Monday, September 04, 2006

True Wife Confessions 64 positions in the Kama Sutra

Confession #631

To my husband,

I love you, but life with you is really hard. Maybe I am just being selfish or naive. Someone flirted with me the other day. I loved it. I fantasize about about life would be like with them.

Being a step-mom, and dealing with their moms is tough. Dealing with your moms involvement with one of them is even worse. I know you and everyone Else is just doing what is best for the kids. Isn't growing up in a happy home with dad important too?

I stopped my infertility treatments this month. I do not think it is right to bring a baby in to the world when I am unsure. I am so mad. If those women who had your babies after knowing all of minute had the same sense I do I would not be agonizing over all this right now! How dare they get to do what ever they want, and then complain to us when things did not work out how they wanted it to. Thanks to all of you I suffer too!

I am so glad I ripped up your football tickets.

Confession #632

Remember that first awful month after I first found out about her? Remember when you crawled into bed with me, and told me how sorry you were that you'd hurt me, how much you loved me, and what were we going to do to fix it, then said you were going to see her again?
When I had my morning poo the next day, I stirred it around the toilet with your toothbrush.
I wasn't sorry one bit, and I'm still not.

Confession #633

You are the most amazing husband and father. You do more around the house than I do. You make dinner every night so I can sit and nurse the baby comfortably. You go to work every day so that we can have a nice home and I can stay home with our kids. But OH. MY. GOD. You're fucking snoring is sending me over the edge. PLEASE lose 10 pounds like the doctor told you to do 3 years ago. Our 8 week old is sleeping through the night but your snoring keeps me up. I really can't take it anymore.

Confession #634

I want nothing more than to beat this addiction. I can't describe how
much I love you for sticking with me through all these years of self
abuse. All the times I've resolved to get better and all the failed
attempts. I've broken so many promises to you. I worry that I'm
ruining your life. I wish I knew how to beat this so I could grow old
with you. I don't want to die.

Confession #635

When I started talking to you 8 years ago you were the sweetest man I knew.
When I went through rough times you were always there. Eventually I came
around to loving you and wanting to be with you. So 3 1/2 years ago I moved
350 miles from my family, friends and everything I knew to be with you. I
was scared but I knew you would get me through it. The first year we were
married was wonderful. You were loving and sweet. Then we started trying to
have a baby and realized that without serious assistance I couldn't have a
child. But to give you the baby you wanted I went through hell and back with
fertility treatments and such, all for you. I wanted it so badly, to make
you happy. But it just wasn't working. Through all of this I never
complained when you refused to go get checked out to see if you might be
part of the problem. It didn't occur to me that maybe even though you
constantly said you did that you really didn't want to have a baby with me.
You didn't love me enough to go plain and simple. And even when I had the
opportunities to cheat on you I didn't. I loved you and couldn't break your
trust that way. Obviously you didn't feel the same about me. Even when I
found out about your girlfriend I loved you enough and wanted to make it
work enough to forgive you. Well it didn't stop there. You just couldn't let
her go. You couldn't be happy with me and ended up screwing up my life,
getting me thrown in jail for assault... yes your WIFE beat you up, I
seriously hope you have trouble living with that fact. Then you didn't even
have the guts to talk to me about divorce, you just filed and never
mentioned it. My lawyer had to tell me you had filed. But for that I have to
thank you. You got what you deserved, your girlfriend wouldn't leave her
husband for you, you lost your job because I wasn't there to wake you up in
the mornings and your family still loves me. I bet that drives you crazy. I
hear you are getting married again, and my one piece of advice to your
future wife... good luck.. she's going to need it. And I just wanted you to
know that the man I am with now, is more of a man than you could ever be.
He's younger, sweeter, better looking, he treats me like a woman should be
treated and I'm happy for the first time in a long time. And that's all I
have to say.

Confession #636

Don't act like you are a huge martyr for canceling the premium movie channels on our cable. You never watched them, anyway. We were spending an extra $50 a month for the comfort of you knowing you 'could' watch a movie anytime you wanted to. What a waste of money. You bitch about the cost of our internet access-well, at least I use it. DAILY. I can't remember the last time you sat and watched a movie on cable.

Confession #637

When will you realize that charity begins in the home? You are more generous to others than you are to us. You buy concert tickets for friends, knowing full well we don't have the money in our budget. You offer to help finance your sister's move, and when it fell through, who was out the money for her security deposit and first month's rent? You feel bad for her-I get that. She's a single mom with a piece of shit for an ex...But that does not mean we should simply hand over all that we have and put ourselves in the poorhouse. If it were just you and I, maybe I'd be more ok with it...But we have a child. We have to buy food and diapers for her, and keep a roof over our head. You seem to feel the need to put everyone else first, so that they will love you and like you and appreciate you. You have a wife and daughter who love you, like you, and appreciate you for all you are and all that you try to be...Why is that not enough for you? Why do you feel the need to save the world at the expense of your family?

Confession #638

I should have married for money. You have no concept of how much things cost, nor do you care. You drain our bank account far too often and leave us in the hole. I am so sick of it. You wonder where the money goes, and when I show you how many ATM withdrawals you have made in the past two weeks, you get a confused look on your face-and then "Oh, yeah, I needed money to do...(insert stupid reason here)". And then you blame me for our credit problems. Well, maybe our credit would not be so shitty if you've leave some fucking money in the bank so that I could pay the damn bills and not keep paying insufficient funds fees. I should have stuck with that guy my mom wanted me to marry. He had tons of money.

Confession #639

You work 7 days a week up to 14 hours a day and it makes me sick to my stomach that I can not work, or even get a job that would cover day care for our two beautiful baby girls and still earn enough to help out our finances.
You are one of the most strongest people I have ever known. We have your sister and 5y/o niece living with us now and I see the stress it causes, oh my gosh I see it and yet you still try to make it a good situation for all and become the ring leader in every fight.

You work until your weak and still come home, the first words I hear are "how was your day, is there anything I can do" I love how considerate you are.
When you do get a day off, you spend it helping around the house which I never even have to ask for. You dote on our daughters and you love me more than any person I have ever known.
I love how no matter how much stress you are under, you still take the time to tell me how beautiful I am and play with your girls.
Your a damn hard worker and a damn good provider, and my hero. You gave me every reason to live and being with us is the most beautiful blessing, I'll never be able to thank God enough.

Thank you for these beautiful 4 years so far, Thank you being patient and understanding and devoted. Thank you for being the most wonderful father I have ever seen. I have never known a man to dote on two babies as much as you do, and still snuggle with his wife and help do chores.
Man I am blessed. I love you so so much I can't even describe.

Yes you have negatives, so do I, but by gosh your positives outweigh all.

Confession #640

If you want to own a home of our own someday, STOP WASTING MONEY. STOP buying shit we don't need. STOP buying DVDs. STOP going to concerts and shows. STOP ordering take-out at lunch when I pack a perfectly good lunch for you to take to work. STOP trying to keep up with everyone else around us...Nobody's dumb enough to think we actually have money. You just look like an idiot when you offer to buy a round at the bar, because everyone knows you really can't afford it.


Anonymous said...

To #638 & 640

I was you up til a year ago. Every time I cleared up our credit, he trashed it again. I spent a week before Christmas one year with 4 kids in a freezing house with no gas, no electricity and no water.

Be strong and you will find a way. An opportunity will open and you'll be able to take charge and fix things. It happened for me. Now I own my own home and a rental property. You can do it.

Anonymous said...

"You couldn't be happy with me and ended up screwing up my life,
getting me thrown in jail for assault... yes your WIFE beat you up, I
seriously hope you have trouble living with that fact."

Going to jail for assault is YOUR fault, not his. This is classic abuser talk, blaming the victim. For your own sake, you need to get counseling about this.

Anonymous said...

You know, I used to think like that, too. But when my ex-husband was cheated on me, I'm sure I was clinically insane from the stress, lack of sleep, and not being able to eat. I'm sure if I'd ever seen the two of them together, I would have snapped, and I'm a mouse.
Maybe she snapped, too.

Anonymous said...

I meant "cheating," not "cheated."

Anonymous said...

lmfao....putting the toothbrush in poo....freakin hilarious, why didnt i ever think of something like that with my bastard ex?!?!

Anonymous said...

hey#639, don't let this one go, sounds like a good man.

Anonymous said...

12:26 :

Why, thank you! I have to say that even though it was passive aggressive and very childish, I took great delight in it. He's still an asshole, two years later, and I'm still glad I did it!

Anonymous said...

#638 - Thank you.

In the exact same situation. Right down to the insufficient funds fees. We average $400-$800 a month in fees. I could have the Mercedes I dream of for that amount! Then he blames ME, alone, for ruining his credit.

Right. It's ALL me. I don't have it in me to be THAT stupid with money.

Anonymous said...


I could have wrote that myself ;)

Anonymous said...

#632 - Sure he deserved it, but I really hope you didn't kiss him after that!

Anonymous said...


That is my step-dad to a T. Pays his adult son's morgage payments. A son who has a good job and a stay at home wife. His credit is shit and all the cards are maxed but he still writes checks to charity organizations and buys expensive crap he'll never use.

Thank goodness my mother knows enough about finances to stay well out of it. She owns what she owns and keeps his name off it and vice versa. Too bad they still fight about.

I wish she'd never married him.

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh #638, I totally know how you feel! Those damn overdraft fees. And then somehow it's MY fault for not stopping him because "I know how he is"??? And every time I try and fix things, he just gets worse. Who has to talk to the creditors on the phone? ME. Who has to call and beg his mother for money to buy food? ME. Slowly he is learning something about money management, thank the good lord above. But I think I will be dead from the stress before it ever really gets better!