Thursday, October 12, 2006

TWC 92 Resolutions...part 2

Confession #916

Seriously--stop flushing the freakin' toilet before you are finished peeing.
I get the whole guy thing of "courtesy flushing" when you are doing the
other (although I do NOT get the reason for staying in there for 30 minutes)
but really--do not flush until you are finished. It's weird and it's gross.
No--you DO NOT time it perfectly so that it will all be taken down the
drain. There are still bubbles and a yellow tint to the water when I go in
there. It freaks me out. It makes me want to vomit. There are GERMS in
pee and I don't want you to leave them in there! I have to go to a
different bathroom in the house whenever you do this! It's gross!
Also--I'm pretty damn sure I NEVER get pee on the seat, under the seat,
around the base of the toilet, or on the floor in front of/around the
toilet--clean it the hell up!



Confession #917

There are so many things that suck about our current situation, and I KNOW that they are just that: situational. I know that situations are temporary, and that one day you will have a job and not be sick and I will be able to do at least some of the things I dream about doing. But I don't see an easy solution for now. When I picture the future, I never see the distant future where we can theoretically have a normal life. I always just see the next several months or years where I know things will still suck.
I love you, but I have to confess: I imagine you dying and things getting better. I don't want to lose you, of course, but I imagine myself being much more able to cope with losing a husband than with another year of this crap. And I'm ashamed of my fantasy, but I can't keep it out of my head.

Confession #918

I know I should feel lucky to have you.You are a great dad ,provider and help with the housework but......Why can't you be better in bed? I have never,ever had an orgasm while you were in the room unless a vibrator was involved. Not only do you suck in bed,you rarely even want sex.

You have driven me to meet men online and hook up with them for sex.I wish you would be a little more adventurous.We could be having such awesome sex if only you would quit being so uptight.What man doesn't want to have sex with 2 women at once? Apparently you!

Confession #919

You are a great guy. i love you so much. But dude, when I have a
raging sore throat, fever, and chills and have spent the whole day at
home with our four children, homeschooling them and breastfeeding
them and dragging my sick butt off of the couch to feed them, I NEED
YOU TO COME STRAIGHT HOME FROM WORK!!! Yes, a few minutes does make
a difference. I know you dont get sick very often, but sometimes I
wish you would just so you can remember what it feels like to have a
cold.

Confession #920


I think on divorce decrees they should add the following for reason of divorce:

-Failed to put a new garbage bag in pail (I mean, c'mon...yes, you take out the garbage, good job...but put a new one in , please!!!).
-Left clothing on floor RIGHT NEXT TO basket (Really? Can you not SEE it??)
-Put food in sink after the kids are done eating (I'm sorry, did I forget to mention AGAIN that we do not have a disposal in our sink...sorry.....and I WILL hit you with a spatula every time you do this...you think you would stop...maybe you like it?)
-Takes the highschair tray off, and leaves it on counter (When CLEARLY it would be too much trouble to just PUT IT BACK).

Babe, I truly love you. But these things, and others that don't come to mind are killing me. Yes, I make a mess. But who cleans it up? ME. When you make a mess, who cleans it up? ME.

I'm not your mom. Stop it. Now.

43 comments:

John said...

#916 Pee is sterile. That being said , I totally knowwhere you ar coming from.

Anonymous said...

Pee may be sterile, but who wants to sit on it? I'm almost ashamed to even tell this story, but I know a lady whose husband pees in their sink and/or bathtub at night because he's to lazy to aim in the toliet. Now, how nasty is that??? That's grounds for the big "D" right there...

Kate said...

In the tub? That is nasty!

Anonymous said...

In the sink? Nastier.

Anonymous said...

...My cat uses the sink and bathroom to pee in. X.x Granted she'll use the litterbox too.. but that's just nasty.

Anonymous said...

JEEZ! Come on! The cat happens to be nastier than the human. EEEWWWWW! Lock that cat out of the bathroom! aarrgghhh!

Anonymous said...

How is it that pee is sterile? Doesn't make sense. Have you not heard of hepatitis and other diseases? Pee is waste. Sterile? How about as sterile as the cat.

Anonymous said...

This nurse must comment on the pee issue:

Urine is NOT sterile once it has left the body. The surrounding tissues at the opening of the urethra are a haven for microbes, and urine passes right over these tissues as it exits the body.

Anonymous said...

Pee is a fluid that contains water, minerals, urea, and some other molecules. Not germs or viruses--pee is pretty acidic, and they can't survive in it.

Regardless, no one wants to sit on it or have it sitting in their toilet. And it SMELLS if you leave it there.

Anonymous said...

917-I could have written your confession... You (and I) have to believe things will get better.
I know how hard that is to say and to try to do... it's also perfectly okay for you to have bad days and feel discouraged. I've thought about leaving so many times in the past year or so I can't even count. No real advice; just know you're not alone

Anonymous said...

This is #916 again--THANK YOU for agreeing (doesn't really matter to me if it is sterile or not (mostly because the whole science of it is above me)--still gross! But more importantly, THANK YOU that now my husband can see that I am not crazy for thinking he is gross! Other people do to. Maybe I should threaten to tell people we know. . .(kidding!)

Kate said...

I guess it is only nasty if it is someone else's pee. I had a waterbirth almost 2 weeks ago and I was a little concerned about urine in the tub if I happened to "go" a little while pushing. My midwife said it was fine.

And yeah, I definitely agree that peeing in the sink is nasty. How can anyone *DO* that?

Anonymous said...

#918 How aweful for you! I'm so sorry. Sometimes I wish my man would participate more. I finally decided to just act on my own interest and "be nasty" and hope he catches up with me. It didn't hurt that I asked what his fantasies were either.

Anonymous said...

I think you are wrong 10:42. Pee is bodily fluid and if they can test your pee for AIDS and nicotine during a life ins. exam then I would say that pee is just not a harmless fluid whether it be mine or someone elses.

Andrea said...

918: No one can DRIVE you to cheat. That's part of your character. So take some responsibility for your reprehensible behavior and stop cheating. If you don't intend to stop cheating, divorce your husband. At the very least you will be saving him from getting a disease from your sleeping around.

Being married to someone who is not good in bed is the flimsiest reason to cheat EVER. Use the vibrator yourself. Watch porn. Take him into your idea of adventurous sex one baby step at a time to give him the chance to get acclimated to it. But stop cheating. If you can't, you shouldn't be married.

Anonymous said...

Drugs and blood come out in your urine too.

Anonymous said...

And I'm sorry, where did you all get the idea that pee is sterile?

Anonymous said...

Sterile or not, it's still DISGUSTING when it's all over the damn bathroom!

Anonymous said...

1:49--google it! I'm not being rude or a smarty pants, but
I've seen many urologist due to my husband's kidney problems and they all say that urine is in fact sterile. once out of the body is attracts bacteria. it's is gross to have to clean up after someone has dribbled on the toilet seat or floor, but under normal conditions, it's not going to make you sick or kill you

http://kidney.niddk.nih.gov/kudiseases/pubs/utiadult/

a quote from the site:
"Normally, urine is sterile. It is usually free of bacteria, viruses, and fungi but does contain fluids, salts, and waste products. An infection occurs when tiny organisms, usually bacteria from the digestive tract, cling to the opening of the urethra and begin to multiply. The urethra is the tube that carries urine from the bladder to outside the body. Most infections arise from one type of bacteria, Escherichia coli (E. coli), which normally lives in the colon."

so the actual urine is usually clean, but it only starts out that way

Anonymous said...

920 - get over it. Seriously. Does he treat you and your kids well? Does he come home to you every night? Does he tell you he loves you? I would think by reading this site you would see that there are husbands that actually do bad things and treat their wives badly. In the grand scheme of things, does picking up clothes *really* matter? I'm not saying it's not annoying, but even joking about divorce for that kind of stuff really irritates the shit out of me.

Of course, I could just be bitter and wish I had problems as insignificant as that with my husband. That I'm divorcing.

Anonymous said...

Hehe #920, if those were grounds for divorce, I think 95% of us would be divorced already, and this would just be True Divorcee Confessions.

(Am I right, ladies?)

However such habits are definitely annoying as heck; I've confessed about being annoyed by similar things here before myself. So cut her some slack, Anon 2:44. I know you have every right to be bitter given your current situation, but I am pretty sure #920 was joking.

Anonymous said...

Urine is indeed sterile inside the bladder unless you have a Urinary Tract Infection. That is why antibiotics work so fast for a UTI. The drug kills the existing bacteria and they are very quickly flushed away by the sterile urine that your body makes afterward. At least that is what my doctor says. But come on. Who cares. It is still gross and it stinks and I think #916 should give her husband a swift kick in the ass everytime he leaves it for her to deal with.

Another wierd pee fact: Male urine is much cleaner than female urine because it has less external anatomy to travel through to get out.
Don't ask me why I know that. I am not sure myself.

Anonymous said...

916, my ex-bf used to flush the minute he began urinating, and about half the time, he wouldn't finish until after the bowl was filling back up, and then he would have to flush again. it drove me CRRRAZY. what in the hell is the big hurry???

FireKatt7 said...

never a dull toilet moment at TWC! Some days its toothrush swooshing other days its a medical discussion on the contents of pee

I effin love this site!!!!

Anonymous said...

Whatever you guys....you talk like we could clean our cuts with it. The whole "pee is sterile" idea is just illogical. I mean if it is so "okay", then why don't they bottle it and use it. Have mercy!

Anonymous said...

My husband flushes before he's done peeing, too! He says it's a game. See if he can finish peeing before the bowls fills back up again.

Only a man would play games while on the toilet.

Anonymous said...

Or AT the toilet!

Altho, he does sit on the toilet to pee when he's too tired to stand up- like the middle of the night.

Oh, he'd be so happy I'm telling the world this. Another reason I'm doing it anonymously.

Anonymous said...

First--firekat, love your name-not sure why you picked it, but it just sounds cool! Second, I effin' love this site too! Third, SERIOUSLY men just crack me up! A game with the toilet! Why not a game of how well you can KEEP IT IN THE WATER!! Maybe I should get my husband some cheerios to put in the toilet to aim for like I did for my son when he was learning! He is 8 now and WAY cleaner than his father!

Anonymous said...

#916 here again (yes, I've been on here twice today--what can I say? I'm a TWC addict!)
firekkat7, thanks for the reminder about the toothbrush in the poo (that was TRULY one of my favorite posts) Maybe I'll tell my husband about that and say "You can never tell when I might be tempted to put your toothbrush in the toilet--you might want to make sure EVERYTHING is gone!!" Think it would work?!

Anonymous said...

My husband says that pee might not be sterile, but in a pinch you can pee on a jellyfish sting and make it stop hurting (I think he got it from a "friends" episode--not sure of the truth) He also said it would get rid of athlete's foot (I think that came from some movie--maybe my husband needs to reconsider where he gets his medical advice!)

Anonymous said...

Yeah, believe it or not they did use it to clean cuts or wounds in war situations etc.

And there are people who advocate "urine therapy" as a health suuplement. Yes, drinking a few ounces of your own urine each day. Don't believe me? Go to curezone.com and look on the urine therapy forum.

*shudder*

FireKatt7 said...

hahahaha well if pee is so sterile then in this case the toothbrush swishing wouldn't be harmful so 4:23 as long as he doesn't see any of these posts that should work :P Lol my bf does the same thing, you think that consider they actually have an aiming device they could aim for the middle instead of play "sprinkler"

Anonymous said...

urine will not help a jellyfish sting. You'll still be in pain, and stinky.

Nicole said...

#920 here...I was in fact joking. I would never get a divorce, ever. I'm a strict christian, and wanted to vent. My husband is an AMAZING man...but those little habits drive me BONKERS!!! lol

Anonymous said...

Pee is sterile while it's in your body. However, on its way out, it becomes unsterile. Gross.

sybil said...

"...but does contain fluids, salts, and waste products..."

Waste products being the operative words here. Who cares if it's sterile, it's waste. You can wrap it up in Martha Stewart paper and bows, but it is still waste and doesn't belong on the floor, sink, tub, under the rim..... ick.

Anonymous said...

The ammonia in urine is what helps relieve some of the sting of a jelly fish sting. It's just an analgesic...and since jelly fish stings can REALLY hurt, you may not notice it help that much, but it should some.

Also, aside from being used on cuts and things, I know urine soaked cotton balls used to be used on earaches. As well, until more recent technological developments, doctors diagnosed diabetes by tasting urine. It's not supposed to have sugar in it, but because diabetics can't process the sugar, they pee it out and the doctors could taste it. I'm a med student, and very glad we don't do that anymore!

Anonymous said...

So the subject of pee generates the most comments ever on this blog. Hmm.

Anonymous said...

No 11:54, I believe you need to check the archives. I believe that toothbrush swirling generated more than this and probably a few other topics.

Jef said...

ROFL at all the pee comments ... and quite informative as well :) Firekatt7, believe me, even the "aiming device" doesn't prevent us from missing the spot every now and then, no matter how hard we try ... but YES I do clean afterwards and have taught my 8y old boy to do the same.

Anonymous said...

good man.

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to say I SO agree with 916. IT IS SO GROSS!! I hate seeing that yellow tint, too! Aaarrrgghhh!

Anonymous said...

#918 - methinks you may possibly have a gay man in your bed.