedding, but I could not bring my husband or baby daughter with me. I was shocked, and really hurt. What makes her so fantastic that she is ashamed of me and my family? My husband is a great man - he works hard and is a great father - and I have the cutest daughter in the world. So I didn't bother to attend her wedding. If my family isn't good enough for her, then neither am I. Later I saw she had posted on her myspace page that the family had given her all of my great-grandmother's hand-written recipes and cookbooks (which they all knew my grandma had promised to give to me). She wrote about how touched she was to get them. I bet she was. Her and her ugly husband are fucking on the antique bed that my other grandmother gave me as well. I don't really care about all that - it's just stuff. It's just the principle behind it. But now my sister can't seem to get pregnant. She miscarried twins and she's been trying to get pregnant now for three years. As horrible as it sounds, I secretly smile every time I hear that another pregnancy test came up negative. I hope she never has a child. I do. Maybe it's karma for thinking that my family isn't good enough. Maybe a person like that doesn't have any business raising a child anyway. I hope her uterus rots and falls out.

Confession #2940

It hurts me to see you in such pain - your marriage is ending, and it hurts. But I will not let me be your distraction, nor your promise of something else. As much as I want to comfort you, you have to go through this hurt alone. When you are through the other side then we can make a life together. Freely.

Monday, June 29, 2009

Please, Don't Friend me.....

Some friends and I were sharing stories - things that happen in our day to day lives....and One friend shared this Story about being rejected as a friend on Facebook.

And so, another Blog is Born.

Please Don't Friend Me

Its the place where you can share the awkward moments of the age of social networking.

Like True Wife, submissions to Please Don't Friend me will be anonymous.

You can email them at pleasedontfriendme@gmail.com

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

True Wife Confessions Sweet Sixteen

Confession #151

hey, look, you cheated on me when we were dating. Do I forgive you, 4 years later? No. Did I forget? No. Do I hate you for it? Yes. Do I wonder why I married you? Yes. And then the answer strikes me. I married you because it's what people expected. However, if you cheat on me again, I will cut your penis off. fucker.

Confession #152

Yes, they really are making fun of you because of what you chose to say or do.

Confession #153

When I tell you yelling at a two year old doesn't work why do you insist upon an hour long explanation why? And then still not believe me? I am with these kids all day long every day and you are hardly here. You overreact. You think the kids should act like your coworkers. THEY ARE KIDS. THEY ACT LIKE KIDS! Don't treat them like they are doing it just to piss you off.

Confession #154

When you tweek my nipples for 3 seconds flat as if you're adjusting the
burner on your manly gas grill, do NOT ask me if I'm ready yet. I will
always respond, "not if you want it wet!" It's offensive that you spend
more effort on working up a good bowel movement than you do on foreplay

Confession #155

Your friends not coming around anymore has nothing to do with me like you say. Most all of them still stop by to chat when you're not home. They don't like how you treat them. And by the way, you're losing me friends and embarrassing me.

Confession #156

Yes, you have a job. Get over it. Everyone has to work. Either change careers or stop whining and complaining. Guess what? Everyone you're complaining to just came from work too!

Confession #157

During the last "Vomiting vacation", you cleaned up all the vomit in the bedroom while I comforted the child. That meant a alot to me. It really did.

Confession #158

I hate the fact that you're a drunk, , you spend your money on booze and I have to pay the bills. I hate having to force you to pay the bills.

We cant rely on your mommy forever you know. What are you going to do when she dies?
I hate that you lie to me and say you get our son up at 7:30 am when I know you don't get him up til about 9 ( geeze I wonder why he won't go to bed at night!) and I can't do anything about it because I am at work by that time. Why because I work at a really sucky job that I hate because you are to lazy and irresponsible to get a real job ( and keep it) and take care of your family.
Why do I pay most of the bills. Didn't you brag about how your wife would never work how you want your wife to stay home and take care of the kids and have dinner on the table as soon as you walk through the door ( yes that was me laughing )
Why do you think waving your member in my face is a turn on ( eww) and that asking me to look is the way to initiate sex? Then you just lay there. What you think your so wonderful that you don't even have to move and I am turned on?
Why am I with you again.

Confession #159

You smashed my nose in a drunken rage. You scared the shit out of me and
your precious, innocent daughter.

You have NO fucking idea how lucky you are to not be in jail right now. You
would be if I didn't need your money.

Welcome to life in the backseat, jackass. Life is never going to be the

Confession #160

You're everything I want,
You're everythign I need...
I want you to be my life consuming passion.
Everything my heart desires
I find it all in you, you're my true one and only.
Never let go of me for noone will love you as I do.

Monday, June 15, 2009

True Wife Confessions #15 -Spicy noodles with egg roll

Confession #141

I hate how you never clean up the bathroom sink. You leave hair all over it. You spit in it and don’t bother to rinse. Once, when you were being a jerk, I took your toothbrush and cheerfully cleaned the scum from the sink. Then I laughed on the inside when you told me how nice the sink looked. And I laughed even harder because you were brushing your teeth while you told me.

Confession #142

Dude, when you use the master bathroom with the door open without the fan on and your stench bubbles the paint on the walls? That's just disgusting. So when you emerge from your nightly shit and start to rub on me and breathe all heavy in my ear? I turn you down because you made our room reek and romance is the last thing on my mind, not because of the ailment du jour I pretend to have. A word or two of advice. Shut the door, turn on the fan, and Oust spray. You might get more action that way.

Confession #143

I wish you'd get some friends of your own so you didn't just sit around the house all weekend being bored.

Confession #144

It cracks me up how you've been on my ass for YEARS to work out and lose weight. Now that I have lost weight and work out almost every day? You don't. Does this mean I can start making noises about how much weight you've gained and how big your ass has gotten? Have some more ice cream, honey.

Confession #145

You asked me if I wanted to be a swinger four weeks after our son was born. what the fuck do you think the answer was going to be? bet you didn't think it was gonna be yes. why? because I think you watching me fuck someone else will break your heart as much as you have smashed mine in the past. besides, you are a lousy lover. always have been.

Confession #146

I am having an affair with someone that I meet. It is COMPLETELY about the sex. Quite honestly, I am getting a little bored with you and I needed a little something different. I am not planning on leaving you. I meet him during my lunch break for a quickie 2-3 times a week. He never complains and he doesn't whine when I don't call him or when I tell him I am too busy to meet him that day.

Confession #147

If I come home from work early because I don't feel good it's because I DON'T FEEL GOOD. It doesn't mean YOU get to take a three hour nap and I get to take care of the baby. It also doesn't mean you get to throw a temper trantrum because I fall asleep at 10:30 when I've been up since 5 a.m.

Confession #148

If I tell you I have started my period that morning, leave me alone. No, I don't want to have sex. No, I don't want to do ANYTHING, I just want to lie still and wait for the ibuprofen to work. Your best bet? Tip toe out and leave me alone with a book. Or offer me a candy bar.

Confession #149

Taking a shower once a week because you want to get laid does not make you attractive. Take a shower daily for more than three days and then we'll talk.

Confession #150

That time you took care of me after I had my wisdom teeth out? That was love. Changing the dressing in my mouth? True love. I can't tell you how much ground you made up in that week. I needed you and you came through. Plus you never complain about buying tampons. Yes, I'm noticing.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

True Wife Confessions 293 things you should know

Confession #2921

For the first few years of our marriage, I was desperately unhappy.

Last year, when I thought we were finally happy, you told me you didn't want to be married to me anymore. I felt like an idiot for not having seen this. And I felt betrayed, because you kept this secret for almost two years before you finally told me how you felt.

After 8 months of counseling, you decided we couldn't afford it anymore and we stopped going. You said things were better and you were leaning toward staying married.

On our anniversary, I asked you if you were happy or if you were still leaning toward divorce. You said you were still leaning toward divorce. That was a delightful slap in the face. But you still wanted to keep things going. You still wanted to try. I started hating you.

Today, I was downstairs and found your phone. I flipped it open and saw that, for the first time in all the years you've had a phone, it's password locked.

Seriously? What the fuck? I can't handle this anymore.

I'm terrified to be alone. I'm in the middle of studying for the bar exam. I have no job and no money. And all I can think of is getting a divorce.

Confession #2922

Thank you for making love to me in the backyard yesterday. You've known for quite some time that it was a fantasy of mine. There wasn't a cloud in the sky and the sun warmed our bodies. I laid on my back and looked you in the eye and fell deeper in love with you for it. Thank you for knowing what makes me happy and doing it so willingly.

Confession #2923

I bought you headphones for a reason. No jury will convict me when I
finally strangle you for playing the same three Boyz II Men songs over
and over again on You Tube.

Confession #2924

Yesterday was my birthday, I am 30 years old. I am the highschool student who was in forensics and band, never went to parties, and graduated from college with a 4.0 GPA. I have 2 children and have been married for 9 years. I have a good job, a good life, a good husband. I don't party, don't drink, don't smoke. For my birthday I wanted to do something I have never done before. I knew that before we were dating my husband had done it only once or twice, and I just wanted to be able to say I'd had the experience. That I had tried it. I only casually mentioned it to him, that I was just curious about what it felt like and he said he could probably get some if I really wanted to. That was the end of the conversation, I didn't really believe he could. And then he brought some home from work, I didn't even recognize what it was when he showed it to me, LOL. So last night, after the kids were in bed, we went out to the garage together. You should have seen us, neither one had a clue if we were doing it right. And then we had great sex and went to bed. I can't tell anyone, I would NEVER tell anyone, so I am sharing it anonymously with you internet. I am 30 years old and last night I smoked pot for the first time.

Confession #2925

I asked you to work on cleaning up the house while I was at work. In 5 hours, you washed 10 dishes. When I came home, in 2 hours I cleaned up all the kids toys, washed the other dishes you ignored, folded the laundry and put it away, vacuumed the house, and swept and mopped in the kitchen.

But I should be appreciative and impressed by everything you did, and it's not fair for me to be angry? Are you freaking kidding me?

Confession #2926

Today is one of the happiest days I've had in years. After several months of looking and negotiating, my brother bought me a house so that I can leave you. The closing is tomorrow. In 3 weeks and 3 days, I plan to take our daughter to my best friends house, then come home and tell you I want a divorce. I want to believe on some level that you know that it's coming. In reality though, you probably have no clue because you are truly that self involved.

Confession #2927

While reading TWC today I saw there is a Facebook page for it now. I so badly want to join, but I can't... it will start an argument. You always question everyone and everything I add to Facebook. You'd get unnecessarily angry. You'd wonder what I'm hiding from you and what I have to confess. I'd then probably lie just to try to ease your concerns and tell you that I have nothing to hide and I just read it for entertainment and end up removing myself from the group so that you didn't give me anymore shit about it. But you'll never know my real confession: you make me miserable and I want out of this marriage. TWC makes me feel like I'm not alone.

Confession #2928

I've been so unhappy for so long with you. You seem to just want to ignore it and pretend we can continue like this. We can't. Not without it destroying us both. I don't hate you. I kind of wish I did, then I could just be a bitch. I want a chance at happiness. We aren't happy and haven't been for a while. Living in some freakish limbo indefinitely is just going to make us hate each other. Soon as I am able to save up filing costs, I am filing for divorce. I know you know it is coming. I know you found the paper where I was figuring up what bills we had, what income we each have and who was going to get what. I know because it was not how I left it. Ironically after I found that paper left askew you tried to get more affectionate like that was going to fix things at this point. I've needed support. This was supposed to be a partnership, but it wasn't. Just constantly coming up and trying to rub my back or whatever is not gonna fix things. As a matter of fact most of the time I am fighting the urge to snap for you to get your hands off me and quit touching me.

Confession #2929

I know you love me. Will, I think so anyways...sometimes I am not sure. If you'd ever just look at me and tell me you love me for no reason at all (like, not because I say it first, or it is bedtime ), I'd know for sure...and then I wouldn't be so bitchy all the time

Confession #2930

If you had been willing to look at our issues together in the ten plus years I have asked, instead of waiting until I told you I was leaving and suddenly gaining insights about our interactions and relationship, you might not be sleeping in a separate bed and watching your wife establish her future life without you. It really is too little too late.

Monday, June 01, 2009

True Wife Confessions 292 Tablets

Confession #2911

First you woke my body up, and then you moved your way into my heart. You are my beloved.

Confession #2912

I was completely cool with your dad throwing a "Man Shower" while I was doing my baby shower when I thought it was just going to be you and the guys hanging out by the river, fishing and drinking a few beers. After talking with your dad and hearing how he was planning on making it into another bachelor party and trying to get you wasted, I had my concerns. I even asked your father to please not ply you with booze b/c a.) it's my baby shower and I would like it to be a nice, family day to celebrate the upcoming birth of our son and b.) my mom was staying with us and I didn't want to have to apologize for my tanked husband. I talked to you and told my concerns about my baby shower becoming an excuse for a raging beer-fueled party and, very specifically, asked you to NOT get completely hammered but to def have some drinks and have a good time. I even told you that I don't mind if you're drunk but didn't want you to be excessively drunk.

Well, that didn't happen. After driving not only yourself home but 2 of our friends, you come stumbling and slurring into our house (with my mom there), take a shower and pass out at 7:30. I go to check on you and catch you puking over the side of the bed into a trash can. I also later find that you have puked all over the toilet in our master bath and it is really not fun to be bending over cleaning up somebody else's puke at 8 months pregnant in the middle of the night. I am so angry and disappointed with you. I asked you not to get shithoused and you did so any way. And, even though you're a 28-year-old man and should be able to resist peer-pressure at this point, I am annoyed as hell with your dad too b/c he blatantly disrespected my wishes and thinks it's hilarious that you got wasted. I realize that this is how your family is since both your mom and sister got drunk AT my actual baby shower but you're usually not like that b/c if you were there is no way we would be married. I was so embarrassed having to apologize to my mom for my drunken husband. I cannot believe you disrespected me like that. My trust and respect for you took a big nosedive. It was supposed to be a special day and now I will remember my baby shower like this. I love you and always will but I really, REALLY do not like you right now.

Confession #2913

Well, it's started. The ball is rolling. I am not sure that I can stop it or if I even want to.

My secret crush, who has kept me motivated and content in my mind for the last year and a half, well he feels the same way about me. We have "flirted" in the past, but I just figured it was me, b/c I was miserable in my marriage. I just found out this weekend and I have spent the day filled with anxiety and butterflies.

We didn't do anything, and we promised we wouldn't. We know that the grass just looks greener. We like our lives in general, where we live, who we know, what we do. We just happen to really, really like each other too. The bummer for me is that I feel like I am in a window of life in which there is really no option to leave you. I wouldn't leave FOR him anyway, but to even daydream about it brings me down b/c it just isn't an option.

If you knew who he was, you'd die. He is funny and charming and sexy and respectful. Lighthearted and upbeat.....all the things you THINK you are, but aren't.

My biggest dilemma is that while we said we wouldn't act on this, in my heart, I can't wait to. I don't know if I should schedule our next double date or run for my life. My only regret so far is that I didn't lean over and kiss him this weekend when I had the chance. I am terrified that our moment has passed. I both look forward to and dread the next time we are all together.

So dear husband......thanks for refusing counseling and for refusing to talk about us for the last 3 years. Thanks for constantly criticizing me and tearing me down. Thanks for making me want nothing to do with you. At least I don't have to feel guilty about what I am feeling right now, which is simply desired, just as I am.

Confession #2914

I can see it in your eyes every night that I don't have sex with you. I would love to have sex, if you can get your hand off you dick long enough for me. Sometimes I am afraid I won't live up to the expectations you may have because of your masturbation. Oh yeah, I have heard and seen you and let me tell you, you like it. I can tell. So where does that leave me. And before some one says "jump on and help him out" let me just say, it doesn't turn me on. This is the behavior that gets you into trouble, remember......

Confession #2915

I love you. Crazily so. And I know you love me. But where is your desire? I read and hear about these randy men and frigid wives. The stereotypes abound but we are the opposite. I want you. I desire physical affection from you. I want you to want me. I want you to be unable to keep your hands off me. But you are disinterested in sex. I can't understand it. Is it me? Is there something I am missing? No matter how many other ways you show your love, I will feel rejected and unloved without this aspect of our relationship. Physical affection is my love language.

Confession #2916

i'm not married but sometimes i wish i was despite the fact that it would be a huge mistake. you are a terrible man. your son barely knows you, and he's not even OURS. i had a miscarriage soon after you had a baby with her, and you left me in the hospital all day, by myself dying emotionally and physically. 7 1/2 years we've been together, and you have a fiance AND another girlfriend. i hate that i can't leave you alone. you come by just when i'm at the end of my rope, finally thinking to myself i can maybe be with someone else....and toss me into a whirlwind of emotions. you put my body thru such extacy and are gone again. i hate that you do this, but hate myself more for letting you because i think i need you, and i'm still too scared to sleep with someone else. i hate that i bring this pain on myself because i know when you leave you are going to one of those other bitches. we were together first. everything you have become and actually accomplished has been with me. i stick by you thru the low points and try to build you back up. i cry over you almost every day, and none of it matters to you because you have those 2 fawning all over you.

you're making some of the hugest mistakes of your life. even your friends want to be with me and they all hate how i cry for you. you think you're on top right now, but you always come crashing down, but will i be here this time when you "need" me? i wonder if i will find the strength to move on before you come crashing thru the door again, tellin me it's me you want.

the weekend of your wedding i will be getting seriously fucked up. i wonder if i will hear from you. AFTER your wedding, i wonder if i will be able to go on....i wish i could just let go...

Confession #2917

I cheated on you with my coworker when we were engaged. We had really hot sex, oftentimes at work. I felt guilty about all of this -- and then you hit me. More than once. And since then, fucking him in the break room was the best thing I ever did.

Confession #2918

Thanks for your sympathy, even if it bears a striking resemblance to the general apathy you have towards my life and the things I do. God forbid you ever ask me about my day and then sit through me actually telling you without interrupting or starting to do something else while I talk. That actually might mean caring about someone more than you do yourself, and we can't have that! I really appreciate your total lack of concern for my feelings and opinions and especially cherish how you personalize all of our disagreements and lash out at me if I don't agree with you. It's delightful being married to a 30 year old man who has the relationship skills of a teenage boy. I love how you can never compromise, how you emotionally black mail me, and in especially stressful times, threaten to not participate in important events in my life all to make me do what you want. Thank you so much for being a hypocritical Christian, who says he believes in Jesus but then refuses to live a life that bears any resemblance to that. I look forward to the day when your cruel and petulant behavior shames me and the profession that I have chosen and causes my congregation to doubt me and my pastoral abilities. I look forward to the day when our children start to avoid you and your volcanic mood swings and when they start to ask if you love beer more than them. I look forward to all of the arguments we will have in the future about money because you are a spoiled child who refuses to consider fiscal responsibility or stewardship because they really want to eat out more than once a week. I had no idea that marriage could be so delightfully frustrating and soul crushing, but I have only you to thank for that. If we make it past five years, I think that even your mother will be surprised that you didn't manage to sabotage our relationship before then. Maybe they'll create protestant saints just to commemorate the hellish years that I spent catering to you and your outrageously childish behavior.

Confession #2919

I just don't know what do with you anymore. You don't want to have a physical affair but you won't let go of me either. You know how I feel, you acknowledge that we belong together but you will not leave what you confess is a bad marriage. I applaud you for trying to make things right but how much longer can you put us both through this? I'll keep meeting you at our appointed time, our time together, to talk, to just be together. You have made it clear that I am a big part of your life and you want me around always. However, please understand how much it hurts to watch you with someone else. There will be a breaking point where I may have to walk away. I hope that it will not have to come to that. You know I am ready to leave him with or without you. I need you, I want you and I love you, just take my hand and come with me. That's all I ask of you.

Confession #2920

I want to thank you for being the person that makes me laugh my ass off daily.
I want to thank you for the endless cups of tea.
I want to thank you for knowing it's your hair that clogs the drain and being embarrassed about it.
I want to thank you for loving my daughter.
I want to thank you for wanting to hold my hand.
I want to thank you for your patience with my ex.
I want to thank you for your ability to throw my mother for a loop.
I want to thank you for pointing out when I'm being over the top.
I want to thank you for still loving me when I give you the finger for pointing out I'm being over the top.
I want to thank you for playing.
I want to thank you for giving me back a sense of wonder

I love you... meet you by the swings.