OK so you went to the parent teacher conference - had we been still married I know for a fact you wouldn't have gone. Heaven forbid you missed anytime from work while we were married.
What upsets me is when his teacher asked about the field trip on Friday and I asked when the money was due you didn't offer to pay for him to go. It was $9.00 freaking bucks. I had forgotten to pay it when I dropped him off on Tuesday morning. Then you had the nerve to tell me you didn't have any money on you after I asked you for a few buck since I only had a $5.
You then went to your car and grabbed a wad of money and gave me 4 $1.00 bills. All this after I said forget it I'll go to the mac and come back. You have him - you could have paid the money tomorrow. I paid the $15 for the last field trip - which I didn't mind since I knew how much fun he would have.
It's a shame that you love your money more then your son or your wife (now ex wife). Hell you don't even pay child support - and you make twice the amount I do. O excuse me, you pay for his daycare...big deal...
You claim we didn't have the money to fix up the house, yet now that I left it's all redone and there is a $3K plasma screen TV hanging above the fireplace. ASS...
Don't worry when our son is old enough to know the truth I am going to tell him why I left you. At that time, I hope he leaves your ass too.
You should be so lucky I'm not a blood thirsty money hungry girl - I know what I'm entitled to! However, once daycare is done being paid for and he's in public school - I will take you to your knees.
I am afraid that last night was our last night together.
Maybe not forever?
I am so sad that you have moved, even though you are not really that far away.
It will change everything.
You make me smile in every way, inside and out.
I do love you, even though I have never told you.
I know that I can't make you love me.
It's killing me but I am trying to be tough.
I feel so alone.
I really do love you.
You are the best boyfriend in the world. You are sweet kind and caring and faithful. I don't deserve you. Your last business trip- I was over at the neighbors house drinking with him and his wife. I got really drunk and His wife and I got naked and messed around why he watched. I just can't tell you about it. I think you would leave me. But I am so sorry and I will never let anything like that happen again.
My husband drinks all of my soda. No matter when I open the drink he will drink all of it and leave a little sip. It used to bother the crap out of me but the more I think about it the more it makes me all tingly inside. If it wasn’t for him I would have 1,000,000 sodas open and unfinished. He definitely completes me. I love him with all my heart even if he drinks all my soda.
I know fidelity is important to you. It isn't to me, though.
Our marriage would be over if I cheated, so I won't. I'm doing this
because it's important to you. I wish you knew that, but I'm glad you don't.
My family told me it was my choice - them or you, and I picked you. I gave up everything and everyone I had loved for the past 25 years of my life to be with the man I was deeply in love with. They were angry that you were so much older than me - over twice my age - and that you were a different race. They didn't understand that you were the first person who I ever fell in love with, the first man who ever made me feel special, the only person I ever felt like I could talk to about absolutely anything. We had so much fun together and agreed on everything. And then you changed. Or maybe you were deceiving me all along. I gave you my virginity and you berated me for days saying that I couldn't have been a virgin. I guess I didn't moan enough for you. You gave me gonorrhea and then tried to break up with me, saying that I gave it to you, even though that isn't remotely possible since you are the only person I have ever had sex with, actually the only man I have ever even kissed. You get drunk every weekend and tell me that you don't love me, that you need to "get rid of me", as if I am some piece of garbage to be thrown out. Then you always apologize and want to make up, saying you were just drunk and didn't mean it. You told me to stop taking birth control pills, that you wanted us to have a baby together. So I did, but when I told you I was pregnant, you acted depressed and then later said you would have to get a paternity test. A paternity test!!! That is so hilarious. You're the one who gets drunk and goes to God knows where and doesn't come home until 2:30 in the morning, and you want a paternity test!! The whole time I was pregnant, you flip-flopped back and forth between loving me and saying you were sorry and then being drunk and jealous for no reason and calling me names. So much for feeling special, I couldn't possibly feel any lower about myself than I do now. I walk around with my eyes down to the ground so that you won't say I was looking at another man. If a man asks me a question in your presence I act completely retarded and don't even reply because you may say I was flirting with him and then I will have to pay for it later. I don't understand why there are these strict crazy rules for me, but you don't have to live by them at all. The other day you touched another woman's rear-end in front of me but later said you didn't remember doing it. Then there was the time you brought some woman into our house at 10 o'clock at night and asked me to fix her something to eat. Later I found out she was a streetwalker and when I got angry you said that you were "trying to help her" and that I was being a bitch. You do all this crap while I take care of our baby, work 40 hours a week doing a manual-labor job, keep the house clean, cook dinner every night of the week, do all the shopping/dr.appts/etc., work in the yard, and take classes online part-time. I am years from being 30 and already worn out. You are sweet (mostly) when you aren't drinking, but the rest of the time you treat me like pond scum. When I was eight months pregnant you took away the key to the house and kicked me out. I had to get a hotel room. Now our daughter is a year old and you still haven't changed. She loves you so much, and you are a good father, I'll admit that. But what about when she gets older and sees you drunk? You try to be careful, but that won't work forever. You are still an alcoholic, you still degrade me, control me, and tell me I'm a piece of crap. Not to mention that you have been promising to marry me since day one, but you now tell me you never will. You make twice the money I do but pay for nothing for our daughter and keep all of your money separate from mine. Our crappy little house needs so many repairs, but all you do on your weekends off from work is drink. Our car is even worse - no AC, the tires have no tread left on them, and I can't afford to pay for that too. Our daughter's bedroom is unusable and it looks like her crib will be staying in our room until she moves out for college. You don't know it, but I found out that your retirement and life/burial insurance are in your ex-wife's name. That is so pathetic because if you died she would roll your corpse into a ditch and keep the money for all of her new hairdos and manicures. I guess since you have made a fool out of me in life you plan to make a fool out of me in death. I have put all of my time and money into your house and your life, and none of it will ever belong to me. I never wanted your "stuff", just you, but I didn't get you either. You are two different people: the drunken you I despise and the sober you I still am terribly in love with. It's like I live two separate lives too, and one of them I can't talk about, not even to you. I wish you could be the drunken you all the time so that it would be easy to walk out the door and never see you again. I could get a bus ticket and go somewhere far away, take our little girl with me. No one would care, hardly anyone would notice, except for you when you wake up with a hangover and yell for me to bring you a goddamn cup of coffee. I don't have any friends because of you, no one to talk to. I thought we were soul mates, but I am so lonely and depressed. I want my daughter to have a happy, normal, fun life, and not to have a mom who is always anxious and sad. I just don't know if it is better for her to have a father like you, or no father at all.
After I have been away for several days, and you - ALONE - since our daughter was at my moms.... Telling me how tired you are?
I cheated on my ex with my now husband and i cheated on my husband with my ex during the first month of our relationship, I guess you could say that I couldn't choose, but ultimately I did choose and I whole heartedly believe that I made the right desicion. How ever, I have never told either of them and I have no intention to. I love my husband with all I have to give and I can't bear the thought that I may loose him over a 3 month period of selfishness! Bash me if you will, Just know that I know I was wrong! I just wont tell that to them!
Why do you insist on playing the part of a victim? I do so much for you, yet you doubt all of my abilities as a human being and a wife. I have completed by undergraduate and graduate degree in less than four years, I have made a career for myself and our family and you still only see my weakness. I know you are jealous of my success and accomplishments, you always have been.
You want me to be June Cleaver, Ruth Bader Ginsberg and Jenna Jameson all in one. I've got news for you, it won't happen!
You hate my male friends, when the truth is that your jealous of the way they care about me and actually listen to what I have to say. I am a beautiful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent, successful wife, mother, daughter and friend. You are the only one who can't see that. Differentiate already!
No, I will never divorce you, be careful though affairs just don't happen.
Holding my hand and talking to me- really TALKING -last night? That is why I fell in love with you, that is why I married you. I just wish there was a way for us to do that more often. I might not feel so alone in this marriage.