Tuesday, December 18, 2007

A Thank you to the TWC community

My name is Ida and I had previously posted to TWC concerning my husband’s fetish and desire to cum on my face, a practice I felt was totally disgusting. These feelings existed between my husband and me for quite a while and finally I got to the point where I needed to vent my frustration and is where TWC entered the story. My posting generated quite and stir and so much feedback that it is what gave birth to Dawn's initiation of the Saturday Sex Chat feature. At the time of the original posting, some of the comments posted opened my eyes to certain aspects associated with my issue that I hadn't considered, so I had committed to post a follow up to describe how the issue was finally resolved. For those of you who are not familiar with the original post, I would recommend before you read this post any further, visit and read the original post and associated comments. It was posted on Monday, November 19 under the Group titled "True Wife Confessions 221 B Baker Street", post number 2208. For those of you who are familiar, the following describes what happened after the original posting and how things turned out. As mentioned in my comments to the 2208 posting, your comments made me pause because there were many aspects associated with my husband desiring to cum on my face that I hadn't thought about and frankly, my hard stance of disgust and anger became muted and allowed me to evaluate the overall situation and my feelings and reaction to the act. The first thing following the posting to TWC was to tell my husband I had major issues with him cumming on my face and until I was able to resolve those issues (and yes, I told him he would be involved in the resolution process), I would not allow him to do this to me. At first he didn't take it very well and pouted like a little boy but after a few days he got over it and gave me the space I needed to bring the issue to closure. The first revelation had to do with my aversion to the practice of a man cumming on a woman's face, specifically due to my lack of knowledge on how much this was accepted as "normal" sex for couples in the bedroom, and not just something done to porn actors and prostitutes. This eliminated the "I am all alone" feelings I had about this. The next breakthrough was associated with my feelings that this act was totally for him and from which I derive no pleasure. When he would cum on my face there were two things I had to deal with. The first was my disgust for the act and my belief that it is an abnormal practice for married couples and the second (which is directly tied to the first), I would not be in any way sexually aroused when the act occurred. The two ingredients in this recipe guaranteed the same outcome every time my husband came on my face, anger and disgust. Basically, I would just lay there and he would do it to me and that would be that. No satisfaction, just anger. Two weeks ago, I sat down with my husband and told him I was ready to discuss the issue with him. At that time, I told him he didn't understand the feelings I was harboring when he came on my face even though I told him I didn't enjoy and didn't really like him doing it to me. I then told him about TWC and how I posted as a means of venting my anger and frustration. He initially became upset about me making our personal sex life public, but when I told him the posting was anonymous, he calmed down. I went to the computer and pulled up TWC and my post and asked him to read it. He did and when he finished reading, he just sat there in silence, staring at the screen. He eventually got up from the chair and we embraced for what seemed like eternity and yes, we both did shed a few tears. He did not realize the depth of anger I had been feeling over this. I told him I would be willing to once again allow him to cum on my face but I still had a difficult time with it being a "one way" act. I told him we needed to figure out a way for me to get pleasure out the act along with him so we can share vice one giving and one receiving. We did find a way and here's how. We have tried this several times and each time it worked with no negative feelings. We lay and bed and fondle one another, getting each other sexually aroused. I would bring him to the point of erection and gently stroke him to keep him erect but not to the point of cumming. He would rub my pussy, working me with his fingers until I am very wet and nearing the point of orgasm. Next, he would leave my side and stand alongside the bed where I would suck his penis while he would be rubbing my clit with his finger. The next part takes a little practice because I want to be nearing peaking but do not want to orgasm before he cums so we signal to one another when there is a need to slow down. When he is ready to cum, he lets me know and removes his penis from my mouth and grasps it with his hand allows it shoot wherever he desires. While he his bringing himself to orgasm, I am continuing to rub my clit to keep myself near peak arousal but not to orgasm. After he finishes cumming on my face, he goes down between my legs and brings me to orgasm using his tongue. It is amazing on how my feelings about having cum on my face changed when it occurred when I was sexually aroused. I no longer focused on what his cum felt like or its smell while on my face because my mind was totally fixated on my own pleasure. I guess it proves the fact if you say and think you hate something long enough, when you try it you will hate it. As for the cleanup, he goes to the bathroom to get a warm wet washcloth and gently and lovingly wipes his cum from my face so I don't even have to get out of bed. We've even tried this method of parallel arousal for blowjobs finishing with him cumming in my mouth and me swallowing. Even though I've done it for him in the past, I found the taste of his cum objectionable and really had to force the swallow. Once again, having him cum in my mouth and swallowing while at a peak state of sexual changed my whole reaction to the feel and taste of his cum. Now, I am not particularly about the aftertaste of his cum but I found having a glass of wine next to the bed easily solves the problem.



With all of this said, I would like to take this opportunity to thank TWC and all of you who provided comments to my original posting. You have changed mine and my husbands life by, bringing us closer together, eliminating destructive anger that had entered our lives and helping us make our sex life more fulfilling. Who says one person cannot make a difference? Ida

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thanks for giving us an update. I'm glad you worked together to come to a solution that is great for the both of you.

What a sweet hubby you have too! You're a lucky gal :)

Anonymous said...

Isn't it cool when husbands and wives work togther?!

Good for you, Ida and hubby.

D said...

lord....this is one of the hottest things i have read on the internet.

seriously, it's fantastic that you didn't let your inhibitions stop you from exploring and that the two of you could resolve this in such a...uh...beneficial way. i think your story will help a lot of people. thanks for telling it.

p.s. to my arch-nemesis anonymous, in the original thread i predicted she would eventually start doing it and liking it. you lambasted me for having the gall to say that and others were so gung-ho in telling her not to do it or even trying to find a way to accomodate her man. funny, huh?

Anonymous said...

It is hard to let go and trust another person with such a vulnerable thing such as sexuality and eroticism. In a good marriage that may come in stages and occurs along with other aspects of intimacy and trust. Being able to voice feelings and know you're allowed to do so without reprisal or criticism is a wonderful development and the two of you sound as though you're moving nicely down that path.

I think you've discovered something important in how this particular fetish works for the two of you. Experiences like this are best shared, they can't be one-sided, and sharing erotic yearnings together can result in mutual contentment.

Congratulations on moving forward in your marriage together, I think the lesson you learned in this instance will have applications in others, too.

fairy said...

Yea Ida!!!!! Yea husband!!!! Yea fun, erotic, messy sex!!!! :)

Thanks for the update. That is awesome.

oneman said...

Thanks for update.

Glad to here that through communication and trust that you have managed to builder a stronger relationship that you both getting more out off.

Anonymous said...

Awe! Yeah for you Ida and Yeah to your hubby!Such a great post. And really good advice!

Anonymous said...

um. ugh.

Blake said...

As a man, I have to say that I would never ask this of any woman I was with. I know we all have our little fantasies in the bedroom, but I want to say this is certainly not one of mine.
I applaud her for talking with her partner about this and that's all that matters- they talked.

Anonymous said...

That's a fake post. No woman wrote that.

Finn McCool said...

8:23 - You would be surprised at what many women like. I bet you would be stunned at what your fiends actually like doing, sexually, but would not admit to you. I'm not saying you are judgemental, but you comment sounds that way.

Ida, glad things worked out for you.

Anonymous said...

Like Ida, there were certain sexual practices that my husband sought, but that I could not or would not accommodate. Until that is, I learned to make it about US not just him. I'm not the worlds best communicator, but little by little we have bridged those gulfs and like Ida, our sex life is hotter than ever.

Anonymous said...

Ida, I'm really happy for you. Honestly. But Dawn, I really miss the regular old confessions. All the sex talk is interesting, I guess, but it's not exactly what I come here for.

Dawn said...

Anon 2:08 -

I only print confessions when I have enough to print ten.

Often it is an issue of ebb and flow. No confessions coming in = no updates.

Anonymous said...

Well, I guess I've got to get to confessing, cause I agree with 2:08,I'm not that crazy about the sex talk, either.

Anonymous said...

I'm one who doesn't mind the sex talk mixed in with the confessing. I enjoy reading the confessions but to be perfectly honestly, most are downright depressing and I for one can only manage reading so many in one sitting. When I read the standard confession, the "I hate you", "You suck" or "I cheated on you because you don't care for me anymore", there is a sadness that comes over me knowing these posts are from real people. Now Ida's post started out that way but ended on a postive and uplifting note. I found the explicit nature of her post rather exciting, and it was nice that she left nothing to your imagination. I realize this type of post is not for all but I for one am appreciative of one wife's efforts to confront an issue in her marriage and not be afraid to bare her sole with all of the details to the world. Thanks Ida for sharing with us. I'm sure your post will provide the courage to others who face similar issues in their married live.

coladiola said...

YAY Dawn CHEERS Ida HOORAY Ida's husband

Thank you to everyone who thinks carefully and talks about what they think. But most of all Thank You Dawn!

Anonymous said...

Uh, hello... that's not a real confession.

That's some asshole who thinks it's funny to send one of his Penthouse forum letters here and pretend he's a woman!

Anonymous said...

to much information. i agree that was a man posting here and what his fantasy is with a woman... ewwww

SaKi said...

To the anon poster above...you know the, "too much information" lady...

Don't read it. If you read the whole thing, you obviously didn't think it was "too much information" now did you?

I don't understand why easily offended people read this damn blog. lol

Anonymous said...

Honestly if you have so much trouble with a guy coming on your face that it requires that much drama, I think you have pretty major issues that you should get checked out.

Anonymous said...

to cum on a woman's face is degrading to the woman.

what POSSIBLE reason for arousal would the location of ejaculation have? nothing, other than to mentally get a chance to pretty much degrade someone else.

gosh, would he be so willing to let her pee on his face if she pouted and treated him like shit because he found it objectionable?? yeah, uh huh. i can see THAT being 'worked out'.

please people.