Wednesday, December 27, 2006

True Wife Confession 139 discarded bows

Confession #1381

I know you think that you have a great relationship. You probably have told all your friends that he is the one. How long have you been dating? 3 months?

But he isn't. And why do I know? Because he asked me to come and have sex with him last night.

At first it was "We won't touch - just both be naked and put on a show for each other" - and then it moved to "We can touch and kiss but not have ACTUAL sex", which soon became "You can give me oral, but I'll wear a condom" to "We can do everything - I need you."

Every time I said no, his requirements became less. So, I don't know who you are. I'm not bragging ( so don't even start with me). I just hope you don't marry him because he will cheat on you with SOMEONE, even if it isn't with me. He can't even be faithful for three months.

Confession #1382

You are a great husband and super father. I really don't know what I'd do without you. I'm 6+ months pregnant with our second child (It's a boy!!! hahah!! I told everyone and you still don't know!!! I didn't really break the rules since this is anonymous!). You are great with wanting to help me out and not wanting me to carry things (we are slightly worried about pre-term delivery). However, I could deal withOUT the damn attitude every time you do want to help me. I know I am a little OCD when it comes to certain things (I hate having missing parts to our sons toys - he can't play with the toy if they 'pieces' go missing!) but at least I recognize when I am being like this and actually ask for your help so I can calm down a bit.

I asked you to move the laundry basket to the bed so I could sort the clothes (that YOU washed and folded, thank you!!) but you got an attitude and didn't do it. I ASKED for help because it hurts to bend over with this belly damnit. I should have to FEEL like I am pulling your teeth to help me out. Don't yank things out of my hands because you don't think I should be doing them...ask me if I'd like some help...and if I say NO, back OFF! Don't make me have the same conversation about throwing away our sons sippy cup contents after it has been used twice without washing. It's gross. People get sick when you don't wash things frequently - that's why in the freakin' dark ages they learned to wash their hands and clothes. We have a whole set of sippy cups and a whole set of adult cups - YOU ARE NOT SAVING ANY DAMN MONEY BY USING YOUR CUP 4 GAZILLION TIMES. It's gross!

Oh and if I think it's gross that our son's diaper pail stinks up his room - I have every right to want to clean it out and/or replace it without having to hear crap about it! It's gross and I'm getting rid of the damn thing. Yes, we'll obviously change more diapers - but I don't have to keep that stinky thing around. It's gross!

Yup - this confession stuff feels great. I'm sure we'll talk about it tonight and things will be fine. I love you and would never give you up - but like some of the other ladies have expressed on here - I could just freakin' strangle you for your ignorance and attitude sometimes!


Confession #1383

It's been a year.

I still fantasize regularly about cutting off your penis and ball sac.


Confession #1384

I know it's beyond selfish and cruel, but on days like this --days when you're a cold and relentless asshole-- I pray that I leave the house and get killed.
because...
I want you to spend a lifetime carrying the guilt of knowing that our last time together was spent with you killing my spirit in every possible way.

I fucking hate your bipolar disorder. I hate the you quit taking meds. I hate that one day I have a gem of a husband and the next someone who makes me wish I was dead.
I should have divorced you 6 years ago, but I held on because I know within you is someone spectacular. Had I known he would surface so little I wouldn't have wasted all this effort of trying to keep us together. When you're like this you don't deserve me. You don't deserve our children.

And since I'm on the subject of hate, I hate that during "this time of month" I can't have a fucking emotion without you attributing it to PMS. You know what fucktard, I hate (this side of) you because of YOU, not because of my emotions. You ought to be kissing my emotional ass because the truth is those heartfelt emotions of hope and love are the only things that have kept me here putting up with you all these years. Had my "PMS-y irrational" side taken over you wouldn't know our children or what it's like to be loved unconditionally. Fucking idiot.

Confession #1385

You would think after 13 years I would be able to just vaguely deal with your mother. I can't because she is the most selfish, bitter, cold-hearted, rude fat ass bitch I have ever met in my life. To this day I have never met anyone that has an such an ugly demeanor! I have put up with years of her trying to control our every move. She convinced you to throw our expensive pots and pans because the teflon coating was going to give us cancer and gave us her garage sale 15 year old replacements because they were "better". (of course I am at work when she goes through our cabinets, therefore can't stop her rampage). How about last Christmas when I received a 10# bag of potatoes with only 4# of potatoes in it as my gift. Four days later when I went to use them to make mashed potatoes they were rotten, then 1 week later she brings her brand new 2006 Impala by our house to show it off. This is the same person who couldn't afford to buy me or my daughter's a semi- descent gift because she has no money, though that $2000 she put down on the car just fell from the sky! Oh boo-hoo poor her that's all she ever talks about is herself! She is sooo fat and lazy and she doesn't have money because she refuses to keep a job that's any good, why because it's to hard or the people are mean! Please she is the queen of mean. I hate her, I can't stand to even look at her. God help me that you can't cut the fucking cord and realize who are the true loving people in your life! The thought of having to sit in her 5'x6' dining area with 3 chairs and her shitty food on Saturday for Christmas, truelly makes me want to throw up. She will talk bad about people we don't know and will be so negative and confrontational as always! Oh by the way you warned me the next time I stand up to her and tell her how I feel you will be gone, oh well! See ya!! She'll be so happy to have you up her ass everyday so she can make you move like the puppet she created every waking moment of every day. Just stay away with her!!! You make me sick for not standing up for me and our girls to her, how dare you!

Confession #1386

When we first started dating, you made it a point to tell me how beautiful your ex-wife is and no one will ever measure up to her. We were driving in your car, going on a date, and you tell me your ex-wife is beautiful. Even then, that early on into this relationship, I made up excuses for you. I thought oh well he's just drunk, he's still upset about his divorce. And I stayed. Here it is 11 years later, and I'm still making up excuses for you. Only now I'm the Mrs. and I ask myself time and time again WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING. The excuses I have made for you were only to help myself deal with how you'd hurt my feelings. And as insecure as I am, I made myself believe them to stop the emotional hurting. You aren't always the ignorant asshole that I now cannot get out of my head. You are truly a wonderful person and I know it. There are many good things about you, I just can't think of them anymore. The pain doesn't go away, it just sets idle on the side to be awakened again and again and again. They say forgive and forget. That would be easy if history didn't repeat itself. The things that don't happen more than once, for the most part, are forgotten, they're gone. But the ignorance caused by your drunkenness is reborn each time you get drunk. Sure, you're not always an ignorant drunk either, only most of the time. So yes, as soon as I see a drink in your hand, even when I hear you order one from the waitress, I'm pissed. It's instantaenous. The memories of belittling return, cheating accusations, public drunkenness stupidity and humiliation, you name it, it's happened. The only things you haven't done are steal and murder someone. We can't even go to my company Christmas party. In all the years I have worked there, I'm too afraid to go because you'll want to go with me, and it's an open bar. No way man, you are not going to create one of your scenes in my workplace, my safe haven. Ever. The one place I can go and be me, not be your wife, is where I work. You aren't going to take that away from me. You say I love my job more than I love you. Well now, you're right.

I must also admit that you drink nothing like you used to, I'll give credit where credit is due. But soooo much damage has been done, it's unrepairable. So many points in my life where I needed you to be my friend, my mate, my husband - you took those times and turned them into something about you. Your pity, your grief, your sadness. When I had to have a hysterectomy, I was devastated. My ability to have children was being taken away from me, and not by choice. I told you, laid down on the couch and cried my eyes out and what did you do? Went out to the garage and got drunk. I was alone, again, to deal with it. Hell, when I finally had it done, my sister had to come up here from another state, hundreds of miles away, to help me with the kids while I recovered. Dude, you're an asshole.

The good memories don't outweigh the bad in our relationship. The pain caused by the bad ones is too powerful, too over whelming, whatever good memories there are don't stand a chance and that's horrible.

I've always tried to be your safe haven, your person to tell your problems to, a shoulder to cry on so to speak, and I've done it well. You, on the other hand...you suck. Your family has thanked me, every one of them, for sticking by your side and showing you the love that you've needed. Hell, you've thanked me. You just didn't show it in return and now the damage is unrepairable. It's too late. I told you before I want a divorce, you say yeah right whatever. We've even worked out the kinks, and now you say it was all just to amuse me to help me through my mid-life crisis. A mid-life crisis? It's been an 11 year crisis and I won't do this anymore. We have a beautiful child together, absolutely gorgeous, and that little wonder is the only reason I have stayed around these last couple of years. I've given it my best, I can honestly say that, but my best wasn't good enough. I can't do this anymore, I won't.

I am leaving, sooner than you think. If you want to make this difficult, I'll make it easy. I am not afraid to start over, I will walk away with nothing.

Funny thing....you've always accused me of cheating on you. Now that I am, you've stopped. Hummm...

Confession #1387

You were so nice to me during Christmas I almost feel guilty about sleeping with him. Almost. But I know it is just a phase for you. You'll be back to your miserable ways soon enough.

Confession #1388

we've been friends for so long now that I can't remember a time when you weren't. I adore you to pieces and I know you feel the same. We also have a 'history' that is becoming more and more a regular part of our present. It's good, and your kisses make my toes curl and every nerve in my body alive, but if I'm being completely honest... when it comes right down to it, you're a selfish lover. I ALWAYS make sure you have a fantastic orgasm. You? You always make sure you do too.
Me? Well, let's just say that today on this thanksgiving day, I'm thankful for my silver bullet... because unlike you, HE always makes sure I'm SATISFIED!

Confession #1389

Why can’t he act right at parties? So we’re at a friend’s Christmas party.. they’re from our Bible study group.. we brought them some tequila for the margaritas… WHY can’t he keep his FREAKING hands off the alcohol! What a fucking drunk ass mother fucker! Then, whenever he speaks it’s just “fuck this.. fuck that.. fuck fuck fuck”.. ASSSHOLE! Damn! Can he ever get a grip! Can I really take him any place where I won’t be embarrassed about his behavior! Dammit! Then I have ride home with the fuckface! And pray that I get home safely. I offer to drive… BUT NOoOOoooooooooooooooOOOOoooooooooooooooooooo.. Oh no… he’s just fucking fine isn’t he. ASSHOLE! Stupid drunk bastard. And he wonders why he fucking gains weight and shit; How much fucking sugar do you think all those damn glasses of Crown Royal have!? Idiot.

Confession #1390

I fell in love with you as a young girl and never gave any other boy a second look...I thought you were Prince Charming and the fact that my father loved you made me happy...I waited and watched as girls your age flirted and I kept thinking that when I grew up I'd take you from them...And I did...

When you asked me out I felt so lucky...And I forgave you for making me wait 6 hours because you forgot about our date and were playing football...It was my very first date ever and I was determined to go with you, even though my mother told me not to...

I was determined that you wouldn't have to feel as if you weren't as good as me because you grew up poor...I didn't want you to feel bad for not having lots of money...I wanted you to know I loved you in spite of that so I never asked you to buy me things...I figured the less you thought I wanted from you, the more you'd want to give me on your own...I figured my genorosity would show you how to be generous...

I got mad when my sister-in-law saw me using my allowance to buy you a present and asked me if you were thoughtful like that to me...

I was mad at my aunt for saying that I was marrying beneath me...

I would've run away to be with you...

I let you f*ck me in my ass the entire time we dated, not because I wanted to stay a virgin, but because it felt so damned good and you were so horny that you pounded in and out of me like a damned piston...I loved it...Too bad you stopped doing it to me that way after we got married...It was wonderful...So many times I'd bumped my ass against you hoping you'd ram your d*ck into me and pound away really really really hard...Without my asking and without any reamble...But the few times I convinced you to at least try, you acted as if you couldn't get it in...All you had to do was grab my hips and shove it HARD...I was hoping you would, but you never did...

I'd suck your dick until your eyes rolled back in your head because I loved the taste of you and I loved having you f*ck my throat while pinching my nipples as I broght myself off with my vibrator...Do you know how lucky you wqere to have a young kinky wife who had ejaculatory orgasms???...I only let you reciprocate because you seemed to want to so badly, but you weren't good at it...And I stopped trying to show you how to please me in bed when you'd pout and not touch me for days at a time...It was easier not to argue with you, and later get myself off alone...

When we got married, I already knew you weren't the one for me, but our religious upbringing made me go through with it anyway...I wish i had slept with you before hand so I would've realized that you were so awful in bed, but I was afraid I'd end up never getting married and not have children if I didn't marry you..

I never told you my kinky sexual fantasies...I knew I could never trust you with them by that time...You never knew I had experimented a bit with female friends and always wanted to try being with several men at once...I kept it all to myself after I found out that you, 6 years older than me, were so boring in bed and were selfish and not interested in learning...You could've had me going to orgies, dumbass...I would've watched you f*ck other women and men...I would've let you f*ck me with other men and women...

I kept up the front when you'd come home to find me masturbating alone...You had no clue that I had my own stash of kinky porn in the VCR...I let you think I had planned you finding me, but I really only got "caught"...Telling you to unzip your pants and "f*ck my throat" was my way of covering up...If you had looked under the covers you would've found the remote and in the VCR was my porn...I hopped up to hide it as soon as you went to clean up after you came in my mouth...

When you hit me the first time and went to cry in the closet and begged me to stay, I pitied you...I already knew you were weak and I was afraid to leave to be on my own and allow my family to say "We told you so"...I stayed in spite of myself...I was young and so stupid in a strange place so far from my family...The same family you made it hard to keep in touch with, you control freak...

When the children came I told myself you'd learn to be more of whatever it was I needed if I just loved you more and was a better wife and I never let anyone know you were the weakest man I'd ever known...

I was so unhappy and I hid it for nearly 17 years of my life with you...I saw no way out...

Then you left for a cheating slut you met online...I was giddy thinking of getting rid of your selfish, lazy, no bathing, no teeth brushing, no toenail clipping, no foreplay giving, lil dick having, not knowing how to f*ck jerkwad!...It was sweet relief to finally be rid of you...And the best part was you divorcing me to marry her after her poor husband divorced her...I came out smelling like a rose...

Your family and all our friends were so shocked when you abandoned us because I always made you look like the perfect husband and father while I worked 2 jobs and did pretty much everything in our marraige...You money was your money, you cheap bastard...But I found the receipts to the things my money bought that b*tch while you planned to leave us all...

It's ok...I hear through the family grapevine that she and her grown son treat you like sh*t...That she reminds you that you live in her house and couldn't survive without her, just like you reminded me throughout our entire marraige...I hear you only married her because you needed her financial support until our kids are all over 18 and you can stop paying child support...And I hear you lie to her and tell her you're impotent so you don't have to have sex with her...Your brother tells his wife everything you tell him and his wife tells me...

Now you know how I felt married to you all those wasted years while you were stingy with not only money, but your love, your time and yourself...

I'm still not involved with anyone romantically because I'm still afraid to trust again, but I'm younger than you so I have time to meet someone to possibly grow old with...Only 2 more years and the youngest of our kids will be in in college and I can relax a bit and focus on me...

The kids and I are doing just fine without you...And since you've chosen to ignore them since you left, it gives me great satisfaction that although I wasted my youth on loving you, you will most likely be lonely in your old age because of all the people you treated so badly...

I take comfort knowing that when I die, I will no doubt be surrounded by the loved ones I've reconnected with...Your loved ones want nothing to do with you and I feel no guilt because they SAW how you behaved...I never said a word about how horribly you treated me and the kids...Not one word...I let you show everyone the really f*cked up person you've always been...I never gave them any information from my experiences with you...

But karma is making sure you're getting it all back...

BTW, that other gal you tried to cheat with before this one?...The one you visited in Conneticut when you were supposedly out of town on business?...I met her after you left...I was in our joint Internet account to change the password...She thought it was you, but when I told her I was the wife and that you'd left us, she asked if she could mail me a box of love letters written in your own handwriting, plus all the things you sent her including trinkets from our vacation (she said you stashed her nearby and she knew details about our hotel)...I have the box...

I'm keeping that secret from you...

It makes me smile knowing I was right not to beg you to stay...

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

#1387 - Mine was wonderful over Christmas and I do feel guilty for being with the other man!! I vow here and now it will never happen again!! I am sorry for the mistake I made hubby!! Hope you can forgive me!

Anonymous said...

Oh. My. Word!

Anonymous said...

After reading some of these I am so thankful for my wonderful husband!!

I am with 1:44.. OH My Word on some of these!!!

Anonymous said...

This was my confession...I was shocked to see it actually be posted, but getting all that off my chest was truly liberating!...

Sorry for some of the spelling errors...I I typed it all in one shot before I chickened out...Thanx for listening...

Signed,
The One He Left, But Still Stronger Than He'll Ever Be

Amanda said...

Wow...just wow!

Anonymous said...

1390-Why does this one seem so over the top and made up? I don't mean to be accusatory but "I let you f*ck me in my ass the entire time we dated" seems to contrast greatly with "When we got married, I already knew you weren't the one for me, but our religious upbringing made me go through with it anyway...I wish i had slept with you before hand"

Anonymous said...

1389, if he drives you home and he's drunk, and you guys crash and you're both killed or crippled, that is sad.

But if you guys crash into someone else and that person is killed or crippled, THAT PERSON HAD NO CHOICE. You chose to step into your drunk husband's car; anyone you guys hit was just minding his own business. That's unforgiveable.

Take the car your own damn self and call the cops on him if he tries to take it away from you. Or take a cab and call the cops and say that there's a drunk driver out there and give them the license plate number

Drunk driving is a crime. If you let it happen, you're helping it happen. Don't.

Anonymous said...

Why is 1390 perfectly comfortable writing about taking it in the ass but can't write the word fuck without putting an * in place of a U? What the fuck is up with that? Sorry, what the f*ck is up with that?

Anonymous said...

Um...I wrote #1390...

Sorry if my letting all of that out offended anyone, but I was a teenager in love and we were both brought up in a very strict religious way...

Might not make sense to some, but those who grew up in the same way might understand...You want to try to toe the line, but come up with creative ways to technically stay "virgins" cuz you think that's better than "defying God"...It's impressed on you that not having intercourse before marraige is what you're supposed to do...I'm no longer active in that religion, BTW...

After my Ex left us, we stopped going to church...It seemed like he hid behind the church and the kids and I aren't religious anymore...If we ever were...But we are spiritual in our own ways...It feels more honest...

I censured the F word in my confession cuz when I didn't, it really made me feel as if I was being rude...It looked ugly...I dunno...Probably just my upbringing coming out...LOL

Yes, it's probably shocking, but at 45 yrs old, it was very freeing to get it all out...There's been no one I'd tell all that to in my personal life...I couldn't...How could I?...

If I hadn't found this site and been able to confess it anonymously, I would've taken all that secrecy to my grave...I'm just glad that now I don't have to...

It's out of me...And it feels really good not to carry it around anymore...You have no idea...

Anonymous said...

anonymous 7:09, I was thinking the same thing.

You allow a man to ram his member in your behind the entire time you were dating because you loved it so much, but after marrying you found out he was terrible in bed. HUH?

Anonymous said...

1390, You censored the word fuck because it looks ugly and rude, but your confession of habitual sodomy doesn't. What? How old are you really?

I have written confession here before, so I don't judge others. But it is obviously that you were going for the shock factor.

Anonymous said...

139 discarded bows. Yeah Buddy! Ummm....again...OH. My. Word!

Anonymous said...

Well, I really didn't think that even here where there was finally a place for an anonymous confession that I'd end up defending writing something I never dreamed I'd be able to write, but yes...I did enjoy having anal sex ith my Ex...On our honeymoon I figured vaginal intercourse would get better, but it was pretty much missionary position unless I manuevered him into doggie style, but even then he was very perfunctory...It was awfully bland and the books and experts saying "Try to show him what you like" made him get surly and selfish...

I was inexperienced, too but I tried like Hell to please him...He resented my attempts at getting him to do the same...Funny thing is, he came off as though he was really some sort of Casanova...I learned to simply let him do whatever he did, then use my vibrator later because he wasn't interested in knowing...

As a matter of fact, even now(I'm 45) he's been the only one I've ever had intercourse of any kind with...Sad, huh?...

I had a few touchy-feely episodes with 2 different females, but that was before him (around 16)and I got married at 19...

I've been celibate since he left...Mostly out of fear of intimacy (I'm not sure I want to put my feelings on the line getting close to someone right now while I try to make sure my kids are raised properly)and the very real fear of sexually transmitted disease these days...

"Habitual sodomy"?...You think kids even now don't do that or oral sex, thinking they're avoiding pregnancy?...Some are doing it because they're trying not to break thier parent's ingrained religious code...Most teens don't think anything other than vaginal intercourse is "real sex" and when asked they say they're still virgins...

I know this because I'm a nurse who has interviewed my teen patients about STDs...They're shocked that they can get STDs in the rectum or throat because they think STDs aren't passed except through intercourse...I've had several teens find out they had Gonorrhea of the throat from giving oral sex...And many think a condom or dental dam aren't really necessary...

"Shock value"?...Honey, my intent was to get out some stuff I never thought I'd ever be able to share...If anal sex shocks you, I'm sorry...Not everyone likes it...I happen to enjoy it...I would've preferred it over vaginal, actually...No way my Ex could mess it up...LOL

But if my confession shocks you by reading it, imagine how lonely it's been to live it and have no one to tell...Could I have told my family and friends all of this?...Could you have told YOUR family and friends?...Seriously?...

I suppose the confessions about women cheating for years or harbouring hate against mothers-in-laws forever or fantasizing about killing thier husbands in thier sleep or hating the way thier children smell are less shocking, huh?...

When someone has a secret, it doesn't matter how innocent it might seem to others...That secret still burns a hole into thier psyche...My secret was a bit more "shocking", true...But it was cathartic to put it out there in writing and be rid of it...Finally...

That may not mean much to you, but I know that for the past few days after writing, my mind is lighter and I'm not sure how to explain it exactly...I feel less angry at my Ex...and myself for staying so long...I feel as if I might actually be able to get over it a bit more easily...Isn't that worth something?...I think it is...

deb said...

I think confession is good for the soul and you sounded like you had a lot to get off your chest #1390. As for the negative comments about your confession, leave the lady alone, none of us knows what this woman has gone through and none of us has the right to judge her. And for #1390, I hope that you are able to find peace and happiness in your life.

Anonymous said...

As someone who themselves has read their own confessions on here, both serious and silly ones, you do find yourself having that "lighter" feeling after seeing it stare back at you.

I think that maybe some of the people here who found your confession hard to believe are simply skeptical because of the few "fake" ones that have been preceived so on this site.

The point of this site(IMHO); besides being an outlet for our fears, joys, anger, and sadness; is that we are able to see that we aren't the only one going through what we're going through. Someone else has a cheating husband, someone else is cheating, someone else hates their mother-in-law and yes, someone else likes the butt love - all of it.

And maybe I'm the only one, but I come here to acknowledge your confessions. To make them valid and real. And to escape my own reality for a few minutes a day.

So, the jist of this long statement, is that I'm glad people like #1390 write here because not only will they, and someone going through the same thing, feel a little better, but it's damn good entertainment.

Anonymous said...

#1390 - Go Sister! I completely agree with 5:28pm. Thankfully there is a forum like this to get it all out. Some women will never be able to stop judging and start supporting. I Hope these "judges" don't need a shoulder to cry on, because they may find they have "judged" all the support out of their lives. Best of luck to you & I hope you can find what you are looking for in the future. Some of us out here have your back.

sophia said...

Anything one writes which is real, is a form of confession. I am the author of 1400. Are you suprised that a philanderer would make light of philandering? Should this site be only for the bitch and moan confession? I think not.

Im not sorry to be married and have a lover besides. No apologies from me. You know nothing of my life. Nor I of yours. If an affair is not your style, then dont have one. Or is this site to be read and written by only the holier than thou.

Anonymous said...

So what you're saying, Sophia, is that you are cheating scum....? No holier than thou here. Right is right and wrong is wrong. Making light of it shows just how immature and full of self hatred that you are. Cheating hurts people. Lots and lots of people. And, YOU, are part of that. Aren't you proud? Ha, Ha, that's really funny.

Anonymous said...

I know you 1390. Girl, maybe it's high damn time you took a reality check instead of making up whatever fanciful rage inspired fictional story fits with your anger and rationalizes your actual viscous secret revenge. Your delusionally acting out secretly to hurt someone as much as you possibly can, who IN REALITY, not your fictional little play, never did a goddamn thing to hurt you and treated you with kindness respect henerosity and whatever kink floated your boat. If he was unwilling to play along with your nonsense bullshit stories like this one, that hardly makes him weak. Screaming about how weak he is and blah blah blah are the cowardly and destructive types of reactions that got you in the mess you find yourself. He tried repeatedly to communicate with you, and you flat out shut him down. Then you complain about how HE abandoned you? Stop your fictional tales of nonsense and try for ONCE to recall what really happened with him: You had one of your unprovoked rage breakdowns, and he overeacted by taking it personally. Both of you were then too fucking stubborn to approach the other to make amends, The snowball of anger kept building and behold the mess you're both in. He only ever wanted to be with you. He was devoted to you but could not deal with no communication from you at all, just rage. It was baffling and destructive to you both. He never cheated on you. Or any other of these things you imagine. Please stop imaging things that DID NOT HAPPEN and think. His tolerance for your antics was nothing short of deserving a medal of honor. Think! Fictional tale after fictional tale are only going to make this worse for you. Making up stories of you belittleing him or openly cheating on him are ludicrous and disrespectful of even yourself. If for a nanosecond you could embrace reality and not some perceived fictional drama life would be far simpler. It can start with a phone call, or continue to self-destruct with more and more made-up stories. Don't you want to start a real life yet and put your anger driven fictional tales of a life that doen't exist behind you. He wants you back, if only you could mend some of the damage you caused, and make a much better effort to communicate DIRECTLY with him.

He told me he feels particularly estranged from you that you won't even call him to see how he's doing after his mother died last week. Making a joke out of this and any other misfortune is ...well...I think that's pretty obvious.

Look at youself and what you've been doing. He's not afraid to approach you, he just knows that his efforts will only be met by rage as they always have in the past. It would be pointless. He'll forgive just about anything if you're honest and communicate without injecting poison and rage into everything you say. I've seen some of the things you wrote to him. It's repulsive. This is not strength, it's weakness. And tragic to watch.

Or you can live on alone and apart and be happy with your fictional history books.

Anonymous said...

I agree that this is mostly bullshit. This is probably that same angry girl that was spreading all those supposedly withering "nice guy" confessions around craigslist last week. Time to grow up. I say he's far better off without Ms. Drama Queen. Go find yourself a drunken wife beater and keep the cycle of abuse from your past going.

Anonymous said...

I really liked the cosco story 1390. This one, not so much. I wish you would call. I never saw things that way that you told them in the costco version, but I can see your side. What a collosal misunderstanding. The parts about the sexy schoolgirl outfit and driving across the lawn made me smile and miss you terribly.

If you help me clean up all this broken glass, I'll take you to Catalina and get you the pirate costume. But ain;t no way I'll dial a rage, however. You gotta call me when you're cool headed.

Anonymous said...

#1390 - Can I buy you a drink?