True Wife Confessions 311 Non Emergency

Confession #3111

You were snoring last night and woke up me up, so I asked you nicely to roll over. You got up and left the room. We have three other empty beds in this house. Your decision to sleep on the uncomfortable couch makes you a dumb ass, not a martyr.


Confession #3112

I am so happy I left you. I found the man of my dreams, my soul mate! He is the complete opposite of you, and when the girls realize you only see them when it is convenient for you, he will be there as their dad and as the positive influence on their lives. You never will change, and I feel bad for your 2 girlfriends.

Confession #3113

Dear husband and your mother,

Why do you both start projects and not complete them and leave all the stuff all over the place? Ordinarily this is fine, but today when I am doing major cleaning, not so much fun. Just bring the stuff to the basement for next time.

Thanks.
Love,
me

Confession #3114

Hey asshole! I’m very happy for you and your girlfriend. I’m so happy that she thinks you’re perfect, and the best thing that’s ever happened to her. The reason why I’m happy? I secretly pushed your needy, emotionally-abusive, man-boy ass onto that stupid woman! When I saw how great you two got along, and how attracted you were to each other, I saw my chance to get rid of you forever!

However, I recognize in all the Facebook posts about your new, wonderful life the phony happiness that we used to project. And if you were so happy, then why are you still trying to fuck me? Oh, yeah, I know why. Because you know that I have a string of men that I see, a couple of whom I’m fucking. And, they are much better in bed than you ever were! I will never be with you, either sexually or in a relationship, for as long as I live!


Confession #3115

I think you're starting to get the picture. When you do dishes, empty trash, or clean up without me having to bitch, nag, or ask my heart soars and I remember all over again why I fell in love with you and keep fighting through the stupid little things and the important big ones. It's just nice to know that someone is WILLING to share the load - it's why I make a point to thank you when I see you doing something that helps out.

We don't have kids yet, and I really want them (I never did, until recently), but I can't imagine having them with a man that can't even help out around the house. You're giving me hope that one day we will be able to have them. I'd love nothing more than to have children with you and to grow old together. I love you. Thank you for showing that you appreciate me too!

By the way, my mom is right. You do "deal with me so well" as she puts it.

Confession #3116

Been married to you for almost six years and I can honestly say that I do love you. But at times I swear it feels like Role Reversal. I thought that me being the woman, I was suppose to be clinging and demanding of ALL of your attention ALL the time, but this is so not the case. I don't know how else to say this but the truth is I'm a loner. I believe I get it from my father. That doesn't mean I don't want you around, it just means you've got to cut the shit when it comes to getting my attention. For FUCK-sake you're not a child. It's gotten so bad that I've actually named your dysfunctional behavior as "BABY HUEY SYNDROME" I mean WTF? You don't know how bad I want to cut off your fuckin air supply when you insist on setting yourself at odds with whatever has my attention at that time. I remember I even had to rent a goddamn HOTEL room so I could finish the last three chapters of a
book I was reading. UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE. I told you I was through with threatening divorce and tellin you to pack your shit, to leave and that I was going to "stick it out" But I swear to God if things continue this way,
I will still keep my promise about not putting you out, but you better damn sure believe I will be the one leaving. You have no idea how infuriating it is to not be able to come home from work and just CHILL. From the time I set
foot through the front door you are flapping your fucking gums so much that I can't even hear the damn news. And just in case you are wondering?...You are NOT smarter than me. I can tell you what the hell you're going to do
before you even know yourself, and I've been laying real low when it comes to mental (spy vs. spy) type battle of witts, you are out of your league. I lay low cause I love you and I know you have NO problem dishing it out, but
will do everything short of goin into labor if the tables were turned and you had to take it, so don't play with me. When it comes to sex...Look...I love sex just as much as the next woman, but I'm sure that no respecting
woman wants to wake up to her hair being yanked and her ass smacked at 3:00 am when she has to get up for work within the next 2 hours. That is really inconsiderate. There's something wrong with you. DO NOT make sex feel like a chore or it will be the DEATH of our sex life. This is MY body and just because you throw a damned temper tantrum when you don't get it does not make me want you anymore, but less. Sometimes, I don't even think you care whether I'm into it or not. It's just a battle of wills. I don't feel like it so you're trying to make me. That's not how it's suppose to go. It's not even enjoyable like that. Sometimes the loves scenes I read about in my books are the only thing that gets me through on the nights that I'd rather you not even touch me. Perhaps you should slow down on the pornos. That is t.v. I am a real woman. Don't you DARE spit in my crotch! That's just fucking disgusting. I hate when you treat my body like a playground. It's as if you get in the "Zone" and forget I'm there too. Nevermind the fact that I'm beginning to lose feeling in my toes cause you have the back of my knees up by my ears! And then have the nerve to hold back and take WAY TOO freakin long to bust a nut. You tell me all the time "I'm not doin it on purpose" BULLSHIT! Look the next time you pull that shit, I'm falling asleep on your ass, so you better get yours. AND BTW stop wearing my fucking socks! You stretch them out so bad that by the time I get around to it, the heels of my socks are hanging off the back of my fucking ankles. Don't use t-shirts to wipe up red kool-aid or anything else for that matter. The next time you behave like a inconsidered Jack of All Asses and eat up my personal snacks w/o asking or even replacing them...You will need a plunger to fish both of your PS3 Controls out the fucking toilet. Leave my shit alone...

Confession #3117

I am in complete love with you. When I think of the things that I have done to almost mess it up, I feel nausea. I fall deeper and deeper in love with you everyday. Thank you for giving me such a wonderful life. I love our new house and all my pretty things. I most of all love that you love me completely with all your heart.

Confession #3118

Every year when the Social Security Administration sends their annual report, all I can think of is how nice it would be if you were dead. I wouldn't have to put up with your shit and I'd get $1200 a month, which is more than you've been bringing home for the past few years.


Confession #3119

I knew it was her the whole time! The moment you spoke her name I knew it was bad news! Your affair is now jeopardizing your career in the military because I was forced to call base security when I had someone knock on my door telling me you weren't at home in bed like I thought, you were 2 streets down banging this chick... and security contacted your command....... I know you're scared but I'm not, this was the best decision ever, maybe THIS will get you to wake up and realize you've got an amazing life with the kids and me! The funny thing is that after all this and nearly 6 years of marriage, I'm still totally in love with your ass! Maybe I am a stupid bitch!

Confession #3120

I've always hated infidelity; my dad cheated on my mum and left me as a child. But now, I find myself straying. I love my boyfriend of four years and couldn't imagine being apart from him, but I have now found myself in the position of cheater. I've fucked another man twice, and love the excitement, illicitness and newness of it. He is married and loves his wife. We both know it is nothing but fun and we put a smile on one another's face. The guilt nearly consumes me and I drift between extreme horniness for my married man and devastation that I could potentially hurt my own loved one so very much. I hate that I have become like my father, and perhaps worse still, like his mistress (and now wife) but at the same time, I now feel so much more alive.

True Wife Confessions Sweet and Sour 29

Confession #281

When I ask you what time you are going to be home from where ever it is your going, tell me what time you are going to be home. Don't tell me 10pm because you think that is what I want to hear and then come strolling in at 2am blaming it on the guy driving not wanting to leave. If you aren't going to be home at 10 then CALL ME! You have a cell phone that you use ALL THE TIME...just once, use it to call me and tell me you will be late. Or better yet, quit being such an inconsiderate jerk and come home on time!

Confession #282

I can't begin to explain how frustrating it is to go somewhere with you and never leave together. Or the fact that every moment off of work is hanging with your buddies...playin' cards. You do have a family you know...remember me? our boys?Not to mention the fact that HELLO we are getting married in 3 (yes...3) weeks and you are blowing our money on poker! You know for once...just once...I would love to be the irresponsible one. I would love to party with our friends and not worry about the children, the dog we are sitting for while YOUR parents are out of town, making sure the house is clean the fridge is full of food, the laundry is done and whatever else it is that I do....just once would be nice!

Confession #283

I hope she is worth it, I hope you find out whatever it is that her first two husbands found wrong, and hope that you one day kick yourself for giving up our 10 year marriage and our 3 year old daughter for your piece of ass that was just so good. I hope your daughter never finds out or figures out that her daddy wanted a better piece of ass than to fix what was wrong with our family. I sincerely hope that the person that doesn't like kids, and doesn't ever think kids should be at a party does not become the person that helps you raise our daughter

Confession #284

I want to have an affair with a black man that has a huge penis. When i am having sex with you, i am dreaming about a big dick in me stretching me out and loving it.

Confession #285

The only reason that I say hateful things about Japanese women is
because I feel like I will never measure up to your ex-girlfriend who
was Japanese. You have told me countless times that I don't have to
compete, and somewhere, deep in my heart I believe it. I just need
to get it through to my head. I am not as racist as I sound - just a
bit envious.

Confession #286

I am so sick and tired of you always being sick, having pains in your chest, pains in your ass cheek, and just being all around sick. when I met you you seemed somewhat strong and healthy, now 17 years later I am the one caring the 50 lbs of dog food & salt for the water softener & removing the cap off your ketchup bottle. I really think that all the meds that your on is not helping you but is killing you slowly. but you won't listen to me when I tell you this and you say that your just following doctor's orders. BULL SHIT- GET A BACK BONE AND LEARN HOW TO CARE FOR YOUR HEALTH INSTEAD OF HAVING SOME QUACK PUSHING MEDS. ON YOU every time you go in for a check up.

Confession #287

I absolutely hate walking into the bathroom and stepping over your dirty clothes and towels just so I can use the toilet….Clean up after yourself you lazy scab…

Confession #288

Tonight was the last time that you speak to me like that in front of our children. When you speak to me like that you make yourself look like the immature, ignorant, and out of control asshole that you really are. The next time you choose to show your self like that I will take your flippant, "fuck off" advice to heart and leave you and your temper tantrums.

Confession #289

If you accuse me 1 more time of having a boyfriend then I WILL go cheat on you, there are 4 of them just waiting for the chance, then afterwards they'd love to come kick your sorry wife beating ass.

Oh and here's another for you, I'm filing for FULL CUSTODY with supervised visits and a DIVORCE tomorrow. I'm planning on leaving you high and dry fucker. This has been my plan for years, and my new found contact with old friends has pushed me into doing this.

Oh and I'm going out tomorrow night for my birthday and to celebrate me LEAVING you!!!

Confession #290

I hate that I'm the one who always buys you presents; you've never even written me a note before.

I hate that you always turn to me for money - never once have you bought me lunch, and you always ask me to pay you back for the things you help me buy. I must have spent hundreds and hundreds on you already, from the cumulative dollars here and there.

I hate that you tell me you felt jealous when I talked to this one guy a lot, but don't realise I felt the same way considering how 9/10 of your friends are females. I hate the way you have no inhibitions around them, never refraining from hugging them, getting all touchy-feely, then telling me that "they're just friends" when I object.

I hate the way you tell me I'm too sensitive, and that I have to learn to trust you. Trust is never given freely, and you haven't proven your worth.

I hate the way you compare me to your ex-girlfriends.

I hate the way you don't stand up for me, but stand up for other girls.

I hate the way you constantly tell me how pretty other girls are.

I hate the way you want to set up a band, a dance group, and all the other sort of shit with other girls, but never once want to include me in anything you do.

I hate the way you tell me that I don't communicate with you enough, and don't tell you the problems I have with you. And when I do, you somehow talk around it so it always ends up as my fault.

I hate the way you're always more than an hour late for our dates, leaving me to wait solitarily by the streets.

Most of all, I hate myself for not having the courage to tell you all this. I hate my heart for feeling so happy when I see you, that I'm never able to figure out whether I should leave you or not.

True Wife Confessions 28 Days Later

Confession #261

I don't say that I appreciate you enough. I spend more time bitching at you than saying how good you really are. It's wrong of me and I'm sorry. I'm also sorry that when I get PMS I turn into a raging, insane BITCH. You deserve better.

Confession #262

My dad had come over to help pack up some personal items of mine from school and family heirlooms to store in their basement because we no longer had storage space at our place. Dad left the boxes in our living room and said he'd come back to get them the next day, then the two of us went to dinner. A few months later, my husband and I hit a rocky patch in the marriage. I went to stay with my folks. While in the basement, I found the boxes dad had packed. I unpacked them and found that items were missing. It turns out that while Dad and I were at dinner, my husband had carefully untaped each box and stole some items. Then he taped them back up so we'd never know it happened. The divorce papers came last week. THANK YOU GOD!

Confession #263

Your penis is unusually tiny. Maybe 4 inches? When not erect, I can't even tell you have one. I can't feel anything when we have sex. Here's a big reason for having sex before you get married. Or rather, a SMALL reason. Try before you buy, ladies!

Confession #264


I'm pretty sure that you know how much money I spend and you almost never call me on it. Well, maybe the time I spent 600 bucks at Hannah Anderson and you made me take half of the things back. But still

Confession #265

For the milionth time, I will never swing with you. I won't go to swing clubs or swing parties just to, "Check it out." You think they're going to be hot models? Reality check, honey. Most of them are white trash and most of them don't use protection because, "We're all married, so we're safe." Why didn't you tell me you were into this germy disgusting lifestyle BEFORE we got married?

Confession #266

The fact that you have stayed with me through all of my mental health issues, and have rarely called me crazy out loud, even when you are thinking it in your head? You took "the good with the bad" part of our vows seriously and I am eternally grateful.

Confession #267

My husband is dead set against sex toys. He asks me why I need sex toys if I have him around to satisfy me? I say it's something fun to add to our sex life. He said it's either him or the sex toys. So when he goes to work, I get out my hidden collection of sex toys and do myself silly. Maybe my husband does have something to fear. The sex toys are a lot better in bed than him.

Confession #268

It was just two days after I started the Pill and wasn't protected against pregnancy yet. I asked my husband to put on a condom before we had sex. He agreed. He leaned over to the nightstand and made a big effort out of opening a condom wrapper and putting it on. When he came, I felt it. I pushed him off me and saw there was no condom. He had MIMED putting on the condom and had hidden the condom under the bed. I demanded to know why. He said, "You're not gonna get pregnant, so what's the big deal?" It was the first moment that I felt fear in my heart that I had married the wrong man.

Confession #269

Do you not wipe after taking a dump? I do your laundry, you know, and I don't think you use toilet paper.

Confession #270

I love that you are the one who bakes for all school functions. Me? I would buy something, but you? In the kitchen, baking giant cookies or super fudgey browines.

True Wife Confessions 310 dandelion blooms

Confession #3101


I can't say this to you because I want you to sign the damn divorce papers. When you said you finally got the courage to look at them this weekend,bullshit. You're holding on to them so that I'll file taxes with you for last year - no other reason, you asshole. And when you said you didn't look at my documents and just handed them to the accountant because its none of your business - it is everything I have not to tear you to pieces. YOU are not a noble or honorable person. YOU are the asshole who fucked around on me during our marriage and yet withheld sex from me for the past 3 years. And during the last year when you're going through alcohol detox and I was the good wife supporting you and being patient for the sex to return - you were drinking and fucking around. So, fuck you asshole. There is nothing honorable about you. Just sign the mother fucking divorce papers and get out of my life. I don't need you.


Confession #3102

I know you are planning a surprise party for my 40th birthday - because you are so Terrible at being sly and keeping secrets - and I hear you talking on the phone to people who must be flying or driving in and while you try to be vague, you just Aren't. And it is sweet. Terribly, terribly sweet, and I love you for it.

Confession #3103

I just give up.


Confession# 3104

Dear hubby,
On days where I'm super pissed off and in a foul mood when you walk in the door its a good suggestion to ask how you can help instead of telling me to pull my tampon out and get over it! You may work outside the home but what I do is work too! We have 3 kids together...all under 5. I don't just sit on my ass reading magazines and tan! Some days I don't even get to take a shower because I'm so busy! I love you dearly and would love to be in a better mood but when I'm required to do everything around the house plus all the errands and what not because heaven forbid you lift a finger or you'll freak out like a baby, it stresses me out to no end! Oh and one more thing...I was happy to get you the motorcycle you've always wanted, because you do work hard, but when you wrecked it being stupid without hesitation I gave you the money we were gonna use on a down payment for a new mini van..... And you had the audacity to be an ass for weeks following and you didn't even act like you appreciated what I did for you, I wanted to strangle you! Please PLEASE PLEASEEE grow up and realize that you have a great life! I love you more than you know!
Your stressed out wifey!

Confession # 3105

We've been together almost 8 years....and there are still no signs of us getting married. Both of our families ask us if we talk about it or have any plans. It's the same story: "Well, I want to get my career going and pay down some of my student loans before starting a family".

It's time to get real: we are in our mid-20's, and we've been together since high school. The real reason that we are not ready to get married is because you still work a part-time job and live with your sister, and I refuse to consider marriage because I am afraid of having to support a whole family on my own.

I love you with all my heart. You are my best friend, and I don't know what I would do without you. However, I will leave you in a year if you don't have your shit together. You need to grow up and realize that your current situation is not a good look. I won't bring you around my co-workers or to alumni parties because I am always embarrassed for them to ask you what you do for a living!

You have had so many epiphanies since you graduated from high school. After the first two, I really thought you were going to get it together and finish college and get a full-time job. But then after the fourth and fifth ones, I stopped paying attention. I don't care what kind of dreams you have, or what the little voice in your head told you, I am telling you to get an adult job and learn how to be self-reliant. You don't even have to finish school (college isn't for everyone)!!

The reason I get so irritated with yous sometimes is because I truly think that you don't care. You are comfortable being on the bottom, but I am not! It is time to put down the XBox controller and be a real man.


Confession # 3106

We've been together just over 5 years, you are 3 and a half years younger than me. I turn 32 later this year, and although I didn't want kids in the early part of our relationship.. I do want one now. Not lots, even one would be great. You know I feel this way these days, and although you don't have the same drive that I do, when I was pregnant last year, you were even more excited than I was. That pregnancy didn't turn out well, in fact, it saw me in an ambulance being rushed into emergency surgery with a ruptured tube on my left side. (ectopic) I lost that tube, and face a greatly diminished chance of ever having a successful pregnancy now. I hang on to the idea that we could still have a baby together, but cry to myself with every period. You tell me you want to stay with me forever, but here is the thing... if we can't have a baby together, I don't know if I do.
You would make the best father around. You are kind caring devoted artistic and fun. You cook the most amazing meals anyone could wish for. You make me die a little when you hang out with other people's babies or young children, the way you just get them, the way they just love you. I would give up any kind of material success to have that, you interacting in that way with our child. I would give every single thing for that. But if we can't have a child, I feel differently. If we can't, then I don't really know if I want to. See, you are pretty hopeless with money... You are an artist, I get it.. those two skills don't go hand in hand.. I on the other hand earn so much less than you, yet still managed to save the deposit for our home, pay the bills, put something aside for (hopefully) some improvements on our home. If there is no baby, and I have spent the prime years of my life where that was possible with you.. then what is the point? I am not afraid of being poor, but would I really choose it for no reason? If we can't have a baby, do I really want to spend the rest of my life bailing you out of your credit card debt?

Confession # 3107

I am furious about the amount of money you spent on the new TV (without consulting me, I might add), the amount of money we spend for satellite TV every month, and the amount of time you spend watching the damn thing. Your life, your childrens’ lives, and our life together are all passing you by while you sit in front of that giant time and money sucking hole every day.

Confession # 3108

I see the texts on your phone, dumbass. I know where you are going and who you are seeing. I care less about who you are fucking and more that you think I am so oblivious that I wouldn't notice. You haven't been able to out think me in 15 years, what makes you think you can now?


Confession # 3109


We have had a rough last 5 years, I will admit. We have been through everything imaginable while our life took a whole new shape & form. I am going to be honest, I don't know how we have made it, but somehow we have. I feel closer to you than I have in our 15 years of marriage & our kids have only benefitted from us growing closer. I know that your ego took a huge hit when you lost your job & we solely survive on my income now, but you took a huge step and started back to school. You have no idea how much i respect you for how hard you are trying. I just don't know how to tell you that. Everytime I try, you just say "Well you did it for us, so I can too." I am not trying to compare us, I just want you to know how I feel. Do I get frustrated sometimes with you & your procrastination, YES! Does that mean I don't love you and I'm going to leave you? No, it just means I'm frustrated with you at that moment. After everything that we have been through I know you think I'm gonna leave, but I LOVE YOU and You are stuck with me, I'm not going anywhere. We have made it through this we can make it through anything. <3



Confession # 3110

Sleeping in separate bedrooms may be what saved our marriage. I don't have to hear you snore, or listen to the radio or fight with you about if it is too hot or too cold. I know it sounds odd, but I like when you visit...then go back to Your bed in the other room. This works out really well for us and when we first did it, I thought it signaled an end to our marriage. It may have been a new beginning.

True Wife Confessions Round 27

Confession #261

I've reached the end of my rope. I am no longer in
love with you. Your fart jokes are no longer amusing.
When you touch me, I just want to push you away. I am
in love with someone else. The only reason why I keep
you around is for the paycheck, as shitty as it is. As
soon as I start making more money, your ass is gone.

Confession #262

I really think it is your job to teach our little boy how to ride a bike. The fact that you have never taken the time to teach him how is driving me insane! Especially since you spend at least 15 hours a week on yours!

Confession #263

Couldn't you, just once, say SOMETHING during sex? Tell me I'm pretty, tell me I'm hot, tell me I smell great, tell me I turn you on...SAY SOMETHING--even if you have to lie a little bit! Your moans and groans just don't always do it for me...throw me a frickin' bone, PLEASE? Haven't you ever read a magazine article about women and sex before--it all starts in the brain, my love! Tickle me THERE before you go anywhere else! Maybe if you had been saying that kind of stuff all along in our 20 years together, I wouldn't have gained all this weight. I would've known I was attractive and not just some lump you want to screw a couple of times a week just because I'm there.

Confession #264

Why is it that you can do that fantasy role playing with your friends and
on-line but you can't role play with me in bed?

Confession #265

I am leaving you because I hate your fu*&ing kids

Confession #266

You have absolutely no right to complain about our sex life when you turn down shower sex all the time simply because you don't like to bathe. Oh, and no, I won't put my mouth there till you're clean. Why is this hard to understand?

Confession #267

It really hurts when I tell you exactly how I want you to make love to me
yet you never listen. You start us right back into the same position doing
the same thing. Maybe a little change won't make it feel like such a chore
for you.

Confession #268


Sometimes when you sleep, I lay by your side and start to cry. I picture what it would be like if you died in a tragic accident. To be honest, I don't think I could keep on living if that happened.

Confession #269

What guy walks around with hair down to his butt anymore? Oh, you're keeping it REAL, staying true to your ROCKER ROOTS? God, even Tommy Lee has short hair these days. You look like a woman. A really ugly woman. And I'm sick of everyone thinking we're lesbian lovers. It's embarassing. YOU'RE A TINY, SKINNY MAN. You cannot pull off super long hair. CUT IT, you 80s hair metal band looking reject.

Confession #270

Your breath stinks 24 hours a day. What died in your mouth? Maybe you should see a doctor. Why do you think I keep mints in both cars and almost every room in the house? If you get into bed and want to have sex with me one more time without gargling first, I am going to puke on you. How can you not be aware that your mouth stinks that badly?

True Wife Confessions Like the 309

Confession #3091

My middle daughter’s father is not who she thinks it is. He’s not who everyone assumes he is.

Confession #3092

Let start off my saying, I love you. I don't know how I could have gotten through the toughest part of my life without you. Now that we've been together for quite some time I've started to realize what kind of person you are. I am out trying to get an education and improve my life. You moved here for me and I thank you for that. However, I'm not so sure anymore that it was the right decision. I get irritated with you all the time, we both know it. I miss our relationship from the very beginning, how we were crazy in love with each other. But, I still question whether it was the right thing. We were young and alone. I hate how you sit at home all the time doing nothing but playing your stupid games. You don't understand that I want you to do something with your life. I'm tired of being your everything, you need something else besides me to live for. I don't want to be your everything anymore. I feel like I can't tell you this because you've moved here for me. I feel obligated now. I think I'm failing classes because of you. You pull me away every spare minute I have. I hate how I look next to you, we don't match. We have completely different outlooks on life. We are opposites. I don't know how I still love you. I'm scared of being alone and you're the only one who wants to be with me. How? Why? I hate how much I love you. I don't want to let you go but I'm slowly killing myself.

Confession #3093

When you ask me if I'm still attracted to you even though you've gained 60 pounds in the past short years I've been married to you and I say "of course I do" I'm lying. I think its disgusting how much you've let yourself go. For God's sake, can you at least take a shower before you try to hit on me? I find it absolutely repulsive. I do still love you though. You really need to get your fat ass to the gym

Confession #3094

I am tired of feeling like I'm not enough! Pretty enough, skinny enough, sexy enough... I work hard at not making him feel insecure, but he has no problem with making me feel insecure, almost all the time. Sex is mediocre, I don't know if I've ever had an orgasm, but he will never find that out. Finances are tearing us a part, we are having a lot of trouble trying to make ends meet. I am now pregnant with our second child, but I don't feel the desire for this relationship with my husband anymore. I thought he would not only be my first, but also my last. I know I still love him, but I don't think I'm in love with him anymore.

I'm only 25 and sometimes I wonder if I will find someone else who will want me with my two children. For now anyways, my focus will be on my children and my career for the next couple of years. I feel I fell in love too young and I'm now paying for it. I am however, one of the lucky ones who obtained a college education, during the course of marriage, raising a child and finding myself and still trying to find myself for that matter. I'm ready to be comfortable in my own skin. Sometimes I wonder if it's necessary to have someone. I'm sick of the heartbreaks and disappointments! My children already have a father. I'm definitely not looking to jump into a serious relationship. Marriage at a young age has taken my youth. Mommy I think just needs "friends with benefits" in the future and to just focus on my kids and career.

Confession #3095

My lover proposed to me. Now what to do about my husband....

Confession #3096

i just finished cleaning the bathrooms- one of which is covered in your foot powder and a pain in the ass to get up. i also just finished picking up dirty clothes off of the floor- and there were more of yours than the kids! and, i just finished washing out a gross coffee mug that was left in your car for way too long. and as much as i want to be annoyed and nag you when you get home, i won't do it because you know what? you are the best damn husband i could ever hope for. you're human, and so am i... and all of the crap you put up with from me without so much as an eye roll- you deserve a medal. i hope we can be this happy for the rest of our lives- thank you mister.

love, your adoring wife

Confession #3097

If you don't start trying harder to make good memories before you leave, you might find a family that doesn't want you when you come back


Confession #3098

We've been divorced for eight months and I am never going back to you. You can keep sending me detailed love letters, texts, and e-mails, but it will not get you what you want. I gave you a million chances to change while we were married. Now, I am done. That is the magic of divorce.

By the way, when you ask if I have a "Hot Date" just because I say "no," it doesn't mean that I don't have a date. It just means that I don't know if it will be hot or not.


Confession #3099

I love you, but you're a real assmunch lately.


Confession #3100

Yes, when all is said and done I did leave for another man. But I tried to fix everything.
I tried to share my passions with you. You hated them and told me so. I was not allowed
to sing. I was not allowed to enjoy theatre. I was told my interests were stupid.
You wouldn't hold your daughter. You wouldn't get up with her at night. If she had night terrors,
you got mad at her. You would not do things with her because "it did not interest you". You would sit in the
garage and smoke pot. That is what you would do day in and day out. And that was "awful",
being "forced" to smoke in the garage. It was an injustice. Your idea of us bonding was to have me get stoned
with you. That would bring us closer.

So yeah, I left you, go figure.

True Wife Confessions 26 letters of the alphabet

Confession #251

The reason I cut you off and finish your sentences sometimes in public is
to keep you from sounding like an idiot

Confession #252

I am in love with someone else and SHE does things to me that you could never imagine!!!

Confession #253

I could never tell you, but I don't like having sex with you anymore. I don't find you attractive. When we have sex I close my eyes and think of someone else, perhaps a famous someone.

Confession #254

I think you are a closet gay...no sex for several years is one thing but your interest in pre nubile females and your too long hugs of any zipper skinny woman
give you away...go ahead find a male lover because I don't give a shit what you do anymore.

Confession #255

After nearly 12 years of being married when will you learn that when you
insist on blowing my back out at 4am in the morning, I will not be up at
5:30 to make you breakfast before you leave for work.

Confession #256

I know that I don't get out by myself all that often, but when I do, I expect the same things that you expect. You want to come home to a clean house, as well as kids that have been fed, bathed, and are either ready for bed or have been put to bed for the night. I do not enjoy walking in the door and seeing my nice clean living room trashed beyond recognition. I do not enjoy walking in the door with three baskets of wet clothes (because you won't get off your lazy ass and fix the washing machine) and being told that I have to give the kids a bath at 10pm. I do not enjoy being told that I'm not doing my job because the house doesn't meet showroom standards while you sit on your ass and play computer games all day long. I'm not your mother, your maid, or your children's nanny. You really shouldn't be surprised that I'm in the mood only once a month, if that.

Confession #257

You are not now, nor ever, going to have your own business again as a graphic artist. You have no skills for that. Suck it up and be happy you have a job at Home Depot.

Confession #258

I hate having sex with you! It used to be wonderful, but lately, not so much. Because I would like a little love and tenderness. I would like to feel as if I were loved and cherished. I am tired of nothing but dirty talk. I don't need to be told what a dirty bad girl I am each and every time. I don't want to hear your every kinky fantasy. Especially because I know that you have acted them out online many times before, and are using those fantasies to get off with me. It hurts. It hurts alot. Is it any wonder that I don't ever want to have sex with you?

Confession #259

There are so many things about you that I cannot stand. Your breath is terrible, you stink b/c you don't shower every day. You are so arrogant and stubborn it makes me want to hit you. You don't care about anyone but yourself. You bitch about money but don't hesitate to buy something that you want. Your whole family is nuts. But the worst thing of all is I hate the kind of father you are. Your children get more attention from you when they are being disciplined than any other time. And it drives me crazy that you always feel the need to jump in when I am trying to discipline. No wonder they don't listen to me. You never give them a chance. I think your parents are lazy and selfish and so are you.

Confession #260

I want to hear that you love me, that you miss me, and that you think of me at all. I don't want to ramble about stupid shit. I want to know I'm dealing with all this insanity for a reason. I tell you all the time how much I love you. Why can't I get even a fraction of that in return? Sometimes I wonder if you love me-if you ever loved me because you never even say, "I love you," unless I say it first. Do you really? What do you love about me, then? Why can't you just freaking talk to me?

True Wife Confessions 25 Electoral Votes

Confession #241

If you do not stop smoking as you promised me 8 years ago, I will leave you. Since we found out you have to quit smoking for us to have a baby, I will NOT waste my life waiting for you to stop smoking so I can have a child. There are many men out there that would love to have a child with me. If you don't stop, I will walk out on you. And YES, I am right on the verge!

Confession #242

You don't know how I want to hit you when you make that stupid, goony, idiotic looking face that you think is so funny. You've been doing it our entire married life and I HATE it!


Confession #243

Why do you keep bitching at me about getting a job? Do you not realise that we have 5 children, and that is my job? My day starts half and hour before yours, and I don't get the benefit of regular breaks. I care for all 5 kids, clean the house, cook the meals, do your laundry. You come home, and go straight to the kitchen to fix your plate. Never mind the fact that I'm standing there feeding babies, and I'm always the last person to eat, usually eating while I'm cleaning up the kitchen. Then you retire to your chair while I bathe babies, and you watch tv. I put kids to bed, and then you decide its time to complain that I'm not giving "it" up enough. Then we go to bed, only I'm up another 2 or 3 times a night with the little one, while you snore and roll into my spot....yet on top of all this, I'm supposed to go get a job..you're an ass.

Confession #244

I purposefully play passive/aggressive with you: it's what makes our marriage work. Sometime when I say things like "Man, I smell.", "I forgot to brush my teeth today.",or "I really need to [insert household chore here]." I really mean you. I'm sorry that I play this game with you, but if I come right out and say what I want, you get all pissy. This way I let you think that you had an original thought or that you're doing me a favor and we both win.

Another thing, when I say "I'm sorry that I'm not that good at sex."... yeah, I mean you again.

Confession #245

Why is it that I am expected to instantly forgive and forget when you screw up big time but you act like I've betrayed you if I make even the smallest mistake? Then you hold it against me for days or even weeks. I used to be perfectly willing to forgive and forget, and I have forgiven you for some huge things and never brought it up again, but after years of you refusing to do the same I just resent you more and more and find it harder and harder to forgive you for anything. And all of those things that I just let slide before, things that I had let go of long ago, are actually coming back to me and are becoming important to me again. And I hate you for it sometimes.

Confession #246

Sometimes when my girlfriends are complaining about their husbands, I nod my head and make something up about how my husband never picks up his socks. Really he’s perfectly handsome, smart, sexy, and motivated and he loves me to bits. I just feel bad bragging about it in the face of my poor friends' marital problems.

Confession #247

dear husband
I love you and our children. I don't mind cleaning up
after them but you are a grown man and more then
capable of putting your things away and cleaning up
after YOURSELF.
I'm not asking you do change diapers, do laundry,
clean up spilled juice or wash dishes--just put away
the lemonade after you pour a glass (or drink out of
the container as the case may be) take you dishes to
the kitchen sink, please don't leave them next to you
recliner; sometimes playing children knock them over,
the contents may spill or the dish may break.
Please put your dirty clothes in the laundry room so
that I can wash them, I am tired of finding dirty
socks and shirts under the furniture.
Please don't complain about the house being messy when
I've been outside mowing and raking all afternoon. I
can't be in 2 places at once.
And finally, I cannot read your mind-don't make faces
and complain about dinner when you are asked what
you'd like and tell me you don't care or say whatever.
just shut it and eat the damn lasagna.
love, your cranky wife

Confession #248

Yes, you designed and oversaw the construction of this big beautiful house
that we live in and I love you for it, but sometimes you fail to remember
that it was my credit and financial strength that made the financing
possible. Your credit was jacked up when we met, remember.

Confession #249

How is it that you can manage and supervise an 80 man crew in building 10
million dollars complex, but you can not get 2 little 5 year olds to pick up
their toys in their room? HUH? Why is that such a hard task?


Confession #250

Why is okay for your "little girls" to cry themselves to sleep when you want
to get busy, but when I am trying to get things ready for the next day I
should stop and pick them up?

True Wife Confessions 308 for Snipe Hunting

Confession #3081

Instead of resolutions I do themes: this year for 2010 is empowered. Just another term to hide the word selfish. I plan on being selfish for once and that means you need to get the hell out of my way and let go of my ankle. I wrote about a year or so ago bitching about a Christmas stunt you pulled and since then I have daydreamed of a divorce. I thought that I could pretend to make things happy, lie to myself, or just hang on for the kids...but the thing is I can't do it anymore. You are killing me mentally and physically making me sick. I have been sick the past two days playing our marriage over and over in my head and I fucking refuse to do it anymore. I consider this an amputation...though I could sure use the limb, I rather hop. As soon as I get my tax return I am taking you off the tit you thought you would suck on the rest of my life.

I wish I had the directions to la la land that a good portion of the world's population lives....but frankly it seems to crowded.

Confession #3082

the sex...used to be good. now, it's almost like you are on auto pilot and if I throw in an ooooh or an ahhhh at appropriate moments, you proclaim yourself "the man" and declare that our sex life is fantastic. it's not. those sex toys I bought at my friend's party? I didn't buy them "just to be nice" like I said. they get used quite frequently as soon as you leave the house.


Confession #3083

I have been happily married for 7 years. I recently came across this anonymous chat website *****, that lets you chat with a random stranger at the click of a button. It has become almost an addiction for me. I have problems making friends because of shyness, self-esteem issues but I am able to be freely and truly myself on this silly website. However, several of the best conversations I've had have been with men. I find it thrilling to know that they find me interesting and even sexy. They ask me questions and I get to hear their thoughts about life and love. The only one I've ever felt I could do this for and with is my husband. He was my first boyfriend, my first kiss, my only lover. Talking to other men like this makes me feel powerful and it makes me feel sexier. I have not told my husband that I chat like this. Three times now I have begun chatting/emailing certain men outside of this random arena who I've had very deep and meaningful conversations with. We've even exchanged pictures. Two of the "relationships" have had sexual questions posed and answered. I've even sent one of them a couple of sexy (not nude) pictures.

I wonder if this counts as emotional cheating. I realize that the world of the internet poses many perception distortions - I know only what these men choose reveal and I have not built a life with them. We've never even truly met. But we know so much about each other, if everyone is being truthful.

This helps me feel better about myself and there is no real harm in it so I feel like it is okay. I never plan to meet, speak with on the phone, interact with on camera or interact any other way with them outside of chat and email. It has led to increased sex with my husband because I feel more self-confident that I really am attractive and sexy, not just to him. Is this the same as flirting with co-workers or receiving compliments or appreciation from the opposite sex about your ideas and personality? My husband goes out to work and has many interactions with women. Am I not just searching for the same type of validation?


Confession #3084

I don't like having sex at midnight or 1 AM when we're both exhausted and ready to crash. I do it because you're not interested in sex at any other time of the day. Why is that? You told me that was a problem in your marriage; the only time the two of you had sex was after everything else was done for the night and you were both tired. Why is it that you've set us up for that same cycle? I do approach you at other times, but you always shoot me down. Is it because you need to pop a little blue pill and wait for it to kick in? Fine; I don't mind. Just tell me and I'll give it another shot in an hour. But those pills aren't something we can talk about, are they. I know you take them and you know I know, but talking about it is strictly forbidden.

Confession #3085

I know that we laugh when you wake up mad at me after dreaming that I cheated on you. But it still hurts my feelings that you have those cheating dreams so often.

Confession #3086

In 8 to 12 weeks our divorce will be final. I am filled with joy.... and sadness. We were the couple everyone thought would make it... until I left. Then I had so many people telling me how glad they were I left, how I should of done it years ago. And then there were the apologies and confessions. My, my you did get around... even more than I had guessed and or knew. Oh yes.... our "open" relationship as long as it suited you. We both know why I rarely ever took advantage of that.... we both know I would leave. And I did. And I AM SO HAPPY! I miss you on some level.... but when I hear our daughter's weekend with you consisted of TV and you going out to "smoke"? I feel joy in my decision and I know I will never regret it.

Confession #3087

I confess -- I don't believe you. That woman showed up at our backdoor at midnight. You were in the shower when I answered it, and she said she needed to talk to you. I said you were busy. She said it was important, pushed past me, went straight to the bathroom and opened the door. I didn't hear what she said to you, but I heard you yell at her to get the fuck out of your house.

On her way back out, she told me you'd been lying to both of us, that you'd been seeing both of us all along, and that she'd been seeing you off and on for 18 years. When I asked you about it, you said you hadn't been with her for over 2 years (since we got together).

But why would a woman come cause trouble after 2 years? I have no proof so I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt. But deep down? I don't believe you.

Confession #3088

Amor,

Thank you, you made my day yesterday by calling me at work. I know it has been hard for us, just when i thought you have given up on us, you surprised me by calling me. We are going to make this work one way or another.

I love you so much, it makes no sense to either of us but I do. And always will..

Confession #3089


I don't like your daughter- she's too skanky for my liking and I worry when she's around my children. I have tried and tried to be as nice and kind to her as possible, but she is sadly a reflection of the person who is raising her. Her mother, with whom she lives in another state, is pushing 40 and has been unemployed except for a brief, unsuccessful stint as a stripper...and she brings your daughter with her when she visits her "sugar daddies" (as your ex calls them) and "uncles" as your daughter calls them. At one time, one of mommy's sugar daddies' sons your daughter at 10 years old called her "boyfriend"- saying mommy would leave her with the son while she spent time with Uncle xxx so that Uncle xxx would "pay for mom's boob job". Why does that NOT worry you? YOU ARE SO SO BLIND!

Sometimes I don't want to be married to you because you are too stupid to get your daughter the Professional Help she so badly needs. And she needs an HPV shot, and at the age she is now, she needs to be on Birth Control. How can you say "everything's ok, my ex is a wonderful mother" when someone (the school? neighbors?) called Child Services MULTIPLE times? Can't you see by the way your daughter has turned out that she is merely a Meal Ticket for your ex? Your daughter was caught skanking in school- on the playground- don't you think that should have been the last straw to push you to fight for custody? She tried to have sex with the neighbor boy and I caught and stopped her, and you screamed at ME and called me a liar- maybe I should have just allowed you to suffer the embarassment of the her skank reputation to circulate our neighborhood? Or maybe she would have been knocked up at age 11-12? Maybe I should be so callous and say and do nothing to help her anymore. Why am I the only adult in her life who tries to help her? You are so blind and I'M NOT STEPPING IN ANYMORE, IT'S YOUR STUPID PROBLEM, I HAVE SO MUCH TO DO WITH MY OWN KIDS!

Why won't you confront your ex about exposing your daughter to her lifestyle? Are you enamoured with her fat, g-string wearing, mental health issues mom so much that you will allow your daughter to continue to suffer? Why would you allow your child to be raised by a Drug Addict? How pathetic. I mean, you are so stupid that you knocked up a Stripper/Hooker while paying for her services, AND THEN YOU MARRIED HER. ALL THIS WHILE SHE WAS LIVING WITH ANOTHER MAN. IS THIS CHILD EVEN YOURS? Dummy...why have you never demanded a paternity test????? STOP COMPLAINING TO ME ABOUT NOT HAVING MONEY BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR CHILD SUPPORT OUT OF YOUR ASS because YOU are the FOOL who (maybe) knocked up a HOOKER! STUPID- THAT"S WHAT HOOKERS DO, GO FOR YOUR MONEY, DUMBASS!

You are so wonderful with me and our family, that I feel conflicted whenever I have to witness the train wreck that is your daughter....I hate it when she visits. YOUR DAUGHTER IS A TOTAL TRAIN WRECK AND ALL ME AND THE KIDS CAN DO IS WITNESS THE MESS. I wonder are you truly this Colossally Stupid? Dense brained? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, MAN? If the community you served ever knew of this part of your life, your upstanding facade would be totally SHATTERED.

Confession #3090

When you say "I wish I could just die", it makes me angry. Because your children deserve to know their father. Because I'm at the point where I'm starting to agree with you. Because you're not willing to admit that you're depressed, and you need help. I feel like a bad person when I think "go ahead, get this shit over with, I'm still young, I can marry again." It's not fair that you dump everything on me. It's NOT my fault that you have some physical problems that need to be addressed, and YES, I believe you're probably 75% at fault because of your horrible diet and alcoholism. If you're going to continue to drink yourself to death, I'd like to request that you move it along. I'm not interested in spending the next 20 or 30 years watching you devolve into your grandfather - a man whose alcoholism you seem to revere. Get your priorities straight, you idiot. You're almost 40, and you're behaving like a goddamn 12 yr old. And stop telling me I want to divorce you, because one of these days I just might.

True Wife Confessions 24, Sans Kiefer Sutherland

Confession #231

Sometimes I wonder if we should really be together. If it weren't for our
daughter, I'm not sure I would put up with your bullshit.

Confession #232

Have I told you I hate your family? From your alcoholic brother, to your
sister and her inane blathering about nothing, to your father who watched
me from our living rooom, drinking coffee, while I shoveled 18 inches of
snow from our driveway at 6am before I went to work, to your mother who
said "I'll just make some dinner for me and your father" after I came home
from work and picking up our son from football. I mean, hey, don't bother
with us.... we aren't tired or hungry and god knows, we don't have to
eat...... assholes. Next time you go into the hospital and they come to
"help", tell them I'd rather sit through a discussion of third world
politics with Paris Hilton.... at least it will be shorter than their visit
and I know there is an end in sight.

Confession #233

Why do you get pissed off when I ask you not to say inappropriate things in front of our children? I appreciate the fact that you think I'm sexy, but when our seven year old son snuggles up to me and lays his head on my chest, don't look at him and say "hey, those are MINE." That is just wrong, and could be confusing to a child.


Confession #234

I rarely ever orgasm with you. I've faked it 99% of the time that I've been with you. Now that we have two small children, and you continue to not show me any day to day affection, or appreciation, yet have the ability to criticize multiple times a day, I loathe every time we have sex. I find no enjoyment in it. It's all an act. I just go through the motions and wait for it to be done and when it is, I just feel cheap and used up. You're sucking the lively hood out of me, and I just let it happen because I would never be able to support the kids with out your income

Confession #235

Please, for the love of GOD, tell your friends that I don't want to host guests EVERY NIGHT!!! I don't want to go to someone's house to hang out every night that we don't have guests, either. I want some time, just the two of us, to run around the house in our underwear, so to speak. I hate that we can't even spend our ANNIVERSARY together without five different people trying to convince us to go hang out with them even after I've politely declined their offer, explaining that it's our anniversary!!! Some of these friends are in their thirties and forties. They should be grown-up enought to take NO for an answer the first time, not to mention the tenth time I have to say it! If you don't tell them, so help me God, I'm going to tell them, and when I do, we just might have plenty of one-on-one time together for quite a while, get it? And BTW, don't try saying it's her just the same as him, because she's told me she'd rather the two of them spend some alone time at their own house, if she could get him to. You could also be a man and tell them NO yourself, instead of telling them to ask me every time! Grow some, and JUST SAY NO!!

Confession #236

I remember telling you after dating for a month that I had done some things I was not proud of and that if you couldn't handle it you were free to leave. Basically, I would never tell you my NUMBER. Give you the LIST. And I wouldn't want to know yours. You hugged me and said that you didn't care what I had done before. You loved me for who I turned out to be because of those experiences. But, after three years of dating and two years of marriage, you've started to take jabs at the amount of guys I've slept with. I fucking hate you for that. It's really not fair. Doesn't stop me from loving you because I think you're feeling insecure about our postmarried kind of boring sex life, but it still pisses me off. Don't throw that shit in my face.


Confession #237

Yes, I have a cocktail in my hand. Again. For the third night this week. I am the sole caregiver for our young children. The fact that I have a cocktail in my hand 2-3 nights a week...the moment you walk in the door? Ought to be a given!

The fact that I don't wake up in the morning, roll out of bed and immediately pour myself a martini? Well, that is more of a miracle than the Virgin Mary!

Confession #238

You think I'm the perfect wife. You think I enjoy cuddling with you. You have no idea that I'm in love with a woman and have learned why I was never comfortable with the physical part of our relationship.


Confession #239

I'm having a hard time remembering why we got married in the first place, the level of resentment that I feel on almost a daily basis is really starting to "taint" my outlook. I'm tired of coming to you and asking, begging, pleading, yelling, seducing, talking to you about the same thing over and over. I've tried every tactic and it's always the same, I get nothing. How can you expect me to not feel this way when day after day you come home from work and leave it all up to me??? You work late, come home, eat your dinner and spend a lot of your free time on the computer. Do you not realize how shitty I feel when I tell you that I feel lonely and that I need you? Do you not realize how angry it makes me??? Do you not realize that you are supposed to be the 'man of the house' and you need to step it up and HELP ME???? I don't think I can lower my expectations anymore than they already are. This is not the kind of relationship I wanted and it makes me sad.


Confession #240

You made me stop drinking, when you are the one with the outrageous drinking problem. It is so bad, I can't even drink wine with my dinner. When I tell you I'm going to my mothers house for the weekend to help her out, I'm really checked into a hotel drinking all weekend with my girlfriends, and you are the one footing the bill.

True Wife Confessions 307

Confession #3071

You have a cold. You are not going to die (unless I strangle you for being such a punk when you have a cold).

Confession #3072

You heard her vomiting, so your fake "I didn't hear it cause I was asleep and thought it was a dream" thing is NOT working. I was not a happy parent to have to deal with the vomitfest alone.

Confession #3073

I found out your gift to me this Christmas only cost $29.00 and then you said you had a $10 rebate to mail in. So you only spent $19 on me?? I am not materialistic and would be perfectly satisfied with this until I saw your other gifts to your mother and son. You spent well over $300! WTF? Am I not worth more than that? After all I do for you? I regret spending so much on you and wish I could take it all back. This is just icing on the cake compared to the other things you have done the last few months. Apparently the only people you aim to please is your immediate family that obviously I am not part of. And by the way, those gift cards you received for those restaurants. God forbid you take me out to a nice dinner. In fact go ahead and spend them with your buddies drinking at lunch.....Things are about to change drastically between us. You're such an asshole!

Confession #3074

im sick and tired of your whining and 'me me me' attitude. u sound just like a four year old and its getting on my nerves. im not sure if i even love you anymore! u rarely act like a man! the only time u did act like one was when i ended up in hospital NEARLY DEAD. that was the only time in nearly two years. why? why do you make commitments and promises and tell me that you'll grow up and u don't even TRY to keep them?!
i cant even talk to you about my problems or my day anymore because all you want to do is talk about YOURSELF and YOUR work and YOUR insecurities and YOUR problems! dont i exist? if i even try to approach you about this fucked up attitude of yours you just start crying even if we have a small fight! i dont even cry as much as you do! im a woman! u cry more then a girl! why do you do this to me? you've shattered all of my self esteem just because you havent got any or at least pretend you don't, you just lean on me for everything and i cant even TALK to you about my problems because u start talking about yourself and how much u dont like your workplace and how much u dont feel like going to work and how much u dont know how u can have more self confidence.. well even i have got my own problems mister. grow up! u say u cant have a normal self esteem.. why? i have a normal one and i had a hard and abusive childhood and u've had a perfect one and claim u havent got any self esteem?!
i dread the days when im going to see u because everytime i say a tiny bit about myself u start huffing and puffing because u say that all i talk about is my hair and make up and my friends. what do you want me to talk about?? how great u are? you sometimes ask me why i dont open up that much to you nowadays! its obvious why i dont open up to you! u're the most self-centered person i know and yet you claim that you're not! what do YOU want from me?!

and yet everytime i feel like i want to leave u, something happens and i get all stiff because i dont know how i can do it, uve done soo much for me and i know u love me! u treat me like a princess and try all that u can to cheer me up and make me happy whenever something goes wrong or i've had a bad day and i feel so obligated towards you! yet you always manage to get me wrong and now im so confused i feel like crying every time i talk to youand although sometimes i feel like i want to leave you, other times i feel like i cant be without you and yet when you do all those fucked up things u seem to love to do, i feel like i resent you and i dont want to be with you and i want everything to come back the way it was when we were still friends and u were always doped up on everything u laid hands on and i was always running around with my best friends and do whatever i wanted to do with them because i love them so much and i love u too but i cant do stuff i want to do with you sometimes! i cant even get slightly tipsy or drunk when im with you because u start acting like some sour puss even when your friends talk to me u seem like u get jealous and everything even if a guy talks to me u seem like u want to break his nose! u know i hate that you make me feel incompetent and unable to do stuff by myself! now because of your fucked up attitude im starting to like someone else and i REALLY like him i look foreward to talk to him and everything even though i know i shouldnt feel this way but i cant help it :s u really make me feel like im locked up in a room where i cant express myself or anything! i dont even THINK about telling u all this because if i do, im sure u'd misunderstand me like u do all the time when i try to tell you and ull start crying and telling me its not ur fault and you'd blame everything around u and even myself and u wouldnt even let me finish ONE sentence! i really want to show u this but i cant.. im even feeling tired every time i talk to you and i feel like im really doing a huge effort even by answering the phone every time u call me because ur so fucking insecure that u ask me all kinds of questions from WHAT ARE YOU DOING WHY DIDNT YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?! to am i bothering you? or even 'am i doing good? am i man enough now?

yes sometimes you do bother me! i've got so much to tell u and u dont even let me say a single word and then u make me feel really guilty because u start crying and whimpering and saying its all your fault and when u do that u make me feel soo frustrated i feel like i cant even talk about my feelings and i have to do everything to please you..

oh and dont get me started by the sex and how good it was at first and how now i dread it and prefer masturbating more then doing it with you..

Confession #3075


Why is it that you can NEVER let me be my own person. You said that you would change and I could start to have my own friends...But then you go back to your old ways..i thought you learned when i went away that I could do this without you..And you what, you just should me that you will never change...FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU...

I was so much happier when i was away, I was me..Do you really care to really get to know me and who I really am...

Maybe if I am really gone from here and there is no way that you can ever hurt me again...would you even care..i doubt you will give a shit if i didn't wake up tomorrow.

But I promised a very special person in my life that i would never leave him or my girls to deal with that kind of pain..

Confession #3076

I don't like taking care of you. You are worse than any child. I thought marriage would be a team effort at raising children, taking care of a home, etc. You however, seem to think we are all in servitude to you. That if you just "show up" you are contributing. That communicating means being under the same roof. You think sitting in the same room gets you brownie points. That coming home at 7:00 from the gym each night to have a meal with you wife in kids in your sweaty gym clothes is a sacrifce. Your youngest goes to bed at 8:30. How can you really get to know her, you eat, you shower, you plant your butt in front of the TV night after night. Sometimes you make it to bed and sometimes you don't. You can't talk about anything interesting, you only talk about you and your work.

What happened to the guy that I dated. We danced, we traveled, we went to movies, we took the kids to the park, on so on and so on. We talked on the phone for hours when we were dating, now a grunt or a work rant is the extent of our dialogue.

Oh, I know. You got everything you wanted. Custody of your daughter, me, a new house, a new job, and a new baby. Well, you are gonna lose it all. You have already lost your oldest daughter. You are too interested in yourself and your needs to see that you are losing the people around you.

Your mood swings suck! You have more PMS than I do. Your either totally checked out and wrapped up in your own thoughts or you are ranting because everything didn't go your way. You say you are "self contained" I say you are selfish.

You don't help around the house. You resent doing anything in the yard.. You are boring. You let your own 2 year old grab "big girl" scissors and sit right beside you while I am getting groceries.........you are so involved with your precious TV you dont' even notice. Christ. How did your first daughter survive you????

Checked out. Now it's my turn. Focus on your family, focus on your marriage. Get out of your own head! PS- let's have sex sometime other than midnight. PSS- let it last more than 3-5 minutes! What did you use up all your energy at the gym and all of your creativity at work????

ARRRGGGHHH! The next ten years are mine :-) Pay attention. Change is in your future.

Confession #3077

My father died nine years ago, but this morning I had such a vivid dream that he was standing next to me in my old house. He was giving me comfort because I was frustrated about the piles of clutter, worn-out junk, and garbage everywhere because I'm very proud of keeping a very tidy house. He kissed me on the top of the head, gave me a shoulder-to-shoulder hug, and said, "It's just a phase. This too, shall pass." I woke up smiling because he used to say that phrase every time I realized I had to break up with some immature jerk of a boyfriend that was using me, was using drugs, was unreliable, or was just generally no good.

Seconds after I got up to let the dogs out, I heard you stomping around and acting like a little child because you couldn't get my truck to start. You wrecked your car last week, and you keep changing the blame among icy conditions,the quality of your tires, and the unpredictability of front-wheel drive cars. (You could have slowed down on the slick roads, you had the money to buy tires but chose to save it instead, and I managed to get my front-wheel drive car four times the distance without incident by driving cautiously.) I went back out into the storm and spent two hours waiting with you for the tow truck to take the car to a mechanic. I even bought you dinner afterwards. I don't want to be your chauffer until it's fixed, so I let you borrow my truck this morning. It's not as fancy as the classic car you have sitting in the garage or the other classic car you're having rebuilt, but it runs and has good tires. My truck ran just fine yesterday when it got an oil change and clean bill of health from the mechanic, and it started just fine when I went out there in my pajamas to give it a try this morning. Instead of admitting you're an idiot, you continued to shout and act as if your problems were somehow my fault. Not only are your problems not my fault, there isn't a single one of them I haven't helped you deal with. The fact that you would stand there taking your frustrations out on me moments after I'd gotten out of bed is a real eye opener about your maturity, your character, your gratitude for the generosity of the people in your life, your ability to plan and solve problems, and further proof that you're not right for me. You want to shout? Bring it on, my daddy didn't raise a door mat. You're lucky I decided not to kick you to the curb today. I'm not doing a damn thing for you until you apologize and sound like you mean it. Let's see what a few weeks of riding the bus does to your attitude.

Confession #3078

I know what I’m doing is wrong and that I’ve finally turned into a “statistic” but I feel like I can’t help myself. I’m your average, middle class, married working woman, two kids, nice house, church going, supportive family. Everything that should make me a “good” person. Here I am in the midst of a tumultuous affair with my next-door neighborhood.



We started as neighbors, friends. A little banter here, a little banter there. Suddenly I was in a whirlwind of having a crush. It was fun, harmless I told myself. Then that fateful night came. A neighborhood party. We hung out for hours, totally PG flirting. HE confessed HE wasn’t happily married. I could feel the tension between us. The interest. The desire. A few days later, a rare warm late fall day we got to be outside for hours with the kids. Flirting was rampant though kept in check due to the presence of both our spouses. In an opportune moment, HE leaned over and whispered HIS email address to me and asked me to email HIM the next day.



Our email exchange was/is ridiculous. Sometimes as many as 50 emails back and forth a day. Pushing for more information, teasing, flirting, challenging me. I had the opportunity to be home early one day and let HIM know. HE came over to “talk.” I was a nervous schoolgirl. Couldn’t hardly look HIM in the eye. Things got close, intense. HE said I had to make the first move; I started to and then hesitated. He pulled back. A moment later, HE dove in. The most amazing kissing of my life. All the while, I was thinking, “I am breaking my marriage vows right here in my own kitchen with my next door neighbor. Seriously? This is my life?”



More phone calls and emails. Such chemistry. A few days later things progressed. I stopped just in the nick of time. Who am I doing this? On my own couch with my own neighbor? More days passed. Hundreds of emails, more than a few phone calls. We started having sex on a fairly regular basis.



Almost three months later, I’m obsessed, wrapped up in a web of mixed emotions. I long to be with him but know it’s virtually impossible. Relationship with husband is seriously on the rocks and essentially over. All that’s left is for me to tell him it’s officially over. Know I’m hurting him but feel like I can’t imagine a life with us together ever again. As much as I try not to think of a “future” with HIM, it’s getting harder by the day.


We avoid talking about feelings other than to tease each other. We both have said we’re crazy for each other. My marriage is/will be ending soon. Not so sure about his. Life is complicated. Now the question is, will I be happy being the other woman in his life if he decides he can’t leave yet?

Confession #3079

I sleep terribly when you are away on business.

Confession #3080

Dear Friend,

We have known each other for 10 years now. When we met, I was married. I knew you were attracted to me because I was the first woman you approached that night. I know I was the first because I noticed you when you walked in the door. We talked for a half an hour, just about random things before it came up I was married. You immediately got up to pursue other interests.
It is good that you did. I never cheated on my husband, nor was I ever tempted. But after getting to know you over the years, in every way, you could have been the one to tempt me. Thank you for not tempting me. Instead, you end up with my best friend. Whew, I thought that was great. You would be a good friend and had a good woman and it was how it was supposed to be.
Fast forward 2 years. Here I am going through a divorce and quite confused about it. I never had second thoughts about you, but you were a dear friend to me during that time. You gave me a male perspective when all I had were my female friends' thoughts and advice. The three of us became fast friends. It was alway the three of us.
I remember the first night you approached me. The three of us went out; you, me and your girlfriend, who was my best friend. I remember feeling low about my self for some time and got dressed up that night. You immediately took notice and complimented me. I didn't think anything of it; just a nice compliment from a friend. We went to a couple of bars before finding one and staying there for the evening. We were all having a great time drinking and dancing. I remember needing to take a break so I sat down at our table. She stayed up on the dance floor and you came to join me soon after. We were just randomly talking for a while and then you said it.
You told me how attracted to me you were. How you always had been. Then you told me how you thought about contacting me while she was out of town because you found a scrap of paper with my number written on it. I asked why you didn't and you had said you weren't sure how I would react. I at that moment still was unsure of how to react. When I did react, well we know what happened.
Somewhere between the alchohol, the sexual tension between us and the knowledge that I could take something away from the "perfect" best friend, we ended up outside behind the bar completely engrossed in each other's lips.
That in itself was wrong. We were almost caught right then and there. We should have credited it to a drunken mistake. Are either of us that easily right minded and strong willed? No, we had too much chemistry and curiosity to stop there. We managed to figure out that we would leave my car at the bar and I would go to you and her's place because I was too drunk to drive, then you would take me to get my car in the morning on your way to work. We tried that night when she passed out, but we were too paranoid and felt too guilty. Again, we should have left it at that. Not us!
We had an awkward ride to my car. Very quiet and reflective of what happened or didn't happen the night before. When we reached my car, that elephant that was sitting in the backseat piped up. You asked if we should or were going to continue with the events of the previous night. I should have said no. I could have said no. I said to follow me home.
We proceeded to have AMAZING sex. So amazing that we are still having it 8 years later! We should have never started, considering the circumstances. But we did, and I have enjoyed every minute of it.
Yes, there were several years that we did not see each other. We would talk occasionally, to keep up. But I was around when you first met your wife, and continued to be around well into your courtship. We only played once while you were actually married, and only because I was broken up with the man I spent 5 years with. Why was it ok with me for you to be the cheater but not me? I will never know the answer to that.
We then move forward to this past summer. You called me out of the blue and told me you were getting divorced. I know it crushed you and you needed a friend. Not just sexually, but just someone to be there. I was dealing wiht the realization that the last break-up with him of 5 years was just that; the LAST break-up because it was really over. So in the last 10 years, we have both walked each other through a divorce and a break-up or two.
Of course we started sleeping together. That is what we do. We are too attracted to eache other and have amazing sex and neither of us has to put another notch in the belt or try to invest in something new. We started off by getting together once, maybe twice a week. Then one night you asked me to stay. We had never spent the night together. You held me all night. I liked it.
I liked it because it was comfortable. It was nice to be held. You feel the same. We started spending every night that neither of us had our kids together. It would progress to 4-5 days a week. We got into very heavy conversation. There "I love you's" thrown out. There were all the "what might have beens". Then you got to the "Who cares if she finds out? It's been so long". We do love each other, I think more than each of us will admit, but we can't be together. And that is all on me.
I am not willing to give up that friendship and many other friendships that will sever if the truth of us ever came out. I wish I could, but I can't. You make me laugh. We can talk about anything. We can be silly. We dance. We are too much alike. We better each other. But it can't happen and we both agree on it.
So if we both agree on that, and we both like spending this time with each other, are we hurting or helping each other? I think it's both. You do too. We have both said that it will break both of our hearts the day one of us walks away due to finding someone else we can be with. But I am not actively pursuing that avenue. The main reason is that I don't want to find someone I actually like and have to give you up. You are comfort to me.
For that reason, I said we should slow down. I am getting too attached. You agreed. But we also agreed to get through the holidays because no one wants to be alone. We made it through Thanksgiving. Now let's get through the New Year and see where we are.
I love you and I know you love me. Whether we are in love, I don't know and don't think that we would ever admit it if we were. But I do know that I have become a better person because of you. You made me believe that I am good enough. Even when I am not feeling like I am. I know I have helped you get to a better place as well.
No matter what happens, we know that we will always be the best of friends and we will have each other in our lives for the rest of them. I love you friend.
Let's dance tonight!

True Wife Confessions 23 Mathematical problems of David Hilbert

Confession #221

You are not my husband. I think you were supposed to be, though. The more I desire you, the more I think about luring you from your wife and family, the more you resist. I find that to be wildly attractive and loyal because I know you want to as much as I do. If you had just slept with me, I would have left you behind. Your committment to them makes me love you more. I will wait for you as long as I need to.

Confession #222

I pretend to like that we were romantic and eloped out of the blue, but I resent that you didn't get me an engagement ring.

Confession #223

Honey, when you are heading to bed late at night, how many times do I
have to tell you to leave the door to the bathroom open so that the
cats can get to the litter box? And if you do shut the door, don't
bitch the next morning if the cat has taken a shit on the carpet.
when you gotta go... you gotta go!!! and then telling me to clean it
up because it "my cat"? you're lucky I don't put the shit in your
loafers you bastard.

Confession #224

I LOVE it when you have to go on business trips
because that's when I throw away all your crappy
stupid possessions that you insist on hanging on to --
despite that fact that I'm required to maintain them,
clean them and step over them in our teeny tiny house.
You want to know where all your junk went? Goodwill,
baby! Goodwill.

Confession #225

I hate that you drink so much. Watching it makes me sick. While I recognize it's YOUR problem, it is sucking the life out of me. With every drink you take, I fall more out of love with you. Just because you can get up and go to work doesn't mean I don't see it for the problem it is.
I am starting to hate you.


Confession #226

I am no longer with you out of love, respect, admiration, or even friendship. I only stay with you out of a sense of obligation. I no longer daydream of making love to you on the beach. Now, I daydream about you telling me you have found someone else and you are moving out. That dream makes me giddy with happiness.

Confession #227

I don't trust you.
And you don't care.

Confession #228

When I ask you to do something please, no wait strike the please... JUST DO IT. I'm not your housekeeper, laundry washer, and personal chef. When I have to ask you 2 or 3 times and I get that stupid salute you think is funny I want to kick you in your ONE BALL.

Confession #229

Sometimes I am in awe of how dumb you are....I can't believe you did
not pay the gas bill because you thought it was on automatic draft and
now dumbfuck...we have no gas!!!! You can run an entire empire, but
can't fucking pay the damn gas bill.

I SHOULD LEAVE YOU RIGHT NOW

Confession #230

I honestly think that if I asked you to choose between me and the TV and computer games, you'd choose the TV and computer games.

True Wife Confessions 306 icicles on the eaves

Confession #3061

I confess. I knew all along that you were still active on the online dating sites. I just didn't know that you were exchanging nude pics with those women until I happened to walk in on you using the computer a few days ago.

I'm stunned that you chose to continue the picture exchange rather than continuing our relationship. After being in a relationship with you for 2 years, I thought I knew you better than that. I was wrong.

Confession #3062


I don't know what to do with you these days? The last month of my life has been thrown in such turmoil I don't even know now I feel about you anymore. Was I ever really in love with you or did I get swept away in my "grand plan" of life. Now here we are 12 years later, and I find my world turned upside down and another man involved. Never thought my life would be like this. How to decide what to do now? You know I'm not happy and that I feel like we are very far apart emotionally. I know you want to try to get "us" back. I just don't know if I have the energy or the will. Maybe I'm just done.

Confession #3063

We have been together a very long time. I fall out of love with you, but I stay. Then sometimes you do something sweet or thoughtful. Maybe you just touch me or ask me to watch a movie with you. And I remember why I fell in love with you. But it never lasts long enough to cement it all back together.


Confession #3064

I don’t understand how you can be loyal to everyone but me. You don’t even care how I feel about anything. I don’t know why I stay some days. You make it easier and easier for me to want to leave. The reason I don’t is because I took vows. I stood before God and promised so many things. I will not let these things that you do get me down because you are an idiot. So much for thinking you were my best friend.

Confession #3065

I wish your bloody mother would learn to spell my name right. We've been together for nearly TEN YEARS, and she still can't. It isn't that complicated a name!

Confession #3066

I miss you. I miss our friendship. I miss seeing you and laughing and smiling. I want to rekindle that, but I can't get over the hurtful things you said to me. I've heard that you are feeling the same, but that you don't want to make the first move. Why does it always have to be me that initiates the make-up work? Why is it so hard for you to just admit that you did something wrong and then apologize for it? You're immature. If you were to come to me with a humble heart I would take you in my arms and forgive you. This needs to start with you. I've already made my apologies. I'm still so sad and humiliated by what you said and did. If we talk it out, things may not be the same but we could at least start fresh. Don't wait. Just come to me. I'm gonna let you know how I feel, but I won't bite your head off.


Confession #3067

I'm glad you found that $14,000 check you lost. I suggested that you use it to take care of your tax situation and you got mad. "It's your money," I said. "Then act like it," you said. I really don't give a shit, because I have an innocent spouse waiver and I am not responsible for your tax debt since it was created before I even met you. We've been together for four years and married for six months. If it was me who had a check for that amount I would discuss with you what we should do with it. Like fix up our shitty little house, which is in sore need of major repairs. Or pay off your medical bills. Or buy some new clothes for our toddler and fix up her room. Or add another room onto our house so I'll have a place to put a washer/dryer rather than lugging piles of dirty laundry to the laundromat every weekend. But I suggested you use it to take care of YOUR fucked up situation that YOU created. I wouldn't get a penny out of it, so why would you get pissed about that, you retard? I love you, but you are such a freaking procrastinator. You work hard at your job, but you spend every Friday night getting smashed, and then it takes you the rest of the weekend to sleep it off. Any other time is spent sitting on the couch watching football. I have to shoulder all of the responsibilities - cooking, cleaning, taking care of our daughter, errands..... and that's on top of my full-time manual job. I wish you would get it together. Stopping the Friday night binge drinking would be a good start. Spending a little time working around the house and doing fun stuff with me and our girl would be great too. Sometimes you really remind me of my father - lazy, indifferent, and stubborn. And I still resent him.

Confession #3068

Well, I thought moving and getting you out of the element you couldn't stand would make things better. You are closer to home now, and you are still miserable. Your temper is very scary. Now we have your son in anger management. WTF will it take for you to grow the f up? I don't want to be afraid of what might happen anymore. You don't want to hear it. OMG I can't even talk right now, now I am getting all mixed up in my head.

Confession #3069

I fell in love with you, again, last night.

After 11 years married, 12 years together, I can still find myself weak in the knees, head spinning, breath taken away in love with you.

Oh, sure, it doesn't happen every time we're together anymore. Our daily lives can't stop in orbit around each other, we'd never grow together if we did that. And, it's seeing you in the world, in our lives, in the challenges we face together, the laughs we share, that leaves me feeling more sure that this is where I want my life to be every day, while also leaving me in awe that I somehow ended up here with you.

But, I hope that you know all of that. I hope that I say it out loud and show it often as we move through our days together.

Last night, though, was one of those heart stopping, deep sigh moments. While we were alone, enjoying our 'grown-up' time after the kids were asleep, I did something that I don't remember doing before. I left my eyes open the whole time (well, most of it) and watched you as we were making love, as you made love to me. Now, I don't want you thinking that I didn't look before because I didn't want to. It's not that at all. I'm sure it's a combination of latent catholic guilt & childish 'close your eyes while you're kissing' romanticism, along with my own insecurities about my body & general shyness. Anyway, I overcame that for a while last night & really watched you as we came together. And, sure, it was hot. But, more than that, it was beautiful. I was overwhelmed with love for *you* and our lives together.

I love that, after all this time, I still find our love new & wonderful & the luckiest thing to ever happen to me. I know that I will be falling in love with you again, in new ways, for the rest of my life.

And, I hope that you know that you can confidently trade toothbrushes with me any time at all. As Howard Jones said, "Can anybody love anyone so much that they will never fear, never worry, never be sad? The answer is they cannot love this much. Nobody can. That is why I don't mind you doubting" I am what I love, not what loves me. I love you.

Confession #3070

We are getting divorced and it is the best thing for both of us. I told myself I would wait until it was official before I slept with him but the opportunity presented itself and we took it....and I don't feel the least bit guilty. He was FANTASTIC!!! As good as I was hoping he would be he was ten times better. I would gladly trade the one night of mind-blowing sex I had with him (although it won't be our last) for the nine years of infrequent, perfunctory, boring intercourse we had. Even though I have technically committed adultery (something I have never done before) I am down on my knees thanking whatever Gods there may be for feeling this way again.

We had been waiting patiently for months and since you and I are still under the same roof I have been respectful, only talking to him in my room with the door closed or when you aren't in the house. I will continue to be respectful but I am not giving him up. Even though he is still married too, and I have NO long term expectations from him, we are going to keep seeing each other as friends and lovers for as long as we both can take it.

He has re-awakened the passion in me, inspired me to start writing again (something you never knew I did) and encourages my endeavors. He looks at me with longing and desire, shows me kindness, consideration and respect and is willing to listen whenever I need a sympathetic ear. You haven't done any of those things since we were first married nine years ago. He can't understand why any man would be willing to give me up; you couldn't care less about keeping me around.

I'm glad our divorce is proceeding amicably and I will certainly strive to keep it that way but if we should happen to slip up and you find out about him then you will just have to deal with it. If you want to take a lover by all means...feel free!!! I wish you nothing but the best and want you to be happy, although your complete and utter lack of interest in the bedroom these past few years makes me think that sex is not foremost on your mind.

I am so incredibly thankful that I remember what it feels like to be appreciated and desired I can't even begin to describe it!!! If (God forbid) I should never see him again, I will still be eternally grateful that he has reminded me of my own self-worth and reminded me what it feels like to experience passion again. Being married to you, I had almost forgotten what it was like. I won't forget again.

True Wife Confessions Catch 22

Confession #211

You were such a jerk, and you made me so angry and miserable in the days leading up to our wedding day, and on the day itself, that I almost didn't go through with our wedding. I wouldn't have done it if I hadn't been knocked up already. I spent the entire day of our wedding terrified that I was making the worst mistake of my life, wanting to vomit, forcing myself to smile. I already wanted to divorce you before we even got home from the marriage license office. Thankfully it wasn't a mistake to marry you; I loved you then, and I love you now, and our marriage has actually turned out very well. But this is why I never want to do anything on our anniversary-- I don't even want to think about that day; it was one of the worst days of my life. I wish I could erase the memory from my mind.


Confession #212

We've been together for 12 years. After 10 years of finding a new roll of toilet paper precariously balanced on top of the empty cardboard roll, I decided we did not need toilet paper holders anymore. I didn't do it because I wanted to keep up with the trends. You can be a real jerk sometimes.

Confession #213

I do ALL of the work inside of the house, ALL of the yard work, ALL of the dog's duties, AND I work 40+ per week. I shoot daggers at you every weekend while you sleep in until 10am then get up and surf Myspace for 2 hours until lunch.

Confession #214

You CAN'T take credit for housework when you make the kids do it.

Confession #215

How is it that even when you do something as menial as boil water on the stove, you manage to use EVERY pot and pan that we own?? I swear, you went in to make a sandwich, and the kitchen is now a disaster area.

Confession #216

I have been married to you for 12 years and have loved you for 3 of them. I am only staying married to you for our child who adores you. I find you ignorant, slow, and you can't read very well either.

Confession #217

You're not fooling me with your "dumb male" act. You're an intelligent man-- you're easily as smart as I am, and I know with absolute certainty that after three years of living with me you are in fact capable of remembering where in my dresser I keep my pajamas and socks. So stop leaving them stacked on the bed when you fold the laundry, as if you have no idea where they go. Ditto the serving dishes you ALWAYS leave stacked on the counter when you unload the dishwasher. I've been keeping that ceramic platter, that cut glass bowl that chip-and-dip set in exactly the same cabinet for a year and a half now, and it would take you no more than two seconds to put them away. And don't even get me started on your spurious claim that you can't ever find the paper towels when it's time to replace an empty roll. There are ALWAYS paper towels in the linen closet, and they are always on the same shelf, right below the shelf where you keep extra bottles of your shaving cream and shampoo.

Confession #218


Why do I have to remind YOU to call the dealer to make an oil change appointment on the new PT Cruiser you wanted more than anything?

Confession #219

Honey, I love you - I really do - but the fact that you can not do anything like RSVP for any child's birthday party or invitation to play galls me. Regardless of how well you know the other family, you make me handle all the details. For such a liberated man, this is one bizarre throwback trait.

Confession #220

wish that for every hour your spent on your computer you'd spend 20 minutes with me. We used to talk to each other for hours. And I miss that.