Friday, March 09, 2007

True Wife Confessions 166 sips of a very hot beverage

Confession #1651

I saw a couple looking longingly/lovingly into each other's eyes and it made me feel very sad, as you have never looked lovingly into my eyes and never will. You don't even act like you like me, much less love me. How many time do I need to tell you what I need from you and what our kids need from you? I can't spell it out any simpler and it's pissing me off that you act like you really care but then, do nothing. Nada. I'm tired of talking to you and you doing nothing.

Why am I never in the mood? What have you done to make me be in the mood? Do you act like you think I'm sexy/pretty/funny/anything other than just the maid? Do you pay me compliments? Do anything sweet, just because? Touch me other than when you want to get laid? I can be in the mood ALL THE TIME and you know that, as evidenced by before. But, if you don't do anything to make me get in the mood (other than jumping me when I get into bed) it won't happen or at least not often.

I don't have any idea what goes on in your head. I know you love me but you never show it and it's sad. Your kids love you and just want time with you, want to do things with you and you don't and won't. Sitting in front of the TV/computer in the family room DOES not count as spending time with your family. Work is more important, everything is more important to you and your family comes in last. Sad.

Confession #1652

When I found out that you're doing to your new wife the exact same thing
you did to me, I secretly smiled. She deserves you. I deserve better.

Confession #1653

I hate the fucking dogs so much that I'm actually contemplating cancelling the wedding and leaving you. I know it was my idea to get them in the first place, but I had no idea they would be soul sucking hounds of hell. It is NOT okay for them to be on the brand new leather sofa after chewing the shit out of the old one. Having to replace all carpets, lino and hardwood because of them chewing is NOT normal. Get your head out of your ass and get rid of them, or you'll be rid of me.

Confession #1654

Dear husband,

Do you realize that throughout our entire evening tonight (through dinner, dessert and a nice walk) you talked of nothing but yourself? You didn’t ask me one question. Instead you yammered on and on about what you said to the underling you lunched with today. What kinds of sexy outfits the waitresses were wearing. And what you said to your superiors. And then you talked about your presentation prowess. And how everyone LOVES you at work. And how you motivate and inspire your underlings. Gag. Corporate America is comprised of a bunch of men (and even women) in a continuous pissing contest. Don’t whip that dick out and try to act like yours is the biggest one in the room just yet. Because it ain’t. I’m curious of what your employees REALLY think of you. But even if they DO like you, they’ll soon see what I do: you’re all talk and no action.

You definitely have a talent for sizing someone up in the first few minutes of meeting them then figuring out what sweet words they want to hear and then charming the pants off of them. According to you, everyone is eating out of the palm of your hand… Yeah. I’ll bet.

But anyway… It would have been nice if you would have asked (in our four hour date) how my day was. Or even said, “You look nice tonight.” Or “Thanks for taking care of me while I was sick this week.” And when we finally got off the corporate crap, you droned on and on about other things… You seem to think you’re an expert on almost everything. You seem to think I care. What I hear is what you don’t say – that you are awfully fond of hearing your own damn voice. And I honestly think that it didn’t matter if I was there or not. I could have put a woman who doesn’t speak English in front of you, or even placed a blow-up doll in my seat and you would have still had a good time. Probably because you were talking about your most favorite subject in the whole wide world. YOURSELF.

Oh and another thing? It REALLY pisses me off when I’m sicker than a dog and you tell me “Well, looks like you’re gonna just have to “suck it up”. But at the same time, you take a day and a half off of work, sit on the couch all day watching movies when you get the sniffles. And you can’t seem to be bothered with cleaning up your own tissues, picking up your damn snack wrappers or even helping with our child.

I hope you aren’t expecting sex tonight. The last thing I want to do is have sex with you. But then again, maybe I shouldn’t worry. You’ve got a hand – you can have sex with the one person you care about, think about, and love more than anything in this world – YOURSELF.


Confession #1655

We're going into week two of not talking, not acknowledging one anothers existence. I come home, you go in the bedroom and remain there until you leave for work the next morning. MAN I LOVE IT! It's like I'm free - free from you and your sarcasm, your arrogance and ignorance, I FREAKING LOVE IT. Just me and my kids, which is exactly how I want it to be. Thanks for giving me this little taste of freedom, it only proves (to me) that I want out; I want to get as far away from you as I possibly can. Later asshole!

Confession #1656

You've been moved out again, for the third time in a year, for 2 weeks this time, back at your (married) mistress of 7 years' house.

I'm so sorry I called you this morning. It's obvious (now) that I'm not going to get a kind word from you anymore. I have to say right from the top that your "you drove me away" comment came straight from that whore's mouth. That's what the cheatin' bitch said to me last summer. So, Mack, you can continue to believe that everything is all MY fault. That YOU were a complete innocent and the perfect husband....whatever allows you to look at yourself in the mirror. "Perfect" husbands' wives don't feel rejected and lonely when their husbands are at home....and their bones and their hearts don't break on their own. As far as the financial commitment to the house is concerned, you can simply leave me a message at home, during the day, while I'm at work, so we don't have to "speak" to each other, regarding the amount you deposited. I see no need to talk to each other. If anyone is pushing anyone away, it's you. As much as I THINK miss you, I have to honestly ask myself "what" I miss. Do I miss hearing about how everything I do or say has a surreptitious motive? No (that's your whore over there....just wait, you'll see). Do I miss hearing you berate me and my intentions EVERY TIME I talk to you? No. Do I miss being ignored when you come to bed and having you completely ignore or angrily dismiss me for days at a time? No. Do I miss that whore's smell in my house every day? No. You know, you actually had me believing for years that everything is all my fault. What a number you did on my psyche. The only thing I'm guilty of is loving you more than I loved myself. Therein lies the BIGGEST mistake of all. "They" say you teach people how to treat you and somewhere along the line I taught you that it is ok to ignore me, belittle me, reject me and, in general, make me feel like I wasn't worthy of love. In the end, you'll be the one who's sorry.

Oh yeah....guess what.....
(her phone number)
How stupid do you think I am! Told you YEARS ago....I'm incredibly resourceful.

Confession #1657

I don't think I can hold it all in anymore. You went after my dad and are still trying to ruin my parents marriage. Then you called me a "spoiled little bitch" and I'm still confused as to why. If you think that of me, at least you have one thing right. I am a bitch. I'm proud to be the very strong, independent women I worked very hard to become after my first marriage. He abused me in ways you wouldn't understand. You don't understand anything unless it puts you the center of attention. PLEASE stop asking my mother about my pregnancy. It makes me want to drive the 16 hour trip just to bitch slap you. The only reason you ask is so you look like you care. Please do not send anything for my baby when my family comes to visit. I will mail you the ashes after I burn the stuff. I don't need your bad karma all over my life. You do enough to my mother on a daily basis. DO NOT give me parenting advice. Your 9 year old told you to go f*ck yourself! Your 6 year old is mental and beats his head on the walls until he's black and blue. Yeah, you raised some winners. MOTHER OF THE YEAR RIGHT THERE!!! If my dad is screwing you, it better be a good piece of ass because when my mother takes the house and half his retirement, I'm sure he won't look so great to your slut-bag whore self anymore. Please just stay away from me and don't think about me. I don't wish any evil on you. Seems that karma has a way of knowing who to bless and who to curse.

Confession #1658

You know, when you and I first started going out, I knew you lived with another woman. I didn't care. I didn't care at all. Matter of fact, I hated her even though I didn't know her and relished in the knowledge that when you were with me, she was most likely at home upset because she didn't know where you were or who you were with.

the BEST was when you'd spend the night! I bet she hated that, didn't she?

You and I are finally together- she finally left you alone- and now, I find her shoes.

You leave, I don't know where you are. I go through your phone and find that you still text and call HER.

You tell me that I didn't mind how you were when you were with HER, so how I can I mind now? You are who you are.

Now I'm stuck. I'm in this "relationship" with someone I should have never gotten with in the first place. I can't leave because I can't afford to. I know that you'll never stop what you do. I truly believed that you would for me, but I've found that you won't- for anyone.

I thought I won.

But I don't think I did.

Confession #1659

OUR SEX SUCKS. That felt so good to say. You would die if I said
this to you, but how can you not know? You're there for crying out
loud. You're having the same experience I am, except you actually
get satisfaction after a couple minutes. It's lame. But you go on
about how "that was great" and "wow, I can't move". You're bad at
it, and you always have been. It's just gotten so much worse.
Before you were bad, but if I worked at it, I could get it spiced up-
and you loved it! But with two kids in less than two years, I don't
always have the energy to add all the spice, nor am I motivated to.
You are just bad at it. Is there a book you can read, or maybe I'll
draw you a map, but it's not like you will pay attention to it,
because I have told you several things you do that turn me off and
several things you could do instead and you have yet to follow those
instructions. At this point, I feel like just laying there every
single time until you say something. At least that will make you
notice how utterly unenjoyable it is for me. Our marriage is a happy
one otherwise and I am afraid to cutoff the sex as I have heard that
sex is only 10% of a marriage when you're having it, but if you're
not having it, it's 90% because there are other problems preventing
you (financial, abuse, disconnect, etc, etc) We don't have those -
luckily- but we do have one problem, you're bad at it! But, just so
this is not all negative, I will say you are well endowed and could
recover nicely if I could just get through to you with some damn

Confession #1660

you are a damn near perfect husband except when it comes to dealing with you ex-girlfriend (of whom which you have a beautiful daughter with). i feel like you try to protect her from me, like i am sort of a bully. i am very proud of myself for standing up to her ONE TIME. how did you handle that?????? we got in the biggest fight of our whole marriage.

i could totally forget about her nonsense if you handled things differently. i know this is the part where everyone is going to jump down my throat and tell me he is never going to change. you are right. so just let me bitch.........

she is a victim with out a victimizer. she views being a single mother a hardship (none of my single mom friends do!). she is always dwelling on the negative. her passive-aggressiveness is total bullshit! i love how she says she hates it when people feel sorry for her. well that is the only feelings i have for you. yes i feel sorry for you. if you do not like it get off your pity me trip and do something with your life!!!! and dear hubby, stop feeding in to this nonsense.


Anonymous said...

It's called crate training. Read about it. The destruction caused by dogs YOU wanted that YOU have failed to train is YOUR fault.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and to 1653...getting a "brand new leather sofa" when you have dogs that act like that is just plain stupid. How about you "get your head out of your ass" and take your dogs to obedience class. It's not their fault they have losers for owners.

Anonymous said...

I would agree that you should get educated ASAP about how to train those dogs, 1653, but honestly, anyone who flies that far off that handle about pets behaving like pets may not be ready to take on marriage just yet.

And if you're planning to have kids, think dogs x 1000.

Anonymous said...

1658, your entry should be required reading for all those smug folks who think the reason they could lure away a mate is because they're such irresistible sexpots. Nope... it's because the mate likes to cheat.

Sorry you're stuck with an awful guy for financial reasons, though. That blows, I've been there.

Anonymous said...

1654-You should start doing the same. Everytime he says something turn it around about your self. Oh, and next time HE's sick, tell him to 'Suck it up' back. Jerk!

1657- HU?

1659-I'm so sorry he won't listen to you. Maybe you SHOULD buy a book and read it together. I have the opposite problem, hubby is awesome, we just never do it. Makes me wonder if I'm bad.

Anonymous said...

I agree--Dogs have nothing on kids. Maybe you should rethink what you want in life!

Anonymous said...

#1653 - I'm gonna cut you a little slack. Some of us are just not dog people. Unfortunately, some people don't find it out until after they get a dog(s). The decent thing to do, for the sake of the dogs, isto suck it up until you can find a loving home for them, after all, it is not their fault but any man who is not sesitive to the fact that the dogs make you miserable is probably not one you should marry. Just don't make the mistake of thinking it is THESE dogs. Don't get any more. EVER. It will turn out the same way.

Oh, and the statement about children, ignore it. Children are harder work than dogs and can be equally destructive, but they are CHILDREN! It is different. Just because you are not a dog person does not mean you can't be a good mother. That is the most stupid thing I have ever heard. Find a new home for the dogs and if he wants to go with them, let him. The dogs would probably be happier somewhere else too.

Anonymous said...

From #1653
The dogs have both been through obedience school and are crated whenever we leave the house. The destruction comes from when my fiance refused to crate them because it was "cruel" and they would be locked in one room when left alone. These dogs are extremelly spoiled and have numerous toys and things to chew on. As one commentor said you don't realize that you aren't a dog person until it's too late sometimes. As for children, I did the responsible thing and had myself fixed so that there wouldn't be any late discoveries on how I don't like having them (my fiance doesn't want any children either). So I am not a "loser" owner, just extemely frustrated at having a couple of perpetual toddlers in my home.

Anonymous said...

#1659 - That's a tough place to be in. If he doesn't see anything wrong with your sex life then it will difficult for him to change or even think about changing. He seems to be getting pleasure (and satisfaction) and you're not. He doesn't understand what all men who are good lovers do: that if he pleases you first and truly makes sure that you are well-satisfied, then you will give him all the pleasure he can stand. I hope things improve for you in this department. You deserve a good sex life.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and the statement about children, ignore it. Children are harder work than dogs and can be equally destructive, but they are CHILDREN!

Yes, Mrs. Lovejoy, the mere fact that they are human children makes everything magically all better! That's why no child in the history of the world has ever been slapped, screamed at, beaten or abandoned by an out-of-control parent. Ever!

Anonymous said...

#1658 - Doesn't feel quite the same on the other side, does it? For what it's worth, I feel sorry for you. You made your bed, but it's an awfully painful one and I'm sorry you're in it.

Anonymous said...

Hey 1660, it IS a hardship being a single mom. Some of us just make the best of it and move on...but don't let anyone fool you into thinking it's easy.

Anonymous said...

1653 - you actually have to spend some time with dogs to TEACH them manners and good behavior. Chances are they're bored so they chew, they need to exercise. Bad dogs are more often then not the product of bad people.

And, since you've commented - in some ways dogs can be like kids, you actually have to be an active participant in the relationship with them. And you have to work the obedience lessons learned on both sides.

Anonymous said...

Oh, 1660, I can completely empathize with you. I hate those "my life is so much harder than yours" bitches. And since there's a child involved, you'll never be able to get rid of her. Hopefully he'll see what it does to you, but you just have to decide that he's worth it.

Anonymous said...

to 4:20 - 7:03 here. I have NO idea what your statements have to do with anything I said. I have infinately more patience with my children than I could ever have with a dog because I don't like dogs very much. That does not mean I am an evil or abusive person. I just means I should never have a dog. And I don't. Luckily I discovered this very early on, as a child, when my father's dog made my life a living Hell, so I have never adopted a one. Oh, and before you start blaming my dad for being a looser owner, and turning me against all that is good and decent, he spent thousands of hours and thousands of dollars trying to train that dog. The dog was severely mentally retarded and Dad didn't have the heart to have him put to sleep until he became agressive toward my sister and me. I suppose you think he should have sacrificed the kids? After all, it wasn't the dog's fault and any decent person would love us all the same. People who think that are the reason why PETA is now recognized by the US government as a terrorist organization.

Yes, there are children who are abused horribly. The people who do that are bad people. People who don't love dogs are not necessarily bad people. I know people who treat their dogs better than their kids. THOSE are bad people.

Lisa Knight said...

#1651 - Get out of my head... creepy.

1652 - HA! Love it!

1654 - Sorry, I now know how my dh would feel if he could...

1659 - ouch...btw it won't work he won't notice if you just lay there...tried it.

Anonymous said...

1:28 am -- You Rock! I couldn't have said it better. People who anthropomorph their pets are CREEPY and shouldn't have children.

Anonymous said...

1:28 -- We get it, lady, you hate dogs. Whatever, enjoy. The rambling terrorism hysterics provided an extra-special laugh from Loony Land, however. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I love dogs, and have always had a big dog in the house. I spend a lot of time teaching my dog good behavior and fun tricks. My last dog was perfect in every respect EXCEPT he was incredibly destructive when left alone. I did everything I could to set him up for success, keeping things out of reach, a special treat dispenser puzzle to distract him when I left, kept him well exercised, practiced good "leaving" and "returning" behavior... Nothing worked. He was't panicked, he was bored and lonely. I found him a home with other dogs, kids, and a stay-at-home mom. He's a perfect angel for them. Sometimes you have to be brave enough to put the dogs wants/needs above your own. My next dog will be an older lazy dog that wants to sleep all day!

Anonymous said...

1660- This is some of the most atrocious grammar I have ever read. Wtf? It's beyond stupid.

(of whom which you have a beautiful daughter with).

Anonymous said...

hey 11:59

sorry my grammer upset you and i am beyond stupid. once again i thought this was an ok site just to pound away on my computer my frustration. you made me feel bad, and kind of mad. i am done with this site. you are an ugly person. get some help.

you forgot to correct my use of all lower case too smart ass. i did not even spellcheck so you can have a lot of fun with this you grammer nazi.