Confession #1661
My husband asked me for a divorce last night. I have to confess -- I'm relieved. It's been coming for years. So maybe this will be one of my last confessions here. I don't ever want to be a wife again.
Confession #1662
That's OK, let ME do it!!
Yesterday you got home around 1pm, and you proceeded to do nothing! I
got off work picked up one of the kids and took her over to the other
campus for her evening class. While waiting for her I picked up your
vitamins at that store nearby. I thought you were going to put the
frozen lasagna in the oven, after all you said you would. Well, when I
got home at 5:30, I didn't even check I just assumed you had. I came
upstairs where you were at your computer (AGAIN), shopping on ebay for
coins (AGAIN). You informed me that the shredder needed to be emptied,
it was jamming. I'm sorry, when did you become an double
amputee???????? I went back downstairs to get a trash bag, for some
reason every male in our house thinks there is a secret combination lock
on any cabinet, drawer, or closet that contains cleaning products. Came
up emptied the stupid shredder, the two trash cans in the bedroom and
then went back downstairs to throw it out.
That is when I noticed that you hadn't put the lasagna in, so I did
that. While waiting for that to be done, I cleaned up the kitchen, for
the second time that day, set the table, made the rest of dinner. Came
to sit with you and asked if you had taken the other kid's shirt to the
dry cleaner because he has a concert the next night. You said, oh, I
thought you were going to do that......nope dude you said YOU were!! So
up the stairs I go and get all of the dry cleaning and rush over because
the place closes at 7pm. Then I have to go over to the grocery store
because no one remembered to pick up the allergy medicine. We sit down
to dinner at 7:30, you are mad because I didn't want to sit and watch
some stupid show with you. I clean up after dinner.
IDIOT, I'm going in for knee surgery in two weeks - you know that after
my surgery last year it is extremely painful to go up and down the
stairs. Don't you remember that I left my first husband because he
expected me to do everything......
Confession #1663
What is wrong with me?!?! You love me better than I deserve, I know this. And yet I don't want to be married. Not to you, not to anyone. It's not your fault. I knew when we got married that I shouldn't do it, I'm just not built for it, but I did it anyway. I love you, I'll always love you but I don't love you like I should. Can I even get out of this? I know I can but I will break your heart if I do, and I don't know if I can handle doing that to you. So, maybe it's better to stay where I am.
Confession #1664
I dont even know how to start this. While I'm happy you've lost the weight and are working and i'm proud at how hard you're working at this, i'm pissed that you are putting it all before your family.
I get so annoyed to hear you say you started working out before the 2 year old is put to bed, I'm sick of hearing about your workout, every minute detail, I dont care, my eyes glaze over, but what makes me snap back to attention is the blantant point that you are putting YOU first and not our kids. Its not fair to the 8 year old to make her watch her brothers for an hour to an hour and a half while you work out, spend some fucking time with these kids, she's failing school, are you helping her with homework or making sure she's doing the extra work I've left out for her? No because you have to do the treadmill. Stop putting yourself first and our kids last, they are more important than some little belly bulge you've got left.
Things need to change, you have changed so much in the past year and I dont like the person you are becoming. You are becoming so damn vain, do you REALLY need to ask me EVERY FUCKING DAY if your stomach looks flatter? WTF?! Every time you pass a mirror you look at yourself, cut it OUT! And I was serious when I told you I wanted you to stop taking that protein stuff, you have such awful mood swings when on it that I want to brain you.
As for you and I, I dont even know what to do with that anymore, your little snit fits because I didn't want to read what you were reading on the computer, guess what, that stuff isn't that funny or interesting to me and you expected me to read 12 pages of posts on it? After working and being tired the last thing I want to do is appease you, and YES you had an attitude. When you slam stuff on your desk and shut down the computer and bitch that what I was watching is Boring as all hell, yup thats a TUDE Mr. Snit Fit.
Confession #1665
All those things I said in our fight last night, I meant them! As mean as they were, I mean every one of them! You tell me that I have no empathy, but you are wrong. I have empathy for everyone but you. I do not care to put myself in your shoes because I do not care how you feel anymore. How many times must I cater to your hypochondria? Must I forgive your lies, your gambling, your substance abuse forever? Well, I am not. 2 years is all you have. I will finish my degree and I am gone. The only way that I can stand to look at you another second is to know that this relationship has an expiration date, and it is 2 years!!
Oh, and by the way...the reason that I seem so self absorbed to you, is because you are a textbook narcissist. But you will never recognize that either....will you?
Confession #1666
Dear Husband,
First and foremost, thank you so much for helping me create and care for our beautiful son, thank you for providing us with the luxuries of a beautiful home that we own and all of the other wonderful amenities. Thank you for working so hard for your family and never hesitating to put us before yourself. You are wonderful.
That being said, dear Husand... would it be possible for you to perhaps regain some semblance of your former personal hygeine habits? You have a dirty job hunny and when you come home, you stink. I do not like to smell your ass and or balls. Could you possibly shave your face for me occasionally? You ask me all the time why I turn my head when you try to kiss me. Darling, you have the most toxic breath I have ever had the personal pleasure of smelling. Brush your teeth already! I understand that you have *bad teeth* That is not an excuse to completely neglect your dental hygeine.
I shower regularly and even brush my teeth! Trust me, it is not alot of effort and the pay off for you my dear sweet husband would be huge! I love you, but please JUST WASH YOUR ASS!
Confession #1667
A male point of view, I have so many thoughts running around in my head since I stumbled across this blog, I have read everyone and it hits home to me so much, I was all those guys that everyone writes about..
I married my high school girlfriend at 22, only because she pushed me get married or else.[I'm leaving you] so I figured what the hell all my friends have gotten married so I might as well. Should have known things might not work out when I tried to pickup on one of the bridesmaids at my own wedding.
It just got better from there, I'll spare you all the details but for 8 years I had so many affairs I can't count them all, her friends, co-workers anyone that would go I was up for it. After we divorced I continued my ways but somewhere along the way I gave that all up, nobody deserves to be treated that way, that person I was, no longer exist today.
As I read all these confessions I wonder why men want to treat their girls the way they do
Cheating, ignoring, internet porn,thinking of their wife as a maid , taxi driver,and just there to pick up after them.. I don't get. I have never remarried but I can tell you if I ever found THAT woman, things would be different... everyone needs their own time but you also have to think of the feelings of your mate to. Reading these stories makes me remember what a jerk I was and how you don't know what you have till it's gone............
Confession #1668
I cheated on you. I was with someone who was more drunk than I; he was flirty, grabby, and I didn't care at the time. I laughed and told him to stop; we were playing. We went to his place along with several friends. Our intent was to drink more, talk, and stay up til dawn. Somehow our talking was done in bed. He was constantly trying to get me out of the night shirt he lent me; I found it amusing. We didn't have sex but I don't think that matters when one is lying practically naked next to someone other than their beloved.
When I got home the next morning, you were asleep in our bed. I didn't tell you.
Now it's the second day and I'm starting to feel ill inside. If I continue to keep this to myself, I will come to despise myself. Still, I'd rather be self-loathing than feel your anger, disappointment, and hurt.
I am so sorry.
Confession #1669
Sometimes, when I tell you I’m working, all I’m really doing is reading slash fiction about characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Confession #1670
Ha! So I think I am still in love with the married man that I "dated" before you.
I never got to say goodbye to him and it is bothering me tremendously - I guess I hoped that the feelings would fade.
But they haven't.
I sent him a text message a few weeks ago when you were being a dick headed asshole (remember that?) and he
has been surprisingly receptive to me.
We have talked about fucking and he promises that now that I've hurt him so badly (told him that I used him, faked orgasms and the like) that he can fuck me without any of the emotion. I told him my most intimate sexual desire - I am craving pussy. I want to taste it, I want to feel it, I want to lick a wet, dripping pussy - I want to make a pussy cum.
He wants to watch me do it. But he admitted that he wants to fuck me, first.
The other night when I told you I went to work, I went to meet him.
At first, it was weird seeing him. He has lost weight and looks wonderful. But my heart didn't skip a beat, it immediately felt wrong.
But I kissed him and that got my pussy so very wet. My neck got hot and the hairs on my neck and arms stood up.
I honestly fought it for about 15 seconds and then I kissed him again and again. I put his hand inside my thong and told him to go deep. Feeling his fingers sliding around inside me - pretty much sealed it for me.
We hopped into his truck and I quickly put his dick in my mouth. It tasted so good - I wanted him to cum in my mouth so I could come home and kiss you but it didn't go down like that.
Instead I sat on his dick. Unfortunately, I have a tiny bit of conscious left in me so after a few good strokes - I hopped off.
Now you are out of town for awhile and I am thinking of having him over ....
I have told you that you need to keep me happy. Your constant bitching about what I do wrong (or rather what I don't do right!) is pushing me away.
It happened to you before - now it is happening again. I KNOW I'm fucked up but when will you recognize that you are too?
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33 comments:
1661, 1663 – I’ve never been married, and I feel that way. I love my life the way it is. And I’m just getting too old to change now.
1666 – LOL. I had "that" guy once. Only showered/brushed his teeth IF we were leaving the house. I dreaded weekends in with him.
1667 – You grew up. It happens. You married too young. You didn’t know who were, let alone who you were as a couple. Congratulations on finally figuring it out. I am sure your next wife will be a very lucky lady.
1670 - Next time just send it to Penthouse and spare us.
Anonymous said...
1670 - Next time just send it to Penthouse and spare us.
1:25 PM
BWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH OMG that made me laugh so hard LOL
I don't even have any comments for the posters today, just had to get that in there LOL
1670 - Next time just send it to Penthouse and spare us.
Hee! You hit the nail on the head, although bad cheesy blogporn can be good for the occasional laugh.
1667: Actually, I've been secretly wishing Dawn would start the husband version of TWC. It would be fascinating.
1670-
I been thinking the same thing. I never been with a girl either and i would like to try and do exactly what u said... Most women would secrectly make a pussy cum and iam one of them
1670: Is it REALLY necessary to be THAT graphic? I understand that this is a confessional and all, but sometimes it's good to use a little tact and realize, not everyone wants to read something THAT detailed.
I think a True Husband Confessions would be a great idea, too.
Apparently, there already is.
1670-bleh. And as far as you've already gone...yeah I don't see a CONSCIENCE there at all.
I'm going 70-30 odds that 4:31 is actually a dude.
Sadly, the person who originally took a stab at True Husband Confessions seems to have abandoned it.
#1662 - You're enabling these men/children to continue with their lazy ways. Why did you empty the shredder? Stop doing everything and they will stop expecting it. Just try it for awhile: it just might work. And good luck! Doing it all without any appreciation sucks.
1661, I'm 1663 - I wish my husband would do that too, it would be a huge relief. Still very sad, and honestly, I'd cry over it for a while but in the end I'd be relieved to have my own life again.
12:12 - good for you for knowing yourself well enough to make you're own way. I wish that I'd recognized completely how I shouldn't marry. I've painted myself into a corner, it's no fun at all.
1662. Why are you doing what he asks? Stop it. Just stop it. You have a choice about whether to do it or not. He's not holding a gun to your head, is he? Apparently it's easier for you to do it for him than to let him do it himself or go without.
I'm #1662 - you are right, no one is forcing me to do everything. It seems I'm the only one who is bothered by 2 days worth of dishes in the sink, or piles of trash in the bedroom. It would be easy to say, no, but then nothing gets done. I don't want to be sitting down to dinner at 9pm at night, and I don't want to order in everynight. So what do I do? Let things fall apart? I guess my dilema is that it doesn't seem to bother anyone else in the house - but I cannot live that way. I am honestly asking.
#1662
I had some serious success when I used Flylady techniques. Everything has a day in which you worry about it, so you aren't sweating things out on the inappropriate day. Honestly, my to do list was HUGE until I started this and now, not so much.
Good Luck!
1662.. my friends call this over-functioning. i go on strike occasionally- it only works if you can stand the mess.
1667...you sound fake. hopefully i am wrong.
1670..TMI
#1662, you should focus on the fact that he is making you feel taken for granted, and adding to your stress. He may not care about dishes in the sink or ordering take-out instead of cooking, but he damn well SHOULD care that he is making his wife's life harder. That's what I said to my husband, and it worked for me. Good luck.
#1662, this will sound bitchy, but is meant to be helpful, I promise.
Why are you picking up *his* vitamins?
When he tells you the shredder needed emptying, why don't you say, "Then empty it. The bags are in X location." ?
When he tells you that he forgot to go to the dry cleaners, why not hand him the car keys and say, "They close at 7 pm. Better hurry."?
You're right in that you'll probably never get your family to care as much as you do about dishes in the sink...but if it's that much of a problem, why not just use paper plates and disposable silverware? Yes, yes, it costs money...but your sanity is important too.
I'm being this specific because I think that, for a lot of women, it's easier to just go ahead and do things rather than identifying occasions for others to do them. Which is fine if you're okay with doing all of the work...but you, specifically, are clearly not. Time for your husband to get his own vitamins, methinks...
#1662 here again, thank you all for responding. I guess I either need to get over my need to have everything nice or do it all and quit bitching. I have heard the term over-functioning before, so you were right on target. I will try your suggestions and see what happens. Most days my life is just busy, some days it is crazy and those are the days I wish someone would pick up the slack, I will try to just let it slack and not worry about it. Thanks again.
#1662, maybe decide what you can live with and what you can't, and focus on fixing the stuff you can't live with? But I have to say...from your entry, it seems to me that there's at least SOME room for you to pare down your workload without worsening the appearance of your house. If your husband isn't going to do any tasks for you, why do any for him (i.e. picking up those vitamins)?
1664--Wow, are you jealous or what? As someone who knows about weight loss I know that you have to put yourself first in order to take care of yourself. Also, he's asking for your loving opinion on how he looks. Funny how men need approval too. Aren't you glad he's asking you how he looks instead of the cute hot chick at his work? Sound like your the selfish one. If your not first no one can be. Hmm.
I disagree w/ 1:28 pm. It's really easy to go from a fat slob to a big-fat narcisist. As a grown-up, you have to put your family first. Yes, staying healthy and exercising is important, but 1664 gets to pick up all the slack while her DH gets to take care of him him him. It's exhausting.
1666 - I'm married to this guy. It took me four years to get him to go to the dentist. Three years to get him to the doctor's to sort out the rosacea on his face. I'm still working on his toenails and shaving habits. And there's no way on earth I'd go down on him.
I haven't got any credit for doing this stuff for him. I'm not sure why I bothered in the first place - there must be a reason, if only I could find out what it is!
1670- Way TMI...I totally agree with the folks telling you to save it for Penthouse or Hussler.
To 1661 and to 1663..
I am 1665 and it would also be a relief to me if my husband wanted a divorce. I am sure I would cry a bit ,too, but I would bounce back. I actually think that he tries to drive me crazy, purposely doing obnoxious things, simply so that I will be the one to leave and he can walk away being "the one who tried".
"Sadly, the person who originally took a stab at True Husband Confessions seems to have abandoned it."
It got abandoned because any confession a guy left, he would would get blasted about feeling the way he was feeling. There were only a few that didn't get passed off as an being from a guy that "had no balls", "was a bitter angry guy" or "insensitive jerk"
Whether the comments were written by women or his fellow man, it must have felt like a waste of time for the person running the site and the men confessing to it.
I know that on this site, women are blasted sometimes and praised other times, but it had a comepletely differnt undertone there.
(BTW - There used to also be a True Mom Confesions, and a Tru Kid Confession - the later being almost heartbreaking to read sometimes)
It got abandoned because any confession a guy left, he would would get blasted about feeling the way he was feeling.
Are we talking about the same thing? I went back and perused the comments on the old truehusbandconfessions.blogspot site, and they seem pretty tame, unless they were all edited.
I just went back and looked and you are right, most of them, if not all, are tame. I had not been back there in ages. The last time I was there there were three confession in a row that were picked apart and blasted and one of the guys actually commented back saying that he felt more alone in his feelings and felt bad all over again. I wasn't not able to find those confessions so they may have been deleted (when she re-vamped the site) or I may be crazy - been known to happen.
And I do take back the generalizing in my post previously. I'm sure that there are a bunch of reasons why the site didn't work out (it seems that Spam was one of the major ones). I think I was just trying to make the point that I noticed a different tone over there then I did at the time over here. Even we get snippy with eachother here sometimes.
THC and TKC failed because there weren't enough confessions. Yhey lacked th eability to pull an audience, which Dawn does so well.
That was my point. Men didn't want to get their ass chewed, so they didn't bother submitting anything in.
That and the fact that alot of men don't feel the need to use a forum to vent.
1662, you slay me! I know exactly what you mean about the helplessness. What I do is save up all his requests and number how many times during the day I'm required to "hop up" and do X. Then, once I've settled down for the evening, I proceed to ask him to: hop up and get me a glass of water, take my water down to the kitchen when I'm down, lower the room temperature, raise the room temperature, get me a blanket, etc. etc. etc. And when he objects, I list all the errands he's asked me to do that day. Strange, I'm not asked to "hop up" and bring him something nearly so much anymore . .
Dawn should make a "husband confession" site, or maybe just a day in this one.
Umm, 1670's story, penthouse or not kinda ruled. ;)
I'm trying to revive the true husband confessions site, not too much going on yet, but if I build it, someone will come :)
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