Monday, January 25, 2010

True Wife Confessions 24, Sans Kiefer Sutherland

Confession #231

Sometimes I wonder if we should really be together. If it weren't for our
daughter, I'm not sure I would put up with your bullshit.

Confession #232

Have I told you I hate your family? From your alcoholic brother, to your
sister and her inane blathering about nothing, to your father who watched
me from our living rooom, drinking coffee, while I shoveled 18 inches of
snow from our driveway at 6am before I went to work, to your mother who
said "I'll just make some dinner for me and your father" after I came home
from work and picking up our son from football. I mean, hey, don't bother
with us.... we aren't tired or hungry and god knows, we don't have to
eat...... assholes. Next time you go into the hospital and they come to
"help", tell them I'd rather sit through a discussion of third world
politics with Paris Hilton.... at least it will be shorter than their visit
and I know there is an end in sight.

Confession #233

Why do you get pissed off when I ask you not to say inappropriate things in front of our children? I appreciate the fact that you think I'm sexy, but when our seven year old son snuggles up to me and lays his head on my chest, don't look at him and say "hey, those are MINE." That is just wrong, and could be confusing to a child.

Confession #234

I rarely ever orgasm with you. I've faked it 99% of the time that I've been with you. Now that we have two small children, and you continue to not show me any day to day affection, or appreciation, yet have the ability to criticize multiple times a day, I loathe every time we have sex. I find no enjoyment in it. It's all an act. I just go through the motions and wait for it to be done and when it is, I just feel cheap and used up. You're sucking the lively hood out of me, and I just let it happen because I would never be able to support the kids with out your income

Confession #235

Please, for the love of GOD, tell your friends that I don't want to host guests EVERY NIGHT!!! I don't want to go to someone's house to hang out every night that we don't have guests, either. I want some time, just the two of us, to run around the house in our underwear, so to speak. I hate that we can't even spend our ANNIVERSARY together without five different people trying to convince us to go hang out with them even after I've politely declined their offer, explaining that it's our anniversary!!! Some of these friends are in their thirties and forties. They should be grown-up enought to take NO for an answer the first time, not to mention the tenth time I have to say it! If you don't tell them, so help me God, I'm going to tell them, and when I do, we just might have plenty of one-on-one time together for quite a while, get it? And BTW, don't try saying it's her just the same as him, because she's told me she'd rather the two of them spend some alone time at their own house, if she could get him to. You could also be a man and tell them NO yourself, instead of telling them to ask me every time! Grow some, and JUST SAY NO!!

Confession #236

I remember telling you after dating for a month that I had done some things I was not proud of and that if you couldn't handle it you were free to leave. Basically, I would never tell you my NUMBER. Give you the LIST. And I wouldn't want to know yours. You hugged me and said that you didn't care what I had done before. You loved me for who I turned out to be because of those experiences. But, after three years of dating and two years of marriage, you've started to take jabs at the amount of guys I've slept with. I fucking hate you for that. It's really not fair. Doesn't stop me from loving you because I think you're feeling insecure about our postmarried kind of boring sex life, but it still pisses me off. Don't throw that shit in my face.

Confession #237

Yes, I have a cocktail in my hand. Again. For the third night this week. I am the sole caregiver for our young children. The fact that I have a cocktail in my hand 2-3 nights a week...the moment you walk in the door? Ought to be a given!

The fact that I don't wake up in the morning, roll out of bed and immediately pour myself a martini? Well, that is more of a miracle than the Virgin Mary!

Confession #238

You think I'm the perfect wife. You think I enjoy cuddling with you. You have no idea that I'm in love with a woman and have learned why I was never comfortable with the physical part of our relationship.

Confession #239

I'm having a hard time remembering why we got married in the first place, the level of resentment that I feel on almost a daily basis is really starting to "taint" my outlook. I'm tired of coming to you and asking, begging, pleading, yelling, seducing, talking to you about the same thing over and over. I've tried every tactic and it's always the same, I get nothing. How can you expect me to not feel this way when day after day you come home from work and leave it all up to me??? You work late, come home, eat your dinner and spend a lot of your free time on the computer. Do you not realize how shitty I feel when I tell you that I feel lonely and that I need you? Do you not realize how angry it makes me??? Do you not realize that you are supposed to be the 'man of the house' and you need to step it up and HELP ME???? I don't think I can lower my expectations anymore than they already are. This is not the kind of relationship I wanted and it makes me sad.

Confession #240

You made me stop drinking, when you are the one with the outrageous drinking problem. It is so bad, I can't even drink wine with my dinner. When I tell you I'm going to my mothers house for the weekend to help her out, I'm really checked into a hotel drinking all weekend with my girlfriends, and you are the one footing the bill.


Anonymous said...

#238 That is not really fair... You should let him bang your girlfriend as well

Anonymous said...

To Confessor #239:

I am Confessor #3070, I also confessed last August (#2980). I can so COMPLETELY identify with your situation! After being ignored by my husband for years and going through two marriage therapists we are getting a divorce and my spirit is free!

I have recently (after we decided to divorce) started having an affair. He is the most FANTASTIC lover I have ever had and has rekindled the passion in me. I'm not expecting anything long term from this relationship (he's still married), just so thankful that I have found myself again and realized that I am still a passionate person.

I am by no means advocating having an affair, simply stating you need to find a way to get joy back into your life. Try counseling first, if that doesn't help consider alternatives. Life is too short to be miserable.

MH said...

To #238: You should do yourself (and your husband) a favor and leave him. There's nothing wrong with being a lesbian or bisexual, but there is something wrong with living a lie. You'll be much happier when you can be true to yourself. It's the 21st century; the people that truly love you will stand by your side and continue to love you..even after making the "great reveal."

Anonymous said...

As a guy, I wish I had come across this site before I said I do. The amount of deceit women harbor is staggering from faked orgasms,bored housewives who hate that their husbands actually work to take care of them, to secret lesbian girlfriends or the common-"the only man/dick good enough for me is one i'm not married too" mentality. I guess my question is this, why if marriage is so horrible why do women continue to force this antiquated arrangement on men? Really.

Anonymous said...

I am confessor #3070:

This is why this site is so popular, because so many women are married to men who don't want to be married. "Forcing" an antiquated arrangement on men? So your wife held a gun to your head in order to get you to say "I do"? Last time I checked men had free will just like women. If you don't believe in marriage or don't believe it is right for you DON'T DO IT!!

The Shitty Astrologer said...

Confession #231 - I wonder how many people out there actually feel like that...

Jenny said...

I think its obvious that marriage doesn't work. As woman I can agree with that guy's comment. Luckily I came across this blog years ago when I was itching to get married. I was living with my bf of several years and everyone said it was time... I'm happier being single and having Bf's then being tied down. Of course I love sex, sports etc. so I'm not the typic woman on this blog, but I think the guy has a point.