Sometimes I wonder if you remember the night I tried to tell you I loved you. I tried and tried but couldn't do it. I figured I would have trouble telling you so I had a note in my pocket ready in the event that I chickened out... which I did. I handed you the note as we kissed goodnight and then ran into my house. You thought I was breaking up with you, but all I wanted to say was I LOVE YOU.
For the first few years of our marriage you were physically and verbally abusive. Sure you never actually hit me but you threw me around plenty. Nothing I did was ever right or ever good enough. Then you got sick and I took care of you and you learned to trust me, and rely on me, and for a while we were partners. So we had a baby. A beautiful, wonderful, baby. And your health got better and you pushed me away once again. Then last summer I found out you were seeing another woman. Maybe you didn't get the chance to sleep with her, but you would have, there are no doubts in my mind. And when I started to pack my bags to leave, you talked me into staying, and since then you have really changed. You love me and care for me the way that I wanted from the very beginning. Which is why I am so sad, because last summer when you told me that you regretted ever marrying me, my love for you died. And I think that I went through all of the grieving process. I was devastated, then angry, and now when I look at you I am numb.
That is the worst. I look at you and feel nothing. I want to love you, need you, want you, but I don't. I see you trying so hard and I want to open my heart to you, but I feel like that part of me is broken, for you. Divorce is not an option. But our marriage should never have been. I regret you. I should have married the man, that to this day, I still love. I should have married him.
So honey, I know we had to pay a $50 deductible on the phone I lost last month (for the second time). Therefore, on Saturday morning when I handed you my cell and said “it just won’t turn on”, I just couldn’t bring myself to tell you it was because I washed it Friday night with my jeans.
Thanks for going to the cell phone kiosk with me to get a replacement. You’re the best!
I can barely remember the happy times before our engagement or the perfectly adorable smile on your face that made me fall in love with you. The romance and sweet things you used to do for me is what had me loving you. You took all that away and deprived me of the simplest, least expensive, acts of love you could give me. I used to be proud to be associated with you and now I can barley stand the sight of you and your sorry excuses as to why you don’t do nice things for me or have tried to save our marriage. When you promise to take care of someone and love them forever, you don’t just stop when you get lazy, or you are broke, or tired, because we as women don’t. We keep on giving, when we are too tired, when you don’t deserve it, when you are mad at us, until there is nothing left. You were too stupid to see how lucky you were and you never deserved me. All that patience, love, trust, I had for you as turned into hate for what you knowingly have done to destroy us, then me. I will not allow you to continue to hurt me and I know I will never love you again because even when I look into your eyes, those beautiful loving eyes I fell in love with, I see the man who cheated me out of the life and love he promised me.
I really do think you’re the poster boy for why you shouldn't do drug. Remember the old commercial with the frying pan and this is your brain, this is your brain on drugs. He's a f'ing moron. Your such an idiot that you don't see in front of your own face that your losing me. I hope sometime this year to leave you and do you really think that you saying "I won't give you any child support" is really going to keep me from leaving. I can work two jobs and will for happiness away from you.
The correct response to a suggestion that we go to a sex store and buy some toys to reinvigorate our pathetic sex life is NOT "Who will get them in the divorce?" That will, in fact, pretty much assure that there will be no sex with toys....and no reinvigoration of our sex life.
You said, "We're a team. It's okay, babe. It's you and me. We're a team."
I didn't realize until you said them that those were the words I needed to hear most in that moment.
I love that fact that since our son was born in February that you have become a more emotional man. You aren't afraid to cry in front of me anymore. When our son was crying after his shots today it was touching to see you cry because he was in pain. I know why I married you, and why I wanted to have your children. Thanks for being a wonderful husband, friend, and father.
I really do love coming home to see our son in his cute ass bear suit!
I can't believe I fell for you.
You said I wasn't normally your type. You said you have so far cheated on all of your girlfriends. You said you don't want to have kids. You said you never loved anyone more than me. We got married and now I feel like I am not enough for you. You tell me you love me yet you do your own thing. You think you're the best f**** I ever had. Well let me tell you something. You are not! You are not even close. Foreplay is meant for both to be enjoyed. Yes I do need attention and so do my body parts.
There were random people I wasn't even close with that were better than you. And no I am not gagging for it.
You need to take a reality check and get a freaking life.
I love you with my heart and soul. I am so in love with you 25 years later, and feel your love each day. I'm grateful for the wonderful marriage we have. You are a wonderful husband, father & friend. The only thing I would change is during that first year we dated you cheated with my friend. It took me along time to forgive you, and it still hurts sometimes when I think of it. But honestly Im glad I did. I just wish our relationship didn't have that blemish.