Confession #2851
I wish my husband would die in a car accident so I could get my paycheck already. There. I said it. Its the truth and I don't care how painful it is!
Confession #2852
I love you so much it hurts. I cherish every moment we spend together. As cliche as it sounds you are my best friend. I am so lucky to have you in my life. I may not always show it but you mean everything to me :) Thank you for being my husband
Confession #2853
You say that you want more children, that you love them and are really good with them.
Well, you’re not. And you and I will never have any more.
You can’t be bothered to help with homework. I usually attend school functions by myself because you are “busy” (aka playing computer games). I buy him Christmas and birthday presents because if I left it to you he would not get anything. I sit with him when he’s sick and comfort him when he’s sad. He talks to me about anything and everything because I actually listen. When it comes to our son I do everything.
You know nothing about him. You don’t know what he’s allergic to, who his friends are, who his teacher is or even what his favorite color is. Bellowing orders from your office is not effective parenting.
I just think it is a bit ironic that the woman who in the beginning never wanted children is a better parent than the man who wanted lots of children.
Confession #2854
my husband came home 4 hours late. i look at his phone. i see a picture of his penis and he had a hard on when he took it at work. i will like to know some info about it. I'm thinking that he is cheating. can you tell me something?
Confession #2855
Let me just say that you are wonderful. I am so grateful to have met you. You completely saved me from a-hole after a-hole. You're my best friend, a wonderful father, an excellent provider, a devoted husband, and a fantastic lover. I love you to the bottom and depth of my soul. It's been the greatest 18 years of my life and I would not trade you for George Clooney. I am now and forever yours as you are the best man I have ever known. We have a beautiful child and life is as good as it should ever be.
Confession #2856
I love that you took a Friday off so we could reconnect. Yes, we had fabulous sex, but more than that - we swept away the stress of the past month and lay in bed, laughing and kissing and simply being together. This is why you are MY man.
Confession #2857
Well so I did some nosing around and check some phone records and see a ton of strange numbers on there. There are all girls when I call to find out who they are. I don't ask him because of the fear that something is going on. I don't want to start another huge fight. I just want some dam honesty in our relationship. I don't know how to approach the issue anymore. We have talked about it before about the female friends that he has that he talks to and how I don't talk to male friends because it bothers him but he doesn't do the same for me. I just don't know what to do.
Confession #2858
Why can't you come look at the bathroom I just painted, but I can look at the trailer you built? It drives me crazy! I am doing some thing for us the house, you are doing something for yourself. All I want is an acknowledgment. Maybe I expect too much... yeah right...
Me
Confession #2859
When you listen to me - and laugh at my jokes - I fall in love with you over and over again.
Confession #2860
I know you are married. And you love your husband. In fact, I love your husband - he is such a great guy, funny, smart, sometimes a little selfish but overall, really a good person. One of my closest friends. But I can't stop thinking about what happened between us or when it will happen again. I know he claims not to care because I'm a woman, but I still feel like we have to be discreet. And it makes me feel like my veins are on fire. My heart sort of leaps when you walk into a room. I know this is going to end badly and we might end up damaging our friendship and work relationship but I sort of don't care. Stop being so damn sexy and maybe I will be able to think about something else.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
True Wife Confessions E-Lev-En
Confession #101
Your inane, incessant questions are not only annoying to me, but also to
your children. I have coached them into just nodding and responding with, "I
have no idea." Shut up, already.
Confession #102
I hate you when you ask the question, "What's for dinner?" It makes me want
to punch you in the mouth. Why should it matter? You are going to eat it,
whatever it is, because you know that it would be a cold day in hell before
you cooked your own dinner or missed a meal.
Confession #103
It was really not fun when your dad came to visit and, instead of "Hello", the first thing he said to me was "What's for dinner?", at 9 pm, as I was just stepping in after a day of work, school and being pregnant. Did I mention I hate him?
Confession #104
Since I have to drive you to work and pick you up (as you refuse to get a driver's license while we are overseas), and since your workday starts at varying times, and since sometimes you want to get to work earlier than other times, when I ask what time you want to leave the house, tell me what time we want to LEAVE THE F*CKING HOUSE, not what time you are expected to report for duty. If I say "what time do you want to LEAVE tomorrow morning?" and you say "7:00," don't freak out on me at 5:45am when you are ready to leave for the 15 minute drive to work and I'm not even dressed yet.
Confession #105
If you want help, Ask for help. Staring at me from across the room does not communicate that you need help. I don't read your mind. I don't even WANT to read your mind. Open you mouth and say "Can you help me?" The child gets it, you should too.
Confession #106
If I work all day and you've played video games all day, and I come home and cook dinner, and you say "leave the dishes, I'll get them" and then they are still in the sink when I start trying to cook breakfast, and you say "I'll do the dishes after breakfast," don't be surprised if I'm slamming around and washing dishes and being curt with you. I can't make your damn breakfast if the pan I need is still dirty and in the sink under a pile of dinner dishes.
Confession #107
Do not ask me questions when I am half asleep and then act surprised when I get pissy about them. I was ALMOST asleep. Now I am not. I am not happy. If you see me in the "International position for being asleep" I suggest you leave me alone.
Confession #108
Giving me "the look" at bedtime isn't ever going to put me in the mood. I get up at dawn after going to bed at 11 p.m., then spend all day trying to get work done while our kids tug at me, demanding my time and attention. Then you come home and want something from me as well. Want to know the most effective foreplay in the world? You cleaning up after dinner, feeding the dogs, bathing the kids, picking up the their mess and putting the them to bed instead of me doing it.
Confession #109
Dear husband, I am so tired & sleepy by the time you get home from work
around 11:30 at night, I really wish you'd just go to bed when you get
home, and go to sleep instead of turning on that damn television and
letting it blare to all hours of the night and early morning.
Don't you know a girl needs her beauty sleep and believe me honey, it
wouldn't hurt you to get a little of it too, you're starting to get bags
under your eyes and I've noticed a bit of yawning when I wake you up for
work at 4:00 in the morning. Please sugar face, honey bunch... just keep
the damn television OFF!
Confession #110
The largest part of your ego, personality, and relationship with others is based on the knowledge that you are “hung”. If you ever lost your penis, you would probably cease to exist.
And I hate having sex with you because it hurts.
Your inane, incessant questions are not only annoying to me, but also to
your children. I have coached them into just nodding and responding with, "I
have no idea." Shut up, already.
Confession #102
I hate you when you ask the question, "What's for dinner?" It makes me want
to punch you in the mouth. Why should it matter? You are going to eat it,
whatever it is, because you know that it would be a cold day in hell before
you cooked your own dinner or missed a meal.
Confession #103
It was really not fun when your dad came to visit and, instead of "Hello", the first thing he said to me was "What's for dinner?", at 9 pm, as I was just stepping in after a day of work, school and being pregnant. Did I mention I hate him?
Confession #104
Since I have to drive you to work and pick you up (as you refuse to get a driver's license while we are overseas), and since your workday starts at varying times, and since sometimes you want to get to work earlier than other times, when I ask what time you want to leave the house, tell me what time we want to LEAVE THE F*CKING HOUSE, not what time you are expected to report for duty. If I say "what time do you want to LEAVE tomorrow morning?" and you say "7:00," don't freak out on me at 5:45am when you are ready to leave for the 15 minute drive to work and I'm not even dressed yet.
Confession #105
If you want help, Ask for help. Staring at me from across the room does not communicate that you need help. I don't read your mind. I don't even WANT to read your mind. Open you mouth and say "Can you help me?" The child gets it, you should too.
Confession #106
If I work all day and you've played video games all day, and I come home and cook dinner, and you say "leave the dishes, I'll get them" and then they are still in the sink when I start trying to cook breakfast, and you say "I'll do the dishes after breakfast," don't be surprised if I'm slamming around and washing dishes and being curt with you. I can't make your damn breakfast if the pan I need is still dirty and in the sink under a pile of dinner dishes.
Confession #107
Do not ask me questions when I am half asleep and then act surprised when I get pissy about them. I was ALMOST asleep. Now I am not. I am not happy. If you see me in the "International position for being asleep" I suggest you leave me alone.
Confession #108
Giving me "the look" at bedtime isn't ever going to put me in the mood. I get up at dawn after going to bed at 11 p.m., then spend all day trying to get work done while our kids tug at me, demanding my time and attention. Then you come home and want something from me as well. Want to know the most effective foreplay in the world? You cleaning up after dinner, feeding the dogs, bathing the kids, picking up the their mess and putting the them to bed instead of me doing it.
Confession #109
Dear husband, I am so tired & sleepy by the time you get home from work
around 11:30 at night, I really wish you'd just go to bed when you get
home, and go to sleep instead of turning on that damn television and
letting it blare to all hours of the night and early morning.
Don't you know a girl needs her beauty sleep and believe me honey, it
wouldn't hurt you to get a little of it too, you're starting to get bags
under your eyes and I've noticed a bit of yawning when I wake you up for
work at 4:00 in the morning. Please sugar face, honey bunch... just keep
the damn television OFF!
Confession #110
The largest part of your ego, personality, and relationship with others is based on the knowledge that you are “hung”. If you ever lost your penis, you would probably cease to exist.
And I hate having sex with you because it hurts.
Monday, March 16, 2009
True Wife Confession Base 10
Confession #091
I am still having a hard time forgiving you for having what I consider
to be an emotional affair with your old coworker. The fact that you don't
think there was anything wrong with it (and it was me being too sensitive)
doesn't help. It's turned me into the cell phone checking, email snooping
wife I never wanted to be.
Confession #092
I hate when people ask us if/when we are having more kids. I tell them "I don't know" even though I know the answer is "never." Sure, I'd love to have another child, give our daughter a sibling, and quite possibly give you a son to carry on your family name. But I know our marriage would not survive. More specifically, I would not survive as your wife knowing again you'll be lazy, selfish, and unhelpful. Congratulations, Fun Daddy, your family name ends with you
Confession #093
I am in love with someone else.
Confession #094
I purposefully waited until your butt touched the chair before asking you to get me something to drink because you seem to do it to me all the time. Didn't like it very much did ya?
Confession #095
No matter what anyone says ... an IOU is not a birthday gift or a mother's day gift. It is a piece of paper that means nothing - especially if you don't follow through
Confession #096
If you text me again asking me to transfer money to your account so you can
buy shit for yourself, I will throw away your cell phone.
Confession #097
I truly, truly hate that every time you think you are paying me a compliment
you end it with a but....dinner was good, but... You look nice, but....
You are an asshole. No but.
Confession #098
I hate how you complained that you had to do the dishes again last
night. I am eight months pregnant with your first born child and you
will never understand how I'm feeling right now.
Confession #099
You are the LAZIEST of lovers. You lay there on your back and do nothing. You used to do magical things with your fingers - what happened? My signal for sex is an arm around my neck. Gross. You have no clue how hard I can orgasm if you would get off your fat ass
Confession #100
I resent paying for Head and Shoulders shampoo so much that I have been
buying generic shampoo and putting it into the same Head and Shoulders
bottle for over two years. Honey, you're bald and you don't need shampoo
anymore. You especially don't need one that controls dandruff. You have
more hair on your ass than you do on your head and you use soap on your ass.
Enough already!
I am still having a hard time forgiving you for having what I consider
to be an emotional affair with your old coworker. The fact that you don't
think there was anything wrong with it (and it was me being too sensitive)
doesn't help. It's turned me into the cell phone checking, email snooping
wife I never wanted to be.
Confession #092
I hate when people ask us if/when we are having more kids. I tell them "I don't know" even though I know the answer is "never." Sure, I'd love to have another child, give our daughter a sibling, and quite possibly give you a son to carry on your family name. But I know our marriage would not survive. More specifically, I would not survive as your wife knowing again you'll be lazy, selfish, and unhelpful. Congratulations, Fun Daddy, your family name ends with you
Confession #093
I am in love with someone else.
Confession #094
I purposefully waited until your butt touched the chair before asking you to get me something to drink because you seem to do it to me all the time. Didn't like it very much did ya?
Confession #095
No matter what anyone says ... an IOU is not a birthday gift or a mother's day gift. It is a piece of paper that means nothing - especially if you don't follow through
Confession #096
If you text me again asking me to transfer money to your account so you can
buy shit for yourself, I will throw away your cell phone.
Confession #097
I truly, truly hate that every time you think you are paying me a compliment
you end it with a but....dinner was good, but... You look nice, but....
You are an asshole. No but.
Confession #098
I hate how you complained that you had to do the dishes again last
night. I am eight months pregnant with your first born child and you
will never understand how I'm feeling right now.
Confession #099
You are the LAZIEST of lovers. You lay there on your back and do nothing. You used to do magical things with your fingers - what happened? My signal for sex is an arm around my neck. Gross. You have no clue how hard I can orgasm if you would get off your fat ass
Confession #100
I resent paying for Head and Shoulders shampoo so much that I have been
buying generic shampoo and putting it into the same Head and Shoulders
bottle for over two years. Honey, you're bald and you don't need shampoo
anymore. You especially don't need one that controls dandruff. You have
more hair on your ass than you do on your head and you use soap on your ass.
Enough already!
Monday, March 09, 2009
True Wife Confessions 285 Humanities
Confession #2841
My life is completely fucked up. I have just been through a terrible trauma and what do I get? You telling me that your sister is more important then me to you. And I cant believe you have resorted to name calling. How did I get here? I thought I was marrying someone who loved me and was prince charming. You wont fuck me, its driving me crazy. Yes I have put on a few lbs since we met, but for fucking crying out loud Im still wearing a size 8! I feel so alone. That guy that I used to see everyday was the bright spot in my day. He was so good looking, and just my type. Bastard is devoted to his wife so he wont cheat, I know cause I tried to get with him. I have tried to tell you but you wont listen, if you wont give me what I want in bed I am going to find some big hunky guy that does p90x to give it to me good! Cause I need it! Ugh. What happened to that guy that couldn’t keep his hands off of me and thought I was the sexiest thing around. Remember him? He was horny all the time, I want him back! I understand people that cheat now, I never did before. I promise you that I will be married to you until the day I die, but I will probably have an affair or two….I just need a lot of male attention. I would be more than happy if it came from you, but you wont give me any attention. Wanna know how I remember the day our child was conceived? Because that day we woke up early for sex and it was really good, then on my way out the door you whistled at me. Made me feel like a million bucks all day. Why cant you do that all the time?! Dammit! I do that for you, I am always checking out your ass cause hot damn you have a great body and a spectacular ass….I want you just thinking about it. But of course I will get nothing cause you are too tired or have a cold or have a headache tonight. If you only knew how many times I have watched the p90x infomercials and……of course you wouldn’t know cause you sleep in the guest room everynight. Come to bed at the same time I do everynight and I'll rock your socks off. Wow, did I ever get off the topic here, I came here to complain about my sil but the post took a different direction…..she's a selfish bitch and her actions over the last 2 weeks have shown me her true colors. She cant even be bothered to give me a quick email to check on me to make sure Im ok. I thought we were friends and almost sisters, but I guess not. Of course this is the same woman that told me a few years ago that if it werent for my child her and the rest of the family would never want to see me again..guess I should have put the pieces together then….
Confession #2842
I don't know if its your or these pregnancy hormones, but you make me feel absolutely miserable. I mean some moments I honestly believe I HATE you. I want to scream and yell and throw things at you. But instead I go sit alone and cry and think if we made a mistake to have this baby. I feel so pathetic when our 9 year old son comes and hugs me and tells me that its ok and you sit on your lazy ass and watch tv with the damn dog. Its not his job and I feel like a bad mom because he knows this happens even when I try to hide it. Its funny how you can turn this all around to be my fault.What have I done.
Confession #2843
I can't believe that after almost 17 years, I can still love him the same, maybe because I never stopped loving him.I t was like we had never been apart a single day of our lives.Spending those 6 days with him were amazing and yes completely selfish of me. But I have dedicated my life to you and the children for the last 16 years and never once have I been selfish its' always been about what you want and need. I relive each and every moment them everyday in my mind. I can't for us to have our happily ever after. I am leaving you at the beginning of next year, He understands that it has to be on my terms, when I leave I am not taking a damn thing with me, it is going to be a fresh start for me and the children
Confession #2844
When I was 18, I met a married man. He seemed to be nice, mannerable, helping me out--I was new to the military, he had been in the game for several years. Young and naive as I was, I didn't know that this man's being nice to me was to recruit a swing partner for him and his wife. Having been badly abused all my life, I was starved for love, starved for any form of affection, and I took it and ran with it, even though dealing with another woman on that level had never appealed to me at all before this. This went on for two years. I broke away from it, never looked back. That was twelve years ago.
Since both our jobs in the service was personnel records, he managed to find me after I'd gotten out of the service--he remained in. You can't be friends with someone you've once slept with--they'll always want it again, even if you don't. And I'll be damned, he sure tried. However, I had grown up in that time, knowing that if you truly LOVE someone like you say, number one you wouldn't cheat on your spouse, or make promises you don't intend to keep to hold onto a young, naive girl.
Now I'm getting married myself to a wonderful man here later on this year. Needless to say, I've been being stalked by the same jerk from the service. I AM NOT that naive and dumb 18 year old girl anymore. I'm 31, almost, and happy with the man I have. He treats me like a queen, gives me everything I want--the type of love you read about, but seldom find. I am NOT giving that up to go back to the bullstuff I left in the service. I refuse to allow my husband to invite others to our bed, like his current wife does--he even got a child from the current swing buddy they have! Do you honestly think I want to go through that?! Hell no! I LIKE being the center of my fiancee's world. I am his ONLY woman, and he is my ONLY man. I love him, and will walk through fire for him, and do anything to keep him. I'm not giving that up, to go back and visit a shameful part in my life because YOU can't let go. I'm not doing it.
PLEASE STOP TRYING TO FIND ME. I DON'T WANT YOU. PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE. You are NOT going to snatch my happiness away from me. You are NOT going to ruin my future marriage. I was a fool once before. I won't be that fool again.
Confession #2845
Yea, I can do everything you think I should be able to and more. But yes, it's easier with your help. You whine when I ask you for help and then wonder why I don't ask you for help. hmmm
Confession #2846
Well, I don't know about you, but when someone calls me a moron because he is frustrated he didn't find the registration to the car in the place I said it was, it doesn't help to put me in the mood. I don't know, is it just me???? LOL Seriously, it's called think before you speak, idiot.
Love??? Me
Confession #2847
I know you are lying to me about our money situation.
Confession #2848
Do you think it is a coincidence that you run off to Yoga for 6 p.m .... just when the hellish triangle of dinner, homework and evening meltdowns occur? Especially when I know of at least three other classes at the same studio at different times you could attend. But No. Always the 6 o clock class. Your selfishness amazes me.
Confession #2849
To the women of the Ohio Valley - Did you get an unexpected bouquet of lovely red roses for Valentines Day - something your partner would NEVER have bought for you and was completely unexpected? Well, that is because he stole them off of my grandmothers grave. We buried her on Feb 13th, and when my mom went back on the 14th, the three dozen roses in the arrangement were gone - plucked out. All I can say is that if this sounds like your guy, don't marry him. Please.
Confession #2850
We barely speak most days. We almost never sleep in the same bed. The sex - if we have it - is at your insistence because I have no interest in you sexually. I just want you to be done as soon as possible. Your irrational anger at small things has killed any feeling I ever had. I have endured this for nearly 20 years, and you have exhausted me. On the day of our wedding I would have never believed that I could feel nothing but irritation towards you. I loved you so much. This is what all of these small slights and hurtful words, threats and looks have led to. I don't love you anymore.
My life is completely fucked up. I have just been through a terrible trauma and what do I get? You telling me that your sister is more important then me to you. And I cant believe you have resorted to name calling. How did I get here? I thought I was marrying someone who loved me and was prince charming. You wont fuck me, its driving me crazy. Yes I have put on a few lbs since we met, but for fucking crying out loud Im still wearing a size 8! I feel so alone. That guy that I used to see everyday was the bright spot in my day. He was so good looking, and just my type. Bastard is devoted to his wife so he wont cheat, I know cause I tried to get with him. I have tried to tell you but you wont listen, if you wont give me what I want in bed I am going to find some big hunky guy that does p90x to give it to me good! Cause I need it! Ugh. What happened to that guy that couldn’t keep his hands off of me and thought I was the sexiest thing around. Remember him? He was horny all the time, I want him back! I understand people that cheat now, I never did before. I promise you that I will be married to you until the day I die, but I will probably have an affair or two….I just need a lot of male attention. I would be more than happy if it came from you, but you wont give me any attention. Wanna know how I remember the day our child was conceived? Because that day we woke up early for sex and it was really good, then on my way out the door you whistled at me. Made me feel like a million bucks all day. Why cant you do that all the time?! Dammit! I do that for you, I am always checking out your ass cause hot damn you have a great body and a spectacular ass….I want you just thinking about it. But of course I will get nothing cause you are too tired or have a cold or have a headache tonight. If you only knew how many times I have watched the p90x infomercials and……of course you wouldn’t know cause you sleep in the guest room everynight. Come to bed at the same time I do everynight and I'll rock your socks off. Wow, did I ever get off the topic here, I came here to complain about my sil but the post took a different direction…..she's a selfish bitch and her actions over the last 2 weeks have shown me her true colors. She cant even be bothered to give me a quick email to check on me to make sure Im ok. I thought we were friends and almost sisters, but I guess not. Of course this is the same woman that told me a few years ago that if it werent for my child her and the rest of the family would never want to see me again..guess I should have put the pieces together then….
Confession #2842
I don't know if its your or these pregnancy hormones, but you make me feel absolutely miserable. I mean some moments I honestly believe I HATE you. I want to scream and yell and throw things at you. But instead I go sit alone and cry and think if we made a mistake to have this baby. I feel so pathetic when our 9 year old son comes and hugs me and tells me that its ok and you sit on your lazy ass and watch tv with the damn dog. Its not his job and I feel like a bad mom because he knows this happens even when I try to hide it. Its funny how you can turn this all around to be my fault.What have I done.
Confession #2843
I can't believe that after almost 17 years, I can still love him the same, maybe because I never stopped loving him.I t was like we had never been apart a single day of our lives.Spending those 6 days with him were amazing and yes completely selfish of me. But I have dedicated my life to you and the children for the last 16 years and never once have I been selfish its' always been about what you want and need. I relive each and every moment them everyday in my mind. I can't for us to have our happily ever after. I am leaving you at the beginning of next year, He understands that it has to be on my terms, when I leave I am not taking a damn thing with me, it is going to be a fresh start for me and the children
Confession #2844
When I was 18, I met a married man. He seemed to be nice, mannerable, helping me out--I was new to the military, he had been in the game for several years. Young and naive as I was, I didn't know that this man's being nice to me was to recruit a swing partner for him and his wife. Having been badly abused all my life, I was starved for love, starved for any form of affection, and I took it and ran with it, even though dealing with another woman on that level had never appealed to me at all before this. This went on for two years. I broke away from it, never looked back. That was twelve years ago.
Since both our jobs in the service was personnel records, he managed to find me after I'd gotten out of the service--he remained in. You can't be friends with someone you've once slept with--they'll always want it again, even if you don't. And I'll be damned, he sure tried. However, I had grown up in that time, knowing that if you truly LOVE someone like you say, number one you wouldn't cheat on your spouse, or make promises you don't intend to keep to hold onto a young, naive girl.
Now I'm getting married myself to a wonderful man here later on this year. Needless to say, I've been being stalked by the same jerk from the service. I AM NOT that naive and dumb 18 year old girl anymore. I'm 31, almost, and happy with the man I have. He treats me like a queen, gives me everything I want--the type of love you read about, but seldom find. I am NOT giving that up to go back to the bullstuff I left in the service. I refuse to allow my husband to invite others to our bed, like his current wife does--he even got a child from the current swing buddy they have! Do you honestly think I want to go through that?! Hell no! I LIKE being the center of my fiancee's world. I am his ONLY woman, and he is my ONLY man. I love him, and will walk through fire for him, and do anything to keep him. I'm not giving that up, to go back and visit a shameful part in my life because YOU can't let go. I'm not doing it.
PLEASE STOP TRYING TO FIND ME. I DON'T WANT YOU. PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE. You are NOT going to snatch my happiness away from me. You are NOT going to ruin my future marriage. I was a fool once before. I won't be that fool again.
Confession #2845
Yea, I can do everything you think I should be able to and more. But yes, it's easier with your help. You whine when I ask you for help and then wonder why I don't ask you for help. hmmm
Confession #2846
Well, I don't know about you, but when someone calls me a moron because he is frustrated he didn't find the registration to the car in the place I said it was, it doesn't help to put me in the mood. I don't know, is it just me???? LOL Seriously, it's called think before you speak, idiot.
Love??? Me
Confession #2847
I know you are lying to me about our money situation.
Confession #2848
Do you think it is a coincidence that you run off to Yoga for 6 p.m .... just when the hellish triangle of dinner, homework and evening meltdowns occur? Especially when I know of at least three other classes at the same studio at different times you could attend. But No. Always the 6 o clock class. Your selfishness amazes me.
Confession #2849
To the women of the Ohio Valley - Did you get an unexpected bouquet of lovely red roses for Valentines Day - something your partner would NEVER have bought for you and was completely unexpected? Well, that is because he stole them off of my grandmothers grave. We buried her on Feb 13th, and when my mom went back on the 14th, the three dozen roses in the arrangement were gone - plucked out. All I can say is that if this sounds like your guy, don't marry him. Please.
Confession #2850
We barely speak most days. We almost never sleep in the same bed. The sex - if we have it - is at your insistence because I have no interest in you sexually. I just want you to be done as soon as possible. Your irrational anger at small things has killed any feeling I ever had. I have endured this for nearly 20 years, and you have exhausted me. On the day of our wedding I would have never believed that I could feel nothing but irritation towards you. I loved you so much. This is what all of these small slights and hurtful words, threats and looks have led to. I don't love you anymore.
Monday, March 02, 2009
True Wife Confessions 284 Poetic Licenses
Confession #2831
this weekend was everything I wanted and more. As I told you before I went to see you, my relationship with the husband is not all that great we are friendly but over friendly to each other, the whole time I was with you he called a total of 4 times.
I am so unhappy by his side, and with you, I am complete. I have decided to move back home, but I have to do it on my conditions, I will not take a dime from him.
THANK YOU AMOR for this weekend it was the best but I know that the rest of our lives will be even better
Confession #2832
I never expected that falling out of love would be so fucking painful. It isn't as if we didn't see it coming. Two decades we have been together and the indifference of that past 4 years has simply grown. I thought that the feeling of just not wanting to be with you, not wanting you to touch me WAS the painful part. No. It seems that for the past two weeks, the pain I am feeling must be part of the ending of our marriage. I feel like I am hacking off a limb to save the rest of me. There will be no dramatic fight to end it between us. Just me trying to find enough energy to do the humane thing.
Confession #2833
I've finally gotten an offer for a better job - a much, much better job, with a large raise, better working conditions, and a chance to advance - and I'm scared to death to take it. The main reason is because of you. We've worked the same hours since we've been together - five years - which allows us to spend lots of time together. Now we will have at least 2 or 3 fewer hours per day to be together, which I hate. I think you fee the same way I do - you want me to take the job, but you don't like the change in schedule. It also means our daughter will be at daycare an extra hour every day, which makes me feel extremely sad and guilty. I'm afraid that mine and your relationship will suffer, and that our daughter will suffer as well. So what do I do? Take the job and pray everything goes well and we all adjust? Or stay in this dead-end, low-paying job I have now?
Confession #2834
I made out with a guy I work with this weekend. I wanted to do alot more than that with him, but didn't. I secretly wanted to fuck you yesterday just so I could pretend it was him.
Confession #2835
Dearest co-irker,
I am done with you stealing my ideas, taking credit for my work and trying to make me look bad in front of our principal. As a result, I will now be spitting in your coffee mug and water bottle every available chance I get. While I realize this is neither mature nor professional, it makes me feel so much better. This may be the only time in my life that I hope I get a horrendous stomach bug so that I can pass it on to you.
Sincerely,
Your T.A.
Confession #2836
At first, it was good but now it just sucks. I wait a month for you to come home from work and when you do, it is all about you! I hate it when your fat ass climbs on top of me! Your panting sickens me! You come home from work and when you do you stay gone and visit and help everyone else. You say you are outside “working” but for some reason nothing ever gets done! Why is it that I do everything to get your attention and I am always doing what YOU want to do just so I can spend time with you! I take a bath every night, shave my legs and get my hair done to look good for you. I worry if I turn you on like those sluts in your porn videos! When it comes to sex, you expect me to suck your dick and for me to get on top to do all the work! You do nothing for me! I just moan and fake it so I can just get it over. Have I ever had an orgasm with you??? You were drunk for all of our marriage and now that you have “quit” for 6 months, you expect me to fall deep in love with you again…. Ha, that is a load of bullshit! Everything that you put me through with your drunken ass is ridiculous. Well who cares that you finally quit. How about that time you knocked me around when you were drunk or all the times you had sex with me when you were so drunk you couldn’t even find where to put it or get it up! Yes, I know… you have changed and you are now sober and you are a great father! Our kids always come first but I am alone! ! We have two beautiful kids that need their father so I stay. I am sorry for my feeling. You still do not see me! You have pushed me aside for too long. If you have to pick up around the house, you bitch and whine that you work and make the money. I may not work for money but keeping house and two kids IS work asshole! You try cooking, cleaning, ironing, changing diapers, and driving our son to soccer practice everyday! Why can’t you just pay attention to me as much as you do everything and everyone else! I need to have an orgasm with a man that wants to have sex with me! I want to fuck someone else SOOOO bad and I have and I am sorry! He makes me feel beautiful. He looks at me like I am perfect and he wants me! He actually wants to pleasure me and touch me, and NOT only spit on his dick to get it wet so he can get off. As you have pointed out before I have no money so how would I take care of myself! You stupid bastard! I actually do love you deep down and I can’t leave you can I? Damn why can’t it just be different!
Confession #2837
Dear Husband,
So I come yesterday and things are weird around the house, shelve in closet total mess, my drawers are messed up, your drawer is falling out of track. Then when I ask you about all these things you say you have no idea. You are the only one home besides the animals. You were looking for something and won’t tell me what. It totally pissed me off to no end that you won’t just admit that you were. Not to mention we haven’t had sex in two weeks from today. I need it, I want it. What is wrong with you stupid? Don’t you understand that after like day four of now having I am become a bitch because I want it that much. SO….. all the little annoying things you do become that much more annoying to me and I want to kill you. Get a clue and figure out what your wife wants before you drive her totally crazy.
The ocd bitch
Confession #2838
Our son couldn't sit in your lap at the circus, because your belly was sitting there instead. He sat in my lap instead. He had his own seat... he just wanted to snuggle close for a minute and share his excitement and wonder with someone. He was practically thrumming with the overwhelming joy of a four-year-old at his first circus, and I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tight while I cried for you, very quietly, into his hair. You missed that, and you will never have another chance. I know the decades of overeating, overcompensating, and neglect of self have not given you the joy that that moment would have...but I don't know how to help you let it go. I feel so much sadness and despair for you, but I don't know how to help. I think you're the only one who can fix it. Until you can, it will sit in your lap instead of your little boy.
Confession #2839
My beloved child asked me...Mom just how much longer are you going to put up with this.....I told her I didn't know.
Now....
When I first met you, you were so healthy and robust,loving and caring, then things happened and you got sick, I moved my family to a new city and proceeded to care for you regardless how ugly it got, you lost your limb and I still stuck by you, I explained that love was unconditional,and I was going to love you regardless, We have been together for a few years now and you have turned 180 degrees, Your moods change, you started getting angry over little thing,you instigate arguments with me or the kids, You know these kids are awesome! they all make straight A's they are very generous with their time and their heart,they aren't hanging out in the streets,they aren't in any gangs, they even have their futures planned, but you look for their faults,you dig until you find something they forgot to do or left out, its just so sad.
Your family welcomed us with open arms and included us in all the family activities when we first arrived, I felt so blessed to have a new family, it was wonderful,then when we started arguing and fighting you started complaining to your family and now they treat us differently, no more family activities, we are pretty much ignored, I miss our get together's, I miss seeing them, I know you call them when you feel I have somehow mistreated you, But you know some women can only take so much and now I'm tired, I'm tired of our arguments, I'm tired of having to defend my kids with you, I'm tired of you calling me selfish and ugly, if things don't change and you start treating me and the kids differently its all going to end, I'm going to ask you to leave, and not come back .Maybe I am better off by myself with my kids, I'll keep going to work, I'll keep coming home and cooking dinner,I'll keep doing the laundry and keeping the house clean, but this time it will be for me and the kids and not for you. Maybe you won't care if you lose your "family" but the kids have grown to love you and they are going to care, they are going to miss you, and they are going to hurt, and it will be because of you.
Love...Me
Confession #2840
Hey.....we need to talk. Here we are,married 23 years,
two great kids away at college,this should be OUR time
to enjoy each other........but you don't even notice me.
Your too busy with Nascar and football, hockey, and
even GOLF for crying outloud !!! That and most of
a twelve pack everynite. When I told you I needed a
little company, you started bringing your idiot friends
home to drink beer and watch the game.
So I started going upstairs to read and play on the
computer. I found all of your porn.....Why won't
you do these things with your wife?? I come down-
stairs tuesday. and your helper is on the couch. He
lost his license, and you are too drunk to take him
home after monday night football. It was driving
me crazy,but you kept bringing him.
Well,I don't care if Carl spends Monday nights
on our couch anymore.Because when you stagger
up to bed and start snoring,I sneak down to the
family room and suck his cock. He don't mind at all........
I've done this 8 or 9 times !!! You don't have a
clue.
I bought you a fishing pole for your birthday.The
next day, you bring Carl home to see it. While I
was doing the dishes, you went to the basement
to play with your pole.I got on my knees in front
of the sink and played with Carl's......when you
called up the steps for him to bring you a beer,
he said, 'hold on, I'm coming....' And he was....
In your WIFES MOUTH, YOU ASS !!!!
The next time you pass out on the recliner,
I am goin to let him fuck me.....right in front
you.....Maybe THEN you'll wake up and pay
attention to me.........
this weekend was everything I wanted and more. As I told you before I went to see you, my relationship with the husband is not all that great we are friendly but over friendly to each other, the whole time I was with you he called a total of 4 times.
I am so unhappy by his side, and with you, I am complete. I have decided to move back home, but I have to do it on my conditions, I will not take a dime from him.
THANK YOU AMOR for this weekend it was the best but I know that the rest of our lives will be even better
Confession #2832
I never expected that falling out of love would be so fucking painful. It isn't as if we didn't see it coming. Two decades we have been together and the indifference of that past 4 years has simply grown. I thought that the feeling of just not wanting to be with you, not wanting you to touch me WAS the painful part. No. It seems that for the past two weeks, the pain I am feeling must be part of the ending of our marriage. I feel like I am hacking off a limb to save the rest of me. There will be no dramatic fight to end it between us. Just me trying to find enough energy to do the humane thing.
Confession #2833
I've finally gotten an offer for a better job - a much, much better job, with a large raise, better working conditions, and a chance to advance - and I'm scared to death to take it. The main reason is because of you. We've worked the same hours since we've been together - five years - which allows us to spend lots of time together. Now we will have at least 2 or 3 fewer hours per day to be together, which I hate. I think you fee the same way I do - you want me to take the job, but you don't like the change in schedule. It also means our daughter will be at daycare an extra hour every day, which makes me feel extremely sad and guilty. I'm afraid that mine and your relationship will suffer, and that our daughter will suffer as well. So what do I do? Take the job and pray everything goes well and we all adjust? Or stay in this dead-end, low-paying job I have now?
Confession #2834
I made out with a guy I work with this weekend. I wanted to do alot more than that with him, but didn't. I secretly wanted to fuck you yesterday just so I could pretend it was him.
Confession #2835
Dearest co-irker,
I am done with you stealing my ideas, taking credit for my work and trying to make me look bad in front of our principal. As a result, I will now be spitting in your coffee mug and water bottle every available chance I get. While I realize this is neither mature nor professional, it makes me feel so much better. This may be the only time in my life that I hope I get a horrendous stomach bug so that I can pass it on to you.
Sincerely,
Your T.A.
Confession #2836
At first, it was good but now it just sucks. I wait a month for you to come home from work and when you do, it is all about you! I hate it when your fat ass climbs on top of me! Your panting sickens me! You come home from work and when you do you stay gone and visit and help everyone else. You say you are outside “working” but for some reason nothing ever gets done! Why is it that I do everything to get your attention and I am always doing what YOU want to do just so I can spend time with you! I take a bath every night, shave my legs and get my hair done to look good for you. I worry if I turn you on like those sluts in your porn videos! When it comes to sex, you expect me to suck your dick and for me to get on top to do all the work! You do nothing for me! I just moan and fake it so I can just get it over. Have I ever had an orgasm with you??? You were drunk for all of our marriage and now that you have “quit” for 6 months, you expect me to fall deep in love with you again…. Ha, that is a load of bullshit! Everything that you put me through with your drunken ass is ridiculous. Well who cares that you finally quit. How about that time you knocked me around when you were drunk or all the times you had sex with me when you were so drunk you couldn’t even find where to put it or get it up! Yes, I know… you have changed and you are now sober and you are a great father! Our kids always come first but I am alone! ! We have two beautiful kids that need their father so I stay. I am sorry for my feeling. You still do not see me! You have pushed me aside for too long. If you have to pick up around the house, you bitch and whine that you work and make the money. I may not work for money but keeping house and two kids IS work asshole! You try cooking, cleaning, ironing, changing diapers, and driving our son to soccer practice everyday! Why can’t you just pay attention to me as much as you do everything and everyone else! I need to have an orgasm with a man that wants to have sex with me! I want to fuck someone else SOOOO bad and I have and I am sorry! He makes me feel beautiful. He looks at me like I am perfect and he wants me! He actually wants to pleasure me and touch me, and NOT only spit on his dick to get it wet so he can get off. As you have pointed out before I have no money so how would I take care of myself! You stupid bastard! I actually do love you deep down and I can’t leave you can I? Damn why can’t it just be different!
Confession #2837
Dear Husband,
So I come yesterday and things are weird around the house, shelve in closet total mess, my drawers are messed up, your drawer is falling out of track. Then when I ask you about all these things you say you have no idea. You are the only one home besides the animals. You were looking for something and won’t tell me what. It totally pissed me off to no end that you won’t just admit that you were. Not to mention we haven’t had sex in two weeks from today. I need it, I want it. What is wrong with you stupid? Don’t you understand that after like day four of now having I am become a bitch because I want it that much. SO….. all the little annoying things you do become that much more annoying to me and I want to kill you. Get a clue and figure out what your wife wants before you drive her totally crazy.
The ocd bitch
Confession #2838
Our son couldn't sit in your lap at the circus, because your belly was sitting there instead. He sat in my lap instead. He had his own seat... he just wanted to snuggle close for a minute and share his excitement and wonder with someone. He was practically thrumming with the overwhelming joy of a four-year-old at his first circus, and I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tight while I cried for you, very quietly, into his hair. You missed that, and you will never have another chance. I know the decades of overeating, overcompensating, and neglect of self have not given you the joy that that moment would have...but I don't know how to help you let it go. I feel so much sadness and despair for you, but I don't know how to help. I think you're the only one who can fix it. Until you can, it will sit in your lap instead of your little boy.
Confession #2839
My beloved child asked me...Mom just how much longer are you going to put up with this.....I told her I didn't know.
Now....
When I first met you, you were so healthy and robust,loving and caring, then things happened and you got sick, I moved my family to a new city and proceeded to care for you regardless how ugly it got, you lost your limb and I still stuck by you, I explained that love was unconditional,and I was going to love you regardless, We have been together for a few years now and you have turned 180 degrees, Your moods change, you started getting angry over little thing,you instigate arguments with me or the kids, You know these kids are awesome! they all make straight A's they are very generous with their time and their heart,they aren't hanging out in the streets,they aren't in any gangs, they even have their futures planned, but you look for their faults,you dig until you find something they forgot to do or left out, its just so sad.
Your family welcomed us with open arms and included us in all the family activities when we first arrived, I felt so blessed to have a new family, it was wonderful,then when we started arguing and fighting you started complaining to your family and now they treat us differently, no more family activities, we are pretty much ignored, I miss our get together's, I miss seeing them, I know you call them when you feel I have somehow mistreated you, But you know some women can only take so much and now I'm tired, I'm tired of our arguments, I'm tired of having to defend my kids with you, I'm tired of you calling me selfish and ugly, if things don't change and you start treating me and the kids differently its all going to end, I'm going to ask you to leave, and not come back .Maybe I am better off by myself with my kids, I'll keep going to work, I'll keep coming home and cooking dinner,I'll keep doing the laundry and keeping the house clean, but this time it will be for me and the kids and not for you. Maybe you won't care if you lose your "family" but the kids have grown to love you and they are going to care, they are going to miss you, and they are going to hurt, and it will be because of you.
Love...Me
Confession #2840
Hey.....we need to talk. Here we are,married 23 years,
two great kids away at college,this should be OUR time
to enjoy each other........but you don't even notice me.
Your too busy with Nascar and football, hockey, and
even GOLF for crying outloud !!! That and most of
a twelve pack everynite. When I told you I needed a
little company, you started bringing your idiot friends
home to drink beer and watch the game.
So I started going upstairs to read and play on the
computer. I found all of your porn.....Why won't
you do these things with your wife?? I come down-
stairs tuesday. and your helper is on the couch. He
lost his license, and you are too drunk to take him
home after monday night football. It was driving
me crazy,but you kept bringing him.
Well,I don't care if Carl spends Monday nights
on our couch anymore.Because when you stagger
up to bed and start snoring,I sneak down to the
family room and suck his cock. He don't mind at all........
I've done this 8 or 9 times !!! You don't have a
clue.
I bought you a fishing pole for your birthday.The
next day, you bring Carl home to see it. While I
was doing the dishes, you went to the basement
to play with your pole.I got on my knees in front
of the sink and played with Carl's......when you
called up the steps for him to bring you a beer,
he said, 'hold on, I'm coming....' And he was....
In your WIFES MOUTH, YOU ASS !!!!
The next time you pass out on the recliner,
I am goin to let him fuck me.....right in front
you.....Maybe THEN you'll wake up and pay
attention to me.........
Monday, February 23, 2009
True Wife Confessions 283 tea leaves
Confession # 2821
Every time you are rude to me, it takes me longer to fall back in love with you.
Confession # 2822
Today, for the first time in over a decade, you actually acknowledged how hard I work - at my job, at parenting, in our home. I wish you had done this so much sooner. It could have repaired some of the damage that has happened in our marriage.
Confession # 2823
I have been married to you for 25 years, the first 13 were spent with you drinking day in and day out. You have never made love to me sober. For the past 13 years you haven't even touched me. Yes I am screwing around on you and no I don't feel bad about It. Yes It's with someone you know very well and no you will never find out. No I will never divorce your stupid ass I have way to much invested in you to do that. So I will just sit back and enjoy making love to one of your closet family members.
Confession # 2824
I think you finally killed my libido.
Confession # 2825
Sometimes I dread when you travel for work, as you want to have sex as soon as you get home. I appreciate the thought, but I am exhausted from parenting alone. When you start to climb on me too I just want to scream and run out the door.
Confession # 2826
I hate that you fall asleep on the couch when we only have two evenings together a week
Confession # 2827
Just because you work and I dont doens't mean you can treat me like shit. I am not your slave either. You think your the man and your job is so hard and that I get to sit at home and watch tv all day. Well guess what that is not fun and not what I do. First I take care of our son, do the chores like laundry, dishes, clean, pay the bill, and just about everything else since you won't do shit. You bitch about taking out the trash. All you have to worry about is yourself and you can't even take a shower everyday. I can't have friends come over because you bitch about that and say you cant trust me. I have never done shit to you. Everything is my fault I am the bitch and your fucking perfect. If I dont remember to wash YOUR clothes I have to hear how I dont love you and I am such a horrible wife. I cook dinner and you say how your tired of chicken or you don't want what I am making but I don't see you in there ever trying to cook. I really hate you and wish I had the finances so I could leave your ass. I have never felt so insecure, worthless, or depressed in my life. Go to hell.
Confession # 2828
Dear lover, I confess. I know you take Viagra. I found one of your pills wrapped in foil on the floor of my bedroom. It must have fallen out of your pocket one night when we got naked. I'm torn as to whether or not to tell you I know. Obviously, you don't want me to know, or you would have told me yourself. So do I keep it to myself? And let both of us continue the charade? Your telling me I make you hard? Me knowing that it's not just me, but that drug enhancements are playing a part? Or do I tell you and risk your not being able to handle that I know?
The fact that you take it really doesn't matter to me. I love you no matter what. But you think sex is so very important to me. It's really not, though I enjoy it tremendously with you. Important, yes, but the companionship we share is oh so much more important. I want a lot of sex because I know it's important to *you*. It's not really for me, but for you. I'm scared that your ego would be shattered if I told you what I know and you could no longer keep up the charade.
Unfortunately, having secrets creates distance. Opening up and potentially being vulnerable creates closeness. I'd much rather have closeness than distance. So I'm torn.
What to do? Help!
Confession # 2829
Sometimes I need to be touched when it has nothing to do with sex. It's not just kissing that I miss, although I do miss that a lot. Little things are important, too. Holding hands, playing footsie under the table and cuddling are things I want and need on a regular basis. And when I'm upset, I need the man who is supposed to love me to actually make the effort to put his arms around me and comfort me. I've told you this so many times before that I don't want to say it ever again.
When I am already feeling vulnerable and I have to beg you to comfort me, it may make you feel powerful, but it just makes me wonder why I married such an asshole. You need to start paying a bit more attention to my needs or I'm going to take the kids and finally leave you. There is more to being a husband and father than just providing a paycheck. I've told you this before, but you never seem to believe me.
I know you read this blog. I'm hoping that seeing it spelled out in black and white will finally make you wake up and realize what you are throwing away.
Confession # 2830
I hate my life today.
I hate the time the kids take. I hate all the housework. I hate that you have a pinched nerve in your neck that you won't get looked at. I hate that you wake up in the middle of the night in pain, making me get up in the middle of the night to pat your back and ask if you need anything. I hate that you don't have the balls to insist on the raise you're entitled to but DO have the balls to ask me if I want you to interview for a job 1,000 miles away.
This fucking sucks.
Every time you are rude to me, it takes me longer to fall back in love with you.
Confession # 2822
Today, for the first time in over a decade, you actually acknowledged how hard I work - at my job, at parenting, in our home. I wish you had done this so much sooner. It could have repaired some of the damage that has happened in our marriage.
Confession # 2823
I have been married to you for 25 years, the first 13 were spent with you drinking day in and day out. You have never made love to me sober. For the past 13 years you haven't even touched me. Yes I am screwing around on you and no I don't feel bad about It. Yes It's with someone you know very well and no you will never find out. No I will never divorce your stupid ass I have way to much invested in you to do that. So I will just sit back and enjoy making love to one of your closet family members.
Confession # 2824
I think you finally killed my libido.
Confession # 2825
Sometimes I dread when you travel for work, as you want to have sex as soon as you get home. I appreciate the thought, but I am exhausted from parenting alone. When you start to climb on me too I just want to scream and run out the door.
Confession # 2826
I hate that you fall asleep on the couch when we only have two evenings together a week
Confession # 2827
Just because you work and I dont doens't mean you can treat me like shit. I am not your slave either. You think your the man and your job is so hard and that I get to sit at home and watch tv all day. Well guess what that is not fun and not what I do. First I take care of our son, do the chores like laundry, dishes, clean, pay the bill, and just about everything else since you won't do shit. You bitch about taking out the trash. All you have to worry about is yourself and you can't even take a shower everyday. I can't have friends come over because you bitch about that and say you cant trust me. I have never done shit to you. Everything is my fault I am the bitch and your fucking perfect. If I dont remember to wash YOUR clothes I have to hear how I dont love you and I am such a horrible wife. I cook dinner and you say how your tired of chicken or you don't want what I am making but I don't see you in there ever trying to cook. I really hate you and wish I had the finances so I could leave your ass. I have never felt so insecure, worthless, or depressed in my life. Go to hell.
Confession # 2828
Dear lover, I confess. I know you take Viagra. I found one of your pills wrapped in foil on the floor of my bedroom. It must have fallen out of your pocket one night when we got naked. I'm torn as to whether or not to tell you I know. Obviously, you don't want me to know, or you would have told me yourself. So do I keep it to myself? And let both of us continue the charade? Your telling me I make you hard? Me knowing that it's not just me, but that drug enhancements are playing a part? Or do I tell you and risk your not being able to handle that I know?
The fact that you take it really doesn't matter to me. I love you no matter what. But you think sex is so very important to me. It's really not, though I enjoy it tremendously with you. Important, yes, but the companionship we share is oh so much more important. I want a lot of sex because I know it's important to *you*. It's not really for me, but for you. I'm scared that your ego would be shattered if I told you what I know and you could no longer keep up the charade.
Unfortunately, having secrets creates distance. Opening up and potentially being vulnerable creates closeness. I'd much rather have closeness than distance. So I'm torn.
What to do? Help!
Confession # 2829
Sometimes I need to be touched when it has nothing to do with sex. It's not just kissing that I miss, although I do miss that a lot. Little things are important, too. Holding hands, playing footsie under the table and cuddling are things I want and need on a regular basis. And when I'm upset, I need the man who is supposed to love me to actually make the effort to put his arms around me and comfort me. I've told you this so many times before that I don't want to say it ever again.
When I am already feeling vulnerable and I have to beg you to comfort me, it may make you feel powerful, but it just makes me wonder why I married such an asshole. You need to start paying a bit more attention to my needs or I'm going to take the kids and finally leave you. There is more to being a husband and father than just providing a paycheck. I've told you this before, but you never seem to believe me.
I know you read this blog. I'm hoping that seeing it spelled out in black and white will finally make you wake up and realize what you are throwing away.
Confession # 2830
I hate my life today.
I hate the time the kids take. I hate all the housework. I hate that you have a pinched nerve in your neck that you won't get looked at. I hate that you wake up in the middle of the night in pain, making me get up in the middle of the night to pat your back and ask if you need anything. I hate that you don't have the balls to insist on the raise you're entitled to but DO have the balls to ask me if I want you to interview for a job 1,000 miles away.
This fucking sucks.
Monday, February 16, 2009
True Wife Confessions 282 rose petals
Confession #2811
If you want to complain about a nagging wife, too many demands on your time, and dull life in the suburbs -- you shouldn't have married a happy-go-lucky artist, had no major obligations, and moved into a barn surrounded by trees. It's as though you are following some script about what men should be enraged about. But it doesn't apply. How do you think I feel? Your friends envy you for having an easy-going, cheerful wife and they look baffled when you tell me to "stop nagging." Is handing you a cool poem and suggesting we go to your favorite ice cream place "nagging"? I feel like your friends see me more clearly than you do. Does it make you feel grown-up to have things to complain about, so you make them up? Soon enough there will be actual obligations, like children, so why can't we just enjoy this time?
Confession #2812
sometimes i wish you'd put yourself in my pair of shoes while we have sex, and try to get off watching some emaciated fuckface ram his pecker into me. maybe you'd actually understand why i refuse to fuck anymore.
Confession #2813
Dear Heartbreaker,
Not too long ago our marriage was on the rocks. I was ready to take our daughter and move to another state to get away from you. You were distant and detached. I was miserable and depressed. We were not the people we were when we met and got together.
I am so glad now that I stuck around and waited it out. You have made a complete turn around change and in turn I have too. You tell me that the baby has changed your life; that you see our family and you want nothing more than us. When I told you we were having baby number 2, your face lit up and I feel in love with you all over again. You’re affectionate and attentive. You are awesome with our daughter. You take time to do little things that make me feel special and appreciated. What I love the most is when this morning I was bitching at you about the computer, you very wittingly turned the situation around and made me laugh. Unlike the past, you did not decide to fight with me, you de-escalated the situation and my frustration melted away. I know I am hormonal on account of baking this baby, and you have really stepped up to the plate this time. So thank you. I appreciate you and the changes you have made. I love you. Para Siempre Mi Amor.
Till another time,
-Formerly- Hurting Heart
Confession #2814
I have been reading about radical feminist lesbian separatists on my
computer. Not because I'm a lesbian, but because it is the best mental
escape from you. Then I get up and cook you dinner and laugh at your
jokes and watch the movie you choose and tell you in bed what you want
to hear.
Confession #2815
We haven't had sex for a year. First you were concerned about hurting the baby, but I've had the "all clear" from the dr. for some months now and you still won't touch me. I figured you were asexual but the other night I caught you looking at porn. Am I really that disgusting that you'd rather beat off to porn than have sex with your wife? I lost all the baby weight, so why don't you want to fuck?
Confession #2816
in comparison to my 5'4, you are about 6'2 with.....well, all that workout time has turned you into some kind of BEAST! and when the TIME comes.....all that power sends me to goddamn heaven! you blow my mind!
Confession #2817
You don't want to go to the events I am excited about. But you don't want me to "leave" you and go alone or with a friend. When I stay home you say you are "bored being at home" -- but you don't have any suggestions for activities or places you'd want to go. I booked us for that class because I thought you would like it. On the way there, you starting your negative talk, decided it would be lame, and said you'd skip it and just wait for me outside. That hurt. I was trying to do something inspiring and positive for us. Tonight when I tried to make up and asked if you wanted to watch the new Netflix you said "Not really." I asked why and you said "Because I don't know anything about it." Your tone was antagonistic. I went upstairs and cried. I'm at my wit's end. My heart is full of love and optimism, but nothing around me seems to support it. I feel like it's true what they say: the guy is up for everything when he's wooing you. Then once you're married, he changes. Now I understand why most community education classes are filled with lonely looking married women. And I can't even enjoy being out there on my own since I know you're at home pouting that I'm not spending time with you.
Confession #2818
I am a complete and utter idiot for marrying my now ex-husband. We had a child, that he completely ignored and now I am faced with the hatred I feel because he says he wants to close that ugly chapter in his life and our child is nothing more than a child support debt to him. How dare he think of my boy that way. He doesn't deserve to breathe, or maybe I don't for having a child with such a loser.
Thank goodness for my current husband or I would be on a plane to California to hurt, maim or kill the ex. Grrrrrrrrr.
Confession #2819
Dear Boyfriend,
I hate your beard. It's such a turn-off that kissing you has become almost unbearable. When you're clean-shaven you're one of the hottest men I've ever known, but now I can barely muster up the desire to have sex with you. I ask you every day to please shave, but you laugh as though I'm just kidding. It makes you look dirty, unprofessional, and about 10 years older. Please give me my hot boyfriend back!
Confession #2820
When you go to bed with a ‘headache’ right at the kids’ bathtime, I purposely leave the hall light on and get the kiddos extra ramped-up so they’ll be loud. You don’t have a headache, you just don’t like to bathe the children.
If you want to complain about a nagging wife, too many demands on your time, and dull life in the suburbs -- you shouldn't have married a happy-go-lucky artist, had no major obligations, and moved into a barn surrounded by trees. It's as though you are following some script about what men should be enraged about. But it doesn't apply. How do you think I feel? Your friends envy you for having an easy-going, cheerful wife and they look baffled when you tell me to "stop nagging." Is handing you a cool poem and suggesting we go to your favorite ice cream place "nagging"? I feel like your friends see me more clearly than you do. Does it make you feel grown-up to have things to complain about, so you make them up? Soon enough there will be actual obligations, like children, so why can't we just enjoy this time?
Confession #2812
sometimes i wish you'd put yourself in my pair of shoes while we have sex, and try to get off watching some emaciated fuckface ram his pecker into me. maybe you'd actually understand why i refuse to fuck anymore.
Confession #2813
Dear Heartbreaker,
Not too long ago our marriage was on the rocks. I was ready to take our daughter and move to another state to get away from you. You were distant and detached. I was miserable and depressed. We were not the people we were when we met and got together.
I am so glad now that I stuck around and waited it out. You have made a complete turn around change and in turn I have too. You tell me that the baby has changed your life; that you see our family and you want nothing more than us. When I told you we were having baby number 2, your face lit up and I feel in love with you all over again. You’re affectionate and attentive. You are awesome with our daughter. You take time to do little things that make me feel special and appreciated. What I love the most is when this morning I was bitching at you about the computer, you very wittingly turned the situation around and made me laugh. Unlike the past, you did not decide to fight with me, you de-escalated the situation and my frustration melted away. I know I am hormonal on account of baking this baby, and you have really stepped up to the plate this time. So thank you. I appreciate you and the changes you have made. I love you. Para Siempre Mi Amor.
Till another time,
-Formerly- Hurting Heart
Confession #2814
I have been reading about radical feminist lesbian separatists on my
computer. Not because I'm a lesbian, but because it is the best mental
escape from you. Then I get up and cook you dinner and laugh at your
jokes and watch the movie you choose and tell you in bed what you want
to hear.
Confession #2815
We haven't had sex for a year. First you were concerned about hurting the baby, but I've had the "all clear" from the dr. for some months now and you still won't touch me. I figured you were asexual but the other night I caught you looking at porn. Am I really that disgusting that you'd rather beat off to porn than have sex with your wife? I lost all the baby weight, so why don't you want to fuck?
Confession #2816
in comparison to my 5'4, you are about 6'2 with.....well, all that workout time has turned you into some kind of BEAST! and when the TIME comes.....all that power sends me to goddamn heaven! you blow my mind!
Confession #2817
You don't want to go to the events I am excited about. But you don't want me to "leave" you and go alone or with a friend. When I stay home you say you are "bored being at home" -- but you don't have any suggestions for activities or places you'd want to go. I booked us for that class because I thought you would like it. On the way there, you starting your negative talk, decided it would be lame, and said you'd skip it and just wait for me outside. That hurt. I was trying to do something inspiring and positive for us. Tonight when I tried to make up and asked if you wanted to watch the new Netflix you said "Not really." I asked why and you said "Because I don't know anything about it." Your tone was antagonistic. I went upstairs and cried. I'm at my wit's end. My heart is full of love and optimism, but nothing around me seems to support it. I feel like it's true what they say: the guy is up for everything when he's wooing you. Then once you're married, he changes. Now I understand why most community education classes are filled with lonely looking married women. And I can't even enjoy being out there on my own since I know you're at home pouting that I'm not spending time with you.
Confession #2818
I am a complete and utter idiot for marrying my now ex-husband. We had a child, that he completely ignored and now I am faced with the hatred I feel because he says he wants to close that ugly chapter in his life and our child is nothing more than a child support debt to him. How dare he think of my boy that way. He doesn't deserve to breathe, or maybe I don't for having a child with such a loser.
Thank goodness for my current husband or I would be on a plane to California to hurt, maim or kill the ex. Grrrrrrrrr.
Confession #2819
Dear Boyfriend,
I hate your beard. It's such a turn-off that kissing you has become almost unbearable. When you're clean-shaven you're one of the hottest men I've ever known, but now I can barely muster up the desire to have sex with you. I ask you every day to please shave, but you laugh as though I'm just kidding. It makes you look dirty, unprofessional, and about 10 years older. Please give me my hot boyfriend back!
Confession #2820
When you go to bed with a ‘headache’ right at the kids’ bathtime, I purposely leave the hall light on and get the kiddos extra ramped-up so they’ll be loud. You don’t have a headache, you just don’t like to bathe the children.
Monday, February 09, 2009
True Wife Confessions Zero Zero Niner
Confession #081
I hate that I'm always the one to get up in the middle of the night to see what the dogs are barking at. It's dark out there and we don't have any neighbors to jump in to save me while you're snoring away. You're the one with the fancy new hunting rifle and super-duper hunting skills, and I'm the one with the MagLite flashlight.
Who would you rather have protecting us in the dead of the night?
Confession #082
When you want to order pizza, I know that you ask me if I want anything from the store. If I say "Yes" then you will try to get me to call the order in AND pick it up. What's up with the food ordering phobia? I caught on to this about 12 years ago, so don't think that you're getting away with anything.
Confession #083
Why do you pretend like you have anything to do with Christmas cards? We ALL know that it is me who buys, addresses, writes, stamps and otherwise takes cares of the christmas cards - including the god damn holiday photo of child. When I hear you on the phone taking credit for these cards I want to pop you in the nose. I challenge you to even DESCRIBE what the cards look like this year... I thought not.
Confession #084
When you have to be alone with our child for any length of time, you always act incredibly put upon when I get home. Suck it up. The eye rolling and heavy breathing is not needed to impress upon me that she sucks the life force out of you. I GET it.
Confession #085
I always have an orgasm when I do it myself . I almost always fake it with you . You always start off so great but get too impatient . Then I just fake it to get it over with .
Confession #086
I know this is hypocritical, since I'm not lighting up the runways with my supermodel body, but since you've gained so much weight, I'm just not that attracted to you anymore.
Confession #087
Let's face it-- we both know I am much, much handier than you are with a hammer, a screwdriver, or a saw, but I bite my tongue and let you put together most of the new furniture and do random projects around the house because I know it hurts your manly pride to admit your wife is better with tools than you are. After you hung the curtains in the baby's room, I went and re-hung them so that they would hang straight, and spackled over the old holes long before you got home from work so you'd never know. And I also fixed our new headboard after you put the wrong screws in the frame
Confession #088
I am far more experienced in the art of providing oral sex than I have led you to believe.
Confession #089
I hate that you keep our house shut up like a tomb in the summer and run the a/c continually with out ever letting any fresh air in
Confession #090
I know that you used to give me liquor for every "event" like a birthday or Christmas, or valentines day, because the liquor store is on the drive home and you couldn't be bothered to buy anything ahead of time. Either that, or you were trying to drive me to alcoholism.
I hate that I'm always the one to get up in the middle of the night to see what the dogs are barking at. It's dark out there and we don't have any neighbors to jump in to save me while you're snoring away. You're the one with the fancy new hunting rifle and super-duper hunting skills, and I'm the one with the MagLite flashlight.
Who would you rather have protecting us in the dead of the night?
Confession #082
When you want to order pizza, I know that you ask me if I want anything from the store. If I say "Yes" then you will try to get me to call the order in AND pick it up. What's up with the food ordering phobia? I caught on to this about 12 years ago, so don't think that you're getting away with anything.
Confession #083
Why do you pretend like you have anything to do with Christmas cards? We ALL know that it is me who buys, addresses, writes, stamps and otherwise takes cares of the christmas cards - including the god damn holiday photo of child. When I hear you on the phone taking credit for these cards I want to pop you in the nose. I challenge you to even DESCRIBE what the cards look like this year... I thought not.
Confession #084
When you have to be alone with our child for any length of time, you always act incredibly put upon when I get home. Suck it up. The eye rolling and heavy breathing is not needed to impress upon me that she sucks the life force out of you. I GET it.
Confession #085
I always have an orgasm when I do it myself . I almost always fake it with you . You always start off so great but get too impatient . Then I just fake it to get it over with .
Confession #086
I know this is hypocritical, since I'm not lighting up the runways with my supermodel body, but since you've gained so much weight, I'm just not that attracted to you anymore.
Confession #087
Let's face it-- we both know I am much, much handier than you are with a hammer, a screwdriver, or a saw, but I bite my tongue and let you put together most of the new furniture and do random projects around the house because I know it hurts your manly pride to admit your wife is better with tools than you are. After you hung the curtains in the baby's room, I went and re-hung them so that they would hang straight, and spackled over the old holes long before you got home from work so you'd never know. And I also fixed our new headboard after you put the wrong screws in the frame
Confession #088
I am far more experienced in the art of providing oral sex than I have led you to believe.
Confession #089
I hate that you keep our house shut up like a tomb in the summer and run the a/c continually with out ever letting any fresh air in
Confession #090
I know that you used to give me liquor for every "event" like a birthday or Christmas, or valentines day, because the liquor store is on the drive home and you couldn't be bothered to buy anything ahead of time. Either that, or you were trying to drive me to alcoholism.
Friday, February 06, 2009
Second Chance
If you weren't aware of the Envisage 365 project...then you should be.
Last summer, I was contacted by Sarah - one of the TWC community - to ask if I would post her idea to start a blog made up of women from everywhere. Women who would take a picture everyday and send it to her. These aren't anonymous, or random. These are women who have chosen to share some amazingly intimate things about their lives. Work. Family. Friends. Love. Anger. Joy. Depression. Children - in all of their incarnations, babies to adults. Art and Beauty. And Humor.
I asked Sarah if I could be one of the women to join - and I am grateful that she allowed me to participate. I have submitted 157 pictures, to date, with two more to send in for yesterday and today. I carry my camera around with me at all times, and have gotten better at getting it out when I see something I want to document. At the end of the day, I look at the pictures I have taken and choose one that, for me, signals something significant about my day.
This is not a homogeneous group of women. We are at all stages and places in their lives. We come from all different religious and philosophical backgrounds. We may not have chosen to be friends based on a variety of factors - but we are now a cohesive group.
I shared this blog with a colleague of mine who specializes her research in the way people - particularly women- document their lives. While her research has focused on African women use photos to echo their life events, she was wildly fascinated by the Envisage project. "You have to write a paper!", she said to me this week, as I talked about the realization that regardless of who we were as individuals, our experiences as women - lovers, mothers, wives, friends, grandmothers - ties us in a way that is fundamentally relate able to one another. We echo common themes that circle back onto each others spheres of life. We are not different.
(Does this sound a little like any other blog you may know? TWC for example?)
Sarah is starting a sister blog to the envisage project, and is limiting this one to 25 participants. The start date is March 1st, 2009. If you might be interested then I encourage you to contact her and find out more about the project. If you aren't sure, then scroll through the Envisage archives to look at the type of work that has been done to date. I think you will be amazed.
Sarah can be contacted at: photostate2009@gmail.com
Last summer, I was contacted by Sarah - one of the TWC community - to ask if I would post her idea to start a blog made up of women from everywhere. Women who would take a picture everyday and send it to her. These aren't anonymous, or random. These are women who have chosen to share some amazingly intimate things about their lives. Work. Family. Friends. Love. Anger. Joy. Depression. Children - in all of their incarnations, babies to adults. Art and Beauty. And Humor.
I asked Sarah if I could be one of the women to join - and I am grateful that she allowed me to participate. I have submitted 157 pictures, to date, with two more to send in for yesterday and today. I carry my camera around with me at all times, and have gotten better at getting it out when I see something I want to document. At the end of the day, I look at the pictures I have taken and choose one that, for me, signals something significant about my day.
This is not a homogeneous group of women. We are at all stages and places in their lives. We come from all different religious and philosophical backgrounds. We may not have chosen to be friends based on a variety of factors - but we are now a cohesive group.
I shared this blog with a colleague of mine who specializes her research in the way people - particularly women- document their lives. While her research has focused on African women use photos to echo their life events, she was wildly fascinated by the Envisage project. "You have to write a paper!", she said to me this week, as I talked about the realization that regardless of who we were as individuals, our experiences as women - lovers, mothers, wives, friends, grandmothers - ties us in a way that is fundamentally relate able to one another. We echo common themes that circle back onto each others spheres of life. We are not different.
(Does this sound a little like any other blog you may know? TWC for example?)
Sarah is starting a sister blog to the envisage project, and is limiting this one to 25 participants. The start date is March 1st, 2009. If you might be interested then I encourage you to contact her and find out more about the project. If you aren't sure, then scroll through the Envisage archives to look at the type of work that has been done to date. I think you will be amazed.
Sarah can be contacted at: photostate2009@gmail.com
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
True Wife Confessions 281 Inorganic Chemistry
Confession #2801
When we watched "P.S. I Love You" and you cried along with me, I was unbelievably touched! I can't even imagine how I would cope with losing you, and to know that you feel the same about me is a wonderful, exhilarating feeling. I won't tell anyone that you cried (except maybe my mom, and it'll make her love you even more than she does already), but I'm so glad you did!
Confession #2802
So, probation is almost over and we still haven't talked about what happened to the extent it needs to be talked about. You're a nice guy who made a mistake and I am a nice girl who has decided to stay. A year later, what a long time that has gone by soooo fast. I started posting here to help me not say things to you that would be damaging to our marriage. I would feel emotions I didn't know I have, then went into therapy and realized I really could be pissed at you and decide to stay with you at the same time. Imagine, I had a choice. So now I choose to keep on going down the same path with you and if things don't go as planned or you should veer off the path with me, I can choose to leave. I can promise I will leave if there is a next time. the amount of time and money on this case is crazy. 12,000.00 dollars to keep you out of jail, now you may be layed off next week. We sure could have used the money now. I hope you really have learned your lesson. I come here to get these words out of my head before I say something that I really don't mean. I could hurt with my words, and that's not my style. Frankly I dont' want to be judged, I just want to vent without it coming back to me, but lately I feel I have to defend my thoughts here, too. With that said, STOP SNORING!!
Love Me
Confession #2803
I posted here last year. I said some terrible things in anger and despair. Now I want to rectify the situation.
Dear husband- I was wrong. So wrong. So dumb. I'm glad we fell in love again with fresh vigor and enthusiasm for one another. You're the best thing to ever happen to me. I adore you. I've been unfair and foolish in the past. Childlike in my frustrations and selfish. We got another start once we moved and I've never been happier. Thank you honey for putting up with my shit. Thank you for loving me because I'll love you until the day I die. I learned my lesson and with your patience and kindness, I've become a new woman! I love you baby and Happy Two Year Wedding Anniversary!-- Hope there are many more to come!
All my love- Your Devoted Wife
Confession #2804
Sometimes when we are caught up in the passion of our kissing and fucking, I look at you...and you look at me. And you start to cry a little. So I hold you and whisper how much I love you. I know how scary we can feel, this giant enormous passion between us. I love that you feel safe enough with me to let that out, and it makes me love you more.
Confession #2805
Whether or not you intended to hurt my feelings, you did. When I called you on it, rather than just a simple apology I got another 30 minute lecture about how I over-react, how I'm too sensitive, how I'm wrong. At that point I'll say anything, do anything, concede defeat just to get you to shut the fuck up. It doesn't mean you were right, it doesn't mean you "win". It means that I'm learning I can't discuss my feelings with you without being punished. So when the day comes that I'm completely fed up with you, my walking out will come as a complete surprise.
Confession #2806
I appreciate that you are trying to spice sex up after 20 years, but it freaks me the hell out when you zero in on my vagina after ignoring it for the past 20 years. No warning - no nothing - just on it. I finally faked an orgasm to get you up and out of there. Geesh. Give me a little warning, ask me what I like. Something.
Confession #2807
How can I LOVE someone so much but sometimes HATE them almost as much??
Maybe I don't love you anymore? I don't know. I know that I love the old you. The caring you. We had all these plans and dreams. You told me how everything would work out. Why did I believe you? Heck, I don't even care about that any more. I'd give anything for you just to TALK about our dreams with me. You don't even have to fulfill them. I think that some where deep inside you, you're still the same person. Why do you hide it away from me?
I was young and stupid and immature for listening to you and eloping. I wish I would have gone to school. But I thought that I had found my true love. If you were the same that you led me to believe you were, this all would have ended up fine. But you weren't the same person when I came up here to elope. You lied to me. I want to go back to how it was when we were dating. If I could go back I would. I don't know if we would still be together. That's one of the reasons that I came up here with you, I was scared to lose you. You made me feel like there was no other option. I didn't feel like there was any other option for us. I should have seen the way you started to treat me on the phone was only part of how you had changed.
I hate that you joined the army. You said it was your dream but sometimes you say that you did it because you had no other options. You had TWO good job offers without a college education. One of those would have paid for you to go to school for them. We could be making good money and still be back home. Our baby could have way better then we are giving him now. You are stationed in the middle of no where. The base is empty because everyone is deployed except you. I have no friends, I hate it here.
I hate that you got a hernia. I hate that they messed up the surgery. I hate that they messed up the surgery that was supposed to fix it. You haven't given me good sex since we got it. You got it a few months after we got married and we have been married for almost two years. No wonder I never want to do it with you. If you hadn't gotten the surgery you would be in Iraq right now. I NEVER want you to get hurt. The main reason that I don't want you to go is because I'm scared shitless that something would happen to you. I still love you that much. But if you were over there we would be getting a much needed break. We would be making decent money for once. I would be back home with people I love and with my friends.
I wish you would have gotten condoms when we first got married. I was young and naive and in love. You were my first I didn't know barely anything about sex. I trusted you when you said that you would pull & pray and that we wouldn't get pregnant. It might have worked IF YOU DID IT!! I didn't want to get pregnant right after turning 18!!! Don't take that the wrong way, I absolutely LOVE and ADORE my child. He is the BEST thing that ever happened to me. But I want better for him Which I could have given him if we had waited till we are better off. Now we go paycheck to paycheck with a little to spare. I also hate that you asked me to have sex just a few days before we got married. I wanted to be a virgin till we got married. You knew how important that was to me. No you didn't force me and yes I should have said no but I was emotionally unstable at the time. I just left home without telling anyone good bye and I just given up everything for you. I will regret that my whole life.
Thanks for getting me pregnant and then not helping me at all through it. Thanks for making ME go out and get what I craved for. Thanks for not going to the appointments with me. Thanks for making my big pregnant self go out all by myself when I needed out of the house. Thanks for making me force you to go grocery shopping the last few weeks of my pregnancy when my water could have broken at anytime. Thanks for telling me that you would do all that and then not doing it. That pisses me off the most, you saying one thing then not following through.
I hate you for looking at porn. Some people might be okay with it but I"M NOT!! You crushed me the first time I caught it. I just had a baby and felt like shit about myself and you go and do that. You looking at it takes the little self esteem that I have go away. Why was I not good enough for you? Was popping a baby out not good enough for you? I was in labor for over 24 hours, I pushed for over 4hours, and I had a 3rd degree tear. I was hurting pretty bad. You couldn't even wait a few weeks till I healed up. Use your damn hand, don't go look at naked girls that look way better than me. You promised never to do it again. The second time I found it I was PISSED. How could you break your promise?!? The third time just made me hate you a little more. I hate it. If you have to hide it from me it's cheating in my book. Don't even tell me that you were bored at work and that's why you did it. That is bull shit and you know it. If you were so bored you could have called me and talked to ME.
I absolutely DESPISE you for being so double sided. You tell me one thing that then you want another. You told me to stay on vacation for a couple more weeks and then you ruined it for calling me ALL the time and yelling at me. I didn't want to come home and the only reason I did was because of my mom. People threw a bridal shower for me so I got to pick out stuff for the house. I called and tried asking you what you would like, you tell me to pick whatever and you would like what I picked. Now every fricking time we have a fight you just have to bring up the fact that I picked out EVERYTHING in the house. Which is BS. The list of your double-sidedness just goes on and on.
Sometime when I look at you I just want to slap you so hard in your face. I think how much you have hurt me. I remember the names you called me, bitch, c***, whore, spoiled brat, dumbass, crazy and I'm sure there are more. I remember every time you have let me down. I think of all the promises you have broken. Thinking of all that makes me want to slap your face off. ..
You mess with my head. One minute you are fine and everything is great (those are the times that I am happy) the next you are yelling at me for everything. You tell me we can get out of the house but then you won't go out with me. We live in the middle of nowhere. All my friends have left. I have no one to talk to except you and my mom. Then you have the balls to yell at me for talking to my mom all the time. We talk once a day, leave it alone. Talk to me more and maybe I wouldn't. Yes, I think that I might be starting to get depressed, but not because I'm missing my family and friends back home, because of how you treat me. I feel like shit whenever you are around.I don't want to be your princess again. I just want some respect from you. That's all I ask. I'm lonely that is why I get on the internet. It started when I was pregnant and I was on it all the time, I had nothing better to do. I don't get on it that much anymore, a few times a day. I can't quit cold turkey, it's my only link to the outside world.
I wish you would get this through your head: I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER!!!! I had no plans to leave you. I am not the bitch that she is. If you don't agree with me about something I will not rip your balls off. I do not want a guy that gives me everything that I want because he is scared of me. I tell you what I think about something and that is called an opinion. I will straight out tell you if I don't want you to do this or that. Stop being a dick to me because you are scared of our relationship being how your mom and step-dad are. You are more like her than me. You are the moodiest guy I have ever met.
Oh by the way, your proposal was not a surprise. I went along with it to make you happy. I knew all along. Stop telling everyone that it was a surprise, you sound dumb.
What made me write all this is because we are fighting. You told me while fighting that if I was sexy then you would put effort into our sex life. You accused me of cheating. You dumb fuck, who the hell would I cheat with?? There is NO ONE up here. You have to go and question my sanity. I might be slightly depressed but I am NOT crazy. You not only question my sanity but you have the nerve to say you don't trust me with my own child. You say 'I'm worried you are either going to hurt him physically, or neglect him and hurt him emotionally'. Want to know what I have to say to that....Go FUCK yourself. That child is the only reason I live. He is the main reason I am still with you. I would never hurt him. How could you say something like that when I cry over how big he has gotten, I worry when he falls and want to take him to the E.R..I'm the one that has taken him to the E.R. everytime he has been sick. I am the one that gets up to take care of him in the middle of the night. I'm the one that clothes him and bathes him. That isn't you. You have yet to do any of that. You got up with him ONE time but it was at 8 a.m. on a Saturday so I could sleep a little more. I couldn't even sleep though because he was crying so much from you not doing anything with him. Right now I am frustrated because of his sleeping schedule. He doesn't sleep like he used to and wasn't going to bed till 1-2-3 a.m. I was trying to fix it but it just made him a big crab. I wasn't getting mad at him at all just the problem we were having with sleeping. That is a big difference. I was getting barely any sleep b/c I tried to stay awake to talk to you and be with you, on the weekends, while you were on nights. Yes, I was sleeping during the day WITH J. I was getting maybe 6 hours in a 24hour period. Don't critize me when you aren't doing anything to do with it. It's not as easy as you think, staying home all day with him.
I want to show you all this. But I know that you'll just twist it all around and I'll be the bad guy. I want everything to be back to normal like before. I hope you realize that if you don't start to change soon, I'm out. I will not put up with this crap much longer. I hate who I am becoming. I don't want J to think that it's okay to treat women like you treat me. Don't worry I'll stay long enough for me to get at least a start on my college at your expense. Long enough for me to save up enough money to make it for a few months.
I don't want to. Really I don't but I can't live off of broken promises. I want to go to counseling and get help. I'm telling you this when you get home from work. You need to make an effort though, a big effort. Dumb old me will forgive you and listen to your promises and love you like you deserve it. I really do love you, after reading all that I typed I still love you. You better straighten up before I wisen up.
Love,
your push-over wife
Confession #2808
My husband doesn’t get why I don’t want my sil to watch my daughter, EVER. It’s because she drinks to oblivion, all the time, and watches waaaay inappropriate movies, with LOTS of nudity, sex and language. My sil and mil watch stuff in the living room in front of whoever is there that I would consider borderline porn. IN PLAIN VIEW OF EVERYONE. It’s embarrassing. If we are all over at my mil or sil’s house, they will be watching an embarrassing movie, I make sure me and my daughter are NOT in the same room with them. My husband doesn’t really notice, he thinks they are in the other room watching a romcom and that he would rather stay in the main living room watching sports with his dad. It’s gotten to the point where they will give me a heads up that they are watching a movie and tell me the name, just so I can make myself scarce if need be, I have to give them credit for that. What’s wrong with watching more wholesome family fare when say…WHEN KIDS ARE AROUND? And saving the more adult stuff for your bedroom, with the door locked!
My sil watches the most vile movies, with lots of nudity, sex and language, stuff that I find embarrassing. She could easily watch a movie that had female nudity ALL during it and not even give it a second thought. She hasn’t figured out yet that WOMEN AREN’T OBJECTS.
I’m not judging anyone else that likes this, fine, live anyway you want, but I don’t want my daughter around people that don’t share my core belief that children shouldn’t be exposed to strong sexual content.
My husband/her brother, just thinks that she is “stupid”, and he says just ignore her, and that he is just used to her antics that it rolls off his back. He doesn’t think she is as bad as I do because he is more used to her.
Btw, she doesn’t have kids cause she isnt able to and doesn’t want to adopt.
And she doesn’t have the common sense of a fruit fly, and refuses to clean up her language in front of my daughter. My husband doesn’t really want to spend time with her either, he doesn’t really want to talk about it cause she’s family and he believes in family loyalty. But she lives 20 min from us and we hardly ever see her, only family get togethers, we don’t hang out with her. Every once in a while she will mention that she would love to see my daughter and babysit. He feels as if he should throw her a bone and let her babysit. I have given in 2 times, and she came to our house so I knew that I would have some control over the environment.
I really avoid her as much as possible, she is soo phony, I tried to be her friend at first, but once I saw how she was, I don’t want anything to do with her. She pretends to be friends with people, and then behind their backs she talks trash about them. She does this with several family members, and they have no idea how much she says she “hates” them when they aren’t around. Her family ignores this about her.
Confession #2809
I pray every day that I will wake up and this will all be a dream and I will be in the year 2004 again, before I met you, so that I might miraculously make a different decision. But time never rewinds for me, my life doesn’t change. If it were not for our daughter, I would have ended it by now. Not just our relationship and a lot of other things, but my life. I’ve thought about it often, many times, once with the gun in my hand, but each time I think about her – how she needs me and what it would do to her if I was suddenly gone. I’ve always known that I would do anything for her, and I guess that includes living when I would rather just end it all. You are all the family that she and I have, and she adores you like no one else. But she sees things from a child’s perspective, and she doesn’t know the man that I have to live with. It’s not simply your drinking problem and the fact that you spend hundreds of dollars a month on alcohol. It’s also the fact that when you are drunk you treat me like shit. I’m glad that you stay outside to drink, and that she doesn’t have to see you drunk, because you are pathetic and disgusting when you are trashed. Seeing you like that makes me want to cry for you and to beat the shit out of you all at the same time.
When we first married, you were so hard-working, constantly fixing things around the house and taking care of the yard. Now the yard looks like shit and the house is about to fall in. Our room has had a hole in the ceiling for three years, the power in one bedroom has been out for two weeks (it’s a miracle the house hasn’t burnt down yet), the kitchen sink has been leaking for months, the bathtub faucet is leaking and rotting out the sheetrock around it, and much more. I don’t know how to fix these things myself, and you won’t let me hire someone else to take care of them.
Then there is our sex life – or lack of. When you’re drinking you can’t do anything, even though that is the only time you halfway try. When you’re sober, you are disinterested or too tired or whatever the hell your problem is. The little blue pills made you feel bad – boo fucking hoo. Last night when you were drunk and I was “taking care” of you, you suddenly sat up and starting choking me. It was easy to free myself, because you are weak as shit when you are drunk, but it scared me and pissed me off at the same time. That’s only the second time that you’ve ever gotten physical with me, the first being the time I tried to keep you from driving drunk and you punched me in the jaw. It’s true how they show cartoon characters seeing stars when they get whacked in the head. I saw stars and couldn’t move my jaw without pain for a week.
When you are sober, you claim to not remember any of the terrible things you did or said while drunk. But the funny thing is that no matter how wasted you were, you can always remember everything I did or said. So basically you are lying. You are fully aware of all of the times you told me you didn’t love me or that I was a stupid bitch.
You spend all of your time at work, getting drunk in the backyard, trying to sober up, sleeping entire weekends away, and watching TV. We never do anything together as a family anymore. I don’t understand it. You have a young wife who treats you like a king, a beautiful daughter who worships you, a good job, friends, and a decent home. Why are you trying to throw it all away? I know you have hurts and old wounds, but who doesn’t? Snap the fuck out of it!
I’m sick of living this way. I know people would say that it is my fault for staying, that I could take our daughter and leave if things are so bad, but I have to have a place to take her, a way to make things not so difficult for her. So as soon as I get up enough money, which won’t be much longer, I am going to leave you to wallow in your misery. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with a man with split personalities, who could be a bad influence on our daughter, who says he loves me but doesn’t act like he does. I’m 28 years old – I need stability, a strong shoulder to lean on, affection, and at least some occasional sex. Even though I have no other family and I know my life will be lonely and hard without you, I also know it will be so much easier emotionally and physically. You take so much out of me. My stomach is in knots just thinking about how our baby will react to being away from you, and how I will feel walking out that door, and how I will constantly worry about you, knowing that you really need me. But I have to do it. For me and mostly for her. I don’t want to be this person anymore, in this life.
Confession #2810
To my Future Hubby:
Whenever we argue, you always say that I don't trust you, which isn't entirely true. I do trust YOU, the essence of your being, the good man you are. I trust that you will stand by my side and be there when it counts. I trust that you will never stray, and that you always have our best interests at heart. I trust that you love me, that you are my best friend, and that we can solve any problem together. I love you (more importantly, I like you!) and I'm ecstatic at the thought of being your wife.
But...
I DON'T trust your ADD. Your memory is horrible, and it is sooo frustrating! It doesn't seem to matter what you have to remember- as soon as it enters your pretty little head, it's gone. (For instance, I'll send you to the store with a grocery list, and you'll forget to read it. You'll miss half the items, and then it's another trip. How hard is it to read a piece of paper?!? Maybe I should start pinning lists to your shirt...) I'm responsible for keeping track of EVERYTHING- birthdays, bills, chores, appointments, groceries, planning for the wedding- and I'm sick of doing it! I know you've been struggling with ADD for years, and you say you've tried every trick in the book to improve things; apparently none of them worked. I don't think you tried very hard, though. I have a bad memory myself (thanks to genetics and a few klutzy concussions when I was a kid), but compared to you, I am the Memory Queen! I write things down, and I form habits and routines to help me remember. You're cooperating with my "box" idea for your keys and things, but otherwise you've given up trying and have handed me all the responsibility. Which is very unfair to me! I am not your babysitter, I am not your mom, and I am not your secretary. I don't care how you do it, but do what grown-ups do and keep track of your own shit!
I DON'T trust you to recognize what needs to be done around the house, and do it. Maybe it's the ADD again, or maybe it's because your parents didn't make you do chores when you were young. (Which they should be slapped for! It's the job of parents to make sure that their children are prepared for adulthood. They didn't do you- or me- any favours by cleaning up after you all the time.) I need you to be a big boy, notice what needs to be done WITHOUT ME TELLING YOU, and do it. It's bad enough that I have to remind our roommate just to clean up after himself (and by the way, the second we can move out and leave him and his disgusting habits behind, we're gone- we'll give him notice, but then it's 'So long, Gollum'.), I don't need the added stress of babysitting you too. (FYI, I'm not best pleased about having to babysit him in the first place. You have NO idea.) Grow up and clean up after yourself. And then do some extra chores- you owe me.
I DON'T trust you to save money. I'm a saver, and you're a spender. I know you've really been trying to save, especially with the wedding coming up soon, but you forget how expensive things are and how often you really do splurge. That's why I've started writing everything down, so I can show you where the money is going. Don't fight me on it, and don't make me feel bad when I have to say "I'm sorry honey, but you can't have that right now". Weddings are expensive (even though we're doing our best to cut costs. Sorry, I'M doing my best. You're not really involved with the details, are you?), and I don't want my family to have to help us out more than necessary. Of course, if YOUR family was interested in helping, maybe we could ease up on the money restrictions. Which brings me to another point...
I DON'T trust you to stand up for yourself (or me) with your parents. We've been together for 2 and a half years, and your dad has yet to wish me a Happy Birthday. Does he think I don't have one? And your mom forgot my birthday last year. I'm sorry that this bothers me, but it does. Holidays are VERY important in my family, and I believe that if someone is important to you, you remember the days that are important to them. Period. Your dad didn't even get us a present this past Christmas. I don't mind as much about myself, but you're his only child! He can lend money ($4K!) to a woman he barely knows, but he can't get you a damn Christmas present?!? I know that hurt you, and I can't forgive him for that. I will play nice, just as I always have, but I will never forgive either of your parents for hurting you so many, many times. The irony is that your parents live so close, while mine (wonderful people, especially my mom) live in another province. I would gladly move to be closer to them and further away from yours... (And we will, eventually, if I have anything to say about it!) Your parents aren't even showing interest in our wedding! If you would only talk to them and tell them that their actions are hurting you/us, maybe things would improve. But although you can stand up for yourself in basically any other situation, you're incapable of standing up to (or even disagreeing with!) your parents. And I can't understand why.
I love you so much, honey-bunny. Don't ever doubt that! But sometimes I wish I was marrying a responsible adult, instead of an irresponsible man-child. I don't expect you to be perfect (I know I'm certainly not!), but I do expect you to try. Please keep trying. And up the effort!
Your Loving Future Wife
When we watched "P.S. I Love You" and you cried along with me, I was unbelievably touched! I can't even imagine how I would cope with losing you, and to know that you feel the same about me is a wonderful, exhilarating feeling. I won't tell anyone that you cried (except maybe my mom, and it'll make her love you even more than she does already), but I'm so glad you did!
Confession #2802
So, probation is almost over and we still haven't talked about what happened to the extent it needs to be talked about. You're a nice guy who made a mistake and I am a nice girl who has decided to stay. A year later, what a long time that has gone by soooo fast. I started posting here to help me not say things to you that would be damaging to our marriage. I would feel emotions I didn't know I have, then went into therapy and realized I really could be pissed at you and decide to stay with you at the same time. Imagine, I had a choice. So now I choose to keep on going down the same path with you and if things don't go as planned or you should veer off the path with me, I can choose to leave. I can promise I will leave if there is a next time. the amount of time and money on this case is crazy. 12,000.00 dollars to keep you out of jail, now you may be layed off next week. We sure could have used the money now. I hope you really have learned your lesson. I come here to get these words out of my head before I say something that I really don't mean. I could hurt with my words, and that's not my style. Frankly I dont' want to be judged, I just want to vent without it coming back to me, but lately I feel I have to defend my thoughts here, too. With that said, STOP SNORING!!
Love Me
Confession #2803
I posted here last year. I said some terrible things in anger and despair. Now I want to rectify the situation.
Dear husband- I was wrong. So wrong. So dumb. I'm glad we fell in love again with fresh vigor and enthusiasm for one another. You're the best thing to ever happen to me. I adore you. I've been unfair and foolish in the past. Childlike in my frustrations and selfish. We got another start once we moved and I've never been happier. Thank you honey for putting up with my shit. Thank you for loving me because I'll love you until the day I die. I learned my lesson and with your patience and kindness, I've become a new woman! I love you baby and Happy Two Year Wedding Anniversary!-- Hope there are many more to come!
All my love- Your Devoted Wife
Confession #2804
Sometimes when we are caught up in the passion of our kissing and fucking, I look at you...and you look at me. And you start to cry a little. So I hold you and whisper how much I love you. I know how scary we can feel, this giant enormous passion between us. I love that you feel safe enough with me to let that out, and it makes me love you more.
Confession #2805
Whether or not you intended to hurt my feelings, you did. When I called you on it, rather than just a simple apology I got another 30 minute lecture about how I over-react, how I'm too sensitive, how I'm wrong. At that point I'll say anything, do anything, concede defeat just to get you to shut the fuck up. It doesn't mean you were right, it doesn't mean you "win". It means that I'm learning I can't discuss my feelings with you without being punished. So when the day comes that I'm completely fed up with you, my walking out will come as a complete surprise.
Confession #2806
I appreciate that you are trying to spice sex up after 20 years, but it freaks me the hell out when you zero in on my vagina after ignoring it for the past 20 years. No warning - no nothing - just on it. I finally faked an orgasm to get you up and out of there. Geesh. Give me a little warning, ask me what I like. Something.
Confession #2807
How can I LOVE someone so much but sometimes HATE them almost as much??
Maybe I don't love you anymore? I don't know. I know that I love the old you. The caring you. We had all these plans and dreams. You told me how everything would work out. Why did I believe you? Heck, I don't even care about that any more. I'd give anything for you just to TALK about our dreams with me. You don't even have to fulfill them. I think that some where deep inside you, you're still the same person. Why do you hide it away from me?
I was young and stupid and immature for listening to you and eloping. I wish I would have gone to school. But I thought that I had found my true love. If you were the same that you led me to believe you were, this all would have ended up fine. But you weren't the same person when I came up here to elope. You lied to me. I want to go back to how it was when we were dating. If I could go back I would. I don't know if we would still be together. That's one of the reasons that I came up here with you, I was scared to lose you. You made me feel like there was no other option. I didn't feel like there was any other option for us. I should have seen the way you started to treat me on the phone was only part of how you had changed.
I hate that you joined the army. You said it was your dream but sometimes you say that you did it because you had no other options. You had TWO good job offers without a college education. One of those would have paid for you to go to school for them. We could be making good money and still be back home. Our baby could have way better then we are giving him now. You are stationed in the middle of no where. The base is empty because everyone is deployed except you. I have no friends, I hate it here.
I hate that you got a hernia. I hate that they messed up the surgery. I hate that they messed up the surgery that was supposed to fix it. You haven't given me good sex since we got it. You got it a few months after we got married and we have been married for almost two years. No wonder I never want to do it with you. If you hadn't gotten the surgery you would be in Iraq right now. I NEVER want you to get hurt. The main reason that I don't want you to go is because I'm scared shitless that something would happen to you. I still love you that much. But if you were over there we would be getting a much needed break. We would be making decent money for once. I would be back home with people I love and with my friends.
I wish you would have gotten condoms when we first got married. I was young and naive and in love. You were my first I didn't know barely anything about sex. I trusted you when you said that you would pull & pray and that we wouldn't get pregnant. It might have worked IF YOU DID IT!! I didn't want to get pregnant right after turning 18!!! Don't take that the wrong way, I absolutely LOVE and ADORE my child. He is the BEST thing that ever happened to me. But I want better for him Which I could have given him if we had waited till we are better off. Now we go paycheck to paycheck with a little to spare. I also hate that you asked me to have sex just a few days before we got married. I wanted to be a virgin till we got married. You knew how important that was to me. No you didn't force me and yes I should have said no but I was emotionally unstable at the time. I just left home without telling anyone good bye and I just given up everything for you. I will regret that my whole life.
Thanks for getting me pregnant and then not helping me at all through it. Thanks for making ME go out and get what I craved for. Thanks for not going to the appointments with me. Thanks for making my big pregnant self go out all by myself when I needed out of the house. Thanks for making me force you to go grocery shopping the last few weeks of my pregnancy when my water could have broken at anytime. Thanks for telling me that you would do all that and then not doing it. That pisses me off the most, you saying one thing then not following through.
I hate you for looking at porn. Some people might be okay with it but I"M NOT!! You crushed me the first time I caught it. I just had a baby and felt like shit about myself and you go and do that. You looking at it takes the little self esteem that I have go away. Why was I not good enough for you? Was popping a baby out not good enough for you? I was in labor for over 24 hours, I pushed for over 4hours, and I had a 3rd degree tear. I was hurting pretty bad. You couldn't even wait a few weeks till I healed up. Use your damn hand, don't go look at naked girls that look way better than me. You promised never to do it again. The second time I found it I was PISSED. How could you break your promise?!? The third time just made me hate you a little more. I hate it. If you have to hide it from me it's cheating in my book. Don't even tell me that you were bored at work and that's why you did it. That is bull shit and you know it. If you were so bored you could have called me and talked to ME.
I absolutely DESPISE you for being so double sided. You tell me one thing that then you want another. You told me to stay on vacation for a couple more weeks and then you ruined it for calling me ALL the time and yelling at me. I didn't want to come home and the only reason I did was because of my mom. People threw a bridal shower for me so I got to pick out stuff for the house. I called and tried asking you what you would like, you tell me to pick whatever and you would like what I picked. Now every fricking time we have a fight you just have to bring up the fact that I picked out EVERYTHING in the house. Which is BS. The list of your double-sidedness just goes on and on.
Sometime when I look at you I just want to slap you so hard in your face. I think how much you have hurt me. I remember the names you called me, bitch, c***, whore, spoiled brat, dumbass, crazy and I'm sure there are more. I remember every time you have let me down. I think of all the promises you have broken. Thinking of all that makes me want to slap your face off. ..
You mess with my head. One minute you are fine and everything is great (those are the times that I am happy) the next you are yelling at me for everything. You tell me we can get out of the house but then you won't go out with me. We live in the middle of nowhere. All my friends have left. I have no one to talk to except you and my mom. Then you have the balls to yell at me for talking to my mom all the time. We talk once a day, leave it alone. Talk to me more and maybe I wouldn't. Yes, I think that I might be starting to get depressed, but not because I'm missing my family and friends back home, because of how you treat me. I feel like shit whenever you are around.I don't want to be your princess again. I just want some respect from you. That's all I ask. I'm lonely that is why I get on the internet. It started when I was pregnant and I was on it all the time, I had nothing better to do. I don't get on it that much anymore, a few times a day. I can't quit cold turkey, it's my only link to the outside world.
I wish you would get this through your head: I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER!!!! I had no plans to leave you. I am not the bitch that she is. If you don't agree with me about something I will not rip your balls off. I do not want a guy that gives me everything that I want because he is scared of me. I tell you what I think about something and that is called an opinion. I will straight out tell you if I don't want you to do this or that. Stop being a dick to me because you are scared of our relationship being how your mom and step-dad are. You are more like her than me. You are the moodiest guy I have ever met.
Oh by the way, your proposal was not a surprise. I went along with it to make you happy. I knew all along. Stop telling everyone that it was a surprise, you sound dumb.
What made me write all this is because we are fighting. You told me while fighting that if I was sexy then you would put effort into our sex life. You accused me of cheating. You dumb fuck, who the hell would I cheat with?? There is NO ONE up here. You have to go and question my sanity. I might be slightly depressed but I am NOT crazy. You not only question my sanity but you have the nerve to say you don't trust me with my own child. You say 'I'm worried you are either going to hurt him physically, or neglect him and hurt him emotionally'. Want to know what I have to say to that....Go FUCK yourself. That child is the only reason I live. He is the main reason I am still with you. I would never hurt him. How could you say something like that when I cry over how big he has gotten, I worry when he falls and want to take him to the E.R..I'm the one that has taken him to the E.R. everytime he has been sick. I am the one that gets up to take care of him in the middle of the night. I'm the one that clothes him and bathes him. That isn't you. You have yet to do any of that. You got up with him ONE time but it was at 8 a.m. on a Saturday so I could sleep a little more. I couldn't even sleep though because he was crying so much from you not doing anything with him. Right now I am frustrated because of his sleeping schedule. He doesn't sleep like he used to and wasn't going to bed till 1-2-3 a.m. I was trying to fix it but it just made him a big crab. I wasn't getting mad at him at all just the problem we were having with sleeping. That is a big difference. I was getting barely any sleep b/c I tried to stay awake to talk to you and be with you, on the weekends, while you were on nights. Yes, I was sleeping during the day WITH J. I was getting maybe 6 hours in a 24hour period. Don't critize me when you aren't doing anything to do with it. It's not as easy as you think, staying home all day with him.
I want to show you all this. But I know that you'll just twist it all around and I'll be the bad guy. I want everything to be back to normal like before. I hope you realize that if you don't start to change soon, I'm out. I will not put up with this crap much longer. I hate who I am becoming. I don't want J to think that it's okay to treat women like you treat me. Don't worry I'll stay long enough for me to get at least a start on my college at your expense. Long enough for me to save up enough money to make it for a few months.
I don't want to. Really I don't but I can't live off of broken promises. I want to go to counseling and get help. I'm telling you this when you get home from work. You need to make an effort though, a big effort. Dumb old me will forgive you and listen to your promises and love you like you deserve it. I really do love you, after reading all that I typed I still love you. You better straighten up before I wisen up.
Love,
your push-over wife
Confession #2808
My husband doesn’t get why I don’t want my sil to watch my daughter, EVER. It’s because she drinks to oblivion, all the time, and watches waaaay inappropriate movies, with LOTS of nudity, sex and language. My sil and mil watch stuff in the living room in front of whoever is there that I would consider borderline porn. IN PLAIN VIEW OF EVERYONE. It’s embarrassing. If we are all over at my mil or sil’s house, they will be watching an embarrassing movie, I make sure me and my daughter are NOT in the same room with them. My husband doesn’t really notice, he thinks they are in the other room watching a romcom and that he would rather stay in the main living room watching sports with his dad. It’s gotten to the point where they will give me a heads up that they are watching a movie and tell me the name, just so I can make myself scarce if need be, I have to give them credit for that. What’s wrong with watching more wholesome family fare when say…WHEN KIDS ARE AROUND? And saving the more adult stuff for your bedroom, with the door locked!
My sil watches the most vile movies, with lots of nudity, sex and language, stuff that I find embarrassing. She could easily watch a movie that had female nudity ALL during it and not even give it a second thought. She hasn’t figured out yet that WOMEN AREN’T OBJECTS.
I’m not judging anyone else that likes this, fine, live anyway you want, but I don’t want my daughter around people that don’t share my core belief that children shouldn’t be exposed to strong sexual content.
My husband/her brother, just thinks that she is “stupid”, and he says just ignore her, and that he is just used to her antics that it rolls off his back. He doesn’t think she is as bad as I do because he is more used to her.
Btw, she doesn’t have kids cause she isnt able to and doesn’t want to adopt.
And she doesn’t have the common sense of a fruit fly, and refuses to clean up her language in front of my daughter. My husband doesn’t really want to spend time with her either, he doesn’t really want to talk about it cause she’s family and he believes in family loyalty. But she lives 20 min from us and we hardly ever see her, only family get togethers, we don’t hang out with her. Every once in a while she will mention that she would love to see my daughter and babysit. He feels as if he should throw her a bone and let her babysit. I have given in 2 times, and she came to our house so I knew that I would have some control over the environment.
I really avoid her as much as possible, she is soo phony, I tried to be her friend at first, but once I saw how she was, I don’t want anything to do with her. She pretends to be friends with people, and then behind their backs she talks trash about them. She does this with several family members, and they have no idea how much she says she “hates” them when they aren’t around. Her family ignores this about her.
Confession #2809
I pray every day that I will wake up and this will all be a dream and I will be in the year 2004 again, before I met you, so that I might miraculously make a different decision. But time never rewinds for me, my life doesn’t change. If it were not for our daughter, I would have ended it by now. Not just our relationship and a lot of other things, but my life. I’ve thought about it often, many times, once with the gun in my hand, but each time I think about her – how she needs me and what it would do to her if I was suddenly gone. I’ve always known that I would do anything for her, and I guess that includes living when I would rather just end it all. You are all the family that she and I have, and she adores you like no one else. But she sees things from a child’s perspective, and she doesn’t know the man that I have to live with. It’s not simply your drinking problem and the fact that you spend hundreds of dollars a month on alcohol. It’s also the fact that when you are drunk you treat me like shit. I’m glad that you stay outside to drink, and that she doesn’t have to see you drunk, because you are pathetic and disgusting when you are trashed. Seeing you like that makes me want to cry for you and to beat the shit out of you all at the same time.
When we first married, you were so hard-working, constantly fixing things around the house and taking care of the yard. Now the yard looks like shit and the house is about to fall in. Our room has had a hole in the ceiling for three years, the power in one bedroom has been out for two weeks (it’s a miracle the house hasn’t burnt down yet), the kitchen sink has been leaking for months, the bathtub faucet is leaking and rotting out the sheetrock around it, and much more. I don’t know how to fix these things myself, and you won’t let me hire someone else to take care of them.
Then there is our sex life – or lack of. When you’re drinking you can’t do anything, even though that is the only time you halfway try. When you’re sober, you are disinterested or too tired or whatever the hell your problem is. The little blue pills made you feel bad – boo fucking hoo. Last night when you were drunk and I was “taking care” of you, you suddenly sat up and starting choking me. It was easy to free myself, because you are weak as shit when you are drunk, but it scared me and pissed me off at the same time. That’s only the second time that you’ve ever gotten physical with me, the first being the time I tried to keep you from driving drunk and you punched me in the jaw. It’s true how they show cartoon characters seeing stars when they get whacked in the head. I saw stars and couldn’t move my jaw without pain for a week.
When you are sober, you claim to not remember any of the terrible things you did or said while drunk. But the funny thing is that no matter how wasted you were, you can always remember everything I did or said. So basically you are lying. You are fully aware of all of the times you told me you didn’t love me or that I was a stupid bitch.
You spend all of your time at work, getting drunk in the backyard, trying to sober up, sleeping entire weekends away, and watching TV. We never do anything together as a family anymore. I don’t understand it. You have a young wife who treats you like a king, a beautiful daughter who worships you, a good job, friends, and a decent home. Why are you trying to throw it all away? I know you have hurts and old wounds, but who doesn’t? Snap the fuck out of it!
I’m sick of living this way. I know people would say that it is my fault for staying, that I could take our daughter and leave if things are so bad, but I have to have a place to take her, a way to make things not so difficult for her. So as soon as I get up enough money, which won’t be much longer, I am going to leave you to wallow in your misery. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with a man with split personalities, who could be a bad influence on our daughter, who says he loves me but doesn’t act like he does. I’m 28 years old – I need stability, a strong shoulder to lean on, affection, and at least some occasional sex. Even though I have no other family and I know my life will be lonely and hard without you, I also know it will be so much easier emotionally and physically. You take so much out of me. My stomach is in knots just thinking about how our baby will react to being away from you, and how I will feel walking out that door, and how I will constantly worry about you, knowing that you really need me. But I have to do it. For me and mostly for her. I don’t want to be this person anymore, in this life.
Confession #2810
To my Future Hubby:
Whenever we argue, you always say that I don't trust you, which isn't entirely true. I do trust YOU, the essence of your being, the good man you are. I trust that you will stand by my side and be there when it counts. I trust that you will never stray, and that you always have our best interests at heart. I trust that you love me, that you are my best friend, and that we can solve any problem together. I love you (more importantly, I like you!) and I'm ecstatic at the thought of being your wife.
But...
I DON'T trust your ADD. Your memory is horrible, and it is sooo frustrating! It doesn't seem to matter what you have to remember- as soon as it enters your pretty little head, it's gone. (For instance, I'll send you to the store with a grocery list, and you'll forget to read it. You'll miss half the items, and then it's another trip. How hard is it to read a piece of paper?!? Maybe I should start pinning lists to your shirt...) I'm responsible for keeping track of EVERYTHING- birthdays, bills, chores, appointments, groceries, planning for the wedding- and I'm sick of doing it! I know you've been struggling with ADD for years, and you say you've tried every trick in the book to improve things; apparently none of them worked. I don't think you tried very hard, though. I have a bad memory myself (thanks to genetics and a few klutzy concussions when I was a kid), but compared to you, I am the Memory Queen! I write things down, and I form habits and routines to help me remember. You're cooperating with my "box" idea for your keys and things, but otherwise you've given up trying and have handed me all the responsibility. Which is very unfair to me! I am not your babysitter, I am not your mom, and I am not your secretary. I don't care how you do it, but do what grown-ups do and keep track of your own shit!
I DON'T trust you to recognize what needs to be done around the house, and do it. Maybe it's the ADD again, or maybe it's because your parents didn't make you do chores when you were young. (Which they should be slapped for! It's the job of parents to make sure that their children are prepared for adulthood. They didn't do you- or me- any favours by cleaning up after you all the time.) I need you to be a big boy, notice what needs to be done WITHOUT ME TELLING YOU, and do it. It's bad enough that I have to remind our roommate just to clean up after himself (and by the way, the second we can move out and leave him and his disgusting habits behind, we're gone- we'll give him notice, but then it's 'So long, Gollum'.), I don't need the added stress of babysitting you too. (FYI, I'm not best pleased about having to babysit him in the first place. You have NO idea.) Grow up and clean up after yourself. And then do some extra chores- you owe me.
I DON'T trust you to save money. I'm a saver, and you're a spender. I know you've really been trying to save, especially with the wedding coming up soon, but you forget how expensive things are and how often you really do splurge. That's why I've started writing everything down, so I can show you where the money is going. Don't fight me on it, and don't make me feel bad when I have to say "I'm sorry honey, but you can't have that right now". Weddings are expensive (even though we're doing our best to cut costs. Sorry, I'M doing my best. You're not really involved with the details, are you?), and I don't want my family to have to help us out more than necessary. Of course, if YOUR family was interested in helping, maybe we could ease up on the money restrictions. Which brings me to another point...
I DON'T trust you to stand up for yourself (or me) with your parents. We've been together for 2 and a half years, and your dad has yet to wish me a Happy Birthday. Does he think I don't have one? And your mom forgot my birthday last year. I'm sorry that this bothers me, but it does. Holidays are VERY important in my family, and I believe that if someone is important to you, you remember the days that are important to them. Period. Your dad didn't even get us a present this past Christmas. I don't mind as much about myself, but you're his only child! He can lend money ($4K!) to a woman he barely knows, but he can't get you a damn Christmas present?!? I know that hurt you, and I can't forgive him for that. I will play nice, just as I always have, but I will never forgive either of your parents for hurting you so many, many times. The irony is that your parents live so close, while mine (wonderful people, especially my mom) live in another province. I would gladly move to be closer to them and further away from yours... (And we will, eventually, if I have anything to say about it!) Your parents aren't even showing interest in our wedding! If you would only talk to them and tell them that their actions are hurting you/us, maybe things would improve. But although you can stand up for yourself in basically any other situation, you're incapable of standing up to (or even disagreeing with!) your parents. And I can't understand why.
I love you so much, honey-bunny. Don't ever doubt that! But sometimes I wish I was marrying a responsible adult, instead of an irresponsible man-child. I don't expect you to be perfect (I know I'm certainly not!), but I do expect you to try. Please keep trying. And up the effort!
Your Loving Future Wife
Monday, January 26, 2009
True Wife Confessions 280 Traffic Cameras
Confession #2791
I was confession 1880; we conceived our son at a foreign clinic, through a double gamete donation -- our eggs & sperm were both too compromised to work. We are totally besotted with our son, and the only stress is hiding this HUGE secret from the small-minded small towners we live among.
I was so thrilled at the universally positive tone of the comments, that I decided maybe it wasn't crazy after all to go back and try again, even though I am four years older and the "miracle" story would look a little thin. So I took the trip end of March -- April 1, to be exact, was the transfer date. All went well and I saw two pink lines again, soon after: hurray! Except now the worries began: what if it was twins? What if I got pre-eclampsia again, instead of nosing around the edges of it as I had done the first time? What if the birth was premature and I now had a crippled baby along with an active toddler? No spare money, little spare time... how would we cope? I sat there in the dark, rocking my son, and worried. My husband and I fought bitterly over care of the toddler -- I thought he was too lenient, he thought I was too strict. When a three year old hits you you imagine him hitting the baby, and you want your man to step in rather than watch his pregnant wife get whacked! I kept wondering, should I not have gone at all....just left them in the freezer forever. At least this way there was a CHANCE things would go well, right?
Well, they did until they didn't. At my 12 week scan they told me growth had stopped at 9.5 weeks. No heartbeat. I was crushed.... and in a tiny dark place, relieved. No bedrest, no preeclampsia, no fear of dying for me. But the loss, the loss is grieved every day now. I wanted my son to have a sibling! Every problem that came up I had a plan for, and now all those plans are for nothing. I am so unbelievably bitter that we were allowed to rejoice at all, then have it snatched away for no known reason. Because they did the genetic testing, and the baby was fine....it's me that caused the problem, somehow. And this is what keeps me up at night. Every time I raised my voice and blood pressure, every time I lifted my son a little roughly, every time I strained on the toilet..... I thought, hell, the last one stuck, this one is going to have to deal. So careless. I feel like through my worry and ambivalence, I killed her.
Confession #2792
My mil is driving me nuts. She honestly doesn’t see anything wrong with trying to wedge herself inbetween me and my daughters relationship. She went behind my back and came up with a game plan about wanting to take my daughter to get her hair cut, but then didn’t have the backbone to tell me about it. She had another family member tell me that she was going to take her to a salon and cut her hair, and the appointment is next week. HELLO, no f’ing way are you doing this. When I put my foot down and said no, she made it seem like I was the bad guy. My daughter is not getting her hair cut right now and when she does I will arrange it, not you. This is my daughter, I am her gate keeper, YOU ASK ME IF YOU WANT TO DO STUFF WITH HER, NOT TELL ME THAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO SOMETHING THAT INVOLVES HER. YOU ASK ME.
She is still a baby and barely even has any hair, I cut her bangs, that is all she needs. I TAKE CARE OF HER NEEDS. And please stop asking your daughter/my sil to get my daughter things as she needs it when I am at your house, she is MINE, I will met her needs. Don’t ask your daughter/my sil to get her sippy, or her plate of food (that I have in my hand), or her blanket, or to put her down for a nap, etc. SHE IS MY DAUGHTER, I will get what she needs.
My sil can’t have kids, even though she wants them, and she doesn’t want to adopt. I am starting to get the impression that when we are all together at a family get together that they are pretending that my daughter is really my sil’s daughter. Cause when it’s just my mil, my daughter and me, she really doesn’t pay attention to my daughter, but when my sil is there, they are all up in my daughters face trying to exclude me from their clique. It’s just a feeling I get.
LIKE F’ING HELL IM LAYING DOWN FOR THAT! She’s mine, back off wenches! I will not tolerate this, because of my husband, I will tolerate you, but you will NOT exclude me from my daughter, it will not work. I WILL BE A BITCH IF NEED BE TO GET YOU TO RESPECT ME AND MY DAUGHTERS BOUNDRY.
When I see you I will act like everything is fine, but under my breath I will be saying have a nice day bitch. Lol.
Confession #2793
You asshole rat-fuck gutless piece of shit bastard son of a bitch. I found
out about her. I know that's why you left me. Too bad you're too much of a
coward to actually say it to my face. I hope she finds out what kind of man
you REALLY are. At first I was sad, and angry, and hurt, but right now I
think I'm glad I found out before I had wasted another five years of my life
with you. Good riddance, and go fuck yourself.
Confession #2794
Thank you for respecting my words when I say that I am not in the mood for sex. You cuddle with me, rub my back, make me laugh. Of course, after all that touching, I'M really in the mood for sex, and so you get a very willing partner who is excited and lustful for you. It is an excellent strategy.
Confession #2795
Once we got cable, our sex life went to shit. You started staying up past 2 a.m. many a night watching movies. Then the next night you'd do the same. Then the next you'd be so tired you'd go to bed by 9 p.m. I'm tired of you avoiding me. I'm tired of you disappearing into the bathroom before bed. I'm tired of smelling spit on your hands. I'm tired of walking in on you jerking off in the shower. I'm tired of all of your excuses.
Sometimes I think the only way we'd have sex would be if I cut your hands off. Course I'm sure it wouldn't take you but a few days to figure out some other way to jerk off.
When I said I can't compete with the tv and your hand, I was serious. You got offended. But its the truth.
I don't buy the "Its my anxiety issues" bullshit. You've always had "anxiety issues." We'd still manage to have sex 2-3 times a week. What makes this different (especially when you admit that your jobs stress is going down and for fuck's sake you're a few days into two-week vacation!
Its not like I'm some nasty looking creature. I look better in a pair of jeans now than I did in my early 20's. When I go out with girlfriends, I get attention from other guys. I still take care of myself.
Meanwhile, YOU'RE overweight, got a ginormous gut that rubs against me when you're on top, a tiny pecker, hairy ass and hairy back. You no longer have a jawline. Plus you're losing muscle. Your arms are getting skinny but your chest is getting wider. And you're going bald. Despite this, I still wanted to have sex with you. I still told you I found you sexy. And YOU'RE not sexually interested in ME?
Do you know how we can solve this? Maybe you should stop jerking off so much. Hmmm?
My god, how sad is that? You can't stop jerking off long enough to have sex with your wife. You jerk off so much, your sperm count was too low to get me pregnant. (This is why we haven't sought medical intervention. Because if you'd stop jerking off for gee, 48 hours? It would be a whole different story. You are a pathetic piece of SHIT. And I swear if some other guy starts finding me sexually attractive and isn't attached? I am going to fuck him. Do you know why? Because I'd rather have a real dick inside of me than a bunch of flimsy excuses.
You profess to find me sexy, you claim to love to have sex with me and you claim masturbation doesn't compare to how awesome sex is with me. But we're like roommates. (Well, roommates where one does all of the housework and childcare while the other lays on the couch, eats and jerks off.) I think you are full of shit and don't have the balls to tell me what's going on. If you no longer find me attractive, that's fine. There are other men that do.
Confession #2796
Here we are year later and you are going backwards to where we were then. I don't know if I can do this with you anymore. I am trying to help but you are an adult and make decisions by yourself. I know the doc said I am supposed to be your meter as to when you are starting to get depressed, but for how long am I supposed to hold your hand? I told you this morning you needed to check the thoughts in your head and I am not sure if you have heard me. Anyway, careful driving home, it's going to snow today and you need patience.
Love ? Me
Confession #2797
I'm completely stunned that you have pulled away from me just because you asked me some questions about my sexual history and I answered you honestly. Yes, I experimented many, many years ago. I don't see how that has anything to do with "us". But clearly, you think it does. My confession? I would never have been so open with you had I known the effect it would have on you. Then again, if something that trivial can change your feelings for me so drastically, then I guess you never loved me anyway. Better to find out now, I suppose.
Confession #2798
We have been married almost 2 years now. You are perfect. You make me
lunch for work, you bake me cookies, you wash every dish in the house
without complaining. You do anything I ask at the snap of a finger, and
you know what, its annoying! Some days I wish you'd just act like a man
and do manly things. It is not a turn on seeing you in the kitchen with
an apron on. I ask if you would like to maybe spice up our sex life
with a threesome, girl of course, and you say no! You don't watch
sports or scratch yourself, you hate video games and always tell me that
I am the most beautiful wonderful girl alive. You like cleaning toilets
and setting out potpourri. Most people question if you are gay.
Most people think I have it made, but just once I'd love for you to man
up. I am tired of wearing the pants in our relationship. I would love
you to go get your hands dirty under the hood of a car, go watch a
football game, make more money than me, and drink a beer! This isn't a
confession, I told you, and you started crying. For once, I'd love to
just be the woman in this relationship or find a real man who can make
me feel like one.
Confession #2799
This one's not about my husband -- I confess that I never expected being a mom to be THIS kind of lonely. Am I the only one? You watch all those damned sitcoms, and all the moms are always out doing things with their girlfriends and having coffee and getting together and yacking and complaining about their kids. I feel like my kids have gotten this incredible loser mom because I don't have any friends -- not in my neighborhood, not at work, not with the other mothers at school, haven't really met anyone at church. I'm always amazed when you read a novel and the author thanks her THIRTY or FORTY 'best friends' for being so kind as to read her work, or when you pick up your college alumni magazine and there's a picture of Suzie Creamcheese celebrating her fortieth birthday at the surprise party her husband threw where he invited EIGHTY people. My own parents prefer my sister in law who's blonde and cute and really young and a cheerleader, my MIL
dislikes me, my husband is not warm and loving and most the time Hostess cupcakes are MY best friend. How do the rest of you do it? Why are you all so interesting that people call you up to ask you what you thought of Michelle Obama's dress? No one cares what I think about anything .
Confession #2800
Honey, we got married 4-5 short months ago... and shortly there after, I regretted it. Your anger is tearing me apart, tearing us apart. If anyone ever heard you talk to me like the way you do, F*ck you this or F*ck you that... You're a stupid b*tch, blah blah blah, they would be astounded. It is horrible. You have no idea how many times I wonder, "why?" I've caught you many times in a lie seeing pictures on your cell phone from other women, your text messages, your pictures you send to people you find on craigslist, and your emails back and fourth to other people you find online. I've seen them, I know what's going on - you have a history, you've always been this way. You've never acted on those people that you're texting/emailing - as far as I know. You're too shy of a person do anything like that - I know this.
Just an FYI though; don't be alarmed if you come home to an empty house or your shit out in the yard. Farewell my friend, farewell. And, this past 4 years? Wasted.
PS: Every odd phone number I see on our cell phone bill from your phone, I call from my work number since it shows up private... guess what? All women. I've even added some email addresses to your spam filter. I also know all of your passwords to everything you have.
I know you recently went to the doctor for your anger, and you are now on medication which you blame me for. Shocking! You'll never ever take the blame. However you are trying to be nice again, and loving and thanking me for putting up with you and you said you talked to your dad today and your dad said, "You can't let the good ones go, you can't let her get away." And you came home from work and loved up all on me and said how much you loved me.
I know your love is there for me, but your sexual desires are still raging wild and your anger? I can't wait around forever. I made a mistake by getting married to you, however thank you for teaching me what real love really is... and it isn't you.
Love,
Your soon to be Ex-Wife
I was confession 1880; we conceived our son at a foreign clinic, through a double gamete donation -- our eggs & sperm were both too compromised to work. We are totally besotted with our son, and the only stress is hiding this HUGE secret from the small-minded small towners we live among.
I was so thrilled at the universally positive tone of the comments, that I decided maybe it wasn't crazy after all to go back and try again, even though I am four years older and the "miracle" story would look a little thin. So I took the trip end of March -- April 1, to be exact, was the transfer date. All went well and I saw two pink lines again, soon after: hurray! Except now the worries began: what if it was twins? What if I got pre-eclampsia again, instead of nosing around the edges of it as I had done the first time? What if the birth was premature and I now had a crippled baby along with an active toddler? No spare money, little spare time... how would we cope? I sat there in the dark, rocking my son, and worried. My husband and I fought bitterly over care of the toddler -- I thought he was too lenient, he thought I was too strict. When a three year old hits you you imagine him hitting the baby, and you want your man to step in rather than watch his pregnant wife get whacked! I kept wondering, should I not have gone at all....just left them in the freezer forever. At least this way there was a CHANCE things would go well, right?
Well, they did until they didn't. At my 12 week scan they told me growth had stopped at 9.5 weeks. No heartbeat. I was crushed.... and in a tiny dark place, relieved. No bedrest, no preeclampsia, no fear of dying for me. But the loss, the loss is grieved every day now. I wanted my son to have a sibling! Every problem that came up I had a plan for, and now all those plans are for nothing. I am so unbelievably bitter that we were allowed to rejoice at all, then have it snatched away for no known reason. Because they did the genetic testing, and the baby was fine....it's me that caused the problem, somehow. And this is what keeps me up at night. Every time I raised my voice and blood pressure, every time I lifted my son a little roughly, every time I strained on the toilet..... I thought, hell, the last one stuck, this one is going to have to deal. So careless. I feel like through my worry and ambivalence, I killed her.
Confession #2792
My mil is driving me nuts. She honestly doesn’t see anything wrong with trying to wedge herself inbetween me and my daughters relationship. She went behind my back and came up with a game plan about wanting to take my daughter to get her hair cut, but then didn’t have the backbone to tell me about it. She had another family member tell me that she was going to take her to a salon and cut her hair, and the appointment is next week. HELLO, no f’ing way are you doing this. When I put my foot down and said no, she made it seem like I was the bad guy. My daughter is not getting her hair cut right now and when she does I will arrange it, not you. This is my daughter, I am her gate keeper, YOU ASK ME IF YOU WANT TO DO STUFF WITH HER, NOT TELL ME THAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO SOMETHING THAT INVOLVES HER. YOU ASK ME.
She is still a baby and barely even has any hair, I cut her bangs, that is all she needs. I TAKE CARE OF HER NEEDS. And please stop asking your daughter/my sil to get my daughter things as she needs it when I am at your house, she is MINE, I will met her needs. Don’t ask your daughter/my sil to get her sippy, or her plate of food (that I have in my hand), or her blanket, or to put her down for a nap, etc. SHE IS MY DAUGHTER, I will get what she needs.
My sil can’t have kids, even though she wants them, and she doesn’t want to adopt. I am starting to get the impression that when we are all together at a family get together that they are pretending that my daughter is really my sil’s daughter. Cause when it’s just my mil, my daughter and me, she really doesn’t pay attention to my daughter, but when my sil is there, they are all up in my daughters face trying to exclude me from their clique. It’s just a feeling I get.
LIKE F’ING HELL IM LAYING DOWN FOR THAT! She’s mine, back off wenches! I will not tolerate this, because of my husband, I will tolerate you, but you will NOT exclude me from my daughter, it will not work. I WILL BE A BITCH IF NEED BE TO GET YOU TO RESPECT ME AND MY DAUGHTERS BOUNDRY.
When I see you I will act like everything is fine, but under my breath I will be saying have a nice day bitch. Lol.
Confession #2793
You asshole rat-fuck gutless piece of shit bastard son of a bitch. I found
out about her. I know that's why you left me. Too bad you're too much of a
coward to actually say it to my face. I hope she finds out what kind of man
you REALLY are. At first I was sad, and angry, and hurt, but right now I
think I'm glad I found out before I had wasted another five years of my life
with you. Good riddance, and go fuck yourself.
Confession #2794
Thank you for respecting my words when I say that I am not in the mood for sex. You cuddle with me, rub my back, make me laugh. Of course, after all that touching, I'M really in the mood for sex, and so you get a very willing partner who is excited and lustful for you. It is an excellent strategy.
Confession #2795
Once we got cable, our sex life went to shit. You started staying up past 2 a.m. many a night watching movies. Then the next night you'd do the same. Then the next you'd be so tired you'd go to bed by 9 p.m. I'm tired of you avoiding me. I'm tired of you disappearing into the bathroom before bed. I'm tired of smelling spit on your hands. I'm tired of walking in on you jerking off in the shower. I'm tired of all of your excuses.
Sometimes I think the only way we'd have sex would be if I cut your hands off. Course I'm sure it wouldn't take you but a few days to figure out some other way to jerk off.
When I said I can't compete with the tv and your hand, I was serious. You got offended. But its the truth.
I don't buy the "Its my anxiety issues" bullshit. You've always had "anxiety issues." We'd still manage to have sex 2-3 times a week. What makes this different (especially when you admit that your jobs stress is going down and for fuck's sake you're a few days into two-week vacation!
Its not like I'm some nasty looking creature. I look better in a pair of jeans now than I did in my early 20's. When I go out with girlfriends, I get attention from other guys. I still take care of myself.
Meanwhile, YOU'RE overweight, got a ginormous gut that rubs against me when you're on top, a tiny pecker, hairy ass and hairy back. You no longer have a jawline. Plus you're losing muscle. Your arms are getting skinny but your chest is getting wider. And you're going bald. Despite this, I still wanted to have sex with you. I still told you I found you sexy. And YOU'RE not sexually interested in ME?
Do you know how we can solve this? Maybe you should stop jerking off so much. Hmmm?
My god, how sad is that? You can't stop jerking off long enough to have sex with your wife. You jerk off so much, your sperm count was too low to get me pregnant. (This is why we haven't sought medical intervention. Because if you'd stop jerking off for gee, 48 hours? It would be a whole different story. You are a pathetic piece of SHIT. And I swear if some other guy starts finding me sexually attractive and isn't attached? I am going to fuck him. Do you know why? Because I'd rather have a real dick inside of me than a bunch of flimsy excuses.
You profess to find me sexy, you claim to love to have sex with me and you claim masturbation doesn't compare to how awesome sex is with me. But we're like roommates. (Well, roommates where one does all of the housework and childcare while the other lays on the couch, eats and jerks off.) I think you are full of shit and don't have the balls to tell me what's going on. If you no longer find me attractive, that's fine. There are other men that do.
Confession #2796
Here we are year later and you are going backwards to where we were then. I don't know if I can do this with you anymore. I am trying to help but you are an adult and make decisions by yourself. I know the doc said I am supposed to be your meter as to when you are starting to get depressed, but for how long am I supposed to hold your hand? I told you this morning you needed to check the thoughts in your head and I am not sure if you have heard me. Anyway, careful driving home, it's going to snow today and you need patience.
Love ? Me
Confession #2797
I'm completely stunned that you have pulled away from me just because you asked me some questions about my sexual history and I answered you honestly. Yes, I experimented many, many years ago. I don't see how that has anything to do with "us". But clearly, you think it does. My confession? I would never have been so open with you had I known the effect it would have on you. Then again, if something that trivial can change your feelings for me so drastically, then I guess you never loved me anyway. Better to find out now, I suppose.
Confession #2798
We have been married almost 2 years now. You are perfect. You make me
lunch for work, you bake me cookies, you wash every dish in the house
without complaining. You do anything I ask at the snap of a finger, and
you know what, its annoying! Some days I wish you'd just act like a man
and do manly things. It is not a turn on seeing you in the kitchen with
an apron on. I ask if you would like to maybe spice up our sex life
with a threesome, girl of course, and you say no! You don't watch
sports or scratch yourself, you hate video games and always tell me that
I am the most beautiful wonderful girl alive. You like cleaning toilets
and setting out potpourri. Most people question if you are gay.
Most people think I have it made, but just once I'd love for you to man
up. I am tired of wearing the pants in our relationship. I would love
you to go get your hands dirty under the hood of a car, go watch a
football game, make more money than me, and drink a beer! This isn't a
confession, I told you, and you started crying. For once, I'd love to
just be the woman in this relationship or find a real man who can make
me feel like one.
Confession #2799
This one's not about my husband -- I confess that I never expected being a mom to be THIS kind of lonely. Am I the only one? You watch all those damned sitcoms, and all the moms are always out doing things with their girlfriends and having coffee and getting together and yacking and complaining about their kids. I feel like my kids have gotten this incredible loser mom because I don't have any friends -- not in my neighborhood, not at work, not with the other mothers at school, haven't really met anyone at church. I'm always amazed when you read a novel and the author thanks her THIRTY or FORTY 'best friends' for being so kind as to read her work, or when you pick up your college alumni magazine and there's a picture of Suzie Creamcheese celebrating her fortieth birthday at the surprise party her husband threw where he invited EIGHTY people. My own parents prefer my sister in law who's blonde and cute and really young and a cheerleader, my MIL
dislikes me, my husband is not warm and loving and most the time Hostess cupcakes are MY best friend. How do the rest of you do it? Why are you all so interesting that people call you up to ask you what you thought of Michelle Obama's dress? No one cares what I think about anything .
Confession #2800
Honey, we got married 4-5 short months ago... and shortly there after, I regretted it. Your anger is tearing me apart, tearing us apart. If anyone ever heard you talk to me like the way you do, F*ck you this or F*ck you that... You're a stupid b*tch, blah blah blah, they would be astounded. It is horrible. You have no idea how many times I wonder, "why?" I've caught you many times in a lie seeing pictures on your cell phone from other women, your text messages, your pictures you send to people you find on craigslist, and your emails back and fourth to other people you find online. I've seen them, I know what's going on - you have a history, you've always been this way. You've never acted on those people that you're texting/emailing - as far as I know. You're too shy of a person do anything like that - I know this.
Just an FYI though; don't be alarmed if you come home to an empty house or your shit out in the yard. Farewell my friend, farewell. And, this past 4 years? Wasted.
PS: Every odd phone number I see on our cell phone bill from your phone, I call from my work number since it shows up private... guess what? All women. I've even added some email addresses to your spam filter. I also know all of your passwords to everything you have.
I know you recently went to the doctor for your anger, and you are now on medication which you blame me for. Shocking! You'll never ever take the blame. However you are trying to be nice again, and loving and thanking me for putting up with you and you said you talked to your dad today and your dad said, "You can't let the good ones go, you can't let her get away." And you came home from work and loved up all on me and said how much you loved me.
I know your love is there for me, but your sexual desires are still raging wild and your anger? I can't wait around forever. I made a mistake by getting married to you, however thank you for teaching me what real love really is... and it isn't you.
Love,
Your soon to be Ex-Wife
Sunday, January 18, 2009
True Wife Confessions 279 Cold Snap
Confession #2781
All I wanted was your time. Now I get it and I wish you would do something better with it. Get a job, seriously. You're 27 years old. Who cares if you been working and going to school for ever. Don't live off the system just cuz you can now. You're only setting us back in the long run. Were never going to be able to have kids if you keep this up. I can't stand how much of a bum you have become, it drives me insane. Stop partying. Act your age, I think you forgot you're an adult. Thats why its 2 pm on a Saturday and you're still sleeping even though we were supposed to leave at 9am to go 3 hours away. That was your idea, thanks for leavin me hangin again.
Confession #2782
This morning, you left for work about 15 minutes earlier than me. I finished getting ready, and I went out to my truck. I saw that you had taken the time to scrape the ice off my windshield before you left. I confess that I gasped and put my hand over my mouth and felt inordinately lucky when I saw that small sweet thing you did to make my morning just a little bit easier.
Confession #2783
I thought that was just one of those women who couldn't have an orgasm with oral. It was nice. I liked it..but in nearly 25 years of being sexually active...Nothing. Until last night. Holy Shit. That was amazing. Yes, It took a long time, but you were dedicated to pleasing me - and after 45 minutes or so of licking you got me there. Thank you.
Confession #2784
You like to say, "Hey let's have sex tonight" or make some sort of little announcement that you're "in the mood." But when the time comes, you're "too tired", "Too full from dinner" or you "Feel gross and need a shower." Or blah, blah. THere's always an excuse.
I got pissed at you today when you did this to me FOR THE THIRD DAY IN A ROW! I confronted you. You said, 'So. What's the big deal. At the time I say that, I mean it. Just that later on, I change my mind."
Ok. How about this: I'm going to cook you a great big dinner in two hours. (When the time comes, I'm going to make ME a Lean Cuisine. I'm going to do this three days in a row.) And then I guess I can say, 'Well, at the time, I meant it.
Fucking asshole. Just so you know, you won't be able to find three of your favorite sweaters ever again. I boxed them up and the Viet Vets truck is coming tomorrow to pick it up. They sell the clothes to make money for their program. Nothing makes me feel better than to think some strung out man on meth who's just made $10 by giving some trucker a blowjob wll be wearing YOUR FAVORITE SWEATER!
Asshole.
WHY on earth would you say, "Hey, let's have sex later on" and then give me some excuse. And when I question you, after its been several days in a row of this nonsense, you act like I'm a horrible bitch. That I'm DEMANDING sex. Please, I've stopped making advances. This is ALL you.
Course I guess I just did you a favor - you can use this argument to buy you two more weeks of not having sex with me! You'll can use this to rationalize why you masturbate too much for two whole weeks. Maybe more if you play your cards right (as in pick a few more fights.) you could stretch that out to a few MONTHS. I mean, the "I ate too much" and the "I had a stressful day" and the "I'm tired" and the "I need a shower" and the excuses only last a day.
But you don't realize you don't NEED to make these excuses. I've backed off. I don't try anything anymore. But maybe there IS a part of you that realizes you're jerking off too much and YOUR WIFE KNOWS THIS!
Confession #2785
Recently I was talking to some girlfriends. One posed the question: If you were financially independent, would you still be with your spouse? We all realized that NO, we wouldn't be. We were all staying for the same reasons -- good schools for our kids and being able to provide our children with opportunities and experiences they wouldn't have otherwise. (Not so much about designer clothes but money for music lessons or money so our kids could participate in team sports wearing safe equipment. We also worried about how divorce would affect them. But I know more women who'd stay for these reasons than I do otherwise. I found that interesting. I wonder how many of your readers would voluntarily stay if they inherited a large sum of money or won the lotto and were financially covered for the rest of their lives?
Confession #2786
I know you are cheating on me. I know you've been cheating on me for years. I was relieved when you said you had to leave for six months just so I wouldn't have to look at your lying face every day. And thanks for asking me before making that decision, you jerk. You think you can just go off and leave me with the kids so you can go play with the boys? You immature jerk. I know what you do on the computer late at night. But the most disgusting thing is that you LIE all the time. You make it seem like I'm to blame for the problems in my marriage -- what a laugh. I've never cheated on you because quite frankly, you have put me off sex for good. You think you are such a god in bed and that you "get off" on satisfying a woman -- you haven't satisfied me for years. The few times I put up with you in bed I fake it just to get it over with. And the only way I can even bring myself to do that is to pretend your someone else. You disgust me. You should take a look in the mirror one day, Mr. Sex God: you've got a pot belly and a really small dick and I laugh to myself to see that bald spot on your head getting bigger by the day.
I loved you and would have done anything for you. Until I found out that you were cheating. Oh yes: I know all about it. Don't you think I don't. But your not man enough to confess it, are you? Everytime you say you love me, I want to smash your head in. You only love yourself.
I'm only staying with you until the kids are older. And you have no idea what I've been up to while you've been gone. Take a close look at the bank statements, honey. I've been moving money around. Once I have enough, you are history.
You are a pathetic, lying, cheating scumbag -- just the kind of man I'll warn our daughters about. I'm done trying to save our marriage, now that I know you threw it away years ago.
Confession #2787
My love for you is sincere.
I have been praying and waiting on you for so long. The birth of our child was so wonderful, not my idea of how it was suppose to be. However, had I of known that being so carless would get us to where we are now I would have waited. I just can't get over your fucking lazy ass ways. Don't worry the idea of us getting together does cross my mind, but some how you manage to piss me off and remind me of why your not here. I even tell you what your problem is and you still haven't tried to fix it so screw you and this relationship. So now that you are gone someone else is temporarily filling your void. He doesn't have all his shit together either, but what he does embrace me as a woman and shows me the shit you and others have for so long been taking for granted. You know there is someone else I thought that would make you fight for us more, but you still do the same shit as before.. I know not to get too involved, but I can't promise you that if I let you come back I would let him go either.
Confession #2788
What a wonderful morning , I wake up after a long night of you touching me and making me feel so sexy. That is how you really stole my heart to begin with. Oh yeah.. your music is wonderful, the fancy restaurants were so much fun and the letters you wrote were amazing, but your touch... wow. When we were dating , you told me you wanted to wait until we were married for sexual intercourse. I had sexual intercourse for years in my first marriage, what I missed was what you were giving me, the time and touch. But honey, dont you think you really should have told me you are incapable of having sexual intercourse - that your peter has pooped? You are 15 years older than I am but with the foreplay I expected the sex to be out of this world. Well, it has been for the past 8 years, out of this world and into the world of massagers. I know.... I should have noticed this little detail in all the fore play, the fact the there was no well..... hardness. It really pisses me off. I think I have become a virgin again. I know, it sounds like I want my cake and I want to eat it too. Is there anything so wrong with that. At first it concerned you but now I think you are just darn lazy. Lay in bed, grab the massager and we can all be asleep in 5 minutes. ( It is a GOOD massager!) I want what you give me but I want to feel you inside me. I never have. That feels wrong. I mean, if I am horny and the electricity goes out - I am screwed. Well, you know what I mean. You are a wonderful man most of the time but could you please get off your ass and see why you cant have an erection? You can still jack off! YAH! FOR YOU!!!! ugh...... I think I messed up. Next time , I am marrying for money. Love didnt work. Sex is a joke. I want a house on an island a jet of my own.
Confession #2789
I miss you so badly when we aren't together. Yes, I know you need your space and I'm determined to give it to you. But I have needs too. I need to be part of a couple. All the time. Not just when it suits YOUR needs. What about MY needs? Don't they matter to you? I guess not. I feel so very alone when we aren't together. You could fix that. But you aren't. Should I give this relationship up and move on because of that?
Confession #2790
I just want to say that after this summer? Well, you can't hurt me anymore. You betrayed me. You lied to me. You absolutely devasted me. I questioned my worth, my decisions, my intelligence, competence, appearance, everything. And you still maintain that it was MY fault YOU had an affair. I'm still with you. I've been trying to work on our marriage. I've seen the therapist but you haven't. And I recently realized that I can no longer let myself fully love you. Because I would leave myself open. And I can't say for sure you WON'T do this again. Hell, YOU say, 'I can't promise you this won't happen again." And then you basically say, "If you start acting the way you used to..."
What I feel for you most of the time? Isn't love but indifference. You seem to think I should just give you my trust. You seem to think you have it again. Nope. That's just the indifference. You seem to think I've become more confident in you and the relationship. HA! THe reason I'm ok with your travel and guy's nights (you know to where you aren't home 5 out of 7 days due to work or your happy hours) is because I really like our house. But I also know I can't afford this house or school district on what I make or even could make. So I'm ok with you being gone so much. At least then I don't have to share custody time, can pay the bills AND not have to deal with you all that much.
I think if you realized alot of what I do now is due to indifference and that you can't really hurt me anymore, you'd take that as a personal challenge. You'd TRY to hurt me. Just to see if you could. You've always felt a compulsion to test my limits. But trust me. So the next time we get into a fight and you say something about how you might leave, you will be very surprised to find my response is: "I think that's a great idea. I'll help you pack."
Fucking asshole!
All I wanted was your time. Now I get it and I wish you would do something better with it. Get a job, seriously. You're 27 years old. Who cares if you been working and going to school for ever. Don't live off the system just cuz you can now. You're only setting us back in the long run. Were never going to be able to have kids if you keep this up. I can't stand how much of a bum you have become, it drives me insane. Stop partying. Act your age, I think you forgot you're an adult. Thats why its 2 pm on a Saturday and you're still sleeping even though we were supposed to leave at 9am to go 3 hours away. That was your idea, thanks for leavin me hangin again.
Confession #2782
This morning, you left for work about 15 minutes earlier than me. I finished getting ready, and I went out to my truck. I saw that you had taken the time to scrape the ice off my windshield before you left. I confess that I gasped and put my hand over my mouth and felt inordinately lucky when I saw that small sweet thing you did to make my morning just a little bit easier.
Confession #2783
I thought that was just one of those women who couldn't have an orgasm with oral. It was nice. I liked it..but in nearly 25 years of being sexually active...Nothing. Until last night. Holy Shit. That was amazing. Yes, It took a long time, but you were dedicated to pleasing me - and after 45 minutes or so of licking you got me there. Thank you.
Confession #2784
You like to say, "Hey let's have sex tonight" or make some sort of little announcement that you're "in the mood." But when the time comes, you're "too tired", "Too full from dinner" or you "Feel gross and need a shower." Or blah, blah. THere's always an excuse.
I got pissed at you today when you did this to me FOR THE THIRD DAY IN A ROW! I confronted you. You said, 'So. What's the big deal. At the time I say that, I mean it. Just that later on, I change my mind."
Ok. How about this: I'm going to cook you a great big dinner in two hours. (When the time comes, I'm going to make ME a Lean Cuisine. I'm going to do this three days in a row.) And then I guess I can say, 'Well, at the time, I meant it.
Fucking asshole. Just so you know, you won't be able to find three of your favorite sweaters ever again. I boxed them up and the Viet Vets truck is coming tomorrow to pick it up. They sell the clothes to make money for their program. Nothing makes me feel better than to think some strung out man on meth who's just made $10 by giving some trucker a blowjob wll be wearing YOUR FAVORITE SWEATER!
Asshole.
WHY on earth would you say, "Hey, let's have sex later on" and then give me some excuse. And when I question you, after its been several days in a row of this nonsense, you act like I'm a horrible bitch. That I'm DEMANDING sex. Please, I've stopped making advances. This is ALL you.
Course I guess I just did you a favor - you can use this argument to buy you two more weeks of not having sex with me! You'll can use this to rationalize why you masturbate too much for two whole weeks. Maybe more if you play your cards right (as in pick a few more fights.) you could stretch that out to a few MONTHS. I mean, the "I ate too much" and the "I had a stressful day" and the "I'm tired" and the "I need a shower" and the excuses only last a day.
But you don't realize you don't NEED to make these excuses. I've backed off. I don't try anything anymore. But maybe there IS a part of you that realizes you're jerking off too much and YOUR WIFE KNOWS THIS!
Confession #2785
Recently I was talking to some girlfriends. One posed the question: If you were financially independent, would you still be with your spouse? We all realized that NO, we wouldn't be. We were all staying for the same reasons -- good schools for our kids and being able to provide our children with opportunities and experiences they wouldn't have otherwise. (Not so much about designer clothes but money for music lessons or money so our kids could participate in team sports wearing safe equipment. We also worried about how divorce would affect them. But I know more women who'd stay for these reasons than I do otherwise. I found that interesting. I wonder how many of your readers would voluntarily stay if they inherited a large sum of money or won the lotto and were financially covered for the rest of their lives?
Confession #2786
I know you are cheating on me. I know you've been cheating on me for years. I was relieved when you said you had to leave for six months just so I wouldn't have to look at your lying face every day. And thanks for asking me before making that decision, you jerk. You think you can just go off and leave me with the kids so you can go play with the boys? You immature jerk. I know what you do on the computer late at night. But the most disgusting thing is that you LIE all the time. You make it seem like I'm to blame for the problems in my marriage -- what a laugh. I've never cheated on you because quite frankly, you have put me off sex for good. You think you are such a god in bed and that you "get off" on satisfying a woman -- you haven't satisfied me for years. The few times I put up with you in bed I fake it just to get it over with. And the only way I can even bring myself to do that is to pretend your someone else. You disgust me. You should take a look in the mirror one day, Mr. Sex God: you've got a pot belly and a really small dick and I laugh to myself to see that bald spot on your head getting bigger by the day.
I loved you and would have done anything for you. Until I found out that you were cheating. Oh yes: I know all about it. Don't you think I don't. But your not man enough to confess it, are you? Everytime you say you love me, I want to smash your head in. You only love yourself.
I'm only staying with you until the kids are older. And you have no idea what I've been up to while you've been gone. Take a close look at the bank statements, honey. I've been moving money around. Once I have enough, you are history.
You are a pathetic, lying, cheating scumbag -- just the kind of man I'll warn our daughters about. I'm done trying to save our marriage, now that I know you threw it away years ago.
Confession #2787
My love for you is sincere.
I have been praying and waiting on you for so long. The birth of our child was so wonderful, not my idea of how it was suppose to be. However, had I of known that being so carless would get us to where we are now I would have waited. I just can't get over your fucking lazy ass ways. Don't worry the idea of us getting together does cross my mind, but some how you manage to piss me off and remind me of why your not here. I even tell you what your problem is and you still haven't tried to fix it so screw you and this relationship. So now that you are gone someone else is temporarily filling your void. He doesn't have all his shit together either, but what he does embrace me as a woman and shows me the shit you and others have for so long been taking for granted. You know there is someone else I thought that would make you fight for us more, but you still do the same shit as before.. I know not to get too involved, but I can't promise you that if I let you come back I would let him go either.
Confession #2788
What a wonderful morning , I wake up after a long night of you touching me and making me feel so sexy. That is how you really stole my heart to begin with. Oh yeah.. your music is wonderful, the fancy restaurants were so much fun and the letters you wrote were amazing, but your touch... wow. When we were dating , you told me you wanted to wait until we were married for sexual intercourse. I had sexual intercourse for years in my first marriage, what I missed was what you were giving me, the time and touch. But honey, dont you think you really should have told me you are incapable of having sexual intercourse - that your peter has pooped? You are 15 years older than I am but with the foreplay I expected the sex to be out of this world. Well, it has been for the past 8 years, out of this world and into the world of massagers. I know.... I should have noticed this little detail in all the fore play, the fact the there was no well..... hardness. It really pisses me off. I think I have become a virgin again. I know, it sounds like I want my cake and I want to eat it too. Is there anything so wrong with that. At first it concerned you but now I think you are just darn lazy. Lay in bed, grab the massager and we can all be asleep in 5 minutes. ( It is a GOOD massager!) I want what you give me but I want to feel you inside me. I never have. That feels wrong. I mean, if I am horny and the electricity goes out - I am screwed. Well, you know what I mean. You are a wonderful man most of the time but could you please get off your ass and see why you cant have an erection? You can still jack off! YAH! FOR YOU!!!! ugh...... I think I messed up. Next time , I am marrying for money. Love didnt work. Sex is a joke. I want a house on an island a jet of my own.
Confession #2789
I miss you so badly when we aren't together. Yes, I know you need your space and I'm determined to give it to you. But I have needs too. I need to be part of a couple. All the time. Not just when it suits YOUR needs. What about MY needs? Don't they matter to you? I guess not. I feel so very alone when we aren't together. You could fix that. But you aren't. Should I give this relationship up and move on because of that?
Confession #2790
I just want to say that after this summer? Well, you can't hurt me anymore. You betrayed me. You lied to me. You absolutely devasted me. I questioned my worth, my decisions, my intelligence, competence, appearance, everything. And you still maintain that it was MY fault YOU had an affair. I'm still with you. I've been trying to work on our marriage. I've seen the therapist but you haven't. And I recently realized that I can no longer let myself fully love you. Because I would leave myself open. And I can't say for sure you WON'T do this again. Hell, YOU say, 'I can't promise you this won't happen again." And then you basically say, "If you start acting the way you used to..."
What I feel for you most of the time? Isn't love but indifference. You seem to think I should just give you my trust. You seem to think you have it again. Nope. That's just the indifference. You seem to think I've become more confident in you and the relationship. HA! THe reason I'm ok with your travel and guy's nights (you know to where you aren't home 5 out of 7 days due to work or your happy hours) is because I really like our house. But I also know I can't afford this house or school district on what I make or even could make. So I'm ok with you being gone so much. At least then I don't have to share custody time, can pay the bills AND not have to deal with you all that much.
I think if you realized alot of what I do now is due to indifference and that you can't really hurt me anymore, you'd take that as a personal challenge. You'd TRY to hurt me. Just to see if you could. You've always felt a compulsion to test my limits. But trust me. So the next time we get into a fight and you say something about how you might leave, you will be very surprised to find my response is: "I think that's a great idea. I'll help you pack."
Fucking asshole!
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