Monday, August 31, 2009

True Wife Confessions 299 back to school cheers

Confessions # 2981

We've been having really great sex lately. But you know that, eh? ;)

Confessions # 2982

Thanks for letting me take the lead in anal sex this week - I know you were excited and I was too - but allowing me to go at my own pace just made it all the better for me and more likely that you will be treated to that more often!

Confessions # 2983

To my first love, I was an innocent and would have loved you beyond words, but you lost me to ..
Badboy, I never anticipated you in my life I grew up in a good catholic background, which was lost in poverty, but I loved you and fell in love when you said hello, it wasn't all romance far from it but, emotions made you the one I loved, I had your child to my expense and happiness. I soon realised my mistake and rectified it by hard work and isolation... I worked and told you to go, I was devasted, we sort of remained amicable as long as you knew where I was and what I was doing... I met someone else.. older and an adulterer, I had no idea but I never brought him in to my childs life... you moved on and had 2 kids and are happy. I met and lost along the way, I look at you and you know me better than anyone because I had to allow you in my life because of our child, otherwise you would have been a wasted love.. I made so many mistakes. My life isn't great my daughters father has a new girlfriend and 2 children, and my second love has 3 children and believe me with his track record many, many more children..

My confession with absolute shame is that I think about all the men every single day, I know each one affected my life and I try to overcome it daily but know they are cheaters..

Confessions # 2984

my love is deep for you! but yet i do horrible things to you. you may or may not know it but i have cheated on you many times and dont know if i can stop. i have a sickness, i always want more. im searching for an o.g. and when i find it then what.....?

Confessions # 2985

I’m married to a man that treats me well but the sex is blah as in one way and one way only. I have been talking to a friend and he has offered one night of no attachment sex. Do I cross the boundary line of what is right or see if the pasture is greener on the other side.

Confessions # 2986

I'm really glad that you quit smoking as its bad for your health and very stinky. I want you to be around and healthy as long as possible because I love you so very much. But secretly, I wish you would start again because when you don't are a complete asshole.

Confessions # 2987

I shave my hair "down there" with my husband's beard trimmer.

He has no idea.

Confessions # 2988

Sometimes I just want to feel important to you. Sometimes I just want you to ask about me. Your job is so stressful. Every day you come home so tired, stressed out, complaining. What about me? What about what I am thinking about? What about what I dream? What I want? How my business is going? It isn't all about you. You say you want to spend more time together. You say we have lost touch. But what do you do to fix that? Do you take an interest in what I am doing? What is going on with me? I just want to feel like I matter to you. And I need your words to tell me that. Not you making the money, taking the kids. I need you to talk to me. Take control and find out about me and what I like, what makes me tick. I love you, you are my best friend. But when all you do is stress about everything, even around here and make me feel like the hired help, I don't want to talk to you, let alone make love to you. When you ease up and relax, when you are cheerful, I want you so much more. I feel so down about myself. I need a hug sometimes. I need a kiss. I just need a friend. I need you back. You aren't the same anymore. You aren't healthy. You worry, you fret, you stress. Don't stress away our days together. Look at me. I am your best friend. You are mine. Relax, stop picking, stop worrying. Come back to me. I love you. And I miss you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But I can't spend the rest of my life living like this.

Confessions # 2989

I am not a wife, nor have I ever wanted to be someone's piece of land to own. Yet, I want to be your wife. Your face is so beautiful that I can only imagine what our children might look like someday. your thoughts are sensitive, and kind, and I know you would make an amazing Father and Husband. I wish you didnt drink so much, because I refuse to live as your wife, and mother of your children if you continue to abuse your body.

Confessions # 2990

I started talking to this guy through a website in April. He lives over 2,000 miles away from me. Well, things between us have been great. He has always been a gentleman with me. Only once did we argue and he was right. It was over the fact that my live in BF didn’t deserve me. The whole time we have been talking we discussed him coming to my city to visit. Well, I got rid of my live in BF because I really really like this guy. At the beginning of this month I mailed him my digital camera so he could take some pictures of himself, his life, and his city. He loved the idea and took pictures of his home and sent the camera back to me. I took photos for him and sent them through email. I had asked him what he would do if I decided to be spontaneous and showed up at his door. He said he would start kissing me. He told me where most the hotels r located. He even told me I should try and come within the next 2-3 weeks. I tell him the dates I have decided on. No reply since Monday. Mind you back in June he told me some how someone had compromised his email password and his email was becoming difficult to access. So when I asked him on Monday why he didn’t respond he says cause he couldn’t get into his email. Yesterday I went back to the website we met on and sent him a few messages and he didn’t even reply yet read them. Then I get an email stating I violated the terms of use and my profile was deleted. He is the only one I talked with through that profile. So here are my questions…Should I still surprise him? Should I wait it out and hope it is just his email messing up? Or Should I just give up and move on?

Friday, August 21, 2009

True Wife Confessions 18, Fully Legal

Confession #171

i've kissed 3 men since we've been married. i thought i was falling for two
of them. after realizing that it was only you i wanted, i stopped what i was
doing. you still dont know about it. and i will never tell you. because i
have a feeling you've done the same thing. and i can only hope that you
realized the same thing i realized and stopped what you were doing.

Confession #172

I find you repulsive. If you have a drive to take care of your family, perhaps you would be having more sex, big boy...

Confession #173

Remember when you took me out for our second date to the movies? While the credits were rolling I said, "Thank you", not "I love you" like you thought because you looked surprised and said, "I love you too". So when you tease me by saying, "You told me you loved me first and only after two dates", like I was so desperate and needy, you're just being an ass. I just never told you the truth. And I wasn't in love with you then.

Confession #174

I think about my exes. A LOT.

Confession #175

I hate being your wife. I've given you so many chances to get your act
together. I'm tired of being patient & stupid. I'm still here because you
took away the car keys so I can't make a midnight escape with the baby.
That & you threaten to take the baby away from me & I know you & your family
would do it. I'm stuck. For now.

Confession #176

I would give just about anything if you would (a) plan
something fun for us to do w/o being prompted by me,
and (b) notice when a chore around the house needs to
be done and not wait for me to ask you. You don't
realize that the resentment I feel about these two
issues is severely eroding our relationship.

Confession #177

I rarely let you get up with the baby anymore. It's not worth it. Because the 20 minutes of sleep you lost transfers into 3 hours of crankiness that I just can't tolerate. So I get up myself-after 5 minutes, I'm over it. You should get over it, too. You helped create her, so stop treating her like an inconvenience.

Confession #178

my husband sucks in bed and has made no attempt to try to get better. I am angry about it.

Confession #179

I have porn videos, even though you hate them. Whenever you spend the night at the shore with your buddies, I always get so inwardly excited because I get to watch them, ALONE!

Confession #180

Sometimes I hate you. Mainly because of your refusal to do more than the bare minimum to interact with and entertain our kids. You think you are a good dad and husband because you change a few diapers and occasionally take ONE kid somewhere with you. I am with these kids 14 hours per day while you work. On your days off all you do is sit in front of the computer or playstation, while I run around in circles trying to keep the two-year-old and five-year-old busy. You are always on the prowl for a way to leave the house and go have some beer with your buddy. You are so exhausted you sleep through the kids getting up, but yet you are ready to go for sex. And you wonder why you never get any.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

True Wife Confessions 298 thunderstorms

Confessions # 2971

As I wait for the test results I realize how much I love you. Many of the things I have done have not been in the best interest of our relationship. At least this one can be fixed.

Confessions # 2972
From a male reader:

I randomly stumbled across your website and found it intriguing to say the least. But I have a few comments that I would like to say to many of the woman that have posted.

I've seen a common thread come up again and again and again: mainly woman staying in situations/relationships that are totally bad for them and they know completely that they just aren't happy. Yet they tolerate it anyway. What!? I think there comes a point in every bad situation when enough gets to enough, and to all those woman I'd like to say that:

Life is short. It's not worth it to be miserable year after year. That's not living--it's only surviving. Life was meant to be enjoyed. Grab life by the horns and change your circumstances!

I hope you can add this or some similar message to your blog. I only send this now because it's hard to hear that so many people (woman) are enduring such terrible/unpleasant circumstances when the truth is that they really don't have to.

Confessions # 2973

Pride comes before a fall - oh yes, it does... I've always said - I will NEVER be the other woman, but that's what I have become. Regardless of what happened before I entered the picture - some part of the guilt is mine. I keep telling you to reconsider things and take your time - that is my rational mind talking - when all I want to do is to tell you to get things sorted - so WE can start. I pretend that I don't care about the whispered gossip about us around the workplace - but I am not so unconventional after all - I care - and it hurts... It hurts because I cannot share what I really feel, I cannot let anyone know what you mean to me, even if everyone seems to know. I have so many things running around in circles in my mind... I am in love with someone who is married, who practices a different faith, who is almost twice my age, whose culture and upbringing are totally alien to mine - and I have fallen with my eyes wide open - but the longer it takes you to make yourself available - the more I am afraid I will start resenting you. Completely contrary, aren't I? I ask you to think carefully and take your time - yet, I want you to be free to be with me NOW. But I still love you.

Confessions # 2974

In my eyes, you are the most beautiful man whom I ever saw.
On your computer, you have many pictures of others women.

When I approach you with sexy ideas, you (almost) always say no.
I feel beautiful and enjoy sex before you came into my life...

The worst is that you don't give a shit when I talk of this situation.
It's really painful. That's why, one day, maybe, I will say yes to a another man... a real one.

Confessions # 2975

Your extreme selfishness as well as your financial insecurity which makes you spent almost 2 hours a day trading and buying stocks(even though your income is now over half a million...)and still act greedy at home (when the expenses are not related to your needs)makes me puke. Above all, my family, parents brother and some friends have started resenting us because of your self centered behavior (and conversations)and the tension caused by it between us. If only you could see how your attitude prevents any woman (including me) to fall in love with you as a person instead of your status and your money !!!
But of course you are too proud and full of vanity to see that. All you crave for is admiration and compliments. What i look for in a man is the opposite of who you are : generous, modest, altruist etc..) Of course, you waited for a fist child to be born to show your true self.
My kids are only 5 and 3. I just cannot stand the idea of seeing them a week out of two....One day, when they're older, I should be able to live with this idea.

Confessions # 2976

I committed adultery because I didnt feel like you paid enough attention to me.
I wanted to feel wanted and desired. I wanted someone to have mind blowing sex with.

The irony is that the person who I committed adultery with, and all the other men I met along the way, didnt treat me as good as you do. They made me realize that you treat me like a princess. I am the luckiest girl in the world.

And the sex wasnt that great, either.

I feel like a piece of crap.

Confessions # 2977

I will not stay with you if you can't even be real with me and talk about what freaked you out after the play. I won't put up with your silent treatment because I get to travel great places for work. And I won't be patient anymore waiting for the sex to return. You quit marriage counseling because it is too hard to be real. I quit you. Marriage ain't for sissies. Grow the fuck up.

Confessions # 2978

I am a man, and imagined some of those confessions were from my wife. I know she is pretty happy, but could be much more so if I'd take my head out of my ass sometimes.
I think men act the way they do sometimes because of fear. If they / we could learn to live more fearlessly, and be ourselves, and be open to potentially being hurt, but being true to themselves. Men are physically strong, but emotionally and mentally weak (as a general statement).

Women are scared too, but for other reasons. Wish everyone could just be more open with their lovers, would be a happier world.

Thank you for your confession website, and I am now a big fan. If you post any part of my email, please remove any contact information, and ladies, please be kind.

Confessions # 2979

I don't mind us sleeping in separate beds. I think we both sleep better.

Confessions # 2980

We have been married for almost ten years and the spark we had when we first married is almost non-existent now. You are a good and loving man but your selfishness, hypocrisy, laziness and short temper (not that you would ever think of hitting me) is really wearing on me. All of this coupled with our non-existent sex life (once or twice a month for 10 minutes does not constitute a sex life) has me thinking about having an affair. I've never cheated on any man in my life but I am thinking of cheating on you.

I am tired of you ignoring me physically and then once or twice a month trying to wake me up at 2:00am for sex. I'm half asleep and have to get up in a few hours, why can't you come to bed at a reasonable hour? You're not doing anything important, just surfing the net or working on pet projects that could easily wait until the morning. I would gladly rearrange my schedule once or twice a week if I thought we were going to actually have sex, instead you get distracted and forget. Gee...that makes me feel real special. Or worse, you would prefer that I just lie there and not participate at all. Why don't you just get a blow-up doll and be done with it?

Not that your skills (or lack thereof) in the bedroom are anything to write home about, but something is better than nothing. I have tried to gently talk about things I like and don't like but you can't handle criticism of any kind and immediately get defensive. If you are going to get an attitude when I try and tell you how to give me a massage (you need to use BOTH hands!) I can't begin to imagine how you would overreact if I try and guide you on how to make love. I don't know if your lack of skill/enthusiasm is due to your excessive weight or other medical conditions but I am at my wits end. I'm about to buy stock in Duracell because I am buying batteries for my vibrator every other week!!!
I used to think that having an affair was the worst thing a married person could do, now I understand why people cheat. I am so starved for affection and intimacy it's not even funny. Right now I could name at least half a dozen men who would LOVE to be with me, if you aren't careful I just may accept one of the many propositions I have gotten lately.

The only thing that is keeping me around is our financial situation, but if things continue on their current path I will leave anyway. If that means we lose the house and I end up bankrupt in a studio apartment then that is what I will do. I am tired of feeling undesired and unloved by my own husband. I'm still relatively young, I don't want to live the rest of my life this way. I'm a passionate person and I'm tired of suppressing my feelings because my husband's libido has done a disappearing act. Work with me on this please...or I may very well end up "working" with someone else!!!

Monday, August 03, 2009

True Wife Confessions 297 lines of code

Confessions # 2961

I am a married woman in love with a married man at work….and he doesn’t even know it…

Confessions # 2962

I fell in love with you because of your openess to my wild sex desires. I felt we "matched". Now, after almost 3 years of marriage and two kids, I wonder how will I keep my interest in you... Conservative, NO "new things", new experiences, positions, place to make love: only this way, in the bedroom, naked and not using any of my toys. You never bought a single toy or sexy briefs. Twice a month is NOT enough. Waking me up during the night is PERMITTED, REQUESTED and DESIRED. Why is the world upside down between us? I AM the lady and YOU are the one not interested in sex...

Confessions # 2963

Remember when I told you I loved you, I lied. Remember when I said I was happy to have ALL those kids, I lied. I can't stand you. I wish you would realize that we are done and stop bugging me. I was young, I had no where else to go. I kept myself in this fantasy land where I thought if I told myself enough that I was happy that it would come true and it didn't. You suck the life out of me. Oh and remember how I told you that I didn't sleep with my ex-boyfriend, yeah I lied...6 times.

Confessions # 2964

You are the most selfless lover I have ever had. You have taken the time to get me to relax, let me feel comfortable, tell me how beautiful you find me, how sexy I am to you. I honestly didn't think that I could have an orgasm from oral sex before you. Thank you , my love.

Confessions # 2965

some times I can not stand how sassy you are! you are so selfish I cant stand to look at you! I dont know what I was thinking when I married you! I want out so bad but I dont have the guts to do it! I wish you would figure out how I feel and leave on your own!

Confessions # 2967

Oh where, Oh where do I begin? I hate you for not taking up for me when your brother jumped down my throat. What kind of man does not take up for his wife when another man threatens her? Brother or not. I despise your family. They think they are so PERFECT! HA! You think you're perfect! Sometimes I wonder why I stay. I stay because I can't leave. And that makes me sad. I stay because I chose to have a family instead of a career. I often wonder what my life would be without you. If I had never married you to get out of the house and a bad situation.

And why does everything always have to be my fault? Why can't you do any yard work? Yes you work your 40 hrs a week. I work mine too. You do NOTHING around the house except complain about not having home cooked meals every night. I did not marry you to be your slave, cook, housekeeper or personal assistant. I do those things because I WANT to not because I HAVE too. And all those home improvement chores you started and didn't finish? I just want to hurl! You only did it because the floor was rotting away. My dad doesn't even like you. He puts up with your low life because of me. And after your brother did what he done to me he has no respect for you or your family at all now.

Deep down I know you're in love with her. I can see it in your eyes. The comments you make. The way you talk to her. Try to make jokes or make her laugh. That breaks my heart! She probably thinks you're awesome only because she doesn't what kind of man you really are. Porn addict. closet drinker. You would die of shame if everyone really knew!

You are not even a great dad. When is the last time you spent any time with our kids? I mean quality time? Have you ever thought about things they might want to do? They only go with you on your "hobby trips" is to be with you. They don't care about your hobbies! PLEASE WAKE up and look around you! You are killing our marriage and family! Why can't you see?????

Confessions # 2968

I cheated on him 5 times, and can't count the ones where it's been online. Having sexual conversation with the man I loved since I was 18. He cheats on his girlfriend too, but we don't feel guilty about it...we just want sex.
I wish I could leave this house...even though my son loves it. We could be so happy just the two of us.

If only I could manage to save some money...or win some

Confessions # 2969

Saturday I tried to get some love from you and all I got was shot down. I went out and met someone who has made me feel alive in the past all I wanted to do was screw right there. I gave him a ride home and we were screwing around in the truck so I came home. I thought about him all night and went over sunday morning and screwed him on the couch. And it was so good I wanna do him again.

Confessions # 2970

I'm just like every other girl,
Who's ever wanted to be held by someone else-
And I'm just like every story,
Hoping for a love-filled ending-