Confession # 3031
You're a perfect husband, perfect father & my best friend. Sometimes I think you notice everything else but me, even when my eating disorder is obvious to everyone else, you still don't say a word, when your word is the only one I want to hear
Confession # 3032
I'm going through a divorce and my boyfriend just broke up with me.
Guess which hurts worse...why?
Confession # 3033
I have never been more tempted in a relationship by so many attractive men! However, i'm marrying you and i love you. There will never come a day when i cheat on you because you are above all those men i see. They don't hold my heart, you do.
Confession # 3034
You hate trying to learn new technology. I don't enjoy learning it but I'm pretty good at it. If I take the time to try to explain something you'll need to know, SHUT UP AND PAY ATTENTION. Ask questions. Write stuff down. Don't distract me with trivial shit that happened today. The next time you ask me how to work the remote I'm going to respond, "so many day students came to the night class that there wasn't any room to spread around." The next time you ask me to load songs into your MP3 player, I'll tell you "my back tires are going to need to be replaced soon."
Confession # 3035
The first time we had sex, I smelled shit. I didn't stop and have you
go wipe your ass because I figured shit happens, and as long as it
stayed where it was, I'd be fine. Now I think you did it on purpose to
test my self-respect. Of course, it seems like every interaction we
had, you were testing my self-respect. Were you looking for an excuse
to treat me like something you need to wipe off your ass? Or are you
just that fundamentally nasty? I like to think that if you ever get
with a girl who doesn't accept your shit, you'll treat her with the
respect I deserved. I prefer to conceive of you as manipulative and
judgmental, rather than just a disgusting hypocrite. It's easier on my
Confession # 3036
To my ex-husband:
I appreciate that you lost your job. I understand that jobs are hard to find right now. I am proud for you that you are trying to better yourself by going back to college, but at the same time, I still have to support our child. That child support check that you were sending didn't do a whole lot, but I still depended on it.
While you're off having the time of your life in college (and reporting it all back to me), I am having to take 100% responsibility of our child. Again.
So keep going to college if you want. I'm all for it. Just remember, though, you aren't a kid anymore. You can't just go to school part of the day and then blow the rest of the day. Get out there and get a job and help support this child that you so badly wanted once upon a time! I need some help here!
Confession # 3037
I wish you'd be a bit more concerned about the blatantly apparent fact that your brother wants me. I think it got a bit over the top when he brought his new squeeze to the family dinner and she looked THAT much like me. Are you expecting me to keep quiet about it until its too late?
Confession # 3038
You stupid fool. You think that your smarter than me, just because I haven't confronted you about your affair with one of your co-workers. You silly man. I m just bidding my time. I'm done being your wife. The worse part is that I thought that we were actually making progress into being in a loving relationship. You are not the first man to cheat on his pregnant wife and you won't be the last. I will have the last laugh though because I started using your tooth brush to clean the toilet. Now every morning when you brush your teeth I have to stop myself from laughing.
Confession # 3039
I have been your secretary for 15 years. We have had a close friendship almost from the first day you hired me. That is nice and all but the truth is that I have really strong feelings for you. We are both married and I would never want to do anything that would hurt your family or my family. I am not the cheating type and neither are you. That is part of what I love about you. I would not leave my spouse and I know you would not either. We talk all the time and we both know that neither of us are happy in our marriage and stick around for our kids. Here is the thing, we are not getting any younger. Fifteen years is a long time to have feelings for someone. I don't want to die without showing you how I feel about you. There are times when we are working and you are close to me that I am sure you feel the same way I do. When you are out of the office you always take my calls even when you are busy. You don't even seem to mind if I don't have much to say. Do you know I am really just calling cause I miss you and want to hear you voice? When you got sick earlier this year I was so afraid I would lose you and you would never know how I felt about you for so long. Let's both do something for ourselves for a change. Why don't we forget about work and home for a few hours and just be together? I know you are respectful, you are 12 years older than me, you are my boss and would never make the first move. Give me an opportunity and I assure you I will. I think you are smart, sexy, kind, funny and I cherish every minute I am with you. Next time you go on a business trip, take me with you. I promise you won't regret it.
Confession # 3040
You delight me in ways I never thought possible. I love buying costumes to dress up for you and you glow when I walk out in a new outfit. Yes, the sex is great - Amazing - but it is the play, the silliness, the openness in our love that is grounds me to you. I love laughing with you.