Friday, May 11, 2007

True Wife Confessions Turk 182!

Confession #1811

I miss you. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t wish you’d take me back. I wish I could go back and change things. I wish you would have told me how you were feeling, instead of telling me what you thought I wanted to hear. I could have fixed it. I could have changed it all and we’d still be together.

I never thought the day would come when you didn’t love me anymore. The one thing I could always put my faith and trust in was your love for me. I even believed that you loved me more than I loved you. So now when I see you treat me with such coldness, I don’t think I can ever believe in love again.

I feel ruined as a person. Unworthy, unlovable, unmarriable. I made plans with you, big plans, cars, houses, jobs, vacations, kids, and every lazy day in between in your arms. Now I can only plan to make it through the entire day without driving head-on into oncoming traffic. The day I lost you was the beginning of the rest of my life spent alone.

Confession #1812

you cannot blame our house being a disaster (when i returned home from having an emergency c-sec w/ twins) on our 5 yr old. dickhead

Confession #1813

I do not see the need to change the sheets after we have sex. Every time. I mean, I could see if we were having long sessions of sweaty sex, but come on! Every time. Never fail. You hop up, and start stripping the bed. Sweetie, I change the sheets once or twice a week anyways, so I can't see how they are so foul that they need to be changed. It's weird.

Confession #1814

The last few weeks you have been an ass. More so than usual. I
couldn't figure out what the hell your problem was, especially with
everything we are going through. I thought you were worried about
having to be the active parent while I am on bed rest. But then today
at teh Docors I saw you actually let out a breath when we were told
we had made teh right decsion and that everything is going to be ok
now. It hit me, you have been worried about ME. Not about what I
could or couldn't do but about me. You have been amazing through this
and I can't thank you enough honey. I love you. I always have but I
realize now that it goes both ways. I actually matter to you. I've
known that you love me but I never realized how much. I am so very
sorry that I didn't see it before. I can't begin to list everything I
am thankful for. I LOVE YOU.

Confession #1815

Dear Husband,



I dropped you off at the airport early monday morning. Today is wednesday. I noticed something very interesting, nothing changes when you are gone. I still take care of everything, including our daughter, dinner, mornings, chores, laundry, friends stopping by. I think the only way I know you are truly gone is I'm sleeping better than I have since we got married.

No tossing and turning at all.

And no fighting.



I think I'm ready for that divorce now.



Your wife for now,

A

Confession #1816

Honey, I do love you. I'm sorry for the pills. I know I've told you that before. You have given me everything I've ever wanted.

I just don't know what my wants are right now. Thank you for trying AGAIN.

You are not innocent in all this either. I've forgiven you, but I'm having a hard time forgetting. I will NEVER have another close female friend again. It's so hard to trust and so easy to escape.

I don't know what the right thing to do is.....Help.

Confession #1817

I am only nice to your dad because I love you. He's an asshole. He treats your mom like shit and he's a control freak. What kind of man keeps driving on a road trip, after you mother has declared that she needs to go to the bathroom and waits until the poor woman is in tears of pain before he actually pulls over? An asshole that's who. Who checks the electricty wattage everyday to make sure no additional electricity is being used? An asshole, that's who. Who constantly treats his wife like she's a flippin' moron? An asshole, that's who. Who is such a control freak he didn't want your mom to work while you were a child and now threatens to take away her $20 per week "allowance" anytime she does something that pisses him off? An asshole, that's who. Who tells his wife that her bags will be on the front lawn when she has two children under 5 because she stood up for herself? An asshole, that's who.

Your dad is an asshole, I don't care if he's a devout Catholic, I don't care if he's sorry afterward, you father is a colossal asshole and I think he's a disgusting human being.

Confession #1818

You never say you love me. I know you do, but you never actually say it.
And because you don't say it, I'm afraid to say it; to say it, and not
have you say anything in return. We've been together for almost 2 years
now, and we're still afraid to say those 3 little words.

We've both been hurt. I know thats why we don't say it. Saying those
words makes things more real, more serious, and leaves us open to more
hurt. I understand all that. I do. I'm not judging you. I'm scared
too.

But what you don't know is that when I'm taking those 2 hour long bubble
baths with the door locked, I'm really sitting there, crying.

Because I want so desperately to be told that I'm loved.

And to be able to tell you that you are too.

Confession #1819

Sweetie - I know that you want to try and run a marathon. It is an admirable achievement - but the orthopedic running shoes? You look like an elderly Frankenstein hobbling down the street.

Confession #1820

You don't turn me on anymore. I'm tired of using a vibe.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

1818... I swear you stole my confession. Word for word, everything you said applies to my relationship too. *sigh*

Anonymous said...

1811: I'm sorry you feel this way, and hope that in time you'll see that with new people entering your life that you will re-discover that you are likable, lovable, and marry-able.

But if, before then, you succumb to the dark side, do us all a favor and spare the oncoming traffic. Find a brick wall, a telephone pole, or some other object that won't result in injury to others.

S.Elizabeth said...

1811:
I wish I could I say something to make you feel better...
But it's that I feel the same way or maybe worse.
I am sorry.

1817:
Totally agree with you.
He's F***ing asshole.

1819:
Why don't you make a suggestion, and go shopping for new pair of sneakers with him?

Anonymous said...

Reply to #1818:
I understand that you both have been hurt, but it has been almost 2 years and he has not told you that he loves you. It is time to have that talk with him about how you feel and let him know that you love him and you need that affection of love back from him. i have had this experience and I understand how you feel, I was with some one for 1 1/2 and he never told me he loved me, the reason why he never told me because he did not. So it was just a big waste of my time. I encourage you to take that step because, my grandmother always told me" Baby, close mouths don't get feed'.

God Bless

Anonymous said...

#1818: I find it very hard to believe that after 2 years, you can't bring yourselves to say I love you. If not now, when?

And if you don't feel it strongly enough to say it, why are you still together?

Anonymous said...

#1820 Yeah, I hear ya.

Anonymous said...

1817: I am angry just reading your confession! I hope you either stand up to him or leave him. He doesn't deserve you!

alosha said...

1811:

"I feel ruined as a person. Unworthy, unlovable, unmarriable. I made plans with you, big plans, cars, houses, jobs, vacations, kids, and every lazy day in between in your arms. Now I can only plan to make it through the entire day without driving head-on into oncoming traffic."

oh honey, I remember that feeling. you feel like you're just going to die of pain. hang in there, sweetie. you will recover, I guarantee you. it's hard, but you will.

Anonymous said...

#1813, here is a little confession of my own: I'm lucky to change our sheets once a month. Hahaha! Granted we only have sex a few times between changes. It just doesn't bother us. Whatever gets on the sheets will dry. I would definitely be weirded out if my husband insisted on changing them immediately after. Perhaps he has OCD or something.

Anonymous said...

1818: I have SO been there. My ex boyfriend never said I love you but I knew he did. I never said it because I was scared and I thought I had all the time in the world to say it. I would lie in bed at night next to him while he was snoring away blissfully while I silently sobbed myself to sleep. We broke up and then when he was really scared that I was moving on he said, "I fucking love you, alright?" No, not alright. He made it feel like a slap in the face.

I am happily married to someone now that screams he loves me from the mountain tops. Maybe that was my attraction to him because I was so 'hungry' for that affirmation. I still miss my old boyfriend sometimes. If I had just kissed him one time, looked into his eyes and said, "I love you" I think it all would have been ok.

My advice to you? Just say it. If you need help then get drunk first. :)

Anonymous said...

1821- Your a BITCH!

Some Husband said...

Sorry to be reading your confessions ladies.

1815: My wife said this to me the other day, minus the divorce part. But it concerns me. Maybe her confession would be the divorce part. It's so hard because I'm trying so hard but I just don't see all of that stuff--laundry, dishes, etc. I just see "pay the bills", "go to work", "walk the dog" etc. Based on what you said it seems like we're both trying but just don't see what each other is doing. I sure hope your marriage gets better--and mine too!