My husband asked me for a divorce last night. I have to confess -- I'm relieved. It's been coming for years. So maybe this will be one of my last confessions here. I don't ever want to be a wife again.
That's OK, let ME do it!!
Yesterday you got home around 1pm, and you proceeded to do nothing! I
got off work picked up one of the kids and took her over to the other
campus for her evening class. While waiting for her I picked up your
vitamins at that store nearby. I thought you were going to put the
frozen lasagna in the oven, after all you said you would. Well, when I
got home at 5:30, I didn't even check I just assumed you had. I came
upstairs where you were at your computer (AGAIN), shopping on ebay for
coins (AGAIN). You informed me that the shredder needed to be emptied,
it was jamming. I'm sorry, when did you become an double
amputee???????? I went back downstairs to get a trash bag, for some
reason every male in our house thinks there is a secret combination lock
on any cabinet, drawer, or closet that contains cleaning products. Came
up emptied the stupid shredder, the two trash cans in the bedroom and
then went back downstairs to throw it out.
That is when I noticed that you hadn't put the lasagna in, so I did
that. While waiting for that to be done, I cleaned up the kitchen, for
the second time that day, set the table, made the rest of dinner. Came
to sit with you and asked if you had taken the other kid's shirt to the
dry cleaner because he has a concert the next night. You said, oh, I
thought you were going to do that......nope dude you said YOU were!! So
up the stairs I go and get all of the dry cleaning and rush over because
the place closes at 7pm. Then I have to go over to the grocery store
because no one remembered to pick up the allergy medicine. We sit down
to dinner at 7:30, you are mad because I didn't want to sit and watch
some stupid show with you. I clean up after dinner.
IDIOT, I'm going in for knee surgery in two weeks - you know that after
my surgery last year it is extremely painful to go up and down the
stairs. Don't you remember that I left my first husband because he
expected me to do everything......
What is wrong with me?!?! You love me better than I deserve, I know this. And yet I don't want to be married. Not to you, not to anyone. It's not your fault. I knew when we got married that I shouldn't do it, I'm just not built for it, but I did it anyway. I love you, I'll always love you but I don't love you like I should. Can I even get out of this? I know I can but I will break your heart if I do, and I don't know if I can handle doing that to you. So, maybe it's better to stay where I am.
I dont even know how to start this. While I'm happy you've lost the weight and are working and i'm proud at how hard you're working at this, i'm pissed that you are putting it all before your family.
I get so annoyed to hear you say you started working out before the 2 year old is put to bed, I'm sick of hearing about your workout, every minute detail, I dont care, my eyes glaze over, but what makes me snap back to attention is the blantant point that you are putting YOU first and not our kids. Its not fair to the 8 year old to make her watch her brothers for an hour to an hour and a half while you work out, spend some fucking time with these kids, she's failing school, are you helping her with homework or making sure she's doing the extra work I've left out for her? No because you have to do the treadmill. Stop putting yourself first and our kids last, they are more important than some little belly bulge you've got left.
Things need to change, you have changed so much in the past year and I dont like the person you are becoming. You are becoming so damn vain, do you REALLY need to ask me EVERY FUCKING DAY if your stomach looks flatter? WTF?! Every time you pass a mirror you look at yourself, cut it OUT! And I was serious when I told you I wanted you to stop taking that protein stuff, you have such awful mood swings when on it that I want to brain you.
As for you and I, I dont even know what to do with that anymore, your little snit fits because I didn't want to read what you were reading on the computer, guess what, that stuff isn't that funny or interesting to me and you expected me to read 12 pages of posts on it? After working and being tired the last thing I want to do is appease you, and YES you had an attitude. When you slam stuff on your desk and shut down the computer and bitch that what I was watching is Boring as all hell, yup thats a TUDE Mr. Snit Fit.
All those things I said in our fight last night, I meant them! As mean as they were, I mean every one of them! You tell me that I have no empathy, but you are wrong. I have empathy for everyone but you. I do not care to put myself in your shoes because I do not care how you feel anymore. How many times must I cater to your hypochondria? Must I forgive your lies, your gambling, your substance abuse forever? Well, I am not. 2 years is all you have. I will finish my degree and I am gone. The only way that I can stand to look at you another second is to know that this relationship has an expiration date, and it is 2 years!!
Oh, and by the way...the reason that I seem so self absorbed to you, is because you are a textbook narcissist. But you will never recognize that either....will you?
First and foremost, thank you so much for helping me create and care for our beautiful son, thank you for providing us with the luxuries of a beautiful home that we own and all of the other wonderful amenities. Thank you for working so hard for your family and never hesitating to put us before yourself. You are wonderful.
That being said, dear Husand... would it be possible for you to perhaps regain some semblance of your former personal hygeine habits? You have a dirty job hunny and when you come home, you stink. I do not like to smell your ass and or balls. Could you possibly shave your face for me occasionally? You ask me all the time why I turn my head when you try to kiss me. Darling, you have the most toxic breath I have ever had the personal pleasure of smelling. Brush your teeth already! I understand that you have *bad teeth* That is not an excuse to completely neglect your dental hygeine.
I shower regularly and even brush my teeth! Trust me, it is not alot of effort and the pay off for you my dear sweet husband would be huge! I love you, but please JUST WASH YOUR ASS!
A male point of view, I have so many thoughts running around in my head since I stumbled across this blog, I have read everyone and it hits home to me so much, I was all those guys that everyone writes about..
I married my high school girlfriend at 22, only because she pushed me get married or else.[I'm leaving you] so I figured what the hell all my friends have gotten married so I might as well. Should have known things might not work out when I tried to pickup on one of the bridesmaids at my own wedding.
It just got better from there, I'll spare you all the details but for 8 years I had so many affairs I can't count them all, her friends, co-workers anyone that would go I was up for it. After we divorced I continued my ways but somewhere along the way I gave that all up, nobody deserves to be treated that way, that person I was, no longer exist today.
As I read all these confessions I wonder why men want to treat their girls the way they do
Cheating, ignoring, internet porn,thinking of their wife as a maid , taxi driver,and just there to pick up after them.. I don't get. I have never remarried but I can tell you if I ever found THAT woman, things would be different... everyone needs their own time but you also have to think of the feelings of your mate to. Reading these stories makes me remember what a jerk I was and how you don't know what you have till it's gone............
I cheated on you. I was with someone who was more drunk than I; he was flirty, grabby, and I didn't care at the time. I laughed and told him to stop; we were playing. We went to his place along with several friends. Our intent was to drink more, talk, and stay up til dawn. Somehow our talking was done in bed. He was constantly trying to get me out of the night shirt he lent me; I found it amusing. We didn't have sex but I don't think that matters when one is lying practically naked next to someone other than their beloved.
When I got home the next morning, you were asleep in our bed. I didn't tell you.
Now it's the second day and I'm starting to feel ill inside. If I continue to keep this to myself, I will come to despise myself. Still, I'd rather be self-loathing than feel your anger, disappointment, and hurt.
I am so sorry.
Sometimes, when I tell you I’m working, all I’m really doing is reading slash fiction about characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
Ha! So I think I am still in love with the married man that I "dated" before you.
I never got to say goodbye to him and it is bothering me tremendously - I guess I hoped that the feelings would fade.
But they haven't.
I sent him a text message a few weeks ago when you were being a dick headed asshole (remember that?) and he
has been surprisingly receptive to me.
We have talked about fucking and he promises that now that I've hurt him so badly (told him that I used him, faked orgasms and the like) that he can fuck me without any of the emotion. I told him my most intimate sexual desire - I am craving pussy. I want to taste it, I want to feel it, I want to lick a wet, dripping pussy - I want to make a pussy cum.
He wants to watch me do it. But he admitted that he wants to fuck me, first.
The other night when I told you I went to work, I went to meet him.
At first, it was weird seeing him. He has lost weight and looks wonderful. But my heart didn't skip a beat, it immediately felt wrong.
But I kissed him and that got my pussy so very wet. My neck got hot and the hairs on my neck and arms stood up.
I honestly fought it for about 15 seconds and then I kissed him again and again. I put his hand inside my thong and told him to go deep. Feeling his fingers sliding around inside me - pretty much sealed it for me.
We hopped into his truck and I quickly put his dick in my mouth. It tasted so good - I wanted him to cum in my mouth so I could come home and kiss you but it didn't go down like that.
Instead I sat on his dick. Unfortunately, I have a tiny bit of conscious left in me so after a few good strokes - I hopped off.
Now you are out of town for awhile and I am thinking of having him over ....
I have told you that you need to keep me happy. Your constant bitching about what I do wrong (or rather what I don't do right!) is pushing me away.
It happened to you before - now it is happening again. I KNOW I'm fucked up but when will you recognize that you are too?